I'm back! Thank you for your patience while I got my ducks in a row to write my sequel to Pride Goes Before the Fall. If you are new to this fic, welcome! It is not required that you read Pride Goes Before the Fall to understand this fic (as long as you've played the games!), but I always recommend it :) Otherwise, feel free to jump on in. I'll try to catch you up with a little summary below. This story is a rewrite of ME2 with a couple of twists thrown in, just to keep it interesting.

This fic is being beta'ed by the lovely AnneRene. She keeps my plotlines on track and my grammar correct. Thank you!

All copyright belongs to Bioware; I'm just taking a spin through their universe.

When we last heard from the Normandy's crew, they were being sent out to do some reconnaissance on pockets of geth resistance. Garrus had been discharged from C-Sec and requested a transfer to the Normandy. Shepard saw her son Nate from a distance, still ignorant that Shepard is his mother, and left him to the care of his father, Cleon. Mymene T'Neis, Captain of the Destiny Ascension, was revealed to be an agent of the Shadow Broker interested in gaining Shepard's alliance after Socrates' botched attempt to force the Spectre's hand. And the Illusive Man reached out to Shepard, offering friendship-which she is not planning to accept. And on we go...

Chapter 1

They stood looking out over the Presidium, watching the leisurely stroll of the different races around them. Two asari matrons chatted as they passed, elegantly dressed in blue and red. A hanar floated by gracefully, glowing softly. No one paid any attention to the human woman and her turian companion standing on the bridge.

It was perfect.

Marion Shepard turned to face Garrus, a gentler smile on her face than he could remember seeing. Most people only ever saw the reputation or were wary of the scars that dotted her cheek and lips. A flash of those grey blue eyes was usually enough to send those interested packing. But Garrus Vakarian wasn't most turians. Hell, he wasn't most people.

He let one hand trace her cheek softly and he smiled as she leaned into his hand. Her coy grin made his heart pound in anticipation.

"How much more time do we have on shore leave?" she asked, one eyebrow arched.

"As much as you want, Spectre," he replied with a chuckle. "There are perks to being the only human Spectre…and to being on her crew."

Shepard's laugh was hearty and genuine; he preferred it to the tinkling giggle so many human females seemed to have. She gripped his hand tightly, suddenly pulling him along the bridge.

"That was the right answer, Vakarian."

"Vakarian."

"VAKARIAN!"

Garrus jumped up, leaping out of his pod.

"Sorry, sergeant!" His feet found parade rest even as his sleep muddled mind fought to wake. Then he remembered where he was, and who he was talking to.

The real Commander Shepard stood in front of him, arms crossed and expression bemused. Her thick black hair was pulled back into her customary bun; her black crew outfit made her blend into the shadows of the dim bunk room. She cleared her throat.

"Having a good dream?" she asked, one eyebrow raised.

"You could say that," he said, his voice deep and throaty, still heavy with sleep. Shepard swallowed and stepped back with a sigh.

"The ship's computerized alarms were going haywire. Swiff is working on it, but I figured you'd want to eat before you have to leave so…" She trailed off, realizing that her already thin excuse was wearing thinner. Garrus' mandibles twitched as he tried to suppress a grin.

They both understood the necessity of regulations and keeping the chain of command intact, which meant limited time alone. Their shore leave had been brief, something they both dreamed about. But back on board the Normandy SR-1, Rin had become Commander Shepard again, human Spectre. And Garrus Vakarian had become an attaché to the crew, advising her and serving on the ground team as a representative of the turian Hierarchy. They had helped to build the Normandy in the first place after all. She was his commanding officer and in the heightened tensions following the attack of Sovereign and the geth on the Citadel, they had both felt it necessary to keep their budding relationship in the shadows.

That didn't mean they had to like it. Shore leave had been equal parts restful and stressful. Garrus had held her up, taking her to the shooting range, going to see a new turian production, letting her rant and scream over the Shadow Broker and Nate and the Reapers and the stupidity of the Council. At night, curled up against his chest, she had twitched in her dreams and he heard murmurings of ship names: the Alliance ships that had been lost when she had decided to save the Council.

How she had been able to compartmentalize that was beyond him. Now she looked at him with barely a trace of shadows in her eyes. Glancing around, Shepard stepped forward, close enough that he could feel the heat of her. He swallowed and then smiled. Once that grin of sharp teeth would have been off putting. Now Shepard knew the kind of mischief that smile promised. She chuckled and leaned up on her toes for a quick peck on his rough cheek.

"The cruiser should be here in an hour," she said, the smile fading from her lips. "The Gothis can take you back to the Citadel so you can clear everything with the embassy."

"I wish I could have just taken care of this during our shore leave," he grumbled. "Blasted red tape. I'll be glad when my discharge papers are finally processed and transferred."

"You're not the only one," said Shepard dryly. "By the time you've taken care of it and gotten your papers for the Normandy, I'll be back on the Citadel. We'll be able to outfit the Normandy and meet with the Council, figure out our next steps."

"I like this our business." He grinned, his blue eyes twinkling.

She pushed him. "Don't start with me, Vakarian," she warned, though she could not help her smile. "You use that deep voice, romantic crap and Joker is going to have a field day."

She was making her way toward the door but he reached out and grabbed her hand, pulling her quickly to him. It made him grin wider to know she could escape him if she wanted to, but she let him pull her against his chest.

"You know, there's only one way I know of to make a turian stop talking," he said quietly, his mandibles flapping slightly with amusement.

Shepard chuckled and placed one hand on the side of his face.

"You are relentless," she whispered. Rising up on her toes, her lips met his as his arms wrapped around her waist. He sighed into her mouth, enjoying the heat of her lined up against him. For her part, Shepard had decided there was pretty much nothing she enjoyed more than feeling his smooth, cool lips on hers...unless it was having his lips move down her neck, like he was attempting now. She chuckled, half-groaning as she pulled away.

"Ok, your daily torture is over. The sooner you leave, the sooner I get to come find you again."

"You're no fun."

Shepard grinned. "That's not what you said the other night."

She left him laughing, trying to smooth the smile from her own face. By the time she walked past another crewman, she felt herself slip back into Commander Shepard. Sometimes, she couldn't tell which version of herself she truly was: the one who stood on the bridge or the one who wished to be back down with Garrus. Maybe someday, she'd get to be both.

Up on the bridge, cup of coffee in hand, Shepard leaned against Joker's chair, watching the scanner. "Let me guess? Nothing," she said, sipping her coffee.

"Hey, I don't need you doing my job, Commander. It's boring enough as it is," replied Joker, smirking as she growled.

"A whole goddamn month now we've been out here. 'Clearing pockets of geth resistance.' We've encountered them, what, four times this whole month? And nothing this last week: no geth and no sign of those missing ships. The Alliance bought the Council time to prepare for the Reapers, figure out how to stop them. Not to give them time to pretty up their Citadel for a bit before it gets blown to pieces and to find excuses to keep me out of their hair…or crests."

Joker slightly turned in his chair, one eyebrow raised. "Wow, you really are a ray of sunshine in the morning. Isn't coffee supposed to help with that?"

Shepard glared. She was supposed to have returned to the Citadel three days ago. She was supposed to be with Garrus. Instead, she was still here, contemplating how far she could push her Spectre powers to ignore her Alliance directive to finish searching this system. But the mystery of the missing ships called to her. Four ships had disappeared in this system in the last two weeks: no distress call, no debris. They had just vanished. Her instinct told her she needed to investigate but the annoying part of her centered somewhere in her chest wanted her to head right back to the Citadel. Just then her omnitool pinged.

"Save some more of those for when I'm fully caffeinated, Joker. We'll see who's laughing then."

Joker just waved her off as she walked down the bridge, opening up her messages. She paused in the CIC when she saw it was from Cleon. They had spoken three times since her team had rescued Cleon and Nate from the Shadow Broker's agent, Socrates. Physically, she knew they had both recovered. Mentally, her son would suffer for much longer, having lost the only mother he had ever known. Cleon, Shepard's teenage love, still had not forgiven her for the loss of his sister.

Still, he was attempting to pick up the pieces and Shepard had to commend him for that. He had written her the week before, letting her know that he had told Nate the truth. He was Nate's father and had been too young (and stupid, thought Shepard) for him to take care of Nate himself. So his sister Kate had taken Nate in and raised him as her own, while Cleon pretended to be an uncle when he came back into Nate's life later. Confusing, to say the least. The last thing their son needed was the other piece of the puzzle: that the famous Commander Shepard, the woman Nate had once idolized, was actually his mother. The same woman who Nate now hated with every fiber of his small body. His hero had not come to save him and his family as promised, and his mother had died. Now more than ever, Shepard was convinced that the right thing was for her to stay as far away from her family as possible.

Cleon's note was again brief. But the few words he gave her still made her clench her fists in frustration.

Marion,

We're leaving. Nate and I need to figure things out together and get away from here. We've booked passage on a transport heading to a newly opened colony. This will be the last contact we have for a while. We don't need your protection anymore. We're going somewhere where no one will know us or know our connection to you. We'll be safe. Good bye.

Cleon.

Shepard's jaw clenched, her first reaction instinctual. How dare he take her son away?

And then she reminded herself. 'You are not his mother. You made sure of that when you almost killed him with your biotics. Maybe Cleon is right. Maybe being on a faraway colony is exactly what will keep them safe.'

She closed the message, loosening her grip on her cup to take another sip, screwing up her face at the lukewarm contents. A deep breath helped to refocus her on the day's task. By the end of this week, they would be done with this system and she could head back to the Citadel. Garrus had sent her a message the day before, saying he had received his discharge papers from C-Sec and was working with the turian embassy to get his transfer to Shepard's command. Once she was back on the Citadel, she'd be able to move the process along a little faster.

Her thoughts drifted to the meeting with the Council she had scheduled for next week. She wanted to get them to see that their next step needed to be hunting down all the beacons that they could find. Liara was already working on that. The young archaeologist had left the Normandy on Shepard's orders, following leads on the beacons…and on the Shadow Broker. And Cerberus. Shepard sighed. The Broker was personal, she knew that. Cerberus was a strange mix: a true threat and one that had affected her past. But the physical and emotional scars from Akuze weren't something to be ignored. And if the 'Illusive Man' thought she was going to be working with them (what kind of a name was that, anyway?'), he had another thing coming.

Tali'Zorah, the quarian who had been a part of Shepard's team, had returned briefly to the Migrant Fleet to report on her doings from her Pilgrimage and to become a full-fledged member of the Fleet. She hoped to work on the quarians through her father, an admiral in the Fleet, and to eventually join Liara in her research. Shepard was grateful for their support, even if they weren't an official part of her crew anymore.

Shepard turned to the galaxy map, heading for the short set of stairs to look down on the model of the galaxy. It had always fascinated her: the swirling colors, the stars and planets just waiting to be explored, to be helped. Shepard had grown up among the stars. It was like a painting of home.

Just then, a proximity alarm sounded. Shepard frowned, pausing at one of the consoles to pull up the localized scanners. "Joker, what have we got?" she asked over the comm.

"Uh, Commander." The cockiness was gone from Joker's voice. Her head shot up from the console. Without even pausing, she released her cup of coffee, barely hearing it hit the ground as she suddenly ran for the cockpit.

"What is it? Geth?" she asked, looking out the windows of the Normandy.

"No. I don't think it's the geth," Joker said quietly, his eyes fixated on the large shape blocking out the rising sun over Alchera.

Navigator Pressley was suddenly beside her, running through idents. "It's a cruiser, but it's not matching any known signatures," he said. "Do you recognize it, Commander?"

Shepard squinted but the design was hard to make out in the sunlight. It was massive, larger than any ship she had ever seen, except for Sovereign. But this ship almost looked like it had been carved from rock. It was both primitive and advanced. "No," she answered slowly. "But I think we found the answer to our missing ship problem."

"Commander, that thing has us on an intercept trajectory," said Joker, eyeing it suspiciously. "And it's not responding to any of our hails."

Shepard leaned into the comm. "All hands on deck and at their stations. Move! Joker, patch me through." Watching the ship, she said, "This is Commander Shepard of the Human Systems Alliance, Council Spectre, in command of the SSV Normandy. Identify yourself."

No answer, just static. "This is Commander Shepard of the SSV Normandy. Identify yourself and halt your approach or we will be forced to fire."

Again, no answer. Shepard's face was grim as she said, "Joker, ready weapons. If they get much closer, we'll fire a warning shot."

She began her warning again.

Her voice died in her throat as the screens all began to flash red. Her brow furrowed as a strange creature appeared for only a moment. She saw a triangular shaped head and multiple arms. A vision flashed through her head and her stomach dropped. This thing was familiar, and not in a good way.

"Joker, get us out of here," she said very quietly. "Do it, now."

His fingers moved across the screens but the ship did not move. "Commander, we're all locked up. They've gotten into our systems!"

"That's impossible!" scoffed Pressley, though his eyes were wide with fear. "This is the most advanced ship in Citadel space!"

"I don't think they're from Citadel space," whispered Shepard. "Do something, Joker!"

"I'm trying," he shouted back. Then his eyes caught on the ship. "Shit! They're firing!"

The golden glow that gathered at the point of the massive ship seemed to take forever to fire. And yet it was only a moment before that laser was bearing down on them.

"Brace yourselves!" Shepard ordered over the comm, hurling herself into the co-pilot's chair.

The blast struck them broadside, making the whole ship shudder. The shields went out like a puff of smoke. Alarms sounded through the bridge, explosions clearly heard throughout the ship, the screams of her crew punching through her gut. Shepard's ears were ringing and she seemed to be bleeding where her teeth had bitten through her lower lip. Turning to Joker, she saw he was still working with single-minded determination. A glance behind her showed Pressley on the floor, blood pooling beneath his head, his eyes glassy in death. Behind him, the CIC was in chaos. Shepard stared, her mind numbing in shock. There was fire everywhere, cracks beginning to show in the ceiling. Shepard swallowed. The atmospheric shielding wouldn't last forever.

Suddenly Joker crowed. "I've got some thrusters back! Brace for evasive maneuvers!"

"I'm going to gather the crew," she yelled over the din. "Activate the escape pods. We're abandoning ship."

She didn't wait for a response. She stumbled up and over Pressley's body, running down the bridge, falling to the side as an explosion rocked the ship. A new recruit ran past her, tears streaming down her face, heading for the escape pod. Shepard saw the tell-tale leak beside her and reached out a hand. Her cry of 'no' was drowned out in the sudden explosion. Shepard was thrown backwards, landing in a heap amongst chairs and other debris. Sharp pain lanced through her side. Ears still ringing, she glanced down and saw blood dripping from a gash across the right side of her chest.

"I am not dying from blood loss while my ship burns around me," she muttered through gritted teeth.

Hauling herself to her feet, she searched for the young soldier. She found her crumpled beneath debris, a sheet of metal piercing the ensign's chest. Shepard swallowed tightly and stood up, heading for the stairs and repeating her order to head for the escape pods. A calmness gripped her that only ever appeared during an immediate crisis. Still, her mind swirled around the familiar image from the screen; the Prothean Cipher in her head recognized the shape but could not give her a name. But Shepard knew one thing: if the Cipher recognized it as bad, then it had to be connected to the Reapers. And they were not ready to fight a Reaper alone.

She leaped down the last five stairs, dodging debris and other crewmen. Flinging herself at her locker, Shepard grabbed her hardsuit, strapping in as quickly as possible. The onboard computer immediately assessed her physical damage and she felt the sweet relief of medigel as the suit's small needles sunk into her body.

"Commander!" Ashley Williams appeared around the corner, pulling on her helmet as she ran. "Is it geth?"

"Unknown," said Shepard, pulling on her gauntlets. "The Normandy's been badly hit. We're abandoning ship. I'm going to set off the distress beacon. Get everyone you can to the life pods."

"Aye, aye Skip. I'll be back once everyone is evacuated."

"No you will not!" Shepard said fiercely. "Get everyone else left on this deck into a pod, including yourself. I'll be right behind you."

Still, Ashley hesitated. "Shepard…you are coming, right?"

Shepard grinned, pulling on her helmet. "Today is not my day, Ash. I'll see you groundside. Now move."

Ashley nodded and took off. Shepard turned, heading for the distress beacon. A small fire had sprung up around it and she grabbed the closest extinguisher, focusing on the task at hand. Not on the false bravado she had felt talking to Ashley. Not on the combination of panic and gratitude that Garrus was not here with her. Not on the lingering sense that she was never going to see Nate again.

The fire out, Shepard tapped into the console, activating the beacon and sending it shooting off into space. "Joker, it's time to go! Get into the pod by the cockpit. I've launched the distress beacon."

"Negative, Commander," he replied over the comm. "I'm getting control of the Normandy back. I can save her! We need to give everyone more time to get off the ship!"

"They're getting off now and so are you! I'm coming up there," she threatened and signed off. She began to run again, determined to haul his fragile ass into the pod herself. Opening the door to the CIC, her mag locks engaged and Shepard gaped. The ceiling had given way and floated off into space. There was no longer an atmosphere to the CIC: debris floated all around her, the consoles dead and silent. It was a sight she had never expected to see. The blackness of space threatened to envelope her and she looked down, concentrating on her boots, the mag locks keeping her grounded. "Goddamnit, goddamnit, goddamnit," she muttered, forcing herself to move forward, pushing aside the floating debris.

Pushing through the little bit of shielding left around Joker's cockpit, she snapped, "What the hell are you doing? I gave the order to abandon ship. That shot cut through the Normandy like butter!"

"I'm regaining control from their hacking. I can save her, get her down on Alchera," Joker shouted back, his eyes wide and frantic as his hands moved across the flickering screens.

Shepard said something she hoped her mother would never hear and then reached out, literally yanking Joker from his seat. He yelped, clutching his hat as he stumbled out of his seat. "Hey, watch the arm!"

"Oh, now you're worried about getting hurt?" she barked. "You better hope we don't make it out of this, because I am going to kick your ass when we get out of here."

"Promises, promises!" They limped toward the pod when Joker froze. "Holy shit. Commander, they're coming around for another pass!"

They both looked up through the broken shell of the Normandy. The strange ship was moving toward them again, and that golden bead was gathering. Shepard's heart just about stopped and she ran, dragging Joker with her. "Go, go, go!" she yelled, slamming her hand against the door. It slid open and she deposited Joker inside, making sure he was strapped in. In that moment, she paused and looked above her. She saw it coming for her, the shot that would destroy them all. Lunging backward, she threw herself against the side of the hull. The beam passed just before her, sending off heat and sparks.

"Shepard!" Joker shouted. Through the haze, she could see him moving inside the pod.

"Stay there, Joker!" she ordered. "I'm coming."

His eyes were wide but his face set. He was going to leave the pod to come help her, even as the force of the beam knocked her mag locks loose. There really was only one choice.

Having her decision made actually helped to slow her pounding heart. She was not going to agonize over this. She floated around the edge, avoiding a small explosion triggered by the beam. Her fingers reached for the panel on the wall.

"Shepard, no!"

Their eyes met for just a moment. Shepard grit her teeth.

"Don't stop fighting."

Then she hit the panel. The door slid shut and the pod shot away from the Normandy. He was as safe as she could make him.

Shepard turned over in mid-air to stare at the beam. It was beautiful in a way, its power deadly, its source mysterious. It sliced through her home like it was a piece of tin foil, and not the most powerful ship in the Alliance Navy.

Suddenly there was a larger explosion triggered by the firing of the beam. She saw the rushing heat and smoke coming at her and tried to bring up a biotic barrier to protect herself. It stopped some of the heat but she felt the protection evaporate with a gasp. Her body slammed into a bulkhead and then she was spinning. Swallowing tightly, her heart suddenly pounding all over again, Shepard forced herself to open her eyes.

The corpse of the Normandy was drifting away from her…or was she drifting away from it? It was hard to tell. The ship was breaking apart now, pieces of it crumbling away. Tears pricked her eyes and then began to flow more steadily. Somewhere out there, her holo of infant Nate was spinning away into the darkness. He was truly gone.

Anger hotter than she had ever known suddenly coursed through her body and she screamed into the void, her eyes narrowed to slits as she stared at this unknown ship. She would figure out who they were, their connection to the Reapers. And she would destroy them.

As she tried to draw breath from her scream, the air felt thin. Difficult to fill her lungs. Her onboard computer suddenly flashed before her eyes, showing a rapidly dropping level of oxygen. She struggled, pure survival instinct kicking in. Reaching back, she could feel where the connection to her suit had become detached. Her oxygen was leaking. She was going to suffocate. Breathing quickly and shallowly, Shepard forced herself to stop struggling, giving her mind a moment to come to terms with what was happening.

'I'm dying,' she thought to herself, and the idea was shocking. Was this truly it? After all the deadly situations she had faced, this was what she finally could not conquer? She was briefly bewildered. But she had told Ashley and Garrus she'd see them again. She was supposed to meet with the Council next week. She was not ready to go. Could she use her biotics? Try to lash herself to the ship? But what good would that do? It was going down, and so was she.

Her mind jumped around to many things: the sound of her father's laughter, the day she had put on her uniform, holding Nate for the first time, using her biotics, encountering the Reaper on Virmire, seeing Garrus Vakarian in the Presidium. She let her mind linger there. Nate was safe with Cleon. Her crew and Councilor Anderson would keep up the fight against the Reapers. But Garrus…they were unfinished. There was so much more to say, to do, to fight about! Their relationship so far had been light and fun, with moments of intensity so bright Shepard knew they would blaze in her memory, well, for as long as she had a memory.

Could they have become something more? She thought so. But now she would never know.

Shepard didn't want to spend her last few minutes on regret. Fingers trembling, she activated her omni tool.

"This is Commander Shepard. The Normandy has been attacked by an unknown enemy; I ordered the crew to abandon ship. During evacuation, I became separated from the ship and my hardsuit became compromised." She sucked in a slow, shallow breath and continued. "Find the beacons. Learn everything you can. We slowed down the Reapers, but don't believe for a second we stopped them. You have…have to stop them."

The air was getting harder to take in, her vision starting to swim. Her heart was pounding and she gasped, her voice gone. Nate, Ashley, Liara, Tali—Garrus. Her lips fought to form his name but her whisper was soundless. She had—feelings for him. She was dying, she could let herself ponder that for a moment. She couldn't put a name to the emotions that swirled through her at the thought of Garrus. It was too hard to come to terms with the fact that she might be falling in love with a turian. Having so little oxygen wasn't helping the matter. She was bemused by the thought of falling in love. This galaxy was a strange place.

Her vision was the next to go. She drifted in this strange semi-conscious space, lungs constricting, body seizing from lack of air. But she fought to embrace a sense of peace as she faded out of existence, ignoring the niggling sense of dissatisfaction that something had been left unsaid.

And so we begin! Thanks for reading. Thoughts, comments, suggestions are always welcome as reviews. I really appreciate you taking the time to read and supporting me as I plow through this massive game. Next up, some of our favorites react to the news of Shepard's death. My plan is to update every 7-10 days and try to make each chapter a little longer than the ones from the last fic.

Buckle in everyone. It's going to be a bumpy ride for Shep and the gang. See you next week!