Disclaimer: I own no one!! HA!! For my own purposes, Lita never dated Matt.
Matt cringed as he heard the shouts of "We want Jeff!" from the crowd. It had always been Jeff that they wanted. Never him. Lita didn't even want him. It was always Jeff. She hadn't even noticed when Matt had fallen in love with her. She had been to busy hanging out with Jeff.
Matt walked up the ramp, his thoughts churning. His self-hatred had hit an all-time high. Everyone hated him. But what was he supposed to do? Sit back and be happy that everyone loved Jeff and didn't give a rat's ass about him? Be happy that Jeff was the golden boy and he was the pathetic loser in the background trying to get some glory of his own?
He was beginning to understand why Christian had turned on Edge. After putting up with being in the shadows for so long, it was only too easy to snap. He knew he wasn't the high-flyer or the crazy dresser, but that didn't mean he wasn't just as good as Jeff. But no one could see that. His own father sang the praises of Jeff constantly, forgetting Matt's accomplishments as if they'd never happened. The only way out was to turn on Jeff. Maybe then people would understand how much pain he'd hidden inside, but no, all they cared about was poor wittle Jeffy.
"I'm so sick of Jeff!!" Matt shouted as he slammed his fist into the wall.
"That's too bad Matt, because I just secured him as talent for Smackdown." Stephanie smirked as she walked him.
Matt stared after her, disbelievingly, then knocked over a nearby table, covered in food.
"Dammit!!" Matt stormed into his locker room, collected his stuff and hurried out to his car. He sped off to the hotel and spent the night fuming and trashing whatever he saw. Lita called him around midnight.
"Matt, are you ok?"
"OK? Sure Lita, I'm great. My brother's coming to Smackdown and I'll be stuck in his shadow again!! I'm really looking forward to it, let me tell ya!!"
Lita sighed. "Matt, you have to get over this jealousy thing..."
"Oh yeah sure, it's so easy to get over it. Everyone loves him and none gives a damn about me!! Even when I was still with him, they didn't care. My own father cares about him more!! I might as well be pushing up daisies for all they care!!! I could be dead right now and they wouldn't feel anything!!"
"Matt...." Lita sighed.
"I have to go Lita. I'll talk to you later."
"No, Matt!!" Lita sighed as she heard him hang up. "I wanted to tell you that I love you."
next Smackdown.........
Matt shouldered his bag as he stepped out of his car. He could tell from the large screaming crowd a little way off that Jeff had arrived. He grumbled to himself as he entered the arena. Around him everyone was talking excitedly about the arrival of Jeff.
"Losers." Matt pushed open the door to his locker room and dropped his bag on the ground. He sat down in a chair and leaned his head against the wall. A few minutes later, someone knocked on the door. "Yeah, come in."
He sat up as Jeff walked in.
"What are you doing in here?!" Matt stood up and faced Jeff.
"I just wanted to tell you, no hard feelings and I forgive you. By the way, we're tagging together against Tajiri and Jamie Knoble." Jeff walked out the door, leaving a stunned Matt Hardy behind him.
"DAMMIT!!" Matt pushed over the changing screen that stood next to him and slammed his fist into the wall. The room shook a little with the force, and Matt went to change into his ring gear.
The Match........
Matt entered the ring first, watching Tajiri and Jamie out of the corner of his eye. Nidia bounced around outside the ring, taunting him.
"I think Jeff is so sexy Matt!!"
Matt leaned over the ropes and caught her by the hair as Jeff's music started and the arena erupted. He scowled and let go of the screaming Nidia, moving just in time, as Jamie and Tajiri sailed over the ropes where he had been a second ago. Jeff entered the ring and climbed up onto the turnbuckle as the arena was illuminated by camera flashes. Matt rolled his eyes and leaned against the ropes as Jeff finished his entrance and Tajiri and Jamie climbed back into the ring.
The match was over in minutes, Jeff of course hitting the Swanton on Jamie to get the pin. As Jeff celebrated the win, Matt made his way to the back. The fans still booed him and cheered for Jeff. Inside him something snapped. he turned and faced Jeff in the ring, his face hardening into a dark glare.
"If that's the way it's gotta be, then so be it."
Matt shouldered his bag and left the room without bothering to change. As he started towards the parking lot, Jeff ran up behind him.
"Hey Matt, where're you going?"
"I'm leaving Jeff. For good."
"What? You're gonna stop wrestling just because I'm here? I knew you were jealous, but man!!"
"It goes deeper than that, Jeff. Why stay here when no one wants to see me? When the fans could care less whether I'm alive or dead? Why stay here when I'll only be in your shadow again? I wrestle for the fans, and since the fans want you, I'm leaving."
"But Matt, that's not true!!" Jeff pleaded with his brother.
"Oh isn't it?! Every time we went out there they screamed for you, begged for you. But when I was out there, the crowd was dead. They didn't care. Our father doesn't even care anymore!! You're all he ever talks about!! Jeff this and Jeff that!!" Matt shouted, causing Jeff to step back. "Maybe I shouldn't even be alive anymore!!"
Matt turned and left a speechless Jeff behind him. He muttered to himself as he walked out to his car, got in and left. He knew exactly what he was going to do. If the fans didn't want them, if they didn't care, then he'd be gone.
When he got into his room, Matt sat down and wrote a note to anyone who bothered to look for him.
To the unlikely person that cares,
I'm gone. You're rid of me. No more Matt Hardy. Gonna have a party now? I thought so. Jeff can rest assured that I won't attack him again because of jealousy and Dad won't have to pretend he cares about what I've done in this business. Shane and Shannon won't have to deal with my "ego" anymore. And Lita, now you'll get to find out the truth. I love you. You could care less, but I love you. You may have been to wrapped up in Jeff but I still loved you. Too bad I could never tell you in person.
Matt left the note on the bed and walked into the bathroom. He picked up a bottle of aspirin and poured out the contents. After getting water from the tap, he began to pop the pills into his mouth. He lost count after 30. As the room began to darken, he heard a knocking at the door.
"Matt, let me in please!!" Lita.
He leaned on the counter and tried to pull himself towards the door, but he was already losing consciousness. The bottle of aspirin fell to the floor, the few remaining pills scattering.
"Fine! Good thing I got the key from the front desk!!"
As Matt slipped away from the world, the door swung open and Lita stepped in. She screamed when she saw him and the pills on the floor.
"No!! Matt!! Somebody!! HELP!!" She screamed as she ran to him and kneeled next to him, drawing him into her arms. Matt watched her through half closed eyes, surprised to see tears streaming down her face. Trish ran in then, shrieked at the scene and ran for the phone. As she dialed 911, tears welled in her eyes and she whispered "Don't die Matt, don't die!!"
Lita leaned over Mat, crying.
"Matt, you can't die!! I love you Matt!! Don't die!! I love you!!" She shook him, trying to keep him awake.
"What the hell?!" Jeff walked in and nearly lost control at what he saw. He ran over to Matt and Lita and kneeled next to them. Behind them Trish was hanging up the phone.
"The paramedics are on their way!!" She joined them on the ground.
"Matt, why?" Jeff let tears flow freely as he grabbed his brother's hand.
"I figured...nobody cared...so...why...stay." Matt mumbled.
"No, Matt! We care!!" Trish grabbed a hold of his arm. "You don't know how much everyone cares about you!!"
"I'm sorry I was such...a problem. I love you guys."
Matt's eyes shut and Lita screamed.
"NO!! Matt!! You can't leave me!! I love you too much!! I can't live without you!!" Lita sobbed as Trish wrapped her arms around her. Jeff cried as he held his brother. He lay his head down on Matt's chest and sobbed, then suddenly felt something beneath him. Very faintly, Matt's heart was still beating.
"He's not gone yet, guys. And if I have anything to say, he won't be gone for a long time."
Lita and Trish turned to him, surprised. Lita crawled over to Matt and lay against him, listening to his heart.
"You won't leave me Matt, I won't let you."
Moments later the paramedics arrived and took Matt to the hospital.
the end???
R/R!!! PLEEEEASE!!!
