Okay, a little side project here. a little one shot idea that popped in my head that turned into great little story when I RPed with my beta friend Timeghost823. I wanted to try a different perspective and well it was cool to write. Turns out its a three shot instead because its so long. I must give half the credit to Timeghost. Without her this would never have gotten to this point!
Disclaimer: I own nothing but Marty, and I earn bupkiss from this.
A TRIP TO LONDON PART. 1
The waxing crescent glowed down upon my visage as if mocking me of my small inconvenience. I stood dispassionately by the side of the narrow two lane asphalt gazing about the unremarkable landscape. Short stubby trees dotted about the softly rolling fields of wild growing grass and weeds. Not a single living biped touched my vast senses for miles around, and I knew it would be the like for many more miles to come. The only thing with a heartbeat were rabbits in burrows and the occasional fox hunting for its next meal. I couldn't bother myself with them for I was not so desperate of hunger to engorge on such paltry blood, at least not yet.
A cool breeze wafted through my duster and feathered the ends of my sangria red cravat. The faint scent of wild flowers mixed in with rain dampened earth. Spring was drawing to a close to welcome in the somewhat annoying days of summer heat, dry earth, and prickling humidity that those of my kind find uncomfortable. I much prefer winter, and the whipping cold that steals the warmth from those whom are determined to keep it at all costs. Fools, everything goes cold in the end.
Earlier, when my dilemma had first presented myself, I debated on whether I should glide into air as my horde of bats or race as a shadow over the land, but then I considered my reserves. I had over five hundred miles ahead of me between the fringes of Halkirk to London. Even I could not travel that far in a single night by vampiric means. If the maggot hadn't gotten the bright idea to blow up the transport vehicle I had rode in, including the driver and the spare reserves of blood I would not even be thinking of this.
No matter, what is done is done. At least I saw the look of fright on his face when I broke his little rocket launcher then broke him. I small smirk worked its way into my face. Master won't be pleased. I can hear her bellowing already, her increased blood pressure coursing through her neck and her cheeks flushing ever so slightly. There were few women I knew that truly looked wondrous when boiling mad. Sometimes, one of her fits of anger would make my whole week if I were the one to instill it in her.
I turned away from my musings to walk nonchalantly at the road side hoping to sense upon a living structure with a working automobile. The less energy I use the better. My diet was light on the 36 hour trip up to the small dull town with the bug problem, and so I was bit peckish to say the least and running on empty as would humans say. Not to mention that the idiot Police Girl had stocked up the van with my least favorite type of blood, B+, lessening my desire to drink it in the first place. Ah, but to the issue at hand. It was nearing eleven o'clock and there still was not a thing in sight to assist me in my journey home, or rather where I currently occupy my coffin. My real home was a world away and already lost, however there was no need to dwell on the past. Nothing productive came of it.
My sensitive ears picked up a motor coming towards me on road from the north. Bright twin eyes appeared on the horizon behind me. This has promise, I thought to myself as the shape of the car became clearer to me. From what I could tell it was mid-seventies style Mini Cooper in flat, faded blue. The paint was chipped all over with rusted blotches on the metal frame. I also caught the sight of a faded bumper that read "Caution, I brake for Elves, Fairies, Gnomes, Leprechauns, Unicorns, Dragons, & other invisible creatures that only I could see." Humph, charming. Accompanying the engine sound was a radio blaring with the driver singing at the top of her lungs. I forced myself not to wince from her high pitch. Humoring myself, I stuck my thumb out to see if the woman driver would indeed stop. She didn't. I was ignored completely. Apparently the human was too engrossed in singing her throat sore to even notice a six foot seven devilishly handsome man on the side of the road. I quirked my lip. She'll notice me soon enough.
I materialized to her left in the passenger seat with my hands neatly clasped atop my legs.
The woman continued to sing. "I can't escape myself, So many times I've lied, But there's still rage inside! Somebody get me through this nightmare…"
I grinned wide for the driver. "Good Evening."
She paused in her singing to greet "Oh hey." Then continued into another verse when her eyes widened in complete surprise of me, producing a full body jerk. I felt the tires veer off the road. A half second later the human did too and in response slammed her foot on the brakes. Unprepared for that my head slapped onto the narrow dashboard, a dashboard littered with glued on trinkets and other loose junk. I pealed a miniature bedeviled rubber duck out of my eye and flicked it to the floor.
"What the fuck!" Her back twisted pressing herself against the driver side door. "Where the hell did you come from?"
I restrained my annoyance of her vocal volume and said politely. "It matters not how. I am simply a man in need of a ride home… to London."
Her light green eyes stared at me warily. I could see the thoughts churning behind her eyes. "Not so simple I think. Why you dressed as a pimp?"
My lips turned slightly downward. Really? Such a vulgar thing to be described as. "These clothes suit me. All I ask is to be taken to London. I can pay you whatever amount you need."
Her face softened while I watched well manicured fingernails tap the steering wheel in thoughtful gesture. If worse came to worse I can tap her veins till she passed out then drive the car myself. However, I repelled that idea as the scent of her blood reminded me of a drug polluted whore too long in the streets. I was certainly not that hungry.
Nibbling on her lips briefly she said "Just for shits and giggles, how much would you pay me?"
"Enough to give this trash heap an overhaul." I suggested in reply.
She balked at my answer. "Hey! Don't insult Bessie!" Then I stared irritated while she proceeded to pat the side of the car's paneling and coo at it like a small child or pet.
"Fine," I said, my annoyance leaking out, "How about seven hundred pounds, you may use it for kindling for all I care."
She quirked a lip. "Alright, but you pay for meals and gas too!"
I nodded then added. "I request that you drive only at night."
"Alright but pay for decent coffee and you sleep in the car, bub." She said at me pointing a scratch scarred finger at me. I nodded again. "Sweet!" She squealed then shifted the old car into drive. She started singing again. "I used to rule the world! Seas would rise when I gave the word- Oh yes, I'll be making a short little stop if you don't mind. Kinda caught me with a load." Her left thumb jutted to the back.
I was not interested enough to physically look back there as the car's front seat space had enough pointless things to occupy my eyes, the woman included. I cared not if she made a stop as long as it was brief. She returned to singing obscenely with the radio and I tuned her out as best I could which was actually hard as she obviously was tone deaf and I suspected she did it on purpose to try to punish me for my slight of intruding upon her. Instead I studied her visage with my third eye as it was generally rude to stare, not that I mind being rude, but I did need the human biped amiable for the time being.
Her hair, bright red, did not appear to know what a comb was, was held down by a greenish boonie hat with both sides of the rim buttoned up to a cap. A shoe lace served to hold it onto her head during fierce updrafts lay loose under her jaw. Skin was naturally tanned by her genetics though a few shades lighter than master's and bore a smattering of brown freckles across her cheeks and a slightly bulbous nose. Green eyes spoke of mischief for the half hour I had sat beside her. At least that was the impression the twin orbs gave me. I could not easily ascertain her thoughts, nor did I bother to pry. She was no one.
Fingers rested on the tan wheel of the vehicle tapping generally to the song she currently blared into the small space. The left hand bore four parallel yet jagged lines of pale tissue. They looked at least ten years old starting from her outer wrist to the tips of her fingers. It was evident that an altercation had taken place with a large animal of sorts. I cared not what her history was. At least three sets of earrings pierced into her lobes two of them dangled with small stones and soft metal. There was a forth that only adorned her right ear that bobbled a larger dark green stone with orange flecks. She wore a pink, purple, and green tie-dyed t-shirt, tattered loose blue jeans, and red Ked sneakers with miss-matching shoe laces. It was apparent I had found the most obvious woman in all of Britain.
Her transportation was no less noticeable with a multitude of figurines and rough earth crystals on the dash, beads and necklaces roped on the rear-view mirror, and the mismatching seat covers on the two buckets. One of blue fake fur while the other had red flowers printed all over. Clearly this woman had no color coordination. I noted that even the car smell was unique. A mish mash of herbs, dust, and motor oil mingled somewhat unpleasantly in the interior.
Suddenly the woman slammed on the breaks. "Oh! Here we are!" She yammered, locking it into park and turning off the key.
Once again my head connected with the dash board collecting a nice sharp crystal in my left cheek. I growled plucking the damned thing out.
"You know seatbelts are there for a reason." My darkened eyes glared almost murderously though I only caught her back as she exited the contraption. After a few moments her head popped back in. "You can help me ya know. I got lots in the trunk to move." I resisted grumbling and pulled myself out of the car. The woman busily jiggled a key into the trunk then popped it open. When she stood back up she stared hard up at me as if seeing me for the first time. "God, you're tall." She mouthed with two fingers up seeming to take my stature for mental filing later.
Her head shook then brusquely shoved a box at me. I took it in my hands then she placed another atop of it along with a bag full of a smelly herb inside it. She grabbed two bags then walked off to a quant fenced yard. I followed. At a stubby wooden gate she paused lifted her foot, cried a Kiai, and kicked the gate open with a resounding bang on the fence. "Still the master." She snorted then proceeded into the yard and to the front door. Again she stopped at the door, this time murmuring nonsense and jiggling with her keys. I followed her into a cluttered domicile into a kitchen which was the opposite of everything I have thus far seen of her living spaces. It was pristine, clean, and bare of any non essentials save for a flower vase under a window. "Put those there please" I placed the bag and two boxes on the counter where she indicated. "Drat! I forgot that little box in the trunk. Would you be a peach and bring it in please? Oh, don't open it though. I gotta gather a few things for our road trip!" Her green eyes lit in excitement then left the kitchen.
'Why not?' I thought then walked out to the car. I spotted the unassuming box far in the trunk. I swept it up in one hand. It was no larger than my fist. Something inside me itched to open it. What could be inside? She let a perfect stranger in her house and agreed to take me to London, so what could be so important in this tiny thing that I was not allowed to see? I was halfway through the yard when curiosity got best of me. I opened the woodened hinged lid. I frowned in disappointment. There was nothing in the stupid box. It was then that the box snapped shut and a bizarre force pulled my hand down to the ground with the box very much attached to my hand. In the process of my descent to gravity I collided with a few metal wind chimes creating quite a stir of noise. My focus was the box however, which seemed to be sucking something out of me; my vampiric energy I suspect. I snarled at the thing thrashing about trying to get my hand out from under the bedeviled thing. I stopped at the sight of the five foot one woman standing over me with a gym bag and a cooler in her hands.
"You opened it, didn't ya? Idiot!" She stepped casually over me to deposit her things in the trunk, muttering "Blood sucker can't follow one little rule."
I hissed. "Undo this at once, Witch!" She returned to hover over me.
"Hey its YOUR fault that you opened it. Whatever, I'm a Gypsy not a witch! There's a difference. Did you think I didn't know what you were? I practically breath magic. I couldn't have you near me without some precautions." She pick up the box easily and moved off. I lunged at her only to get shocked by an invisible field around her. It jerked me back a few feet. She tucked the box back in the trunk and locked the trunk. "I wouldn't do that. As long as you harbor ill toward me that will happen." I picked up my wide rimmed hat and flexed my fingers into a fist at her. "I'll return your powers at the journey's end." Her irked tone suddenly brightened. "So! Lets go! We're burnin' moonlight." then giggled on her way into the car. With reluctance I bent down into the passenger seat and shut the door. She turned over the engine, put it into gear, and sang passionately with the first song on the radio while I sat there grumbling with arms crossed.
Thirty minutes in and I'd had enough. I still had some control over my shadows so I slinked one into the radio and yanked out the wires. Silence blessed the interior for a few seconds.
"What the?" She woman pulled off the side of the road and fiddled with the small buttons and LED display. It was obviously too new to come with the forty year old car. "Its always doing this.
'Wonder why.' I thought sarcastically.
The Radio blipped back on. "Here we go. Hey, you got a preference?"
Grumbling internally 'must have used her bloody magic.' With a sneer I answered "Silence."
"If the music was bothering you, you could have said something earlier." She drawled turning the radio off and pulling back into drive. A long minute of silence ensued. Of course the woman did not seem the type to stay quiet for long. "By the way I don't think we've made introductions. I'm Marty, and you are…?"
I did not turn to look at the woman as I spoke the name.
"Alucard…" She tested my name on her tongue then seemed to think about it. Perhaps she had heard of me. If she had I hoped that it would bring fear into her heart that she was sitting next to the No Life King. After a few moments she did pale slightly with a hint of anxiety tinting her odor. "Oh crap, Count… Dracula?" Widened eyes glared at me for which I returned a crooked grin. Her eyes focused back on the road and after a few moments her discomfort of me was gone. "Pleasure to meet you Alucard!" She spouted cheerfully.
It quite irked me that she just threw away her apprehension of me so quickly as if I was merely a false alarm; a rattling in the bushes that turned out to be a rabbit. This was not wise on her part. I still had considerable strength over her despite her protective barrier. Gypsy or no I still had the advantage. Surely her mind was not as protected. I tested this rubbing my consciousness against hers seeing if could sense her thoughts and then manipulate them. She blocked me there as well. What was worse was that she knew I tried to pry.
"Hey! that's an invasion of my space ya perv!" She physically swatted at me. I hissed lowly at the tiny invasion of my person she had done me, then tuned her out completely for next hour. She seemed to occupy that time by talking to herself about nonsense or perhaps she was trying to strike up a conversation with me, but like I said I was not listening.
The gnawing of hunger of my insides persisted at me for a drink and it was in the second hour that something had occurred to me. "You're masking your blood scent aren't you?" Every gypsy I had encountered before was quite edible; a delicacy of sorts among medians.
She smiled twisting her head to show me the odd ball earring. "Yep! Blood stone, a lovely little rock. Also projects the force field keeping me safe from you."
Knowing that her current scent was a deception made my mouth water. I haven't had gypsy in such a long time. I prodded her hungrily. "Gypsies go down rather easily."
"Sheesh" rolling her eyes. "if you're that hungry go grab a squirrel."
I was not amused. "I don't do squirrel, human."
"A fox then. They're gamier!" She suggested in exasperation. It was then that the pit of my stomach made its empty discomfort known with an audible gurgle. I hated it when it did that. Suddenly she snorted. "I was not aware your dead insides could still do that!" She said humorously. "Okay, okay." She stretched an arm across my chest. "Just so you know if I pass out, you do too."
Mildly surprised but did not look a gift horse in the mouth. I lifted the wrist up to my lips, briefly licked the spot with my tongue, then neatly bit twin fangs into the flesh. She gasped slightly, but kept her attention on the road. Her blood melted in my mouth and barely suppressed a groan of pleasure. Ah, the fine texture glided down my throat like a caress as the warmth of it coated my insides like a long lost lover.
Too soon I had to stop the gentle sucking on her flesh as I noticed her eyes hazing over slightly. I noted that even her skin tasted of a sweet nectar. I licked over the holes sealing them up and released her arm.
"Oi, a bit woozy, hey hand me a granola bar out of the glove box would ya?"
"With pleasure," as a small token of my appreciation I complied handing her the wrapped human snack. She ripped the wrapper off with her teeth with a practiced flare and gobbled the nutty bar down. "Mmm, yummers" She muttered afterward. "So, Vladie, now that you're listening, what brought you to this neck of the woods?"
"Business." I answered vaguely.
"Come now, you can be honest with me. I already know who you are."
The way she said that last sentence tickled the back of my mind but I ignored it. The woman was nothing but trouble. I did however relent to divulging some details. "I was sent here to take care of some unfriendly individuals. The individual in question removed my former transportation."
Her head bobbed. "Uh huh, so why not call for service?"
"Phone died, quite literally."
"Man that's a cursed day you're having. Aren't you glad I happened by!"
I bothered not to respond to her over the top enthusiasm.
"Well you're lucky I was delayed with a road block in the last town. Had to go around, but at least I found some foxglove so it wasn't a total waste." She rattled in that voice that was a pitch too high to be soothing.
'Road block, humph.' I had a pivotal hand in that. I glared out the window settling into my typical abyss of the doldrums.
At three am the woman Marty open her maw in a great yawn. "Oi, I needs coffee." She pulled off the side of the road near a grassy plain of flat land. Hints of salt and drying seaweed coated the breeze twitching my nose. The ocean was nearby. The woman hopped out to open the trunk. "What are you doing, woman?"
"What's it look like? I'm getting coffee! You might as well get out and stretch a bit."
I grumbled but phased beside her as she opened up her cooler. It did feel good to get out of that small contraption. She pulled out a small thermos then pulled out a short fat wine bottle with surprise. "Huh, so that's where I stuck that. Hey vamp, wanna glass?" I leaned slightly over her shoulder to look at the vintage. Her grip tightened around both items as I did so. The label was of a French Cabernet sauvignon, of which I particularly liked, but of a brand I was unfamiliar. It was twenty years old and I knew unopened and sealed as it was that it had a nice aroma.
"I don't know the maker but I'll tests its merit." I said finally.
"All right! But I'm not letting you have it straight. Let me find a cup." She pulled out two ceramic mugs. The one she gave me had a cartoon mouse painted on it. Hers had yellow daisies. Surely this was an insult to wine connoisseurs everywhere, but then again the wine she had could be worthy of nothing else. She popped open the cork, lightly wafted the escaping aroma with her fingers, then poured the red liquid halfway up my cup. "I have a two glass limit, so you know." She then corked the bottle and proceeded with her coffee snuffing the lightly steamy brown mix with a contented sigh.
I lightly swirled the dark red fluid inhaling deeply with more dignity then she did with hers. It was pleasant just as I sensed. My nose collected her deceptive odor as well heightening the wine's appeal. A small sip later and I smirked. 'Her blood would be perfect with this.' It was perfectly smooth, not too sweet, and held a slightly sharp tang, which I liked. "Commendable" I told her, taking another sip.
Her smile held mischief. "Glad you like my family's wine."
I raised an eyebrow. "Really now?"
"Yep! Eldest brother runs a vineyard in France. Sends me a case every year. That's the last I have of that vintage." She happily sipped of her coffee like she had won a bet or something. I ignored her for the remainder of my glass and continued to do so with the second round.
I slight numbing entered my body when both of us returned to the car. Her wine had a high alcohol content after all. I decided to while away my boredom at her expense, and played up my level of intoxication. While she drove I leaned into her, whispering "Your blood is delicious my dear as is your wine."
Her left eyebrow rose. "Are you drunk?"
"Not nearly enough my dear." My left hand's fingers walked along the bucket seat mere inches from her leg.
"All right Count! Cut it out or so help me you won't like it!" Her threat didn't phase me. I grinned wide for her to see and twirled a right hand finger into her frizzy hair. "That's it!" She inhaled a great breath. "THIS IS THE SONG THAT NEVER ENDS! IT GOES ON AND ON…." Her voice was likened to a waling screech of a banshee. Like a compressed air explosion I yanked away from her to cover my ears. I could not believe the volume that human produced nor the duration she could sustain it. Baring my fangs I growled at her repeatedly. I also vowed to mutilate the author of that blasted song. I couldn't strangle the damn woman although I suppose it was my fault that I incited her in the first place. Know your limits when someone has power over you, and I realized too late I pushed too far with this bloody witch. For an hour she wouldn't stop.
I finally bellowed. "GOD, WOMAN! STOP ALREADY! I'LL BEHAVE!"
Marty stopped her torture. "Promise?"
I sighed. "Yes, I'll be the perfect gentleman, just don't ever sing like that or that sing again."
"Sweet!"
Leaning back in the seat I grumbled mentally in frustration. I needed something to rip apart. Unfortunately nothing presented itself. Not soon enough the eastern skies lighten with the rising sun. Marty pulled off to the side of the asphalt towards a lightly wooded area and parked her blue hunk of tin under a tree.
"Is there a cover for this… car?" I ask surly.
She twisted her waist to grab something out of the back seat. "I got something better! A blackout curtain! Just fold the seat back and wrap yourself in this and you'll be nice and cozy!
I muttered dully, "Lovely" grabbing the curtain from her. She turned around in her seat to reach in further for something else in the back. Her curvy butt wormed in the air brushing my arm. I couldn't wait for this degrading night to be over. She pulled out a one man tent then gracelessly exited the car. Popping the seat down and pulling over the curtain I grumbled, 'she must do this often if she's this prepared. Wonder how many hapless victims she's tortured.' I heard her talk once more. "Don't go touching that little box, and good day!" Turning my back to her was my response. The car door closed and I was left to my slumber.
"HOOOONNNNNKKKK!" I bolted upright, flinging the curtain off, ready to tear the intruder to shreds. "Wakey! Wakey!" She grinned grandly with an air horn in her hand.
My clawed hands dropped to my sides. "Oh, its just you."
"Yep! Good evening, count." Obviously, the woman was hyper, oh joy. "I already ate dinner so you don't have to wait." The car's suspension bounced as she jumped into the driver's seat. I threw the curtain into the back and crossed my arms. There was a small pop when she started the engine before she turned it back onto the road. "Did ya have a nice rest? I slept great; the birds in the air, the dragons in the sky, the sweet lullaby of horny toads…" She continued on with nonsense. I ignored the caffeinated woman to stare at the rising waxing crescent.
She tapped my shoulder. "Hey Count, wanna play a game?"
"And why would I play a game with you witch?"
She ignored my palpable annoyance. "I spy with my little eye something that begins with B!"
I remained silent.
"Nope, that's not it keep guessing!"
"I haven't said anything, nutcase."
Marty shook her head. "Nope, not it either!"
"Are you mentally challenged?" Her blathering irritated me to no end.
"Now it starts with a B. Ba.. BEE." She sounded it out as if I was child. "Remember?"
I exhaled through my fangs. Fine, I'll play her idiotic game. I didn't bother to look around as I could still sense my surroundings as far as she could see. "Is it a bat?"
"YEAH! now your turn!"
'Dumb game' " Can I pick the next game?"
Marty brightened even more, which I did not think was possible. "What game you have in mind, Vampy?"
"The quiet game."
"Oh." It lost that tiny bit of brightness. "I'm no good at that one, something else."
My eye visibly twitched.
She noticed. "You do an awful lot of that, something bothering you?"
"Yes, an insane woman," my mouth growled out. "Who can't be quiet."
A humored snort blew through her nose. "Yeah whatever. How about the alphabet game I start with one letter like anchovy and you start with the next...?"
Hissing lowly I said. "Blood-bath."
"Cauliflower"
"Dirt-nap"
"Elephant."
"Fatality"
"Gorgeous"
"Holocaust"
"Ingenious"
"Jugular"
"Kissable"
I growled. "Lead-bag"
Her eyes narrowed at that one but continued. "Modest"
"Neurotic."
She giggled. "Optimist"
"Please perish pestering prune!"
The woman's face lit up. "Quivering quirky quiet queen."
"Raining, ripping, rubbish!"
"Silly silks sliding softly!"
Damn woman was a word shark. "Time to torture traitorous tramps."
"UNDERWEAR!" She screamed it.
"Viciously vaulting vile vagrants very Violently." I expressed my ire fully in the last word.
My deadly tone didn't faze her an inch. "Womanly wiles wavering while weaving wet wicker."
"X marks your grave site, witch."
She scoffed. "You yuck yak."
"Zip it! No more idiocy, witch." I had enough.
"Ah… you were doing so well… fine…" Blessed silence filled the car once more.
Unfortunately, something else filled the car and I couldn't help a gag reflex. "My god, woman!"
The blood rushed to her face. "Oh, pardon me. Must be the kidney beans I had for dinner."
I hissed. This blimey female had to have a death wish if she was doing this on purpose. I simply stopped breathing. I didn't need the air.
A few minutes later I heard her pass gas. "Oh dear I'm paying for it now." My eye twitched in rage. I lifted an elbow and smashed the passenger window outward.
"Hey! You're paying for that!" She yelled at me.
Teeth grinded together. "It was worth it."
My nutcase driver mumbled under her breath. "With that attitude I wander if anyone likes you."
I told her quietly with hidden promise. "Most people I meet end up dead."
"Lovely." She stared at the endless road for many minutes brooding. I had hoped she would stay that way for the rest of the evening. Unfortunately, it seemed the fates were having a laugh at me tonight. Something seemed to have caught her eye and slammed on the brakes once more, and once more my head connected with something sharp. "Is that what I think it is?" She put her 'Bessie' in park and jumped out the car up a hill.
I pulled yet another degrading piece of junk out of my face and crushed it to dust in my fist and imagined it was that loony human I was doing it to. "This is so not worth my time."
I teleported beside the woman who was crouching among tall grass and white wild flowers. Occasionally she pulled at a flower ripping the whole root up. "What are you doing?"
"Sssshhhhh not so loud. you'll scare them." She dared shush me.
"Scare who?" I didn't bother to lower my tone.
"The fairies, sssshhh."
This woman was an absolute nutcase. The notion that she had escaped a sanitarium recently, entertained my mind for a second.
"Damn it!" She stood back up. "Ya scared em off creepy!" then marched back down to the car.
I phased right before her and grabbed the mass of smelly flowers. "And what prey tell are these for?" I knew for a fact what they were. Yet another thing the woman believed to annoy me with.
"Huh. Garlic doesn't effect you." She reached out to take them back. "I'll just use it in my-" I threw the whole bundle of them hundreds of feet away into the tall grass. "Hey! I had a nice fettuccine planned!" I teleported back into the car to wait for the half-brained gypsy. I huffed. 'And they call me insane.'
She finally hopped back in to do what I was paying her to do. She hummed randomly for the next hour until we hit a small town, Blairgowrie it was called. She mentioned she needed gas for her 'poor Bessie' and pulled into a small station with a mini-mart. I got out to find a phone, perhaps I could call master to send me a chopper or something faster than 'old Bessie'. That woman was going to crumble the last of my patience if something didn't change soon. Marty did her thing with the pump while I lumbered over to a payphone at the side of the mart. I picked up the handle to find to my great displeasure that it was detached half way down the cord. A crick occurred in the handle at such displeasure and slammed the useless thing back on the hook. I went into the store and spotted the cashier. "Excuse me," getting the human's attention, "Is there a ph-" Suddenly I was slammed down to the floor for no apparent reason but I sensed a touch of magic about it. 'Bloody woman!' I pulled myself back up.
"You okay sir?" The human male asked.
"I tripped. As I was saying, is there a phone I could borrow? The pay phone is busted."
"Yeah, let me get the manager. He's in back." He disappeared behind a narrow door.
I tapped my fingers on the counter waiting. The woman Marty had entered the store lightly singing idiotically about her stomach and the need to fill it. A light slap to the floor entered my ears just as half the store's lights went out. I heard an "oopsie" be muttered and my eye twitched. The woman was a damn menace to all. The light flickered back on just as the manager appeared behind the counter with a cordless phone.
"Ah yes, you needed to use the phone Mr…?"
"Brennan." I supplied smoothly, grabbing the phone and moving off away from human ears. I dialed and waited for my lovely master's voice to vibrate through.
"Yes?" Integra spoke.
"Hello, my Master." I couldn't help grinning.
"Alucard where the bloody hell are you!" Her yelling sweet music to my ears.
"A small town called Blairgowrie, near Dundee. I am currently on my way back, but it would be easier if I had better...transportation."
"What happen to the transport you had?"
"The freak blew him up."
I heard her sigh on the other end. "Fine, how are you moving now?"
"I've managed to barter for a short trip back to London, however the company is less than… desired." I was no longer smiling.
"I haven't anyone to spare at the moment. You can manage whatever company without a disembowelment until you arrive here, as long as you do get back here."
VIVIVIVIVIVIVI
B/N: Hahaha. I love Marty! That evil little gypsy! Oh and FYI I came up with the torment of "The Song that Never Ends". You may bow down and worship me now.
So he's stuck with Marty, who believe me, is intentionally pissing him off. You'll see why in a bit. MWAHAHAHAHA!
REVIEW IF YOU PLEASE!
