He isn't sure what kind of reaction he expected from Hide. Probably something like fear, or maybe disgust. Blank-faced, shivering, pants-wetting surprise would have been nice. Anything but this. For about the tenth time in their discussion, Kaneki wishes Hide would be vaporized on the spot by some magnanimous ghoul-god (do ghouls even have an organized ghoul religion?) because otherwise he's going to take Hide to some deserted alley after they're done and kill him slowly if the bastard doesn't just shut up.
Hide is head-over-heels, glancing from Touka to Nishio like he's just come up against a pair of celebrities. "So you eat people?" he asks, again, earning himself a glare from Touka; even stoic, could-kill-you-with-a-look Touka is done with Hide's bullshit.
"Yes, maggot-face, we do," Nishio drawls, leaning against the countertop and looking fondly at an empty beer can someone's left behind, probably wishing his digestive system could handle beer so that he could get drunk enough to deal with the situation at hand. "You've asked that already. It's old news. Move on."
"It's like I'm in a horror movie," Hide marvels. There is an absolutely ridiculous grin on his face. "My friend is a ghoul. My senior's a ghoul. The smoking-hot-but-icy chick who works at the cafe is a ghoul. Oh my god."
Touka draws a finger across her throat. The threat goes unnoticed.
Kaneki watches as Hide's eyes light up, groaning mentally and bracing himself for whatever will come out of his friend's (ex-friend, certainly, when this ordeal is over with) mouth. "Hey, Nishiki. You said ghouls have, like, super-strength and durability, right? So, uh..."
"What?"
Hide waggles his eyebrows. "Do you do it better with Kimi?"
Touka opens her mouth, ready to give Hide the verbal lashing of a lifetime, but Nishio speaks first. Without missing a beat, he answers, "Yeah. I do. You got a problem?"
"Um." Hide's been momentarily transformed into a giggly schoolboy. Kaneki can't take it anymore. "When you eat her out-"
"I only did it literally once."
Cue more laughter.
God. What a fucking idiot.
a/n: ok this was a stupid spur-of-the-moment thing, just so you know.
8/14!: fixed an error about ghoul diets.
