This is inspired by a fanart I saw years ago, though I've taken creative liberties with the idea. Also, I binge-read a lot of Yoshizilla-Rhedosaurus fic while stoned, sooooo...
Princess Peach Has Diarrhea, by Dickfart
Peach, sensing a bob-omb explosion of a growl in her belly, evacuated the dinner table early one evening and ran to the nearest toilet. Once she was in the door a muddy geyser hammered against her clenched starfish, but she hadn't even gotten her garter belt off. Once she dropped her floral print panties and lifted her skirts, her pert little bare buttcheeks hit the seat at once. One painful cramp later she forced out a large, hard turd, followed by a second, slimy turd, followed by a chunky gravy spray with bullet farts.
She took a deep breath, the smell of rotten mushrooms and oily onions making her woozy. She placed a gloved hand over her face and winced, and with sweat and tears rolling down her face as her sphincter unleashed liquid hell, and once it was done she peed for awhile. Then a few more poo nuggets came out.
She clenched her belly, the pain sending lightning bolts straight to her brain. She burped once and gagged, and was nauseous all the while. A mighty wet fart sputtered from her like an old engine, an apt description when you consider that she's enveloped in fumes. Just because you can't see farts doesn't mean they're not there. The onion-jalapeƱo mushroom shit caused a mushroom cloud in the Toadstool bathroom that evening.
At once point, when the soft tissue spasms quit rippling through her, she wiped her ass and stood up. Before she could pull up her panties, an eruption of burning hell jolted through her. With only a millisecond to spare, her ass met the toilet once more and she sharted with a grunt.
"Ah! Ah!" Peach said, her nose was now running. "That wasn't such a good idea."
She must have sat there a good ten minutes longer, pushing and grunting with all her might, but not a single grain, or kernel of corn would come out. It was smelly, and Peach was exhausted. The spasms stopped again, so she took her time wiping, careful not to get any on her dress. She didn't make any sudden movements, just in case she triggered yet another movement. Get it?
Just as she was going to stand up and flush, Mario's head emerged from the depths of the toilet. Then the rest of him sprang up until he was standing upright in the toilet, with Peach's freshly shit-stained panties over his mustache. He was covered from head to toe in shit and soggy paper, and Peach's ass and skirts were now totally soiled because of his sudden appearance.
"I thought that brown pipe would take me to spaghetti," Mario explained, sighing wistfully while Peach just sat on his head in shock. Mario only thought of spaghetti and drooled. "Ah mama mia."
The audience laughed, the screen blacked out with a pop, and then the credits rolled.
DO THE MARIO
SWING YOUR ARMS FROM SIDE TO SIDE
COME ON IT'S TIME TO GO
DO THE MARIO
The End
