A/N: Spoilers for Uncharted Territory and Heart Matters. Beta read by the awesome Argallel. Any mistakes left are purely mine.


"I kind of missed this." Connor spoke and Natalie raised her head.

"The sights or the freezing cold?" she asked, a slight smile playing on her lips. Connor exhaled loudly, watching the breath coming out of his mouth, then rubbed his hands together.

"I meant to say the crispy air and the wind in my hair, but now that you mention it, watching Chicago on a winter night from the rooftop is nice as well."

Connor walked over to Natalie. She was clutching a cup of coffee and leaning against the railing, watching the lights below. After a second of hesitation he too leaned over, rubbing his hands together. For a while they just stood there in silence.

"I'm sorry about Ted." Connor spoke after a moment and Natalie gave a small nod of acknowledgment. "There was nothing you could've done."

"Maybe I should've tried to convince him about the operation, instead of offering radiation," she said softly.

"No one could have anticipated Tumor Lysis Syndrome, never mind the effect it had on that mass. In the state he presented, he could've just as easily coded on my table during surgery. You did nothing wrong. Some people just... get a full hand of bad cards."

Natalie gave a slight nod, but couldn't shake the feeling that Ted would still be alive if she'd let Connor operate right away. She wasn't used to taking risks heedlessly and always tried to do best by the patient. Having to call the time of death on a 20 year old kid who just decided to turn his whole life over was horrifying. Seeing his father dejectedly walk away with a bag of clothes and a red folder, when only a few hours before he had a living son was heartbreaking. Natalie took a deep breath, trying to push away the tears that were threatening to come. Last night she cried herself to sleep, watching Owen sleeping in his crib and thinking about what she would do if... but no, she couldn't go there, not again. Not after Jeff.

"I think you handled the M&M well." Connor spoke and Natalie gave a sad chuckle. "No, really. I would've hit Stohl in the face probably after the second sentence. And that was before he even started with his stupid comments."

"Trust me, I was really close to hurling my pager at him the whole time... and Jeff too. The only thing stopping me was the thought that I might miss."

"That would be a shame," Connor said and Natalie shook her head, the already empty cup of coffee crunching in her hand. He could see her trembling and wasn't sure if it was from the cold or from the emotions she was feeling.

"I think I've missed this sight a bit more than the cold." He spoke suddenly, and Natalie looked at him, curious about the change of topic.

"Or maybe I just pushed out the memories of freezing fingers and the muddy snow and ice on the sidewalks. Though when it was constantly over 100°F in the summer, the thought of a Chicago winter sounded great."

Natalie wasn't sure where he was heading with this, if it was just a random attempt at making her think about something else or if there was something more to it. After a moment of deliberation she decided she didn't care. Right now, she needed to focus on something else.

"You never said... why Riyadh? Did you just feel like travelling halfway across the world to get a tan?"

Connor chuckled.

"I think I'd had enough tan from Guadalajara. No, Riyadh was... fate, I guess." He shrugged and looked at the city, suddenly wishing he had thought to bring a cup of coffee too so he had something to occupy his hands. Or maybe he wished they didn't start with Riyadh at all.

"I didn't mean to be nosy, Connor," she said, sensing his hesitation. Connor shook his head.

"Nah. I was already thinking about it before I came up here. Needed to clear my head a bit too."

"You went to Riyadh right after school?" Natalie asked after a moment.

"Well, not right after. Right after school I was offered a position at the hospital in Guadalajara. I was kind of... hesitant. I had some friends in the city, but most of them decided to return home after studies. I still needed to pay off my school loans... I had paid most of them by playing gigs at the pub after school and luckily the prices there aren't as sky high as in Chicago."

"Tell me about it. I think I'll finish paying off my student loan just in time to start paying for Owen's studies," Natalie said with a bitter smile. Connor smiled too, thankful that she didn't ask why he didn't use his inheritance or his father's money. That was a topic he'd rather not discuss anytime soon.

"Yeah, well. I was considering returning to the states, when I met Ali." He remembered the night at the bar when he was drinking with his buddies from school, a kind of farewell before most of them had to leave. They were playing pool and having a good time when they heard a ruckus coming from the other side of the pub. There was a group of older guys seemingly hassling a group of teenagers. Connor was puzzled as to why there were even teenagers at the pub in the middle of the night, when his musings were interrupted by a crash and a cry of pain and all hell broke loose. One of the kids apparently lost his cool and insulted the older guy in a way the man couldn't handle. The result was an empty bottle of beer being smashed over someone's head, a chair being thrown, and the rest Connor didn't see, because it was late, people were drunk and didn't need an invitation for a good fight. What he remembered was the end of it. Several people limping off, the rest running away at the sound of sirens. No one wanted to spend a night in a Mexican jail, and Connor and his friends also made a hasty retreat, using a back alley.

"I almost fell over the kid. He was slumped in the shadows, trying not to be sick. He had a nasty gash on his face, blood everywhere."

"You took him to the hospital?" Natalie asked, intrigued by the story, somehow having trouble imagining Connor just running away from such a situation.

"Nah. He didn't want a hospital. He was drunk and the last thing he wanted was for his father to find out about it. His friends had fled and mine were waiting around the corner, ready to bolt at any second. So I helped him up and took him to my place. Sewed him up as best I could, let him sleep off the alcohol. Turns out he was the son of Dr. Rashid, from Saudi Arabia. He just turned twenty-one and decided to go on a small tour around the world with a group of friends. I later found out he ditched a suite of bodyguards at the hotel. Man, they almost took my head off when I brought him there the next day." Connor had to smile at the memory, though when the elevator doors to Ali's apartment opened, the feeling of a gun being put to his head and Connor being smashed into the door was anything but funny. Luckily, Ali was quick enough to tell his bodyguards that Connor wasn't his kidnapper and was in fact someone that helped him out.

"So Ali was so grateful that he brought you to Riyadh with him?" Natalie was trying to figure out how one thing led to the other, clearly taken in by the story and Connor was happy to see she was thinking about something else than the last two days.

"Not exactly. Ali's father was already on his way to Mexico, because one of Ali's friends rushed straight back to the hotel and told the bodyguards what happened. Well, sans the alcohol that was involved. Of course, they went to the bar but couldn't find him, and the police weren't much help either. Though they found a witness who told them about some guy leading the kid away, all bloody and half unconscious."

"And kidnappings in Mexico are nothing new," Natalie added with a grimace. "You were lucky they didn't find you in your apartment with the kid passed out. I don't think they would've asked any questions."

"Yeah, I figured as much. Anyway, Dr. Rashid landed in Guadalajara about three hours after I brought Ali to his hotel room. Once the situation was explained, he thanked me and I left. I went straight home and crashed into bed. When I woke up, there was a dinner invitation under my door."

"Let me guess. Dr. Rashid was so impressed with your stitches he offered you a job?" Natalie said with a smile and Connor chuckled.

"It wasn't that fast. First there was a dinner, then several enquiries about me at the med school I attended, and at the hospital where I was offered the job. Of course, I only learned about that later. I was still deciding what to do with my future and having a renowned plastic surgeon from Saudi Arabia willing to talk to me about his work and experiences was rather... thrilling, I guess. The day before they were returning to Riyadh, he offered me a two year residency at the private hospital he was working at. The pay was more than generous... it would take care of all of my school loans within the first three months. Not to mention the experience I could gain."

"Still. Saudi Arabia is quite a distance from Chicago," Natalie pointed out, and Connor shrugged.

"I think that was just more of an incentive to me. There would be a whole ocean between me and my family, and a new culture to take in."

"So you took it."

"Not that night. I told him I had to think about it. So in two days time, I received a plane ticket to Riyadh, with an open date. A week later I was already scrubbing in to assist with an emergency finger reattachment."

Natalie gave him a look, then rubbed at her arms, suddenly feeling the cold penetrating through her thick jacket, but she didn't feel like returning inside yet. She needed to finish some paperwork, but her earlier plans with Jeff went out the window and she once again felt the anger of betrayal coursing through her. Next to her, Connor shivered a little, and looked ready to return to the warmth, but she wanted to keep him there a bit longer. She knew it was selfish, but being out there with Connor calmed her down a bit, and she wasn't ready to face Jeff yet, or worse, Stohl.

"It sounds like you got pretty lucky. Why did you return to Chicago?" she asked quickly when Connor straightened up. He hesitated, then gave a shrug.

"Riyadh was okay, I guess. Gave me a lot of experience and I must admit the occasional scooter ride out in the sand dunes with Ali and his friends was rather enjoyable. But... it's a different culture. And after a while, it was just too much."

Connor's face turned a bit darker at the memories he was reliving, and Natalie wondered what could've happened, but she wasn't about to pry. Connor appreciated she wasn't asking questions, thought he felt he owed her at least some explanation.

"I had a few... hard cases that didn't go the way I wanted. Not medically, but... there were different laws and different customs and the clients of the hospital I worked in weren't always your typical patient."

"The upper ten percent?" Natalie guessed and Connor nodded.

"There was a case with a pregnant woman that didn't end well. Her husband was a rich, entitled bastard. She was brought in with multiple lacerations caused by her falling through a glass door. The baby was okay, but she had cuts all over her face and hands... when she was falling, she was trying to protect her stomach."

"My god." Natalie sighed, her hands clenching into fists. She watched as Connor looked into the distance, lost in memories.

"There was a footprint shaped bruise on her back, where he kicked her into that door. The guy had the guts to tell Dr. Rashid he better make sure her face wasn't scarred, or he would have to get rid of her. I never wanted to hit someone so badly in my life."

"But you didn't," Natalie guessed. She didn't know what transpired, but if Connor had attacked the guy, he would probably either be dead or locked up in jail. Not working here with a recommendation from a prestigious private hospital.

"No, I didn't," Connor said with a grimace. "Though I still kind of wish that I had."

"That wouldn't have helped you."

"But it would've felt great," he added with a grin, and she chuckled.

"What happened to that woman?" Natalie asked after a moment. "Did she press charges?"

"She wouldn't even if she could. And she couldn't. When someone from the police stopped by, the husband told them he caught her emailing some other guy. He said the only reason he didn't kill her right away was because she was pregnant and it was supposed to be a boy."

Natalie felt sick to her stomach.

" Dr. Rashid took care of the lacerations and after another surgery, the scars would be barely visible. But... I don't know what happened after she gave birth. And just the idea that the hospital didn't push the issue of abuse, that the police just waved it off like it wasn't even worth mentioning... I realized that I couldn't stay. But I was getting tired of running too..."

"So here you are?"

"So here I am. It was time to come home."

"The prodigal son returns," Natalie said with small smile and Connor quirked his eyebrows.

"I think my father and sister might think a bit differently about that." he grinned, then shivered. "I don't know about you, but I'm already kind of freezing, and you were out here a lot longer than me. Come on, I doubt Sharon would be too happy if two of her doctors suffered hypothermia."

Natalie chuckled, suddenly feeling the coldness permeating her bones.

"I wouldn't want to do that to her. Just think about all the paperwork and higher insurance rates."

"Oh, the horror." Connor rolled his eyes and walked next to Natalie as she headed for the roof door, only pausing once they reached it.

"Thanks for... coming up, and for the talk," she said, and Connor tried to shrug it off.

"You know I enjoy the roof, I just wanted some air-"

"Come on now, Dr. Rhodes." she smiled. "I know your shift is already over. And it's not like you even brought a coffee with you. Just... thanks for the pep talk."

"Wasn't exactly a cheering one," Connor admitted with a grimace. But seeing the look on Natalie's face, he acquiesced.

"You're welcome," he said, and she gave him a light hug before heading inside. Thoughts about Ted and Jeff were still troubling her mind, but the fact that her colleague was willing to open up to her in such a way made her feel a bit more rooted. However messy her current life might seem, there were still people looking out for her, and that was reassuring in more ways than she could imagine.

The End