Notes: for the trope-bingo square: meet the parents/family. Title of the story from the poem The B-List Just Threw a Party in Your Honor! By Miranda Dennis. Thank you A, all mistakes mine.

October 2006:

"I could drive," Pacey said.

"You mean you don't want me to drive," Joey said. "But see, I never get to drive, not for the last year, so frankly, since I enjoy driving, I am going to drive."

She didn't add that he seemed emotionally unstable, understandably so, and she trusted herself better behind the wheel.

So understandably so. Joey gritted her teeth in anger at Mrs. Witter for the hundredth time in the last two hours. She hadn't had the highest opinion of Pacey's mom, and she'd worked hard to make sure to say only nice things at the funeral six weeks ago, but this latest act was just cruel. Who does that, she thought. What kind of awful monster arranges to have letters sent after they're dead to let their own son know his dad is not biological father? Pacey's mom, apparently. She was that kind of monster. The same letter had noted that Pacey's dad and his biological father had also gotten letters. Just to make sure they had their feelings hurt, too, Joey thought.

She must have grumbled, because Pacey said, "You're still angry at my mom, huh."

"Two hours isn't long enough for me to get over it," Joey said.

Pacey sighed and said, "He probably always knew, subconsciously. That's why."

"I don't think so, Pacey," Joey said. "And your dad always loved you. He was just bad at expressing it."

"Well, now he knows for sure, so I guess he doesn't have to pretend," Pacey said.

"Pacey," Joey said. "Your dad has not been pretending he loves you. He's made a real effort since you were 16 to be a better father and show he appreciates you. He co-signed your loan."

"Oh, god, what if he takes it back? Fuck," Pacey said.

"Stop it, he's not taking back the loan. He technically can't, you know," Joey said.

"He can ask me to pay him back for what he's invested," Pacey said.

"He won't," Joey said.

"I wish I could be as optimistic as you're being but I've known him my whole life, and I don't know," Pacey said.

She glanced over and his eyes were red and wet. Joey thought a string of curses in the general direction she thought Mrs. Witter would have ended up. She said, "Well, I think you're wrong. And I've known him a pretty long time. He helped you out when you lost all that money, he paid for you to go to culinary school, he co-signed that loan for you. He loves you."

"He knows he doesn't have to now," Pacey said.

"Yes, he does," Joey said. "This is why I said we had to drive up. If you see him in person, even you will have to accept your dad loves you."

Pacey sighed again. Then he said, "You know, as I was reading the letter the first time, I just kept thinking, please don't let my real dad be Mr. Potter."

"EWWWW," Joey said. "Oh, god, that would have been so gross. Also, Mr. Witter is your real dad."

"We live too far north for me to have spent my senior year having sex with my sister," Pacey said.

"I don't know that that's true but I'm grateful you're not a blood relative," Joey said.

Then they were in Capeside and Joey drove Pacey home. Pacey's dad came outside, glaring at his phone and then looking up at them. Pacey got out of the car but just stood there by the car door.

Chief Witter said, "This is why you didn't answer your phone, you wanted to do this in person."

Joey crossed her arms across her chest. Surely this was going to be okay. It had to be.

"Yeah," Pacey said, looking miserable.

"I knew you would think this," Chief Witter said. He walked over to where Pacey was standing. "It's my fault you're thinking like this, but Pace, you don't have to worry, I love you, son." He hugged Pacey hard. Joey exhaled. She knew it would be okay.

"But maybe you sensed it," Pacey mumbled.

"I didn't, kid," Chief Witter said. "I just didn't do very well for you. Okay?"

"And he's not making you pay him back for the restaurant," Joey said.

"Christ, no," Chief Witter said. "Pacey, let's go inside, okay?"

"Sure," Pacey said.

"I'm going to go say hi to Bessie," Jo said. "Call me when you're ready to go back."

"You're taking my car," Pacey said, almost smiling.

"You still have your phone," she said.

"Thanks, Joey," Chief Witter said.

Bessie set out snacks for the two of them. "I'm pregnant, I'm starving," Bessie said.

"I work in Manhattan so I have no money," Joey said. "Please feed me."

Joey was only capable of keeping Pacey's secret for so long. Besides, Bessie wouldn't say anything, she liked Pacey. "She sent a letter?"

"From the grave," Joey said. "Or lower down. Yeah, it was part of her will. She wanted to make sure Pacey and his dad and the guy she cheated with all knew."

"Thank god it wasn't Dad," Bessie said.

"That's what Pacey said," Joey said.

"But only Pacey is not a Witter," Bessie said.

"He's a Witter, Bessie," Joey said. "Yeah, I think Mrs. Witter would have thrown that in if she was doing that to more than one kid."

"Who is the biological father? I don't think I've seen anyone walking around where I'd be like, well, doesn't he look like Pacey," Bessie said.

"I barely remember the name," Joey said. "I wonder if the guy's still alive. I wonder if he'll try to meet Pacey."

"I think I would want to meet him at least once," Bessie said. "Just to make sure I know the names of all his children, you know?"

"Good point," Joey said.

"Funny that Pacey called you," Bessie said, smiling.

"Who else does he have to call in New York?"

"Jen," Bessie said. "Everyone he works with, his other ex-girlfriends -"

"But I've known him long enough to know everyone involved," Joey said.

"You two should get back together," Bessie said.

"Why do you assume he's single?"

"Because he didn't call his girlfriend, he called you," Bessie said. "Why not get back together, you two are good together."

"It's been years, Bessie," Joey said.

"Yeah, years since you dumped Pacey for that guy, ugh, what was that jerk's name?"

"Eddie," Joey said. "Why do you think he was a jerk?"

"After he met Dad, he literally disappeared without a forwarding address or even telling you. Or whatever stupid reason he gave you. He was a jerk, too. Bodie didn't like him either," Bessie said.

"Now you're all on the Pacey train," Joey said.

"He's here four days a week running the Icehouse, we know him. We like him," Bessie said. "Before he had his own apartment here, we'd let him stay with us and he was a very courteous guest. Alexander loves him."

The three days a week the Icehouse was closed, Pacey drove down to New York City and worked at a popular lunch restaurant in Manhattan. Joey didn't make enough to eat there regularly.

"You should date him," Joey said.

"He's not in love with me," Bessie said, getting up. Joey turned to look out the windows and noticed outside was pitch black.

"Is there a storm?"

"Yeah," Bessie said. There was a crack of lightning and a loud burst of thunder. "That was close. You can take the couch and drive back in the morning."

Pacey called at that moment. He said, "We're not going back tonight."

"Nope," she said. Pacey said if she came out to the Icehouse, he had a room in the back where she could sleep.

Bessie said, "Go, go, I forgot, the couch is occupied."

"You're the worst," Joey said.

She made it to the restaurant before the worst of the storm hit. Pacey looked much better than he had that morning. She said, "Why not stay in house?"

"I'm good," he said. "I want to make sure all the windows here are boarded so I don't lose everything if the storm gets bad."

She helped him board the windows, carefully not asking questions. Finally he said, "Jo, seriously, just ask me."

"I don't have any questions, I know your dad loves you. You were the one with doubts," Joey said.

"I had every right to doubt," Pacey said. "But you're right. You were right. We had a nice talk."

"Are you going to tell anyone else?"

"I don't know," Pacey said. "He said it was up to me to tell anyone. I wonder if there's a card I could just send everyone - hey. guess what? You won't believe this!"

"You don't have to," Joey said.

"Yeah, but, you know, Doug told me he was gay a few months before he came out and it feels unfair to hide something from him when he didn't with me," Pacey said.

"He kinda did hide it from you for years," Joey said. They had finished boarding the windows and headed upstairs to Pacey's apartment.

Pacey said, "He was hiding it from himself, though. So I'm gonna tell him and then if I tell him, I can't not tell Gretchen, and then I can't make them hide it from Kerry and Paula. Plus you know, so Bessie knows, so it's mean not to tell Dawson and Jack and Jen and possibly Audrey and maybe Danny."

"Naturally," Joey said. "I swore Bessie to secrecy, though."

Pacey smiled.

There was only the one bed, of course. She said, "Are we going to have that fight that people always have about sharing the bed and not sharing the bed and you try to be a gentleman and I say no no, don't sleep on the floor?"

"I figured we'd share the bed," Pacey said. "I know it'll be hard for you to restrain yourself, but think of me a wounded puppy. It would be wrong to take advantage of me." He made an exaggerated sad face.

"So you want me to jump you?"

Pacey laughed. "I always want you to do that, but don't feel like you have to."

"I'm not going to," she said, seriously. "Because it feels like we're standing in earthquake territory and one just hit, you know? Nothing happens until we have steady feet."

"That's almost poetic," Pacey said. "Or very confusing. Why aren't you on steady feet, Jo?"

"I'm fine," she said, turning away from him on the bed. It was a long time since she'd seen Pacey vulnerable, something other than the wisecracking hardworking chef about two towns. He'd been a mess at the funeral, but that seemed to fall to Dawson to deal with as the one who knew about losing a parent as an adult.

"You know what it is, Jen?" Three days later, she sat in Jen's apartment's tiny dining area. "Really, ever since our last break up, I don't remember seeing Pacey like that. Vulnerable."

"When you dumped him, you mean?" Jen sipped her coffee.

"Sure, you could say that," Joey said, and then stuck out her tongue. "I'm pretty sure he's forgiven me, how about everyone else lay off things I did when I was all of 20 years old?"

Jen shrugged. "I would, but having dated Pacey since then, it makes even less sense to me than it did the first time."

"Oh, you dated. Okay, so it wasn't 'we're friends but we have sex,' 'we're close friends but we have a lot of sex,' 'we're very close friends and we only have sex with each other' - cause I think that's one of the ways you described it. We all got a lecture if we dared say dating," Joey said, smiling.

"Okay," Jen said, blushing. "Fine, but I think we should both be forgiven for our idiocy at age 21."

Joey laughed. "Just this once. Look, that's kinda what I mean. There's a certainty to people, we expect there is a certainty. It's been years since I saw Pacey like that, the low self-esteem, all of that. I felt like I was back in high school again."

Jen nodded. "Except for the funeral, I've never seen Pacey cry. See, this is why we never said we were dating, it was really just sex and being friends and having fun."

"It's not like Pacey is some tin man when it comes to his friends, not the close ones," Joey said.

"Nothing like that happened when we were, whatever we were," Jen said. "But given the quality of the sex, I have to return to my previous point, who dumps Pacey for what's his face?"

"How do you know he wasn't great in bed, too?"

Jen raised an eyebrow at her. "I saw him. I saw Eddie whining about not getting laid, like he thought you should put out. As opposed to Pacey who waited nine months before you two had sex."

"Two different situations," Joey said. "Okay, I don't know why I'm defending him. If I could go back in time, I wouldn't dump Pacey. I would talk more. I would admit my absolute fear when I dated him, because that wasn't a relationship that I could ever just, just walk away from."

"Except where you did," Jen said.

"Wow, can we get back to my current issue?"

"No," Jen said. "You broke his heart. He talked about it, like, joking but not really, two years later when we were whatevering. Now that you're talking about Pacey again in a kind of way, I think you should be sure you're not going to do it again."

"That's something I can absolutely guarantee," Joey said, rolling her eyes.

"Obviously you didn't just break up with someone who might show up and want you back, and I assume you wouldn't take Eddie back if he showed up -"

"Of course not," Joey said. "Did you know when he got to California and was at his school, he started dating a high school senior? 26, dating a 17 year old, that's gross," Joey said.

"But you just said dumping Pacey was as much about your fear as anything else, so are you still scared?"

Joey stood up and put her mug in the sink after rinsing it out. "Why are you doing something as dull as art galleries instead of counseling, Jen?"

"Oh, no, no, we're not talking about my fear," Jen said.

"Next week we're going to, though," Joey said. She looked at Jen seriously until Jen nodded.

Joey took the train to Capeside two weeks after she'd driven down with Pacey. She went to the Ice House that Saturday morning, before they opened apparently. Something she figured out after she'd walked all the way over. She walked around to the back and found Pacey leaning against the wall, smoking a cigarette.

"Smoking is wrong," she said.

"I know," he said. "You're totally right. I'm quitting next week."

She followed him and sat in the kitchen while he prepped for breakfast. "Are you doing this all yourself?"

He smiled at her. "Right now, yes. The breakfast crowd doesn't warm up on weekends until 10 or so."

"So in the meantime, you just save yourself paying anyone else? What if you have a rush?"

"I put on a puppy dog expression and say, shucks, you guys grew up with me, you know I can't do anything right," Pacey said.

"Seriously?" She frowned.

"No, of course not, I call some of my employees to come in early," Pacey said. "I just had to stop myself from asking you if you had homework."

"Actually, I do sort of. I need to review some manuscripts from the slush pile this weekend. I brought them with me," Joey said. "Mostly." She looked at her nails. Her nail polish was cracking. She said, "Mostly, I came up to see how you were. It's impossible to get into the kitchen at your Manhattan place."

"Cause it's not my place," Pacey said. "And I'm fine, totally cool."

She poked at her cuticles. "Are you sure? It's me and we're alone here."

"I'm good with my earthquake feet," he said. "Now I'm the poet."

She watched him chop veggies and then start cleaning fish. She said, "Who wants fish for breakfast?"

"Bagel and lox? People who enjoy fish for breakfast are probably people who live in small towns on the ocean?"

"I wouldn't order it," she said. "I'd want pancakes. Or french toast."

"There's both on the menu," he said. "Let me know which order is yours and I'll throw in some flounder."

"That sounds disgusting," she said.

"You ate enough of it when we were on the True Love," Pacey said, looking over at her.

"And that was enough, seriously." She moved to the sink and started washing the knives he'd already used.

"Are you gonna stay back here until I admit to not being fine?"

"Are you not fine?"

"I'm very fine," he said, smirking at her. He was wearing a pretty tight long sleeve t-shirt that day. He managed to make the jeans he had on look damn good as well. She blushed.

Then she said, "If you wanted to talk about all this with your mom and your dad. I'm here."

"Thank you," Pacey said. "I actually used up all my emotional breakdown minutes this week on poor Dawson. That'll teach him to call me out of the goodness of his heart."

"So you did talk to someone," she said. She finished cleaning and went back to sitting by the oven where Pacey was working.

"Not an actual counselor, mind you, because Dawson really does not qualify for that, time in therapy or no," Pacey said.

"I've never been in therapy, even though Jen keeps saying everyone should," Joey said.

"That's because Jen knows she should be the one being a therapist, not the one being a gallery manager or whatever she's doing this week," Pacey said.

"I tried to bring that up but she shut me down," Joey said.

"So, Jo, what the fuck is a slush pile?"

She explained the manuscripts that she was reading, how her supervising editor told her she didn't trust the latest lowly person assigned to the slush pile so she expected Joey to find if there was anything good in there.

Right before the restaurant opened, Pacey made her french toast and told her to shoo and eat with the customers. She'd finished the delicious breakfast and two cups of coffee before she stopped reading the first awful manuscript. Pacey plopped down next to her.

He pushed a plate towards her. "I told you I didn't want fish for breakfast," Joey said.

"You already had breakfast, this is brunch-ish," Pacey said. "Besides it's good, eat it."

She looked at him and put her hand over his. "What happened?"

"It worries me you can still do that," Pacey said, smiling. He sighed. "Eat your fish and I'll tell you."

"Did you poison it or something?" She took a bite and then another. "Wow, this is good."

He nodded. "I'm trying it out for the lunch crowd."

"Try away, I approve completely, and now tell me," Joey said.

Pacey was looking down or away, avoiding her eyes. He finally said, "The sperm donor called. He wants lunch with me."

"Do you want to meet him?"

"Not really," Pacey said. "But I should."

"Why should you?" Joey pushed her plate away. "You owe him nothing."

"He didn't know," Pacey said.

"Yeah, and if he had he'd've been there every weekend to take you to hockey games," Joey said. "I doubt it."

"Maybe he would've," Pacey said.

"We'll never know," Joey said. "You had nothing to do with it."

"I used to wish I had a different dad," Pacey said.

"I wished more than you did," Joey said, smiling.

"Sure, but mine is coming true," Pacey said.

"No, it's not. You have the same father. And this sperm donor guy," Joey said.

"You're really intent on this issue, Joey," Pacey said.

"I've been pretty invested at certain points in your life in making sure you knew you were loved and wanted, at least by your dad and brother. I'm pretty invested in the Pacey I know who is a kind, loving man," Joey said.

"Thank you," Pacey said, blushing slightly. "If I meet my so-called sperm donor I'm not going to turn into an asshole. I'm pretty sure about that."

"I don't think you'll be an asshole, I think there's a well of insecurity lurking under that hip adult exterior that's just waiting to burst out," Joey said. "You act out and hurt people when you're insecure."

"Are you referring to prom?"

"Ya think?" She smiled at him. "This guy didn't get in contact with you because of who you are as a person. He clearly didn't know you as a person or he would have been here every weekend, even in your super awkward teenage years."

"When you dated me," Pacey says.

"No, I dated you in your much less awkward late teen years," Joey said. "I'm sorry, I'm probably projecting."

"You're the one afraid of me changing," Pacey said. "Cause you care about that."

"I care about you," she said. "Do you want me to go with you for sperm donor lunch?" She said it quickly.

Pacey snorted. "Please don't say it like that, I keep thinking of menus, and anyway. Yes, if you want, I think I'd appreciate you there."

"I do want," she said. "Call me." She got up, gathering her manuscripts. She was probably retreating but she was willing to admit she needed to end this conversation now.

Five hours later, she was on the phone to Dawson. She said, "I don't know, I just worry about him."

"Of course you do," Dawson said.

"I heard that tone," Joey said. "This isn't about us getting back together or something like that."

"It would be okay if it was," Dawson said.

"You really just said that," Joey said.

"Joey, if you laid out all the time we were actually romantically involved, it would be about three months," Dawson said. "It doesn't diminish what we are to each other to say we're soulmates, just platonically."

"Are you saying this because you have a girlfriend?"

"No," Dawson said. "What I'm saying is that you and Pacey have a strong connection that is different from our connection, I would say our connection is better -"

"Oh, good, it is you, Dawson, I was worried," Joey said, laughing.

"Look, the spectre of Pacey in pain from feeling unwanted is scary for you because you've been there and because you rely on Pacey not needing you so you can feel everything has changed and grown up and you'll meet someone who makes you feel like Pacey did," Dawson said.

"Okay, I disagree with this assessment of me as someone who is, what? Forever in love with Pacey and pretending I'm not," Joey said. "I've been in love besides Pacey."

"Sure," Dawson said. "You made the effort to keep all those other lovers in your life the way you have for Pacey."

"Why do you sound like Bessie?"

"Oh, let me put it in terms you're used to from me: this 3rd act revelation is perfect for shaking you out of your complacency, don't pass up your romantic lead," Dawson said.

"I'm telling him you said that," Joey said.

"As long as you tell me what Pacey's fatherly genetic half is like," Dawson said.

Tuesday night, she dressed in what she deemed her most intimidating dress. She wanted something that said she would fuck over anyone who hurt her people. "Which means scarlet lipstick," her roommate said. "And stilettos. Can you really walk in those?"

"I really can," Joey said. "Let me tell you about my waitress job senior year in college."

She walked to the street and waited for the cab Pacey had said he would send. He looked over her ensemble as she got in the back seat with him. "Wow, Joey, you look great."

"I was going for scary," Joey said.

Pacey put his arm around her and said quietly in her ear, "I'm scared. I'm scared I'm gonna have a disturbing hard on for the whole dinner."

She said, "Nice to know you're still fifteen at heart."

There was a look in his eyes that reminded her of Pacey at fifteen or eighteen but she didn't say anything.

The sperm donor was named Cliff Lowell. He appeared to be in his mid 40s making him just out of college when he was sleeping with a married woman who already had four kids. He was 6'5" and had blue eyes. Cliff started by going over his medical history and his family's medical history. It was dull and nothing that needed warning about. After he showed them both pictures of his 3 sons, Joey restrained herself from saying it was time to go.

She was not in charge of what Pacey got out of this experience, she reminded herself.

Cliff said, "I know what I did was wrong. I did know. And when I came back to Capeside 3 years later, it was pretty obvious. I mean, there's this kid that looks exactly like me when I was a toddler."

"Really?" Joey looked at the pictures of Cliff on his phone from his childhood. They were basically Pacey as a kid but with straight hair.

"But your mother, she pretended like nothing had happened and I assumed she was happy with her husband again. I think the most we even talked about it was when I said Pacey was a weird name."

"It's my father's mother's maiden name," Pacey said, frowning.

"That makes sense, then," Cliff said. "Sorry. See, this is all very weird. I know you have a family. You have a father."

"I do," Pacey said. "I have a dad, I'm good."

"Okay, that's great," Cliff said. The rest of the dinner was awkward. Still, Pacey passed along his number and email and Cliff said he would friend him on Facebook.

Pacey pulled Joey's hand along behind him as they got in a cab. He told the cabbie his apartment address. She said, "Did you want to talk about that?"

"God, no," Pacey said. "Thanks for coming, though." He put his arm around her.

She said, "You weren't hard the whole dinner, you lied, lied."

"Wrong," he said, guiding her hand to his crotch. He pulled her closer still and kissed her neck. He said, "Let's make this a good night."

"Okay," she said. She clasped her hands in her lap. "But not a show, okay?"

"Someday I will convince you to make out with me in a cab," Pacey said.

Joey said, "Is this us getting together for the third time or random one off hook up number 5?"

"Is it 5?"

"My junior year, that other time my junior year, that time my senior year before you were dating Jen, and what, what was that 8 months ago?" She crossed her legs, already getting warm at the thought of a good night.

"We were celebrating your job, or mine. One of those. We were drunk," Pacey said.

"We hook up a lot," Joey said.

They were at Pacey's apartment. He left the cabbie a generous tip as he shuffled Joey out, towards the lobby of his place. "Promise me one thing," Pacey said, grabbing her ass and pulling her against his definitely hard dick. "Promise me you won't take off those heels."

"You're so predictable," she said.

"The food at that place you worked was frankly subpar," Pacey said. "But seeing you was always fantastic."

She wanted to talk more, clarify important things, but by then they were in his apartment and he was lifting her dress and running his hand up her thigh and every single person she knew who told her that Pacey was different was exactly right. She kissed him and tried to get his damn tie off without strangling him.

He got her back on the bed, her dress and underwear somewhere on the floor. He thrust into her easily, she was so wet. He pulled up her leg so her heel was sliding along his thigh and side. She said, "You're such a pervert." She made sure the back of her heel was against his bare chest.

He said, "You're not turned on at all."

She loved his dick inside her, it was ridiculous and true. She came first and when he was done, he gently removed her heels before pulling the blanket over them.

Pacey shared his apartment with three other guys, but none of them lived in Manhattan full-time. She woke up under him, his heartbeat a steady rhythm she could feel through her breast. She shoved him off her. "Pace," she said.

"Hmm, do you have work today?"

"Of course," she said. "Don't you?"

"I was going to call in sick, you should, too."

"No," Joey said.

"When do you ever do that? I've never done it in two years, so I feel okay doing it today," Pacey said. She was persuaded.

They lay in bed after their respective phone calls. She said, "I never knew where your name came from."

"You never asked," Pacey said.

"I never thought your name was weird, either," Joey said.

"We should get back together," Pacey said. "Or be together, however you want to say it."

"What if I go back to wearing flats?"

"Even then," Pacey said, kissing his way down her neck to her breasts.

"We've been apart for a reason," Joey said, trying to convince herself. "Why does you having your world turned upside down change that?"

"Because, for me, it made me contemplate who I really love, who I rely on. You're in the top four, there, Joey, and the only one I want in my bed," he said.

"Yeah," she said. "I keep thinking about how I want you, why I never act on it," she said. "You scare me."

"You don't have to wear the heels all the time," Pacey said.

"Not like that, God," she said. "With you, it's everything. It's my whole life, it's forever," she said.

"Same," Pacey said. "Except I don't find that scary anymore."

"I know," she said. "I know."

She got up. She took a shower and put her dress back on plus a pair of flip flops she found in the second bathroom. She left to get coffee and something to eat and think.

One of the things she loved about New York City was that no one really looked twice at a woman in slinky black dress and $2 flip flops lining up for coffee and danishes. She was fairly sure she had a hickey on her collarbone, too, just to make her evening activities even more obvious.

She knocked on Pacey's door and he opened it, a towel around his waist. "You came back," he said. He dropped the towel and kissed her.

"I got you black coffee and a chocolate croissant," she said. "And I think, you know, Pacey, I think I'm ready for forever."

"Me, too," he said. He sipped his coffee. "Even though it's going to be super irritating how many of our friends and family are going to say I told you so."

"I know," she said. "I know. But I love you anyway."