Perspectives of Crash

Perspective: Daniel

Just another day, another job to suffer though. I could see the looks they give me; a look of distrust...of disgust. They act like I am nothing but a liar; a thief out to steal their happiness and security. It's not fair, it's not fair, it's not fair. I am human, just like them, and a father to a precious little girl. I cannot be this person the world perceives me as. I must keep myself clean, to be a good father to Lara. That's not possible from behind bars, and certainly will not set a good example.

xxx

This door is not right. It's broken. I tell the man that, so he can stay safe. This store isn't much, but what else does he have? Why doesn't he understand? I keep telling him, but he's not listening, it's like he doesn't care. He's shouting and yelling and I don't understand. What does he want? You know what… I'm done. He can keep his money. If he gets robbed it's on him.

xxx

She's so scared of what might happen to us here. She's afraid of the violence, of the guns and the bullets that might hit her. I'm scared too. This isn't a fear that she will ever grow out of. Lara will grow up with this violence all around her; forced to hear the gunshots echoing through the alleys. I want a better life for my little girl, but it is something I cannot give her. The only thing I have to offer her is hope for the future. Maybe one day she will escape the bullets that chased her through her childhood, and make it into a nice life.

xxx

He's back. Why is he back? How does he know where I live? No no no this can't be happening. There's a gun. There's my daughter. Lara, no no please don't. Lara stay back. Please please please. He comes closer, I am going to die. I'm going to die and my daughter will see me. This isn't what I want for her. I try to stop the man. Is money what he wants? I hand it to him but he throws it away. I'm going to die, and there's nothing I can do about it. I hear the creak of a door, the patter of feet… The pull of a trigger happens too slowly, and the weight of my little girl jumping into my arms. The gun goes off with a deafening bang. I feel as if the world has landed on my lungs; the shock, the horror I feel is unimaginable. Suddenly I can't hear the world around me, the only thing I can think is "She's dead. She's dead." Lara was supposed to live, to move past this life. She was supposed to grow up, live a life a happiness. She's so young, please don't go. When I regain some of my sense, I notice I cannot feel blood; I can still hear a breath. I open my eyes and look down. She's alive, my god she's alive. A miracle, a blessing from God. I rush her inside, repeating "She's safe, she's safe" in my mind.

xxx

She's tucked in, safe and sound. She's with us; alive and well. I sit with her, just knowing I still can gives me happiness. I walk up and stare out the window, contemplating the last few hours. That man, that damn man nearly killed her. For what? Some stupid door? That I had blatantly told him needed to be replaced? He risked my little girl's life….

But then I stopped. Now is not the time for negativity. Tonight, I will forget about the troubles of life; all the oppression, and the death, and focus on the one light of the day; the miracle.

My daughter.