Authors Note: Aka: Backgound as to why I'm writing this story. Skip this part if you don't care for it!

So, My first character I play in games like these is nearly always a noble human woman who takes her life far too serious. She believes in nobilitys responsibility to watch over their people and has devoted her life to serve. To make it interesting I also make her ambitious.

Which in the case in the first Dragon age; she married Alistair and became queen. Or would have if I hadn't executed Loghain, refused Morrigan sex with Alistair and thus making him sacrifice himself in the end. Didn't quite work out as planned. No.

Thing is I always roleplay my character, making choices aligned with his or her personality. So after Solas COMPLETELY blind sided me and my Inquisitor really had no feelings at all towards Solas, I knew I had to have some outlet for the nosebleed feeling Solas gave me.

So. Here's Inquisitor Eliza, completely out of character, for my(and your) floating pleasure.


A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes

An alternative love story for Eliza Trevelyan

Herald of Andraste, Leader of the Inquisition.

The game had been going on for a while now. On days like these, days when I got home to Skyhold after dealing with something taxing, we usually played in silence.

Today we had come home with trophies. A Dragons skull and scales. The satisfied smirks on Dagna and Harrit when the items were delivered to the smithy was next to priceless. After spending an hour listening to Bull telling the story over and over, excited like a five year old kid on his birthday, I had almost decided to never kill a dragon again.

Though I would have to admit his excitement did reflect my own.

"Your turn." He says carefully. He doesn't want to disturb my thoughts. I smile and lean forward, analysing the board. My heart isn't in it today. Not because I'm tired, I'm air-headed. My thoughts are elsewhere.

I take a look up at him. Cullen Rotherford, former Knight-Captain of the Templars, currently the Commander of the Inquisition. And the man I've spent the last months of my life flirting with. He's looking down at my hands, or hand, I'm never really sure.

I like looking into his blue eyes, there is a calm reassurance there. Call me old fashioned, but the idea of coming home to a man in a big shiny armour with a large sharp sword is comforting to me.

Once there was a time when I was meant for the templars. My family is a religious sort, being born the second child I was meant for the Chantry. I showed an interest in weaponry from a young age and so they planned to devout me to the templars. Only my older brother died and suddenly I was the heir to the name.

This all happened when I was still pretty young. So my entire life I have lived with the notion that I was borne to serve. Serve the maker, serve the templars, serve the family name. It's nothing strange, it's part of my nature. Waking up in Haven, learning about the mark on my hand, the choice couldn't have been easier. My life belongs to the world, and for it I will lay down my life.

All this being true, it did turn certain things upside down… My engagement was quickly broken up. Or rather, I could suddenly do certain things the way I wanted to do them. And love had always been difficult to me. To be honest, the arranged marriage was sort of a relief. Let's just say I had my heart broken once, and my father yelling so loud the servants went into hiding is not something I wanted again.

But the Herald of Andraste very well couldn't have just any noble man as a betrothed? So I settled into the thought of keeping my love life dead an buried.

Cullen made that decision difficult. Meeting him every day, debating over the war table, seeing him with his troops. It lighted a spark inside my chest. Realizing he was looking at me in the same manner… I suppose it was inevitable. The Inquisitor and the Commander makes for a nice couple, doesn't it? I can almost read the title of Varric's next novel "Secret mission - Secret love" or something of the sort.

And I was happy. That tingling sort of happy that makes you stupid. I thought it silly that a woman like me, with the burdens on my shoulders, could have these sort of feelings.

Once Dorian called me a killer, when I objected he jokingly said "I'm just surprised you didn't kill anyone on your way here." He's right, of course. I do kill, a lot of people and demons. And I go home to my enormous fort in the middle of the mountains and have my heart flutter by a kiss from a man in armour.

But… well. This isn't why my head is off in the sky. The reason is… that feeling of a spark in your chest. The flutter of a heart. I just realised there is another man in Skyhold that has the same effect on me. It completely blind-sided me.

Let me tell you about it.


It was a day like any other. I came down from the study, having turned in the research items from the latest demons I had slain. Solas stood bent over his table, reading one of the many texts scattered over it. I was almost out of the room when I stopped and looked at the veilfire torch he had lighted by the wall. Curious, I turned and walked up to him.

"Solas." I called out and he straightened his back turning towards me.

"Greetings." He nodded.

"I'm interested in what you told me of yourself in your studies." I leaned my hip at the table. "If you have time I would like to hear more."

"You continue to surprise me." He gave a small approving smile. The same one he gives every time I keep asking questions about him and his journeys. I often get the feeling that he very rarely have these kind of conversations with other people. "Alright, let us talk... Preferably somewhere more interesting than this. Come." He nodded me along.

I don't know how he did it, I only remember walking out of the room, passing Varric standing by the fire. The next thing I know, I was in Haven. Everything restored. The snow falling lightly, the sun still shining through. Those were my favourite days there. The sun rays and the snow. We walked the steps up towards the keep. The town was empty, void of people and animals. There was a silence and the smell of winter. The rift circled in the sky. I know this wasn't real, how could it have been? But somehow I didn't register it. I just enjoyed the feeling of being there.

"Why here?" I asked when we got of the second flight of stairs.

"Haven is familiar." He said, gesturing with his hand over the grounds. "It will always be important to you." He kept walking towards the keep.

"We talked about that already." I reminded him. But he just smiled and kept walking, heading towards the keep, walking inside and down to the cellar level. Where the torches still burned, and the cells were still empty.

"I sat beside you while you slept." He stated suddenly, stopped and waited for me to catch up to him. "Studying the anchor."

"How long can it take to look at a mark on my hand?" I asked, knowing it wasn't that easy.

"A magical mark of unknown origins?" He turned towards me, appreciating my sarcasm. "Tied to a unique breach in the veil.. Longer than you might think." He said softly before turning to serious matter. "I ran every test I could imagine. Searched the fade, yet found nothing. Cassandra suspected duplicity. She threatened to have me executed as an apostate if I didn't produce results."

"Cassandra is like that with everyone." It was a true enough answer. I can't count the number of times she's asked me to get rid of Cole. Solas laughed at the comment. Knowing the truth of it.

We walked out again, taking in the calm of the place. I think I like it better bustling. Walking through the small town hearing a random prayer, an argument, a hammer to a veil and the horses neighing. The smell of fire, smoke and dinner.

"You were never going to wake up." He said, as a matter-of-fact. "How could you? Mortal sent physically through the fade. I was frustrated, frightened." He stopped and turned towards me, catching my eye. "The spirits I might have consulted had been driven away by the breach. Although I wished to help... I had no faith in Cassandra, or she in me. I was ready to flee."

I was dumbstruck. I wanted to point out the fact that there was a hole in the sky, where would he flee? But the only words that came out of my mouth was "But you stayed."

"I did." He nodded and turned towards the breach. "I told myself" He walked towards it and lashed out a hand. "One more attempt to seal the rifts... I tried and failed." His hand fell to his side again. "No normal magic would affect them." He kept looking at IT. That ominous green rift in the sky. "I watched the rifts expand and grow. Resigned myself to flee, and then..."

It felt like a flashback. The shock of him grabbing my hand and holding it up to a rift. The power surging and the rift being torn. When my power made itself known, thanks to him.

"It seems you hold the key to our salvation." He repeated, just like that day. He had turned and walked up to me again. Looking at me, into my eyes, not at my magical hand that held the mark that fascinated him so much. "You had sealed it with a gesture. And right then... I felt the whole world change."

It was a... rush of.. something. Somehow my mind latched on to it. The quiver of his voice, the honesty and excitement in his eyes. The choice of words.

"Felt the whole world change?" I heard my own voice as if spoken by another. It was softer than my own, calmer. Filled with something it hadn't held since I was sixteen and my father made the walls of our mansion shake with his voice.

"A figure of speech." He said kindly, smiling and tilting his head. As if the precise choice of words hadn't mattered.

"I'm aware of the metaphor." I challenged him, taking a couple of steps closer to him. Refusing to break eye contact. "I'm more interested in felt." He took half a step back.

"You change... everything." And he moved forward again, facing my challenge. Maybe realising what it meant. He must have seen it before. In his 'journeys'. Learned that the body language didn't differ much between humans and elves. Seen men and women... My eyes had broken off, for a moment or two we stood staring awkwardly at the ground.

"Sweet talker." I heard my own voice and I took that final step. Reached out for the face that was turning away from me, made a short eyecontact to know I was right. That it wasn't just me. It wasn't, was it?

I kissed him.

It felt like a theft. I surrendered to the the fluttering heart of a sixteen year old girl. I turned away, afraid my cheeks would flare. But his hand was on my arm. He turned me towards him, made the same eye contact. I recognised his face. It's trait of a smug self awareness.

I know you want me now. And now you're mine. Mine.

Sweet Andraste.

I know he's right.

My chest exploded of excitement, happiness. I couldn't breathe, but it didn't matter. My blood was rushing. And he folded me into his arms as he kissed me. I could only hold on to him, tighter.

When he broke the kiss I could barely open my eyes, I was feint. Feint!

The maker should see me now. His chosen one, brought to her knees by an elf. A dreamer.

Solas shook his head when I caught my breath and he kissed me again. My hand was against his cheek when he suddenly backed away. Shaking his head.

"We shouldn't. It isn't right. Not even here." But there is a longing in his eyes. And they don't let go of mine.

"What do you mean, even here?" Maybe I changed the subject because I realized I was scared, of what had just happened. I kissed him, he kissed me. No one of us wanted it any different. But I already had Cullen.

"Where do you think we were?" He asked, again with the smile. Knowing something no one else does. Self aware. Smug.

"This isn't real." I stated, looking around Haven. Of course. How could it be? We set an avalanche loose on it. Even if we would clear it out... everything would be broken, destroyed. I looked back at him.

"That's a matter of debate… Probably best discussed after you... wake up." He turned his voice to a whisper.

I shot up from sleep. Finding myself on my own bed. In my own room. Hearing the familiar sounds of Skyhold. A fire in the fireplace. The wind howling outside. Voices from the hall. Skyhold never sleeps. Not even at midnight.

And my heart was racing. Beating harder than when I was face to face with Corypheus. I held one hand over it and the other goes to my lips.

Andraste.

What do I make of this?


It isn't right.

The words are still echoing in my head. It isn't right. I haven't spoken to Solas about it yet. I brought him with me to the field as usual and we ended up facing a Dragon in Crestwood. But what exactly did he mean by his words? My relationship with Cullen? Because on that I would agree.

It isn't right. It isn't fair to him.

I can dismiss it all with the argument 'it was just a dream', can't I? Because we were in the Fade. It wasn't really real. But who would I be fooling? I'm still thinking about it. Still playing out the scenario in my head. By the maker, I'm falling asleep hoping to see his face in my dreams.

"I kissed Solas." It's like it just slips out. As if my subconscious can't handle it any more. What if Solas backs off? If he's not interested. Then I've effectively wasted my chances with Cullen. But it's as if that argument isn't valid.

"What?" His voice is sharp and he's completely motionless.

"I kissed Solas." I repeat, but this time look up at him, facing his blue eyes. Maker, I barely even knew he could make such a face.

"You said it was nothing." His voice is accusatory and he's still not moving.

I said what? Wait... I remember. He once pointed out to me that I spent a lot of time talking to Solas, and that I usually bring him along in the field. I had laughed it off then, hadn't I? Pointed out that his abilities were very helpful and the stories he told about the fade were very interesting. I had brought Dorian and Vivienne along a while after that.

"It was nothing." I acknowledge. Because at the the time it hadn't meant anything. Not for me. "But now it's something."

"And you kissed him? Just like that?" Finally he stands up and I can hear the anger in his voice.

"I suppose-"

"You suppose?"

I remain sitting, and he's using the height difference between us to make me feel small. Closing the short distance between us and looking down at me.

"What was it, an accident? You just happened to-" He fall silent and turns away with closed eyes. "I thought we... That you and I..."

"We were. Cullen I..." I sigh. "It's not logical. I know. I didn't even know I had feelings for him until the very last moments before... I'm not going to pain you with it. I'm sorry. I truly am." I'm still sitting, because I'm afraid my legs will fail me. It's not as if I don't have any feelings for Cullen. I do love him, one way or the other.

"I were wrong." Is all I hear him say before he walks away.

Not until it's completely silent, until I know that I'm alone, I exhale with closed eyes. Laying my face in my hands. He'll hate me for a time. Curse my existence. But he's a stable man, he will recover. With three large inhales I gather up the courage to stand. It's time to see what I've bought with Cullen's misery.


He's standing by the small table at the wall, looking down into some papers. It's a common sight in this room. There's a tremble in my soul but an ounce of pride makes me stop and remain by the door, fold my arms and lean back. Just looking at him. It takes a minute or two, during which I just continue to watch him. When Solas finally notice me he gives me a surprised:

"Inquisitor. I was-" He look back at the table and gesture at his papers before he changes his mind. "Do you have a moment?"

He's coming towards me and I decide to chance it and lead him to my own quarters. He follows and when we get into my room I let him lead the way. He chooses one of my balconies and I follow him out.

"What were you like?" He asks, turning around. "Before the anchor."

I raise my left hand in silence and study it. Thinking about the question. Also about how strangely… comfortable and natural it feels to be alone in his presence. Just like before.

When I don't answer he continues.

"Has it affected you? Changed you in any way? Your mind, your morals, your..." He shifts his weight from side to side and look away briefly before adding "Spirit."

"If it had do you really think I would have noticed?"

"No.. That's an excellent point."

"Why do you ask?" I lean against the reeling and watch him look away, into the valley below. This should be good.

"You show a wisdom I have not seen since…" He turns his eyes to me again. "Since my deepest journeys into the ancient memories of the Fade. You are not what I expected."

I want to laugh. I'm not what he expected. I think I let a feint smile creep upon my lips.

"Sorry to disappoint."

"It's not disappointing its-" He realize I was joking with him and starts over. "Most people are predictable. You have shown subtlety in your actions. A wisdom that goes against everything I've expected. Humans squabble over bits of land, they're short sighted and see only to their own gain."

"I wish I could argue. But you're right."

"Most people act with so little understanding of the world. But not you."

I suppose I could call him a sweet talker again and kiss him.

"So what does this mean, Solas?" There is silence for a while, before he finally gets to it.

"It means I have not forgotten the kiss."

I straighten up, slowly walk over to him. He matches the way I move. If i lean left, he follows. When I lean right, he follows. I'm not sure if he's aware of it. But I am. "Good." I chime and place my hands on my back and step up close to him. I'm going to have him make the first move this time. It's his initiative. Even though he does meet me first, he shakes his head and turns away.

No, I wont accept it. My heart screams at me, let go of your pride. I reach out for him.

"Don't go."

"It would be kinder in the long run." Kinder? To who? My grip on his arm tightens. "But loosing you would-"

Suddenly he's there. I barely even register the fact that he's turned around before his lips are on mine. His hands on my waist. I reach my arms around him, to pull him closer, and soon his complete embrace is a fact. He still tries to overpower me, pulling me closer and kissing me harder. It is as if he just can't get enough. And parting with his lips leaves a solid longing for something more.

"Ar lath, ma vhenan." He speaks softly before he turns to walk away. I follow to the door, leaning towards it, watching him walk away. Having a strong inclination to stop him and wrestle him to the floor.

"Solas." I call out and he stops to turn around, meeting my eyes.

I indulge myself by letting my eyes wander down his body, measuring him. Then I meet his eyes again. He smile, give a short chuckle then disappear down the stairs.


Second rant: As I said, Solas blindsided me. I didn't expect him to be so bold. He was a fluffy hippy with magics in my eyes. Silly tree-hugging elves, you know? It was after that "wake up" scene he changed a lot for me. Then I started thinking about his romance scenes, how I more and more thought that he would probably love the Inquisitor in that bold and daring manner. So I youtubed it.

Here I learned that Solas would only romance a female elf, PFFFT. Wel, at least I don't need to dwell on the fact that I chose the wrong romance. I barely remember the balcony scene with my human, and there are no videos up on it. So I pieced together what my memory told me with how he acted on the actual romance scene.

The break-up scene with Cullen is also inspired from the actual game ones. I had hoped he would've gotten angrier..

I don't know what's to come. These were the only scenes I dared to watch. I haven't finished the game yet, and I wont look at any more until I have. But I DO have some ideas. So I might write another chapter or two.

Thank you Bioware, for advanced tricky characters :3