A/N- So the lovely Dolly brought to my attention this little fic, which according to the time stamp on my archive blog, I wrote almost two years ago, and somehow never cross-posted. Yay. So here it is, my ode to Joe failing to understand how healthy relationships work.


Her fingers clench against the tree, her forehead pressed into the bark, and then her dainty hand has curled into a fist and slammed into the trunk hard enough to send an entire segment of mossy bark scattering and forever altering the direction the tree leans. She's sobbing now, trying to keep it quiet but unsuccessful and the attempt is agonizing.

He rushes to her and lays his large hands upon her shoulders, but it's no use. She can't hear him no matter how loud he shouts, she can't see him when he's right in front of her, and she can't feel his attempts at comfort. No matter how close he holds her, she can't feel it, she doesn't turn into his touch the way she always did. Even before they were lovers, they were friends and partners, and by the time they were fifteen she had developed an instinctive positive response to his touch- just as he had to her. But now she doesn't even know he's here, can't even take solace in the comfort of his arms the way she used to, and maybe it's conceited of him but he can't help but feel that she needs him now more than ever.

"Marie! Marie, I'm here!" he shouts, right in her ear, and she shivers but that's it. It's no good.

Joe Buttataki never believed in ghosts. What was a ghost but an imprint of the soul, and if he, of all people, could not see such a thing, it couldn't possibly exist. And yet, here he is. He doesn't know any other word for what he has become but "ghost," for he is most assuredly dead.

"Marie…"

A different voice, a lighter tenor that he recognizes instantly, speaks her name, and there he is. A certain Doctor Franken Stein (though BJ never did find out what sort of doctorate the unhinged man managed to earn).

It's a bitter sort of helpless jealousy when Marie turns unhesitatingly to bury her face against Stein's chest, muffling her sobs against his lab coat. To his amazement, however, the scientist wraps his arms around the pretty blonde in return, and the look on his face is… difficult to read. Pinched up like he's in pain, but somehow still concerned. Almost… tender. It's a strange look, Joe thinks, and the Professor is so much more grounded in the present moment than he ever did during their school days together.

Back then, Marie was his unattainable partner, all wrapped up in fantasies of Franken, doodling Mrs. Stein with little hearts in her notebooks, all while the scythe technician in question was cheerfully oblivious, casually threatening other students and making everyone around him question what on earth the sweetheart of Shibusen saw in him… and he, Joe, her own meister, pined for her endlessly. And one day she'd finally turned around and seen him, and he'd thought he'd got the girl at last… but of course, he had to go and cock that up like the coward he was.

And just when he'd finally been on the path to fix things and get what he'd wanted all along… a flash of blue eyes and a gleaming blade with near-surgical precision had put an end to it all.

"I guess you win, Professor" Joe whispered, watching as Stein stroked Marie's hair with uncharacteristic gentleness.

He couldn't bring himself to feel any real enmity towards the other man, never had, really. Envy, certainly, but his real concern was for Marie.

"You better make her happy, you old madman, because I swear if you don't take good care of her I will haunt your lab and mess with you until you're ten times crazier than you already are."

Stein looked right at him and said, "Understood."

"What?" Marie peered up at him from within the circle of his arms, looking as confused as Joe felt.

Stein shook his head. "It's nothing. Just… thinking out loud."

Marie sniffled and went back to leaning on him, while Stein and the echo of the man who was once Joe Buttataki shared a moment of simpatico over her head.