Yet You Still Smile
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A/N: A one shot. This just came into my head late one night..on a school's night. I just HAD to write it. It kept blabbling and blabbling and blabbing until my mentality kicked me in my the arse and told me to just write it before I went too far into insanity. My head hurts from the craziness and randomness in this fic. But I guess I had fun writing this piece of ...random thoughts. Mwuahahah! This is a Ran/Ken fic so beware. DUNDUNDUNDUN If ya don't like it then why the heck did you click on this for anyway? (cough)dumb(cough) -ahem- Anywho, comments are much appreciated and flames will be used to warm me in the winter. It gets a tad cold. Eh, first piece EVER on this so I don't know if it'll be any good. Not much confidence but as long as I'm having fun who cares right?? mushshshsh, right This sets in first person view and ..uh...ALOT of mistakes..; oh wellies... >.> .... Anyway, Enjoy!!
Disclaimer: spasms If only..-flops around- I owned... -digs face into ground- Ran and Ken...-is now bruised and bloody- the greatness in that.
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Tears fell down from my eyes. Blood graced my lips. There he was, slumping over me. A dagger plunged into his back, hitting his vital organs. Why did he save me? What am I to him? What did I do to deserve this? ...How can he still smile? He's loosing all his strength as he begins to slump onto me. I cannot do anything but let him fall. My arms open as he falls into my embrace and I cling to him desperately. The only thing I see is blood. Dark, rich, crimson blood, soaked into his clothing. I never understood how he was always like this. His soft, chocolate brown eyes are half-lidded now; a bit dazed..yet, he's still smiling.
I hold him in my arms, my violet orbs searching for his soul in his. I've been shunning him away. Ignoring, insulting, purposely betraying the feelings I hold deep inside my own heart. Why is he so stupid as to try over and over again? His stubborn attitude and obnoxious, yet adorably cute personality always manages to, at least, brush me. He has never left me unscathed before..now he'll scar me forever.
His hand is reaching up to touch my face, my cheek. My own hand instinctively reach up to cover his own. My cheek is moist....and covered in blood. Tears? How long has it been since I have last cried? Why do I cry now? He gives a pained cry and breathes heavily. I do not know what to do but pull him into my lap and cradle his lithe form. I am crying. For him? ...Most definitely. How clich'e this is. My love is dying before my eyes and I haven't made my confession.
I wonder, is this the end? Lord knows that I will not live past this day. He could have lived. I am wounded, I wouldn't have made it to the exit in time. He, on the other hand, could have dashed out of here and lived on to see tomorrow. But instead he covered me from the bloody bastard who yearned for my death. I couldn't move out of the way, they had paralyzed my legs. I was useless as I am now. Damn him. Why couldn't you just go on without me? You stayed by my side and now you'll pay the price of going into a place of darkness..with me. Yet you're still smiling ..at me.
You're such an idiot. I hate how you always try to pursuade me into doing whatever stupid and idiotic thing you're doing. Always dragging me along with you to every single place you go. Always trying to pick fights with me when you know I would most likely not take the bait. You've always wanted me to be with the rest of you....even when I would give you a nonchalant answer or completely ignore you; refusing. Why are your arms encircling my neck now? Why am I holding you closer? You have tears on your face...yet you're still smiling.
Do you always have to grin? I know you have pain. You never show it though. Don't you know it's ok to show your sorrow to me? I would never cast you away as you think many of us will if you let your mask slip. But, you look really...happy and content. You do know you are dying, right? ...This pains me. It is my fault that you have to die. Why didn't you just go?! Why couldn't you just leave me here!? ......I don't want you to slip away yet. You're still smiling.
I have an urge to slap and kiss you at the same time. I'm clutching onto you now. I hope that I'm not crushing you, but most likely I am. Your arms...are loosing their grip. Don't go. Not yet. I pull back a little to look at your face. The smoke is interfering though. I can feel the flames licking around us. Maybe we'll die before we have to suffer from the burns... They locked us in. I only hope that the other two got our damned to-be muderers. You're smiling, gazing at me with those unresistable chocolate brown eyes. Your tears are streaming down your cheeks. But you don't seem to mind as you tilt your head up towards mine. Your hand reaches up to touch my scarlet hair and I do nothing but stare at you. At how this pains me in knowing this is my fault. At knowing...I caused your death. Still, you smile as your lips press onto mine.
I close my eyes and return the pressure of our lips just before I feel your hand gently caressing my hair go limp. I pull back once again. My chest tightening in agony. Your body is weak now, and the smoke is clogging our lungs. I can still see you, your eyes, your honeynut colored hair, and brilliant golden skin. We are the complete oppisites yet you've chosen me. You've made the most completely selfless sacrifice for me. Your eyes are beginning to go dim. They're not bright anymore.....just like someone turned off the switch and you were going out quickly. Your body is in my vice-like grip and your head is supported on my shoulder. I bury my face into your neck and I just hold onto you. As though if I let you go I would never be able to you hold you in my arms again. The pain...it hurts so much. You could've lived on ...without me. I would die without this guilt, just the content feeling of knowing that the only person who had broken through my shell was still alive. But no...it's my fault you're dying. Why are you still smiling? You're looking at me and your lips part.
"It's not your fault...Ran."
My eyes open wide. You've always known how to read my mind. How was it that you did that? Your chocolate eyes....they've shut. Permeanately? My grasp on you has tightened if possible. I smile bitterly and lay down on my back. The debris from the building is starting to fall now. Your spirit has already left your body and my eyes are beginning to hurt from the smog and tears. Although knowing you, your stupid spirit is waiting somewhere for me. I chuckle in irony as I pull your body on top of mine; as if you were just sleeping..and not dead. My arms embrace your body as the darkness begins to pull me in. I'm sleepy and I can feel death's grip on me. I'm going to die crying. Isn't that ironic? I'm feeling my last breath leave my body and I steal one last glance at you before my own amethyst eyes slide shut. " ..Ken.." And yet, you're still smiling.
Fin
...or tbc??