Not many knew it, except for his close friends at school, and that was as far as Peter was willing to go with his secret. M.J and Ned were good friends - friends he could trust with anything, and he wouldn't have to fear about it backfiring, nor would have to fear about anyone discovering what he was hiding through them.
For years, Peter always thought himself to be different. Infact, when he was alot younger, he was a she. When growing up, it wasn't about rainbows, unicorns and barbies - no, it was about racing cars, toy soldiers and football. That made him realize that he was different, but different wasn't always something bad. And Peter knew very well, that if a man is what he wanted to be, he should go through with it. And that left no room for doubts, there couldn't be any.
Aunt May, however, was not aware of this. She simply assumed that Zoe was a girl going through a phase, or prefered a style of clothing that wasn't as girly as most girls preferred it. Zoe was never one to wear skirts, dresses or skanky outfits - Zoe was always covered up in oversized t-shirts, vests and long, broad pants that were rather shaggy and loose. But this wasn't just something that would last a few months - this would last forever, at least the clothing style was something that remained permanent.
Peter was the name he had chosen, and he found it fitting, but Aunt May kept calling him Zoe on a daily basis, and he wasn't sure how to cope with that, because he felt his blood boiling at such points, and the body dysphoria that he experienced was getting worse, day by day. In school, he was known as Peter, but at home, he became Zoe again, and that was something he never looked forward to. Don't misunderstand, he loved his aunt, but he wasn't sure if he told her, that she would understand him. Truly understand him.
And ontop of that, he met Tony Stark - also known as Iron Man. Fortunately for Peter, Tony had never witnessed an occasion that Aunt May called him a her, and for Peter, he hoped that occasion would never happen. He was trying to keep the man from his house, and he succeeded for now. Ever since the day Tony was inside his house, he managed to uphold his entire 'male' identity, but at some point, he would have to come clean, to Stark, and to his aunt, and that moment was messing with his mind, because he feared he'd lose everything he had. But could he afford such consequences as he was Spider-man? He didn't want to find out.
The young man lied on his bed, staring at the ceiling as he just came home from school, and he had just eaten dinner with Aunt May. He just wasn't feeling right today, and he felt very uncomfortable. The ace bandages around his chest were tight, and they were practically pressuring his ribs and all underneath. It was a suffocating sensation, but he didn't want to take them off, because he'd see them again. He hated them. When he drifted into his thoughts, his phone rang for a moment, indicating he had received a message. So Peter leaned forth and grabbed his phone, opening the message and staring at the screen.
'Hey, kid. Come by the lab today, I've something interesting to show you. T.S.'
He swallowed. The internship he had with Stark was pleasant, and he was learning alot. Even after everything that happened, and not having accepted to join the Avengers, he still could go there from time to time to learn more. Truly, he was very grateful as Stark had the most advanced tech that one could possibly dream of, and Peter envied that. Eventually, Peter texted back after a few moments, nodding to himself.
'Alright, see you soon. P.P'
With the message sent, he grabbed his backpack with his spidey-suit, and moved downstairs. ''I'm going to M.J's, so I'll be home in a few hours, Aunt May!'' He stopped infront of the door, waiting for a response that came a few moments later. ''Alright, dear. Be home before ten, please.'' He nodded once again, pulled open the door and closed it after him. Fortunately, he didn't live that far away from Stark Tower - or the Avengers Tower - whichever was better now. He arrived about half an hour after and was let inside by JARVIS, Tony's personal AI that already opened the doors for the young man.
When he took the elevator down to the lab, he was greeted by Tony who already was busy with something. The genius seemed busy again, as always, and that didn't surprise Peter. Though, what surprised him, is when he walked inside and saw Tony smile, gesturing closer and motioning with his hand to a large screen infront of him, displaying a suit, and it was not that of Iron Man. It was the one of Peter. ''So, uh, how's everything, Mister Stark?'' Tony looked at the kid with some amusement as he shrugged lightly. ''I'm not hungry, so that's a plus.'' Peter stepped closer and looked at the screen, trying to decipher what he was seeing on it, since he gave Stark the sizes of his suit, which was made and adjusted for him, but it was so tight. So tight he could barely breathe in it. He wanted to tell Tony, but he felt ashamed, and if anything, he wasn't sure how he would respond.
Even in the past months, Peter felt different around his supposed mentor. Tony Stark was a respected man, a little rough around the edges, but he had his charm, and he was a kind man who always was ready to help and joke around. That's what Peter enjoyed. He was easy to get along with, if you could put aside how reckless he was at times, but without saying, that was a trait they both shared. ''This is my suit, right?'' The young man asked questionably as he gazed towards Tony who was moving his hands around and on the screen to zoom in on his suit and several parts of it. ''That's right. I've put everything I possibly could think of in your suit, but I've been told that your breathing becomes irregular when you've been in it for too long. Now, I tend to wonder why, since you gave me your size and I adjusted it. -But-, still 'Karen' keeps telling me you're struggling.'' Tony folded his arms, lifting a brow and eying Peter in anticipation for an answer.
Shit, is what Peter thought. He couldn't tell him. Not right now. He was preparing himself for the right moment, and this is definitely not the time to share such a thing. He gave Tony an awkward smile and looked aside, avoiding the man's gaze which was practically drilling into his skull. ''Well..'' He muttered, scratching the side of his head. ''Maybe..- Maybe I gave the wrong size..'' He cleared his throat, swallowing a lump that he hoped would disappear. He felt extremely nervous and he was trying to keep his cool infront of the man. Tony stared for a moment before he tapped the pen against his own lips and shook his head. ''That's funny. You want to know why?'' Peter shook his head as he looked down again, finding the floor suddenly fascinating. ''Because I have the feeling you're not telling me everything, Petey.''
Peter nervously laughed. Oh, no. ''W-why would I keep things from you, Mister Stark? Don't make such weird jokes..'' The genius might know more than he lets on, and Peter was feeling paranoid with that thought in his head. He couldn't possibly know. ''Call me Tony, first off. We had this talk before. And also, I don't know. Maybe because I have your medical file here..and your gender..'' Tony once again stared at Peter, and this time, he wasn't going to let it slip by.
''Ah..- that's funny.'' Peter laughed lowly as he started to look around, preparing himself for the best way to escape out of the lab, and hopefully, Stark Tower. He had to get out. He felt his heart pounding in his chest and the fact the ace bandages were adding extra pressure didn't make it any better on his shortage of breath. He started to rub his left arm, fiddling with the material of the brown jacket as he eyed the man again. ''Well..- I..'' He managed to say something, atleast, even if it was completely incoherent. Tony sighed in mild annoyance, placing the pen down on the table and moving towards Peter. He then placed both his hands on the boy's shoulders and looked at him with a rather serious expression. ''Look. I don't care about the 'what', or the 'who', but when it comes down to your health, you have to be completely honest to me, because I'm the one taking responsibility for you when something happens.''
Tony's voice was surprisingly calm, and soft, and that felt strange to Peter. He was trembling.
''...I'm sorry, Tony.'' He muttered out as he looked upto the man and then back to the side. ''I didn't want to tell you because I was afraid of what you might think of me..- but I suppose I should've known you'd get access to all my files..- I mean, you are Tony Stark..'' Tony gave the man a supportive squeeze in both his shoulders before he released him, but he stayed where he was, inside Peter's personal space. ''Yeah. You should've been honest with me from the get-go, kid. Not sure what's going on, but don't feel mandatory to tell me. But I need your proper sizes and I'll be doing the measuring myself this time.'' Peter nodded in defeat as he sighed out. ''I'm transgender, Tony.. - that means I'm -..'' Tony grinned for a moment as he eyed Peter over. ''You're trapped in the wrong body, and you're reluctant to tell anyone about it because you feel like they'd treat you differently. Believe me, Peter, I might be older and stuff, but that doesn't mean I've not been in situations like yours. You know, regarding the fact people might treat you differently.'' With that, Tony turned towards the screen again, gesturing to the suit's front. ''I'll add more space around your chest, and I'll add abit between the legs that'll make it more...manly. - Also, kiddo'. Are you wearing bandages or something underneath?''
What the hell was happening? Peter couldn't believe his ears and eyes as he stood there, eying Tony like he wasn't bothered by the fact he was transgender. He just took it as it came, and he even understood it. ''..I'm -..yeah, I'm wearing ace bandages..'' Tony paused as he glanced at Peter with some concern. ''Ay-yay-yay.'' He said in a tone that hinted that he knew that was the problem, and that it definitely ought to be painful. ''I'll get you proper binders..- and uh, I'll also get you started on the entire process of undergoing surgery and hormone injections. - which reminds me, you're underage, which also means that your Aunt would have to sign the paper for approval. I'm guessing she doesn't know?''
''No…- she doesn't. I -..I could -..maybe I can find a way around it..'' Peter mumbled as he moved his arms around himself, feeling cold all of a sudden as he thought of telling Aunt May. He had imagined alot of different scenarios in his head, and they weren't very positive.
''Oh, come on. Such a sweet old lady as herself? I'm pretty sure you can tell her anything.'' Tony said with a supportive smile, leaning against the table and looking over at Peter.
''Alright, babysteps. We'll begin with the suit and the binders. In time, we'll get the application and the 'talk'...'' He then picked up the pen again and pointed it at the screen once more. ''Now. I did say I have a surprise, and it's integrated into your suit. Frankly, we didn't have vibranium as Cap'n took it with him, so I've reinforced some parts with titanium. I think that's pretty much it.''
''Wooh! Thank you, mi- Tony!'' Peter lit up all of a sudden, smiling brightly. He wanted to ask about the Captain, but maybe right now it wasn't an ideal time. Not for either of them.
''All's good, Petey. Just know you can be honest with me. I don't judge - well, not mostly. How about you come by tomorrow and let me get your measures? I think you'll need some rest today. And it's also almost ten.'' Peter's eyes widened. Almost ten?! ''Shit! I gotta run! I'll text you, Tony! Thanks so much again! Bye!'' And with that, Peter ran out of the lab, out of the Tower, and back to his home.
Tony chuckled as he watched the kid run out. ''Jarvis?'' He said shortly after. ''Yes, sir?'' Tony glanced around his lab for a moment before nodding. ''Get me some shawarma. I'm hungry again.''
