Pr0fessi0nal
"I assure you, he is the best."
The two men sat across from each other in a dark and smoke-filled room. The shorter man, the one who had spoken, pushed a sheet of paper across the table. The taller man chomped on his cigar as he scanned the paper. The haze in the room became even thicker, if that was possible.
"Is that so? And who is he?"
"I don't know," admitted the shorter man. "All I know is, he's a member of the most elite group of assassins in the known world. There's only ten of them, and they're identified numerically rather than by name."
"I see." The tall man digested all of this while inhaling cigar smoke. "His record?"
"One hundred percent success rate," said the short man. "There is nobody as good as him."
"But you looked into someone else first, I believe?"
"Yes. Another of the group of ten. But he was not suitable."
"Oh? Why?"
"You know, of course, that a group of mercenaries known as the Vault Hunters recently liberated the border planet Pandora from the control of the multinational corporation Hyperion, and that one of these so-called Vault Hunters was the girl in question?" The tall man nodded mutely. "The first assassin I looked at, number zero, was another of those Vault Hunters. As such, he would likely be… acquainted with the girl and may be unwilling to carry out what you have in mind."
"I see. And this man?"
"This man is the next numerically in the group of ten. Assassin number one."
"I see." The tall man mulled this over in his head as he finished his cigar. "Well, our last attempt to take care of the girl was a disaster. We need a professional."
"This man is as professional as they come." Assuming he is a man, the short man continued in his head.
The tall man stubbed out his cigar and looked up from the paper.
"Get him."
The next day, in the same smoke filled room, the two men met again. This time, however, they were joined by a third man. He was tall, and dressed in a full-body stealth suit with the number 1 emblazoned on the front of it. He wore a black helmet, the angles and black glass of which made him look somewhat vicious. He was completely silent when he moved, and refused all offers of food, drink and cigars.
"Get to it," he said tersely.
"We would like you to kill somebody for us," blustered the small man, more than a little nervous in the presence of the universe's greatest killing machine. The assassin turned to look at him slowly, and there was a long pause.
"Obviously," said the assassin eventually, not bothering to conceal the contempt in his voice. The small man shrunk in his seat.
"The person we have in mind," picked up the tall man, "is an eighteen year old Vault Hunter by the name of Gaige. She is currently -"
"On Pandora," interrupted the assassin, knowing exactly who the tall man was talking about. "One of six. Killed Handsome Jack. Short, red hair, one metal arm. Killer robot as a pet." None of it was a question.
"That's her," said the tall man, impressed despite himself.
"Reason."
"Her robot killed my daughter."
"Desired manner of death."
"I don't care," said the tall man, "so long as she dies screaming."
The assassin nodded once. "Payment up front."
"I don't think -"
"Payment up front." This time the assassin had menace in his voice.
"Fine." The tall man counted out the money and pushed it across the table. The assassin swept it into his bag and stood up.
"It shall be done. I will report back when the objective is completed."
"If you could bring entertaining video footage of her death with you, I would appreciate it."
"Yes."
The tall man smiled, then stood up and extended a hand. "A pleasure to make your acquaintance, sir."
The assassin paused, then gripped the tall man's hand. "Call me '0ne'."
