Memo: Ohmigod, I can't believe I'm doing another fanfic when I'm already booked with all my other ones…lol

I hate these spur of the moment feelings and I wish I could stop myself from doing this- and then I'll regret it right after I post it, but whatever

Note: This is my fanfic, in other word's- please don't criticize that you don't like the idea or that you don't think it would happen- it's very much possible and you guys know it!!- but just don't like that option!

Disclaimer: Anyone whose read my stories knows I'm not that fond of these, lol

Edward's View-

"I love you Bella," I said to her, as I dropped her off at her porch and then turned around, not waiting for a response, to my car. She hadn't been communicating to me at all. Her face seemed to lose all color drastically, her eyes bruised with purple sketches from troublesome nights sleep- one's she wouldn't allow me to attend anymore, and her expression had become sullen, yet silent.

She didn't talk to me anymore- although she seemed to everyone else. She would perk up when someone else came up, happy to walk away from me. I didn't understand what was going on with her, and nor did I ask- my presence seemed to only irritate her.

I sensed that she wanted me to leave as well- although I wasn't so fond of that idea myself, I wanted her to tell me personally before I acted any different. She wasn't speaking though, and I had learned to control my temper around her now- for some unapparent reason to me I had stopped arguing with her. She was scaring me for the past week. All our conversations were shorter, the "I love you" only coming from me now, and the hello's as well, good byes were actually the only thing she now said.

I heard Charlie's thoughts over it as well. He thought I was leaving her again…something about lifeless all over again apparently. I didn't want to ask.

"Edward," her voice rang in the background for the first time, and I froze- it was soft and gentle when carried by the wind. I was over exuberant, not letting my happiness at this show however. Her face had begun to reflect little to nothing only about a month after the Volturi incident.

"Yes?" I asked, and turned to look at her when I was leaving. I was hoping more than anything that the fear I had built up inside me would leave, but apparently it refused to. Every day instead, it only grew in alarmingly large portions.

"I need to talk to you," she declared. "It's important."

"What is it?" I asked, exuberant to what she had to say. She wasn't telling me what had been bothering her, causing her to look so distant in the past few days- week actually.

"I think we should take a walk," she said, and began to stroll my way. Her arms blocking the rain from hitting her face- hiding her eyes I noticed.

"It's raining," I exclaimed. I thought she had hated the rain…

"Do you mind then?" she asked. "It's important. It won't take long, I swear."

"I don't mind," I answered hesitantly. "But I don't know- what if you catch a cold?" I didn't want to say what was really bothering me though, what if Charlie came back? Then she would go back home, and I wouldn't get this opportunity to talk to her again.

"Allright," she answered, and began to lead the path to the trail.

"Well Edward," she slurred, "I need you to understand something. I, well Edward I-" and then she suddenly stopped, and I noticed I was at the exact spot where I had left her…

"I don't think I can do this anymore Edward. I love you I guess-" she tried helplessly- "but I suppose that was then and this is now Edward. You've broken me too much Edward. And I can't live like that, forever in deceit and forever in constant lies. I-"

"You guess?" I murmured, shocked by what I had just heard. "And constant lies?"

"Well," she tried again, biting her lip, her eyes rolled up and looking for some help. "I don't think we should be together anymore. Or at least take a break, at least for a while," she tried again. "And for the lying part- I know you don't do that anymore, but I'm never sure anymore Edward- this time I've spent with you has only brought up doubts. I-"

"Is this because of Jacob?" I asked silently. Surely, I thought, he had been planting doubts in her mind…surely he…

"I realized Edward that I'm just undecisive right now. I don't believe those feelings should ever be in a relationship and I think we should end this right now. You damaged me without repair- and I suppose I'm better now. But how much longer before you leave me again? Before I actually do accept that proposal and you shadow away? Before I'm changed and you decide I'm too boring and decide to leave?"

"Bella-" I began, shocked. I couldn't believe she was thinking this way. "I would never-"

"Just save it for someone who cares," she retorted. "It's over. It's for the best too Edward, we were never meant to be. A vampire and a damsel in distress- never worked out, nor will it ever work out. I don't believe I'm meant to be with you Edward Cullen, and I don't believe I deserve you. You for one thing, are this divine, wonderful, far more deser-"

"Bella!" I tried again, the tone of shock in my voice I knew could not be concealed by anything I did or tried. "What happened to your epiphany?"

"It died," she shrugged simply. "It-"

"No," I roared, the courage in me finally building up. "You were silent for SO long and you didn't tell me anything, and now when I finally am talking to you, you want to LEAVE me- so what Bella? So that you can go back to the real person you love, Jacob Black? I know I promised I would leave if you asked me to- but of all things, like this Bella? You want me to leave you because you think I'm too good for you? That I'm going to leave you? Have you even paid attention to anything I've said to you before Bella," I asked, grabbing her by the face, "I love you more than anything. I'll never leave you Bella. I'll always be by you. I-"

"Cut the bullshit Edward," her tone hardened. "I don't swear Edward- I don't think I really ever even have, but this really is some serious. I don't want it to be like this. I-"

"Bella," I exclaimed, and brought her face to mine and kissed her. She wasn't kissing back though…and when I pulled back I only saw that she had a very amused note hanging in her eyes. "Did you feel anything?"

"No Edward, and if you'll let me explain you'll understand why," she smiled looking at me annoyed. I'd never seen that type of expression with her before- one such hardened as well. "You caused me hurt once Edward Cullen, and now I'm going to return the favor. It's break up time again, and this time there's no getting back."

"But..but," I stuttered. "I thought you-"

"I did at one point I suppose," she pondered. "And I suppose you do too. But this time it's your turn to get your heart broken. It's my time to live. You ruined my life and so I'm going to ruin yours. I don't love you. It's as simple as that."

"You what?" I asked, sure I'd heard the last words wrong…

"I don't love you Edward. Now please go. I'm already all wet and Charlie will be home any minute. I-"

But I left her there, talking to herself.

I left myself there as well- again.

First time true love is lost, the person finds themselves lost; confused. Second time, they find it hard to recover- almost impossible. Once true love would leave- this person would be next to dead.

James used the first one up. The second time I had used up.

While the whole concept of girls being more attached then guys ever were was a false accusation. What she never seemed to understand when we were together- were I noticed- was how much I cared about her. And now I knew I would never be able to show it to her.

Third time though, I knew, that third time came, and the person would die. Forever.

Bella had taken the third time from me.

I found that my heart was lost as I was running, and what's lost is lost. Merely…gone.

NOTE: I WANT to have Bella leave Edward- sorry, but I really believe that someone needs this. PLEASE don't criticize this idea basically that you don't think Edward would leave Bella, give me something MORE than just that!! I probably will change my mind…but oh well. I just believe that the idea is hard to grasp- since Bella dESERVES a chance to live…and by the way this is NOT the sequel to "It's your fault" if anyone was curious.

REMEMBER- You HAVEN'T heard Bella's side yet. And so it's NOT out of character because you're USED to Bella's side, and that'll probably be next chapter!!

Oh well, tell me what you think- seriously- I have no idea what to do after this, whether to split them up completely or have them together again or keep them apart, this is NOT a oneshot probably, and I have no intention of making it one either- I know these ideas are usually perceived as one, but seriously REVIEW!!

TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK!!