A Conversation With Mr. Zurkon
By: M14Mouse
Summary: Ratchet has a conversation with Mr. Zurkon. Mr. Zurkon just wants to kill things. Everything is complicated.
Disclaimer: Don't own them.
Love bingo prompt: Serenade
"Why can't Mr. Zurkon not shoot little Fongoids?" Mr. Zurkon said as he hovered beside Ratchet. Ratchet sighed softly. Mr. Zurkon was a very useful weapon and most of the time, he was quite funny too especially when he serenading to him about dead little toasters and killing things all day long. He almost wanted to ask the guy at the weapons shop about how that got into his programming.
He just had this bad habit of trying to kill the wrong things…the key word is trying. Most of the time, he is able to talk Mr. Zurkon out of those weird impulses of his. Mr. Zurkon has a weird obsession about Fongoids. He really didn't like the Fongoids. He had this conversation every time he landed on the Fongoid planet.
Like now.
"Because they are trying to help us."
Mr. Zurkon titled his head.
Okay…they are kind of trying to help them. Most of the time, it has involved him rescuing them from their messes but they did help fix his ship with the Zoni.
They deserve some credit.
"They are."
"Mr. Zurkon is bored."
"Mr. Zurkon is avoiding the topic and stop it with the automatic responses…I know that you say other things," He said as he folded his arms.
"Why does Mr. Zurkon lack enemies to kill?"
"We aren't going anywhere until we make it clear that you aren't allowed to kill anyone expected the bad guys."
"Mr. Zurkon is ashamed." Mr. Zurkon said as he bowed his head.
He sighed softly as he put his hand on Mr. Zurkon's shoulder. Clank has totally been a bad influence on him. Once…a long time ago, before Clank, he would have ignored a robot's plea or emotional state. Now…he cared too much about it. That is why he is on this mission. Sure, he would love to see his parents again and save the universe again. But really? He was here to find his best friend and make sure that he was alright. Nothing else really mattered.
"Mr. Zurkon…you are a great weapon. I wouldn't be here if you weren't watching my back. You are fearless…."
"Flee before Mr. Zurkon!"
He won't laugh. He won't.
"That is very true. You are brave too."
"Death is too stupid for Mr. Zurkon!"
"Yes that too."
"Mr. Zurkon does not need bolts. His currency is pain!"
He burst out laughing. He couldn't help himself. The tension in his body snapped and drained from his body. He leaned over and laughed onto Mr. Zurkon's little body. He couldn't stop laughing. It took him awhile to stop. Finally, he realized he might be killing Mr. Zurkon. He moved away from the little robot. Mr. Zurkon just hovered in front of him with his glowing eyes looking at him. He wiped the tears from his eyes.
"That is good to know that I don't have to pay you. But Mr. Zurkon…no killing the Fongoids, okay?"
"Mr. Zurkon is inadequate for this mission…." Mr. Zurkon said.
He tilted his slightly and tried not to grin.
"Just kidding!"
"Good…now that we have come to an understanding. Lets go," He said as he turned around to approach the village. A Fongoid child ran passed them. He looked over his shoulder to watch Mr. Zurkon.
"Yoo-hoo, Fongoid! Your horns are stupid!"
"Mr. Zurkon…."
"I shall let you live little alien…."
He sighed.
"PSYCH! Mr. Zurkon lives only to kill!"
Finally, he turned around and gave him a look.
"Don't make me take you out of the weapon cycle."
If he didn't know any better…Mr. Zurkon was actually pouting at him.
He was going crazy. He couldn't wait to get Clank back.
End.
A/N: I plead the 5th. That is all. Read and Review if you wish.
