This is the third time you've done this and it gets better every time.

Rufioh's asleep, lying face down on your human bed. You're sitting at your desk, working on your music. As much as you want to be like Danny Zuko and Dallas Winston, you just can't sleep in that bed. It just doesn't work for you. You usually end up sleeping on the floor, making a pile of t-shirts and whatever else you can find and just crashing there. It's a hard life. Well... death. You're dead. But that doesn't mean you don't get tired, and that doesn't mean that Rufioh doesn't get tired.

But, even though you can't use the human bed for sleeping, you can use it for other things. It's way more fun to have sex on the bed than you (presume) it is anywhere else. Sure, the two of you have to make sure that you have a bucket nearby, but you only forgot the first time. You did have to dig out your collection of buckets, which you are proud to say is no longer dusty.

He wakes up then, yawning and pushing himself up onto all fours. Music forgotten, you watch as he stretches. You watch the lithe muscles of his arms and his shoulders and his back. When he twists, cracking his back and showing his chest for a few seconds, you don't think you can stand it. You scramble to get back on the bed in the fastest time possible and kiss him. He blinks.

"Hey..." he says. He adjusts himself so that he's sitting back on his heels, the blanket still twisted maddeningly around his waist. You're wearing nothing but a pair of boxers and he's wearing nothing at all except that stupid blanket. You really think that both the blanket and the boxers should just disappear. "Oh... did I stay over? Horuss is going to be freaking out..."

You grimace when you think of Horuss, but kiss him again anyway. He kisses you back, a little reluctantly at first. His hand slips around to the back of your neck, keeping your face close to his. Your hands tangle in the blankets as he kisses you again, and again, and again, and eventually your arms are wrapped around his neck and his are locked around your waist. He's just so good at kissing and it makes you weak, your entire body losing everything except a desire to touch Rufioh as much as you can.

He stops kissing you for a few moments. You make a noise of protest, pulling yourself up closer to him. You're basically on his lap now, legs hooked around him. You have to be careful about his wings, just like he has to be careful about your gills, but you've only had a few times where one of you has accidentally hurt the other. The time where the two of you were really getting into it and one of his teeth accidentally got caught in a gill on your neck, for example.

His arms are still around you and you can feel his heart beating fast, but he's not doing anything, just looking at you with a slightly contemplative look on his face. You decide to take matters into your own hands and kiss his neck, sloppily, adding tongue and teeth and everything you can think of.

"Wait, no... don't do that... he'll see..."

You sit up, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. You're still effectively trapped on his lap by his hands, but from what you can see he's not really in the mood for anything really fun. He's tired, maybe. "So, are you ever going to break up with him?" you ask. He grimaces.

"I've tried," he says. He pauses for a few moments before continuing. "He sweats too much... clogs his ears..."

"Okay, that's disgusting," you say. He shrugs. "Are we just going to have to wait until he finds us? Because, I don't know about you, but I'm pretty sure that if he finds us like this I'm going to be dead. Again. Like, seriously, he will murder me."

"You don't have to be doing this..." Rufioh mutters, kissing you quickly. It's a sweet kiss, a cute one that doesn't even have a hope of turning into anything more. "I mean, you're the one who brought up the idea..."

"I'm not complaining," you say. "I'm just mentioning the fact that I'm probably going to be in considerable physical pain one of these days. He probably won't even believe you wanted to. He'll probably just think it's all my fault, beat me into a pulp, and then walk off with you."

He sighs. "The sad thing is, I can see that happening. Maybe we should just... stop?"

Yeah, no, that's not going to happen. You shake your head. "I can deal with it," you say. "After all, I deal with Kurloz and Latula kicking my ass whenever I call out Mituna on being a shitty guy."

"Yeah... I guess..." he says. Wow, he's hot. He sighs. "Alright... but if Horuss murders you, don't say I didn't warn you."


my life revolves around writing pointless fanfics involving or implying cronus getting laid