Disclaimer: I do not own Trinity Blood and write this fic for your amusement only; I make no money off it. I hope you enjoy and please review! This is also my first TB fic, so please go easy on me! ;)

Chapter 1: My Feelings, Your Thoughts

The Albion Royal Palace...

"Would you like another cup of tea, Your Highness?" Astharoshe Asran asked her friend as she reached over the table for the fine china teapot to offer her a refill.

"Yes, please." Esther answered and she held out her teacup for Astha to refill. And you don't have to call me what when we're alone. In fact, I prefer you didn't; we are friends after all." Even though she was a queen now and has been for the past five years, she still hasn't quite gotten used to be addressed so formally and often missed hearing the sound of her name, always insisting that her closest friends use it when they visited her.

"Of course, Esther, I understand." Astha smiled as she poured her friend another cup of fine white tea. It was late evening and the two friends were having tea and chatting at a table on the balcony of Esther's royal bedchamber while enjoying the beauty of the late evening atmosphere. Today was the queen's twenty-first birthday and the whole Kingdom of Albion celebrated the event from morning till evening until the Royal Palace was closed off to the public and the guests sent home.

Only one stayed behind on the insistence of the queen and that was her close friend, the Viscountess of Odessa and Duchess of Kiev. Due to both of their duties, they did not get to see each other in person often and knowing how Esther longed for the company of close friends whenever possible, Astha gave in. The young queen was the closest she had to a sister of her own and it was very hard for her to refuse Esther anything knowing how lonely she could get with her royal status distancing her from normal people.

"So did you have fun today, Astha? All that partying has made me so exhausted; it's a good thing birthdays only come once a year!" Esther said with a smile and wink and she sipped her tea. The viscountess laughed. She knew her friend was not a big party person; she only did so today because it was her own birthday party and she was expected to socialize with the guests, especially the important ones.

"Yes, very much. I'm also honored you would invite me to have tea with you in your own chambers and offer me a room in the royal palace for the night. I really didn't want to impose on your like that."

Esther shook her head. "No, not at all; I am always happy to see you and have you here. And having tea now is especially good, considering how much both of us ate today; it helps to ease down all that food and aid in digestion."

Astha raised a brow in surprise. "Really? How did you know that?"

"Father Nightroad told me. We used to have tea together like this after dinner every night while I still lived under his care at the Vatican" Esther answered as her voice softened and she lowered her eyes, letting her bangs cover her face.

Astha frowned at the mention of the queen's former guardian and her own former partner. Although she hated to pry, she felt like she had to ask, if only to comfort her friend. "You still think of him a lot, do you?"

Esther nodded. "Not a day has gone by that I have not thought of him. And Ion as well. I do not blame him for leaving me to pursue his brother; I understand that Cain's madness must be stopped, but I wished he could have at least said good-bye before going."

Astha's expression softened as she reached over and gently placed a hand on her friend's shoulder. "Don't be sad, Esther. I'm sure he had his reasons. Its not like he wanted to leave you; even if he himself may not realize it, I can see that he loved you very much and still does. Wherever he is now, he must miss you terribly."

The young queen looked up, her eyes shining with hope. "Really? You think so?"

The viscountess nodded as she withdrew her hand. "I know so" she insisted. "If there is something you should know about me is that I am a good judge of character. Why would he try so hard to protect you and keep you out of harm's way if he didn't?"

"But its been five years since the last time I saw him. You would think that he'd at least write me if only to let me know he's alright and doing well."

"Like I said, I'm sure he had his reasons. I'm also sure that he'll return to you one day when the time is right."

Esther sighed. "I guess you're right. Has he at least tried to contact you even once these past few years?"

Astha shook her head. "I'm afraid not. If he did, I would tell you. Ion too. Its unfortunate that neither of them has been seen or heard from in many years, at least not by anyone I know, even the Empress. Last we heard, they were traveling together in search of Cain. But I do know that they are alive and well, I can feel it."

"I see… If you have such faith in them, I suppose I should too. I've missed them so much, especially Father Nightroad. I never got the chance to thank him for taking me in and caring for me. He's done so much for me yet I've given him nothing in return. At times I've felt like I've been nothing but a burden to him" the queen said sadly.

"You were never a burden to him" Astha insisted "He wanted to do it because you were his everything and he loved you."

Esther blushed. "I suppose you're right. Say, Astha, can you keep a secret?"

"Sure, anything."

"You know that I care deeply for Father Nightroad, right?"

"Yes, you've told me many times."

"What would you say if I told you the true nature of my feelings for him?"

"I don't understand, what do you mean?"

"I mean that I love him more then a guardian. I did see him as a father figure once but soon found that those feelings changed. You see, I love Father Nightroad not as a child loves a parent but as a woman loves a man." The young queen blushed furiously as she said this; she had kept it a secret for so long that she felt like she had to tell someone just to get it off her chest.

Astha's eyes widened at her friend's confession. "Really?" she asked, leaning forward. She never knew Esther harbored such feelings for her former guardian considering their age difference, which was a huge one. But she supposed it shouldn't come as a surprise since Abel Nightroad was a very attractive man, even she had to admit that. "Did he ever know?"

Esther shrugged her shoulders. "I don't know. He never gave any indication that he did. I never told him, I couldn't."

"But why not?"

"Because I was afraid, afraid of how he would react. I was very young then and still am compared to him. I had no idea if he felt the same way or if he simply sees me as a child he took under his wing out of charity. I never knew if he would accept my feelings or be appalled and disgusted by them so I could never bring myself to tell him. Now I'll never know…"

"Don't say that. Abel will come back to you someday and I think you should tell him when he does; he might feel the same way and even if he doesn't, I'm sure he will at least acknowledge your feelings. You will never know until you tell him."

"I suppose you're right. But its been so long already, what if he's forgotten all about me?" Esther sighed as she looked up into the starry night sky. Not wanting to argue any further, Astha remained silent as she followed her friend's gaze. She knew Esther didn't mean it; there was no way her former guardian could ever forget her and they both knew it.

"It's a very lovely evening is it? The stars sure are beautiful tonight. I'm sure somewhere out there, Abel and Ion must be enjoying the view too." Astha said.

"Mmm… maybe…" was her friend's only reply…

SSSSSS

The Outskirts of Londinium…

"Hey, Abel, is the food ready yet?" A young blond vampire asked upon his return to the spot where he and his crusnik companion were making camp. They were passing by Londinium in their travels but could not find room and board because all the inns were full with visitors for the queen's twenty-first birthday party; it was an event celebrated by the whole country, especially those living in the capital with many more visitors from around the country. Guests had to reserve their rooms weeks in advance so there was no way travelers with no reservations could get rooms. And since they couldn't stay at an inn, the two companions had to make camp in the forest just outside the city.

"Oh, sorry, Ion, my mind just wandered off a bit" Abel answered in his usual cheery manner as he continued to stir the contents of the boiling pot before him "Yes, dinner will be ready soon. Any luck finding anything edible in the forest?" As if in answer, the young blond vampire dumped the contents of his bag on the mat before their campfire and cooking pot.

"There wasn't much but I managed to find some mushrooms, nuts, and berries. The fruits have already been picked clean off the trees, no doubt from the city's shop and inn keepers so we'll just have to make do with that rabbit you caught and what I found."

"That's alright, Ion, it'll be good enough. I know its not what you're used to but I hope you'll find rabbit stew and water to be acceptable as dinner. Some bread would be nice too but I really prefer not to go into the city and stand in line at the stores."

Ion gave a soft laugh. "Of course, it'll be just fine. Funny you should say such a thing considering that we've been eating like this for the last five years. But I appreciate the sentiment." It was true; Abel knew Ion was used to the finer things in life with his aristocratic up-bringing and was always considerate of it even though he didn't have to be since the young vampire noble was the one who insisted on accompanying him on his journey knowing how rough it would be. And even though Abel tried to discourage Ion from following him at first, he later became glad for his friend's company which made his journey more pleasant and less lonely.

The two vampires have been traveling together for the past five years in search of Abel's twin brother, Cain. So far, they've had limited success due to the older crusinik's evasiveness but both of them had faith that with enough persistence, they would persevere. Abel was grateful for his companion's company and they became close friends which he found surprising considering the fact that they had once been rivals for Esther's affections. Ion himself was surprised as well; never in his wildest dreams did he imagine that he would fall for a terran girl, let alone find himself competing with another vampire for her love. And even though he never confronted his friend about it, Ion had always suspected that Abel purposely threw himself into the fountain on his grandmother's estate to draw Esther's attention away from him.

As the two friends sat around their campfire sipping their stew, Ion decided to break the awkward silence. Normally, they had no problem engaging in conversation at mealtimes but it looked as though Abel had something on his mind and the young blond vampire knew exactly what. It was her birthday today and they did happen to be in town so Ion decided to make a suggestion:

"You know, today is the queen's birthday. And since we are in the area, don't you think we should drop by and say hello? After all, neither of us have seen her in years."

Abel almost jumped in surprise at his friend's suggestion. Even though he wasn't adverse to the idea, he still wasn't sure if it was a good one; he doubted that Esther would be thrilled to see him now considering that he left her without so much as a good-bye or letter. It wasn't because he didn't want to stay in touch but because of his concern for her safety; if Cain had any hint that Esther was his greatest weakness, it would without question, put her in danger and that was the last thing he wanted.

"Well, I appreciate the suggestion, Ion but I'm not sure if it's such a good idea."

"Why not? Don't you miss her?"

"Of course I do, very much. But it seems too risky to me. We still haven't found Cain yet and I fear for her safety should he ever guess that she is my greatest weakness."

"I understand your concern. But I think it will still be alright if you were to visit her in secret. You're a shape shifter after all; I'm sure you can find a way to see her without anyone knowing."

"Perhaps. But I find it odd that you of all people would insist I go to her. After all, I know you have feelings for her as well."

Ion blushed. "Yes, that's true and still is. But I know that her heart was already yours long before she met me." He placed a gentle hand on his friend's and smiled. "I only wish for her happiness. And if she loves you, I will understand; I bear no grudge because both of you are my friends."

Abel smiled. "I see…thank you, Ion, you are such a good friend. Do you really think I should go to her? I have no idea how she'll react; after all, I left her so abruptly." The crusinik could not help repressing a shudder. He imagined that Esther would be displeased; she may even slap him, demanding to know where he had been and why he never contacted her for the past five years. He wouldn't blame her if she did; she had every right.

"I'm positive" Ion insisted "No matter what her reaction, I think you owe her an explanation at the very least. It will also be your chance to tell her how you feel and wish her a happy birthday too."

Abel could not help but sigh. It looks like his friend knew him quite well. It was to be expected after being steadfast traveling companions for five years after all. Not to mention the time they fought side by side to protect the empress and expose the extremist faction in the Methuselah Empire. He was also grateful for Ion's understanding; the boy had matured much during the time of their travels, having been exposed to the world outside the empire made him more compassionate, sympathetic, as well as understanding of those who were different or had less then he did. He also became more perceptive as well and soon figured out that Abel's feelings for Esther was not that of a father for his daughter; the crusinik clearly loved her as a man loved a woman.

"You're right" he agreed "I will find a way to see her tonight. Will you be alright out here by yourself for a bit?"

Ion snorted. "Of course. I'm not exactly a helpless child, you know. I'll be fine, just make sure you get back before dawn so we can pack our things and leave. We still have a way to go before we reach the place your brother was last sighted."

Abel felt his face growing hot. "Whatever makes you think I would be gone that long if I'm just going to say 'Hi' to the queen and wish her a happy birthday?"

His friend rolled his eyes. "Never mind that, just go. I'll be waiting here."

Abel was grateful for the cue. He wanted to get out of this awkward conversation as soon as possible. Putting his finished bowl of stew down, he stood up and brushed himself off.

"Very well" he said. "I'll be going now; see you in a bit."

"You too, Abel. Bye for now. And tell Esther I said 'Hi' and wish her a happy birthday for me too."

"I will."

A/N: So what do you think? I just started watching TB recently and found that I really liked it so I came up with this fic. I planned it as a one-shot originally but may want to make it a short multi-chapter, maybe 4 or 5. Anyway, look forward to my next installment!