A/N: Well instead of killing myself over the promo, I've decided to focus my attention on this rather happy episode: Chasing Pavements. This isn't Fadam, it's Fiona-Adam friendship. Enjoy! I own nothing.

Dear Adam,

I'm sorry for everything; you must hate me. You've been nothing but good to me and I just used you. I'm sorry for trying to make you what I want; a girl. I'm a lesbian, and I wish I'd figured that out before I hurt you. I'm sorry for disrespecting who you really are. You'll find a great girl one day, Adam, and I wish it could be me. Hope you can forgive me one day.

-Fiona

I folded the letter and slid it through the slit in his locker door.

The bell rang and I walked away quickly, not wanting to have to face Adam in person. After all, writing the letter was hard enough. Adam's such a great guy, but that's just it. He's a guy. And I want a girl.

I want Holly J.

I gasped a little when I thought her name, a pang of I'm not sure what rushing to my heart. Hurt? Love? Or maybe it was a combination of both. I thought about what my mom said: Love is never easy. I've never heard truer words in my entire life. I never thought that the first person I loved wouldn't love me back though. I most certainly never expected that person to be in love with my brother instead.

I told Declan, and he was just as understanding as my mom was. I didn't tell him that I love Holly J though; I thought that might freak him out a little. After all, he loved her first, so I guess he has dibs.

I laughed when I thought about how strange that is, that my brother and I love the same girl. It's really a different kind of situation.

But then again, I've always been different.

And I'd rather be different than unhappy any day.

The bell rang again and I realized that I was probably late for class. Oh well, I'm not really in the mood for History.

I walked outside the main door and strolled around the front steps of Degrassi idly. I sat down on the front steps and sighed, surrendering to my emotions.

I think of how much I love Holly J and how I know she'll never love me back…and all I want is a drink.

A tear trickled down my face and I wiped it away.

At least she still loves me, even though I'm a lesbian. Even if it's not in the way I want her too, at least she still loves me.

I sighed and staggered to my feet, thinking I might as well just go back to class, when I saw him.

"Adam, hi." I said, a little shocked. I can't read the expression on his face, is he mad at me? Did he get my letter?

He stared down at the ground for a second, not meeting my eyes.

Finally he looked at me and took a deep breath.

"I wish it could be you too Fiona."

He grinned at my sadly and I returned it.

"But..." He started.

"I'm a lesbian." I finished for him, and then chuckled a little at my own bluntness.

He looked a little uncomfortable then. "Right. And I'm, well I'm not a girl…"

"Oh Adam, I know you aren't!" I said, moving a little closer to him as if to hug him but then decided against it for the time being. "I'm so sorry for calling you one before. You're a guy, and I accept that."

He smiled at me gratefully and I decided that I really did want to hug him. I opened my arms and he wrapped his arms around me as well, pulling me close to his chest.

He feels so soft, so nice…

But I have to stop myself before I start thinking he's a girl again.

I pulled away then and grinned.

"Thanks Fiona. I wish…I wish more people would accept that."

His expression became more serious then and I looked at him with sorrow. "It must be really hard." I said.

He just nodded. "Yeah. My own family just recently came around. How did your family react to you being a lesbian?"

"They accepted me right away." I said, feeling even more relieved and thankful for that than I did before. How could Adam's own family not accept him?

"That's good." He said. "It helps to have all the support you can get. It helps you stay strong."

"You mean through the teasing, the bullying; the general hardships of being different?" I asked.

He nodded.

I sighed. "I've always been different, and I've been given a hard time about before. But this feels like a new different. A good different."

Adam nodded then and I could tell he related. "Like you're happier being who you really are than acting like someone that others want you to be."

"Exactly!" I said, and then I thought of something. "Oh God Adam, I'm so sorry if I put you in that position."

He shook his head immediately. "No Fiona, its fine. You've already apologized enough."

He smiled and it warmed my heart. "So does this mean we're friends?"

As answer he pulled me into another hug.

"Friends."

I pulled away but kept hold of his hand out of habit, then dropped it and blushed.

"You know…friends can hold hands." He suggested, and smiled sheepishly.

I interlaced his fingers in mine.

"As long as you're okay with it."

He nodded and smiled. "I am."

We stood there in silence for a moment until I had an idea.

"You know, our movie night got interrupted the other night. Friends can also skip school together and watch movies." I smirked slyly and Adam caught my drift.

"That sounds like the most fun I've had in a long time."

I beamed at him and we took off, running out of the school parking lot to hail a cab.

And I felt better than I have in a long time.