Recipient: Aya-Mi
Rating: PG-13
Pairing: ItaNaru
Word Count: ~2800
Warnings: Mpreg, one-sided SasuNaru (for Sasuke)
Summary: After a one-night stand, Naruto refuses to tell anyone who the father of his baby is.
Author's Notes: I'm considering a sequel to this... Aya-Mi was such a wonderful person to write for and I wish I had had more time to write a lengthier mpreg. SO SEQUEL. It will happen, pretty sure of it.

This was written for the 2012 ItaNaru Swap!

Bumps

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Naruto stared forlornly out of the window. He scratched his arm and sighed, looking up at the clouds and leaning his chin on the windowsill.

"You're not leaving until I get a proper answer," Tsunade replied, drumming her fingers on the table. She was sitting down, staring at Naruto with an eyebrow raised.

"You can't keep me in here until I die," Naruto replied, narrowing his eyes as Tsunade smiled. "You can't!"

"Then tell me who the father of your baby is," Tsunade shot back and Naruto clicked his teeth together and turned to look out of the window once again. If there was one thing he wasn't going to tell Tsunade, it was who the father of his child was.

"I can't remember," he said, shrugging and staring at a cloud that looked like a rabbit. If you squinted. And elongated it a little. And-okay so it wasn't much of a rabbit at all really.

"Well we know that's a lie," Tsunade muttered. Naruto ignored her. Yes, it was a lie, but if he hadn't been drinking in the first place then he wouldn't have ended up having a one night stand and then getting knocked up.

Not that he'd been so far gone that he couldn't have said no. And there was the issue of the Kyūbi's accelerated healing rate making it almost impossible for Naruto to become intoxicated…

"Unless you consumed the entire liquor collection of the entire village in a few hours, there is no way that you were drunk enough not to remember who you had sex with." Tsunade smiled wickedly. "Is it that shameful?"

"No," Naruto blurted out, turning around once more. "It's just…" he paused, screwing his nose up and looking back out the window again. It was a tiny thing, but he might just be able to squeeze through it-

"Well we can run a blood test when the baby's born then," Tsunade said and Naruto stiffened, turning to her slowly. "We'll have to run some tests anyway and a DNA test an easily be done."

"You wouldn't find a match. They were a nobody," Naruto said, crossing his arms over his chest and standing. "And because they were of no importance, a civilian I think, you won't find a match."

Naruto grinned smugly, but faltered at Tsunade's triumphant look. She stood, shorter than Naruto now, but just as every bit impressive as she'd been when he was thirteen. She poked his forehead lightly and Naruto fought the urge to run like hell.

"They're obviously a shinobi," she began. "You have a picky taste too, so they're likely to be dark haired and tall." Tsunade narrowed her eyes.

"It's not Sasuke, though that would have been the logical choice." Naruto swallowed thickly. Sasuke was the last person he wanted to think about right now. "While Sasuke looks as if he's besotted by you, you've been avoiding him since the war ended."

Tsunade cocked her head. "It would have to be someone you were comfortable with, yet not someone who is a friend. Someone who you can keep at arm's length yet still have a connection to."

She narrowed her eyes until they were practically closed. Naruto's lips remained sealed as she continued to scrutinise him. It was exactly twenty six seconds later that Tsunade made a noise of frustration and stalked back to her desk.

"Get out of here," she barked, shaking her head. "But I'll figure out who it was in the end."

Naruto ran, ignoring her vow. If he had his way, no one would discover who the father was, even the man in question. It wasn't because he was dangerous or would want to kill the child (in fact, Naruto knew it would be the opposite; the man would love his child so, so much). It wasn't because he was married and Naruto would cause a scandal.

No one could know because Naruto was afraid. As ridiculous as it sounded, Naruto didn't think he could put his heart on the line and ask the man to accept him and a child from the consequence of a drunken (well, okay, neither of them had actually been drunk) night. He didn't want to be the baggage that tied someone down and was then abandoned. Naruto couldn't do that to someone, even if it was selfish of him.

Even though he was a hero of the war, Naruto still found it hard to put faith in people other than his friends. Oh how he wanted to – especially with this man – but it was too much too soon. If Naruto had ever hoped for a relationship with him, launching in with a baby was not a very good place to start.

Checking the time as he passed a nearby shop, Naruto sighed and turned his feet towards one of the local restaurants. He'd promised to meet everyone there today so they could catch up with each other. Naruto was slightly dreading it as the meeting would be his first since he'd really started to show.

"Naruto!" two cheerful voices shouted as he entered. Naruto smiled at Ino and Sakura as they both stood, dragging him over to their booth.

"How are you feeling?" Ino gushed, staring straight at his belly. It was covered with his usual jacket and the bump was hidden at the moment, but if Ino and Sakura had their way, they'd undress him and coo over his bump until the evening.

(If it was a girl, they were going to teach her to destroy the world, Naruto thought, and he prayed for a boy for that fact. Naruto dreaded to think what any child would do under Sakura and Ino's tutelage, let alone one that carried the Uzumaki spirit inside of them.)

"Good, good," Naruto muttered, pushing Sakura off and crossing his legs. "Where's everyone else?" he said, suddenly aware that they were the only ones gathered.

"Running late," Ino said irritably, flicking her hair back and scooting around to the other side of the table. "Shikamaru and Chōji promised they would be here and Sakura said Sasuke was coming."

"Hinata, Kiba and Shino are on a mission," Sakura said. "I was hoping to ask Hinata a favour as well."

Naruto rolled his eyes. "Byakūgan cannot see the sex of a baby," he said and Sakura pinched his cheek.

"Not everything's about you Naruto!" she hissed, a little too quickly. Naruto knew he'd hit the nail dead on and chuckled.

"What about Lee, TenTen and Neji?" Naruto asked, grabbing a handful of savoury snacks off of the table. They were fillers, but he was starving.

"Neji's busy and Lee mentioned something about training with Gai-sensei," Sakura said, shuddering. She had good reason to; the last time Lee and Gai had trained together, they had run around the village gyrating. Good for stimulation, apparently, though Naruto didn't think they quite understood what kind of stimulation it was probably intended for.

"And I'm here!" someone said from the side of their booth. TenTen smiled and joined Ino, setting her drink down and sighing. "I'm tired and it's only lunchtime," she moaned and they all nodded in agreement.

Shikamaru and Choji drifted in a few seconds later and pleasantries were exchanged. No one mentioned Naruto and his pregnancy, but it didn't bother Naruto. He was happy to keep it low-key until he was literally pushing the kid out, at least as far as conversing about it with his friends was concerned. Nothing against them, but they didn't need to know about his sexual escapades and screw ups.

"Sorry I'm late," a new voice said and Naruto shuffled down the bench so that Sasuke could join them. "I had to prepare for Nii-san's return."

Naruto looked down and grabbed another lot of meat to cook. Sasuke was the last person he wanted to see right now and the rest of the group seemed to share the sentiment. While no one had been completely welcoming since Sasuke had returned to Konoha after the war, Naruto had, surprisingly, been the one to keep most distance.

"Itachi-san's returned?" Sakura asked, looking around Naruto and Shikamaru to Sasuke. "I thought he was gone for a few more weeks."

Sasuke shook his head. "He was able to finish the mission early. He's with Tsunade-sama right now."

Sakura nodded in understanding and shot a look at Naruto. She bumped shoulder with him and spoke quickly.

"Looks like everything is about to get a little messy," she said and Naruto rolled his eyes.

Sakura was the only one who knew the truth. The morning after he'd slept with freshly-pardoned Uchiha Itachi, Naruto had one straight to Sakura's and sat on the corner of her bed, shaking his head for twenty minutes.

Naturally, Sakura had been the one to recognise the signs of pregnancy and had been able to put two and two together.

"Messy?" Choji asked and Sakura froze slightly.

"Yeah, messy," Naruto replied with a grin, turning to Sasuke. "I'm not going to let anyone beat the amount I'll eat!"

Naruto felt Sakura relax as his diversion worked. He felt Sasuke's eyes linger a moment too long, but he then turned away and Naruto relaxed.

"So," TenTen said when the food had vanished and the conversation reached a comfortable pause. "Any ideas for names yet?"

Naruto shook his head. "Nope. I'm terrible at naming things so I'll probably just name it 'Baby' until it's born."

TenTen shook her head. "Just make sure you do give it a name," she said, smiling to show she was joking. "I have to go now," she excused herself, thanking them all and making promises to meet again sooner.

The group trickled out, Naruto linking arms with Sakura. Sasuke trailed behind them, still a part of their team. Though Naruto might have been avoiding Sasuke, he still loved his best friend. It was just a little… awkward right now.

"I have to go," Sakura said, turning to Sasuke and smiling at him. "I'll have to make sure that Sai hasn't done any damage at the hospital with that filthy mouth of his."

"Ahh," Naruto said. "I should visit him tomorrow. Tell him I'll drop by and if he wants anything then just send me a mouse or something."

Sakura promised she'd pass the message onto the temporarily-out-of-action member of their team and vanished into the afternoon. It left Naruto with Sasuke, but there was none of the odd air Naruto had been expecting.

"I want to talk to you about something," Sasuke said suddenly and Naruto looked at him in slight surprise. Sasuke hadn't been forthcoming like this for a very long time and Naruto's stomach churned slightly.

"Sure," he said weakly, giving a small laugh. "Anything for my best friend!"

As anticipated, Sasuke wilted a little under the words 'best friend'. Naruto took a deep breath and followed Sasuke as he turned away from the restaurant, leading them to the house he shared with Itachi.

At least Itachi wasn't home yet. It would be a little more uncomfortable if he had been.

While the house was small, it was comfortable and lived in. It looked like a happy place, a far cry from the Uchiha clan of the past. Sasuke and Itachi had accepted their faults and their truths and, finally, the bloody past of the Uchiha clan had been put to rest.

"This may seem out of the blue," Sasuke began, after they'd sat down and Naruto declined a glass of water. "But… well..."

Naruto shifted uncomfortable. He wasn't happy with Sasuke's behaviour at the moment, but there were things that needed to be said. Sasuke needed to say how he was feeling and Naruto needed to listen.

"I like you. I mean I think I like you." Sasuke frowned and looked down at the floor. "Or rather, I want the opportunity to like you."

Naruto didn't know what to say. This was what he'd been afraid of since Sasuke had come back to Konoha, but he'd never thought it would actually happen. Sasuke didn't feel anything more than friendship, not really, but he wanted to stay with Naruto and so assumed he needed to love him to do so.

"You don't need to," Naruto said softly, smiling. "You'll always be my best friend."

Sasuke's eyes hardened. "I'm serious, Naruto," he said and Naruto's smile fell. He didn't want to crush Sasuke and turn him away, but there was no way he was getting into a relationship with him.

"I'm not in the right position," Naruto said. He really wasn't. There was only one person he'd accept in a relationship, but saying that would just antagonise Sasuke.

"If it's about the baby, then I'll help you care for it. I've always wanted to be a father and even if it's not of my blood, I can love it." Naruto winced. Sasuke was hitting a little too close to home now and he had no idea. "I know we're both young, but you shouldn't reject me just because of a baby."

"A baby?" a voice asked and Naruto froze. Sasuke's head jerked up too, but he relaxed when he saw who it was.

"I would think you'd want a few more years out in the field before having a baby, Sasuke," Itachi commented, moving through the room as though Naruto wasn't there. He looked as though he'd been asleep and Naruto felt a stab of guilt. Had they woken him up?

"You're not the only one who's entitled to do what they want." Sasuke sounded like a spoilt child and Naruto shrank back a little, wondering if he could escape to the door without Sasuke and Itachi realising.

"I know," Itachi said softly, covering a yawn with his hand. He blinked and then locked eyes with Naruto. "Forgive my manners," he said and smiled charmingly, melting Naruto from the inside out.

Damn Itachi. Using the same smile that Naruto had jumped into bed for. Never mind that Naruto had dragged Itachi very willingly with him and the blame was shared.

"How are you Naruto?" Itachi asked, seemingly polite and friendly. Naruto could see him though. He could see how Itachi was looking between him and Sasuke, trying to judge what was going on between them and where the baby factored in.

Sasuke shifted uncomfortably as Naruto stood up. He was suddenly feeling a little bold and a little reckless. Not a good combination, but one that Naruto was famous for.

"Pregnant," he blurted out. "But still good."

Itachi's eyebrows shot upwards and his head snapped to look at Sasuke.

"I'm not the father," Sasuke retorted. "I forgot you left just before Naruto found out."

Itachi, like Sakura, was also able to put two and two together. He turned to Naruto, looking wide awake and shocked.

"Naruto?" he asked quietly and Naruto nodded. Itachi moved to a chair and sat down slowly, not taking his eyes off of Naruto for a moment.

"Nii-san?" Sasuke asked, glancing between them. For a moment, he seemed confused, but the confusion faded and realisation settled.

"Oh," Sasuke said awkwardly, summing up everything that Naruto felt. His body jerked as if he wanted to say something else, but just sighed instead.

"Let's hope you were right," Sasuke said before he left. "You'll always be my best friend," he repeated the words Naruto had said earlier and they fell comfortingly on Naruto's shoulders. He and Sasuke would figure out their friendship later; Naruto had to deal with Itachi right now.

"Were you planning on telling me?" Itachi said quietly, hair hanging over his face.

Naruto didn't reply. Was he ever going to tell Itachi? Yes. Was he going to tell him before he absolutely had to? No.

"It was just one night," Naruto said, shrugging. "You're not carrying the thing so why should it weigh you down too?"

Itachi looked at him and Naruto was taken aback by the fury in his eyes.

"Don't speak of our child in that way," he said, voice brimming with emotion. "I know you're only saying it because you think I won't care, but I do."

Itachi stood and walked until he stood before Naruto. He dropped to his knees, wrapping his arms around Naruto tightly and pulling him close.

"Why wouldn't I want you?" he whispered and Naruto felt his heart flutter in excitement. "Why wouldn't I want you and our child?"

Tension seeped from Naruto's muscles and he leant against Itachi, holding him tightly. The bump pressed against Itachi and Naruto felt him look down.

"Can I…?" he asked and Naruto nodded, pulling back a little to watch as Itachi unzipped his jacket and placed a shaking hand over his enlarged belly.

"Naruto," Itachi said softly, voice awed. "Naruto, look."

"I know," Naruto said laughing. "I know."

Itachi looked at him then with so much love that Naruto wondered how he had missed it before. It hadn't been a coincidence that they'd had sex that night and Naruto had simply been running for irrational fears.

Itachi would love him and their baby. Just as Naruto would love Itachi and their baby in return.

They had fought heard for their peace and Naruto could think of no better two people to share his future with than Itachi and their child.