A thousand years Is a long long time
Even for a star up in the sky
I could count the tears
And the long long nights
But I'd rather just remember how you smile
- KT Tunstell and Bleu
The sun was shining, flowers were growing, birds were singing. If she were to touch in on the optimistic part of herself, today was an absolutely beautiful day.
Except the honest part of herself was telling her otherwise.
Another series of loud, painful sounding coughs came from down the hall. She winced and hoped that the tears in her eyes wouldn't fall; she needed to be strong. For her friends, for her brother, for her kids—
"Master Katara, Avatar Aang would like to see you."
—and for him especially.
Katara smiled a watery smile, giving a slight nod to the air acolyte. She mentally thanked the woman for not asking her is she was okay or not.
How would any woman feel if her best friend, lover, husband was dying?
As she made her way down the hall, steps quite slower than the ones she used to take when she was a youth, she let her mind wander, just a bit.
Aang was dying. He was old. Granted, only sixty-seven years has he lived, but what about those one hundred years in an iceberg? They both knew they've been running on borrowed time. She should be grateful he made it this far.
Though she's trying to console herself, plead with her emotions, it still hurts. Oh so terribly, she hurts.
She's Master Katara. She was a master waterbender at fourteen. She fought in a war; she helped people escape from prison, she brought down the toughest of opponents, and she—she healed even the nastiest of wounds.
She reaches the room and a few of the tears fall. Her husband, laying on their shared bed, body looking frail and sickly, was still smiling at her as he did on their wedding day and so many other days.
She's reminded of why she loves him. He's dying, for spirit's sake, yet he isn't letting that bring him down. Not even the pain that's truly hurting him, pain she can't heal.
That's what hurts the most. She was a waterbender healer, known to be one of the best. And yet? She can't heal him. She can't ease this pain.
She can't stop him from dying, though she's already done that before.
"Katara?" His voice is a wheeze, but she can hear the kindness and softness in which he spoke with.
She smiles at him wordlessly and walks over to him, sitting down on the mattress by his side and taking his hand with her own.
She lets out a sob when she feels how utterly cold it is, despite it being late spring and he's covered in blankets.
"My dear Katara," Aang mumbles, pain evident in his voice. But not because he's hurting, not because he is literally on his death bed, but because his wife was upset.
Oh, she loved him so. She already misses him and he hasn't even died yet.
They don't speak for a while. She just sits there, holding his hand tightly, crying till her eyes are red and puffy and the tear stains on her cheeks seem to be permanent.
"Are you giving up?" She wants to yell at herself for sounding so angry, for not accepting that life happens, but when had she ever? Age doesn't just take away a personality.
But Aang doesn't yell, or make a face. It's like he's used to it. Then again, after you've been with someone for almost your whole life, you tend to get used to these things.
And for spirit's sake, he's still smiling!
"No, and you are aware of that." She wants to say something about him being short with her, about him just so easily going with the difficulty thrust upon them, about assuming she was okay with this.
Though, he never said she was okay. He said she was aware.
The waterbender doesn't want to admit this, but he's right.
He squeezed her hand and she instantly lifts the open one to her lips, trying to stifle the sob.
"Katara, look at me," she does so, cringing when her eyes meet his.
How can such a man, body ill and health failing, have eyes so bright and a smile so genuine?
"We have known this was going to happen. It isn't news to us. I've lived, I've loved, and I made my mark on this world. I did my duty as an Avatar, I helped whenever and whoever I could. And if I were to be honest with myself, I think I've been a pretty decent father and husband as well." He chuckled, which made her smile, but then it turned into coughs and worry seized her heart.
Slowly, he met her eyes again after he had to look away as he was sick. Tears were still in her eyes, making him a bit blurry, but she could still see his smile.
"You've been with me for a long while, Katara. We've been through so much together," he squeezed her hand and she did so back. "I'm happy. I'm so grateful for the life I lived. I know I can go in peace now, journey into the spirit world, sit with Gyatso and the other airbenders again."
She knowns he's being truthful with her. She can see he's excited, not because of death, but because of the new life that will become of him once he passes over.
She feels a pang in her heart different than the pain she'd been feeling since Aang fell ill.
It's because while he's ready to go, to journey into his new life in the Spirit World, she doesn't want to let him go. And he knows that. He called her in here to ask for her permission to leave this world and go to the next.
It hits her like a tsunami. She chokes on a sob, tears now coming in waves. She wants to say so much, tell him it's okay to go, tell him that she hopes he'll be happy, that she'd rather him go away from her (though she'd miss him so terribly) if it meant he wouldn't be in pain any longer, that she's sorry she held him back for so long.
He has been holding onto his life to make sure she wouldn't be in too much pain after he left.
Oh, she loves him so much.
And he loves her.
"Oh, Katara, my dear," he tries his best to wipe away her tears but it's hard when his hand his shaking so much and so cold she flinches away. "I know, I know." He says softly, and she just want to kiss him.
It'll hurt. When he leaves, it'll hurt so much. But she'll see him again. Eventually, she'll pass on, too. Plus, the world is going to need another avatar that isn't sick in a bed, awaiting death to come.
It won't be easy. She's lived by his side since she was a teen, she doesn't really know how not to live with him. But she also knows that she can move on from it. Maybe not soon, or without trouble, but it will come to pass.
The crying stops, whether because she was beginning to accept his death or because she simply ran out of tears, she doesn't quite know. But when she looks at him, she sees not a man on his death bed.
She sees the young boy she pulled from an iceberg, eyes bright and smile on his face.
"Maybe we can go penguin sledding in the Spirit World whenever I come to meet you."
Avatar Aang passed away that night,
his hand holding her own
with a smile still on his face.
Katara, now white-haired and wrinkly, stand before two very nervous parents, though she can see the pride shining in their eyes. There's also some concern in there, as well as some hesitation. And Katara knows why.
"You're really old." a small girl, not even of five years yet, states in a know-it-all tone with her arms crossed over her tiny chest and her bottom lip poking out. Her parents instantly go to chastise her and apologize, but the elderly woman simply laughs, halting them in their steps.
"Yes, but I can still land you right on your bottom, young lady." She smiles, quite amused with the little girl.
The girl squints her eyes as if she's sizing the waterbender up. She's trying to see if the woman is worth her attention, if she can pass the test. Apparently, she does.
Suddenly, a huge grin splits over her face and Katara knows she's seen that before. The words that come next are words she heard before, words that came from her late husband, the last avatar, now coming from the new one. Tears gather in her eyes but this time, unlike for the passed four years, are happy tears.
"Do you want to go penguin sledding with me?"
In a thousand years
I know that our love will still be here
So close your eyes, my dear
Knowing that our love is going to last one thousand years
