"On a scale of one to ten," Sirius began quietly.
"How screwed are you?" James replied, nursing his cup of tea and running a hand through his already-crumpled hair.
"Yeah."
"I'm going to give it a solid eleven, Padfoot," James finished dryly, and helped himself to another piece of toast.
Sirius grunted, and did the same. James looked bad, but Sirius, quite frankly, thought this was the hangover that was actually going to end his life. His brain felt foggy, he was sweating, and somehow the noise of the Great Hall at breakfast was simultaneously muffled and louder than it had ever been. He cursed himself inwardly for forgetting that he had run out of hangover tonic the weekend before.
The night before had been… eventful, to say the least. It was the first Quidditch match of the year, and Gryffindor had beaten Hufflepuff - the previous year's champions - so resoundingly that their captain, Amos Diggory, had cried. The match had been a slow starter, as both teams battled with the unseasonal fog that had rolled in from the Black Lake during the night and clung to the pitch. James had been winded by a bludger that had escaped Sirius' notice in the fog, and at one point the teams seemed to end up with keepers at the same end of the pitch. Fortunately, the second half saw the sun break through and burn off most of the fog, and the game picked up from there. Still, it had been another 90 minutes before the Gryffindor seeker, Marlene McKinnon, had got a handle on the snitch.
Of course, that was the same Marlene that Sirius had ended up kissing at the afterparty in the Gryffindor common room, pushing her against the wall in full sight of the whole house and, more importantly, Marlene's on-again-off-again-we're-not-talking-about-it boyfriend, Gideon Prewett, one of the Gryffindor chasers. The same Marlene that Sirius had been friends with, oh, since they were eleven, and who had always been pretty, sure, but who had never crossed the line into kissable. Not until last night, at any rate.
"Have you seen Prewett this morning?" came a voice from Sirius' right as Remus Lupin flung himself down and immediately grabbed for the pitcher of orange juice.
"Good morning to you, too, Remus," Sirius replied snidely. Remus raised an eyebrow, and Sirius sighed. "No, as it happens, I haven't seen him since I made out with his girlfriend last night."
"There was a lot of tongue. Lots of limbs. It was certainly… something," Remus finished awkwardly.
"That it most certainly was," James looked at Sirius. "Where did that come from, anyway? You've never been into Marlene."
"Do I look like I know where it came from?" Sirius replied.
"It had better not screw with the team; we were lucky yesterday with the conditions, and we can't be dealing with drama between you two when we're up against Ravenclaw next month."
Sirius held up his hands.
"I am very happy to never mention it again, trust me," he said.
"Where's Wormtail this morning?" Remus asked, as though suddenly remembering.
"Haven't the foggiest," Sirius replied briskly. Of the four Marauders, Peter and Sirius had the sort of personalities that grated on each other. Sure, Sirius loved him like a brother because he loved them all like brothers - more so than his own biological one, actually. But, Peter was like the annoying baby sibling of the group for Sirius; it's unlikely they'd have been friends without the other two gluing them together.
"Incoming," James said, nodding towards the door of the Great Hall and instinctively patting his hair in an attempt to neaten it.
The other two turned to see four girls enter the hall, laughing together, and making a beeline straight for their usual place at the Gryffindor table. That place being next to the Marauders, because that was where Lily Evans, Marlene McKinnon, Dorcas Meadows and Mary Macdonald had sat since the middle of sixth year when, by some miracle, Lily could stand being within a six foot radius of James Potter. Now the two were Head Boy and Girl, they couldn't avoid each other anymore, and the friendship between the two groups had solidified.
"How do they look so fresh?" Sirius growled. "My mouth tastes like something died in it. I think I might be about to die, actually."
Remus gave him a look out the corner of his eye, but said nothing as the girls approached the table.
"Good morning, you horrors," Mary said brightly, sliding onto the bench next to Remus.
"Morning," James replied, through a mouthful of egg.
"How fresh are we feeling this morning?"
"Not as fresh as you look, Mary," Sirius offered with a wink and a smile.
"Flirt," Mary grinned with a roll of her eyes. "Don't think that'll work on me like it did on Marlene last night."
Remus snorted into his glass of orange juice, and Marlene fixed him with a death stare.
"Black and I were very drunk," she said cooly, avoiding Sirius' gaze entirely. "It's never going to happen again."
"Must you wound me so when I'm so fragile, McKinnon?" Sirius feigned, clutching a hand to his chest.
The group laughed, and Marlene finally met his dark eyes with her blue ones. She gave him a smile, more relaxed now, and tutted.
"You'll live, I'm sure," she said drolly.
As she turned away to look at Lily, tossing her blonde hair over her shoulder, Sirius felt a flutter of something somewhere in his stomach. What the fuck, he thought, that's never happened before.
After they had finished breakfast, the group made their way slowly back to Gryffindor tower. It was a glorious September day, and they planned to collect their books in order to study by the lake to make the most of it. Sirius noticed Marlene at the back of the group, a slight frown creasing between her brows. He hung back to speak with her, ignoring James' raised eyebrows and slight smirk.
"Hey, McKinnon," he said, nudging her shoulder with his, drawing her from whatever had been consuming her thoughts.
"Please tell me you're not coming onto me again, Black," she replied with a grin.
"What, in case you kiss me again?" he said with a wink. She rolled her eyes, but couldn't hide the ghost of a smile on her lips.
"I think you kissed me, actually," she replied.
"Yeah, about that…" Sirius ran a hand through his hair sheepishly. "I hope I haven't fucked things up with Prewett for you."
Marlene waved a hand.
"No, we talked this morning. We were done anyway. On-again-off-again can only last so long, right? Guess we just needed a catalyst to finish it properly, I suppose," she shrugged.
"So, what you're saying," Sirius said slowly, "is that my kissing you was, in fact, doing you a major favour?"
Marlene laughed, and swatted him with the back of her hand.
"What I'm saying is that we're cool, Black."
"Good to know," Sirius replied, as they approached the Fat Lady and entered the common room.
"But," Marlene said, pausing at the foot of the stairs to the girls' dormitories, "if you ever pull a stunt like that again, I'll remove your balls from your body quicker that you can reach for your wand." She grinned lazily, her eyes fiery. "And that's not a euphemism."
"Have I ever told me how much you turn me on when you talk dirty, McKinnon?"
"Just keeping you on your toes," she called over her shoulder, ascending the stairs. Sirius watched her go, feeling again the frisson of excitement in his stomach. He couldn't quite wrap his head around it - it was Marlene McKinnon, for goodness sake. They'd been friends for a long time, never anything else. What's more, she was Sirius' match when it came to casual relationships and commitment-phobia; if there was one thing that could be relied upon, it was that.
Shaking his head at himself, Sirius began to climb the stairs to the dormitory, and resolved to blame it on the hangover.
