Harry Potter's "Diary/Blackbook"
Harry's note!
Dear All Potterheads/Derranged people who like to read my personal life. You realize this is my diary. Now you realize that most "males" don't keep diaries. But Frankly.I REALLY don't care, and besides.Tom Riddle had one, so why can't I? So we'll start off with the three dimwits that I have to live with, which obviously you know about, because you read about my life.in a book. I'm sorry but, obviously you don't have a life of your own if you have to read about mine. Okay well, let's get straight to the point. You would think that most men that carry a diary would be gay/bi I am.Shutup and stop laughing about it, or I'll use my Avada Kadabra curse, and blow your brains out, before you can say.well.whatever. So if you decide to be stupid, and read about my personal life, like you already have, then go straight ahead and be a dumbass. Just remember, that what you read hear, may scar you for the rest of your life. Don't blame me though. I didn't make you read this thing.
August 31st Oh poor, stupid Dudley waddling back and forth from the fridge, to the table, and hurting his back. It's just gross to watch his rolls jump, and quiver, as he's walking. He's never going to lose his virginity.poor guy, and even if he tries, it'll be hard enough finding his willy. Before he could even get it in, he'd probable squish the poor soul that's under him. Unless the girl is fat too.then they'd only break the bed. Okay, ew! Why am I thinking about my cousin losing his virginity when I already knows it's not gonna happen? Alright, and just looking at Aunt Petunia, and her skinny little stick figure, seeming so afraid all the time. She thought the letters popping out through the mail slot was bad? I would really like to know how Dudley got here. Maybe she just sneezed one day and he shot out. Yikes! If I were her I would have been yelling, Ready.Aim.FIRE!!! But let's not think about that right now. I got a picture from Ron the other day. He looks very sexy in that new jumper his mother made him. Yum!!! Hermoine got boobs too!!! She sent me a picture! Looks like that girl isn't so tight anymore. She's finally hit puberty.
September 1st: 2:23am Yum!!! I've been up all night looking at sexy Ron. I wonder if Draco got any hotter. His hair all slicked back. I want to make him sweat. Guys tend to look cuter when they sweat. I'll be going to school in five hours and thirty seven minutes and counting. I wonder what I'll wear. I've been thinking of spiking my hair, and wearing my purple turtle neck. Oh, I'll ask Hermoine. She's good with that stuff. Anyhow, I must sleep, and dream of Ron.
8:00am Oh no! My morning call.Hedwig. Uncle Vernon yelling at me to get my arse out of bed, and get down there. I don't understand why he gets so upset about having to bring me to King's Cross. He gets to get rid of me, and I get to get rid of him for God's sake. I see my purple turtle neck in my closet. I think it's chosen me. I'm going to look so sexy in the turtle neck, and my robes. Oh my god!!!
9:00am Alright, I'm at King's cross, and I am looking for Ron. He's there! He looks more handsome that ever! Him with his.devilish grin. "Oh my God!!! Ahhhhhh!!! It's Ronniekins, sugar pie, honey! Oh my God how are you? You're so tall, and handsome, and those shoes? Are they Prada?" Awwww! His sexy little blush. I'm going to have some fun this year. I'm getting on to the train now. Looking forward to going into that cute little washroom. Tee hee!!!
9:20am: Washroom. I've got Ronniekens in here with me. Big makeout session. He's so good with his tongue. Just how he moves it around in circles. I felt that little tingly feeling up and down my spine, and down below. I think I'm rising. Oh well.all part of the moment for me.
9:30pm I'm laying in my bed, thinking about Ronniekens, and Hermoine, and me.all together. Hmmmmm.good thoughts.
September 2nd: 6:30pm (dinner)/Ronniekens and me in Filche's closet. I didn't know that brooms could be so useful for things other than flying. Why had a bit of fun with the mop ringer outer too. I decided to take a crap on Ron's chest today. It really turned him on. We decided to use beads too. I kind of teased him a bit today. It drove him crazy.
September 3rd : Hermoine and my conversation: Direct quotes. 8:00pm Me: Hey, what are you doing? Herm: Snape wants a ten foot essay today on Wolfesbane Me: Well, isn't that about fifteen? Herm: There's nothing wrong with doing extra Me: Do you want to take a break for a little bit? Herm: What do you want to do? Me: Well I was thinking we could go up to my dormitory, and have some fun, get Ron, have some more fun, what do you think? Or are you going to pussy out again just like you did last year? Herm: I guess I could have a little fun Me: **thinks** God! I love you
8:30pm Ron, Herm and I had lots of fun today. Lot's of chocolate sauce, strawberry sauce, fondu, Strawberries, cherries, and never forgetting the cucumber which was the main thing. She decided to take out her vibrator. She actually admitted that she had one. She said it was the only way she could relieve all of the attention from school. I guess that was the reason she wasn't as tight as I thought she'd be. She's had practice. Alright so I suppose we should do this more often then. You know.fuck buddies as I would say. I hope no one walks in. Usually when the curtains are drawn, the pad is a rockin. I kind of gave him some rules to follow if the curtains were closed. If the pad is a rockin, Don't come a knockin. I think he got the point pretty quick. He never comes in, because he always knows how hard I am at work!
September 4th I actually saw Draco in the halls today. His hair isn't so gelled back. I think everyone got sexier over the summer..especially Sprout and McGonagall. Very good. Neville has lost some weight around his middle, so I guess I'd do him if I had the opportunity to, just like Snape. There are some people who just have way too much tension in their lives, and they need a way to releive it. So I suppose I'm everybody's boy toy when they need one, because I'm always there to reach out a helping hand to anyone to needs it! Heh!!! That's just me though.
September 4th Yum! Professor McGonagall has really shaped up over the summer. All the wrinkles across her forehead are gone. I think she had botox. Whatever it is, she's hot. I wonder if she has any kids though. None of the teachers seem to have kids. Dumbledore's beard has grown longer. It makes him look very masculine. Draco doesn't have such a big stick shoved up his arse anymore. Although he could, if he came with me into the shrieking shack.heh!! I think I should change it to the moaning shack though. It would make more sense since I use it for my little favors, and parties.if you know what I mean. Hermoine is a tomcat. I'm not kidding. She can go on and on and on and on and on. Ron's a little naïve boy. But I think that I could change that by the end of the school year. Professor Sprout isn't so plump this year. I guess I'd do her. It'd be fun to here her scream! "Oh yes! Harry! Definitely an A on your report on Mandrake---Oh yes!!!!" Uh oh! I suppose I went into a daze. I'll start taking notes again, because Snape had started to eye me suspiciously. He freaks me out. He definitely needs to loosen up. 4:30pm I have made a little list of Goalshis moans McGonagall Dumbledore Hagrid-Possibly Sprout Sirius Remus 10)Trewlawny-"I can tell you are going to be VERY good in bed Harry!"
I think that I can."do it".heh!!! Hermoine: two times now! My goals are beginning to be reached.
Harry's note!
Dear All Potterheads/Derranged people who like to read my personal life. You realize this is my diary. Now you realize that most "males" don't keep diaries. But Frankly.I REALLY don't care, and besides.Tom Riddle had one, so why can't I? So we'll start off with the three dimwits that I have to live with, which obviously you know about, because you read about my life.in a book. I'm sorry but, obviously you don't have a life of your own if you have to read about mine. Okay well, let's get straight to the point. You would think that most men that carry a diary would be gay/bi I am.Shutup and stop laughing about it, or I'll use my Avada Kadabra curse, and blow your brains out, before you can say.well.whatever. So if you decide to be stupid, and read about my personal life, like you already have, then go straight ahead and be a dumbass. Just remember, that what you read hear, may scar you for the rest of your life. Don't blame me though. I didn't make you read this thing.
August 31st Oh poor, stupid Dudley waddling back and forth from the fridge, to the table, and hurting his back. It's just gross to watch his rolls jump, and quiver, as he's walking. He's never going to lose his virginity.poor guy, and even if he tries, it'll be hard enough finding his willy. Before he could even get it in, he'd probable squish the poor soul that's under him. Unless the girl is fat too.then they'd only break the bed. Okay, ew! Why am I thinking about my cousin losing his virginity when I already knows it's not gonna happen? Alright, and just looking at Aunt Petunia, and her skinny little stick figure, seeming so afraid all the time. She thought the letters popping out through the mail slot was bad? I would really like to know how Dudley got here. Maybe she just sneezed one day and he shot out. Yikes! If I were her I would have been yelling, Ready.Aim.FIRE!!! But let's not think about that right now. I got a picture from Ron the other day. He looks very sexy in that new jumper his mother made him. Yum!!! Hermoine got boobs too!!! She sent me a picture! Looks like that girl isn't so tight anymore. She's finally hit puberty.
September 1st: 2:23am Yum!!! I've been up all night looking at sexy Ron. I wonder if Draco got any hotter. His hair all slicked back. I want to make him sweat. Guys tend to look cuter when they sweat. I'll be going to school in five hours and thirty seven minutes and counting. I wonder what I'll wear. I've been thinking of spiking my hair, and wearing my purple turtle neck. Oh, I'll ask Hermoine. She's good with that stuff. Anyhow, I must sleep, and dream of Ron.
8:00am Oh no! My morning call.Hedwig. Uncle Vernon yelling at me to get my arse out of bed, and get down there. I don't understand why he gets so upset about having to bring me to King's Cross. He gets to get rid of me, and I get to get rid of him for God's sake. I see my purple turtle neck in my closet. I think it's chosen me. I'm going to look so sexy in the turtle neck, and my robes. Oh my god!!!
9:00am Alright, I'm at King's cross, and I am looking for Ron. He's there! He looks more handsome that ever! Him with his.devilish grin. "Oh my God!!! Ahhhhhh!!! It's Ronniekins, sugar pie, honey! Oh my God how are you? You're so tall, and handsome, and those shoes? Are they Prada?" Awwww! His sexy little blush. I'm going to have some fun this year. I'm getting on to the train now. Looking forward to going into that cute little washroom. Tee hee!!!
9:20am: Washroom. I've got Ronniekens in here with me. Big makeout session. He's so good with his tongue. Just how he moves it around in circles. I felt that little tingly feeling up and down my spine, and down below. I think I'm rising. Oh well.all part of the moment for me.
9:30pm I'm laying in my bed, thinking about Ronniekens, and Hermoine, and me.all together. Hmmmmm.good thoughts.
September 2nd: 6:30pm (dinner)/Ronniekens and me in Filche's closet. I didn't know that brooms could be so useful for things other than flying. Why had a bit of fun with the mop ringer outer too. I decided to take a crap on Ron's chest today. It really turned him on. We decided to use beads too. I kind of teased him a bit today. It drove him crazy.
September 3rd : Hermoine and my conversation: Direct quotes. 8:00pm Me: Hey, what are you doing? Herm: Snape wants a ten foot essay today on Wolfesbane Me: Well, isn't that about fifteen? Herm: There's nothing wrong with doing extra Me: Do you want to take a break for a little bit? Herm: What do you want to do? Me: Well I was thinking we could go up to my dormitory, and have some fun, get Ron, have some more fun, what do you think? Or are you going to pussy out again just like you did last year? Herm: I guess I could have a little fun Me: **thinks** God! I love you
8:30pm Ron, Herm and I had lots of fun today. Lot's of chocolate sauce, strawberry sauce, fondu, Strawberries, cherries, and never forgetting the cucumber which was the main thing. She decided to take out her vibrator. She actually admitted that she had one. She said it was the only way she could relieve all of the attention from school. I guess that was the reason she wasn't as tight as I thought she'd be. She's had practice. Alright so I suppose we should do this more often then. You know.fuck buddies as I would say. I hope no one walks in. Usually when the curtains are drawn, the pad is a rockin. I kind of gave him some rules to follow if the curtains were closed. If the pad is a rockin, Don't come a knockin. I think he got the point pretty quick. He never comes in, because he always knows how hard I am at work!
September 4th I actually saw Draco in the halls today. His hair isn't so gelled back. I think everyone got sexier over the summer..especially Sprout and McGonagall. Very good. Neville has lost some weight around his middle, so I guess I'd do him if I had the opportunity to, just like Snape. There are some people who just have way too much tension in their lives, and they need a way to releive it. So I suppose I'm everybody's boy toy when they need one, because I'm always there to reach out a helping hand to anyone to needs it! Heh!!! That's just me though.
September 4th Yum! Professor McGonagall has really shaped up over the summer. All the wrinkles across her forehead are gone. I think she had botox. Whatever it is, she's hot. I wonder if she has any kids though. None of the teachers seem to have kids. Dumbledore's beard has grown longer. It makes him look very masculine. Draco doesn't have such a big stick shoved up his arse anymore. Although he could, if he came with me into the shrieking shack.heh!! I think I should change it to the moaning shack though. It would make more sense since I use it for my little favors, and parties.if you know what I mean. Hermoine is a tomcat. I'm not kidding. She can go on and on and on and on and on. Ron's a little naïve boy. But I think that I could change that by the end of the school year. Professor Sprout isn't so plump this year. I guess I'd do her. It'd be fun to here her scream! "Oh yes! Harry! Definitely an A on your report on Mandrake---Oh yes!!!!" Uh oh! I suppose I went into a daze. I'll start taking notes again, because Snape had started to eye me suspiciously. He freaks me out. He definitely needs to loosen up. 4:30pm I have made a little list of Goalshis moans McGonagall Dumbledore Hagrid-Possibly Sprout Sirius Remus 10)Trewlawny-"I can tell you are going to be VERY good in bed Harry!"
I think that I can."do it".heh!!! Hermoine: two times now! My goals are beginning to be reached.
