A/N: Yay, a new fic! I've been on hibernation for these past months, so I hope you enjoy my comeback. I know this is way, way behind the manga, but I still haven't gotten over the Infinity arc drama. So here goes. Read and review, tout le monde!
To say that Infinity was the worst city they have ever landed on would be the understatement of the century.
This was probably the only place wherein the plain act of walking was dangerous, Kurogane thought as he trotted the narrow alleys of the city. It was a little early into the evening, perhaps around 9, but the streets were already deserted. A light drizzle poured on the city, and the only lights that were alive were those of the fading orbs of the lamp posts. The evening was foggy and the moon seemed content in hiding beneath the dark clouds that hovered above the already sleeping city. There were a few people here and there, consist mostly of drunks puking their insides out and prostitutes clad in blacks and metals smoking god-knows-what. Not at all a place suitable for his surrogate family to tread on.
Should the boy go out into the city at this hour, he probably might be bullied. But that, Kurogane reminded himself, was not the real reason why the kid couldn't go out. It's not a question whether he could protect himself because he knew the boy could. Rather, it was because the princess would fret. Despite the way she treated this new 'Syaoran', everyone knew that deep inside she still cared a lot about him.
Should the princess go out… Hell. As if any of them would even let her out.
Should the mage go instead, Infinity would still prove to be a dangerous path, considering that he had just lost a considerable amount of power and that he was still recuperating. Besides, a lot of drunks might want to make out with him, which would just be foul.
And so, he, being the one most capable at the time, volunteered to do the shopping for their food and necessities. A half an hour walk from the scanty shop and he finally could view their lodging from a distance.
"Damn drizzle," he muttered under his breath as he neared the door, the very short distance not at all hindering him from cursing the wretched weather. After all, with the ambiance they were currently living with, it is never too late to curse.
"Welcome home, Kurogane-san," the princess greeted him with fake cheer. He shrugged.
Everything they had now was just fake.
"I've already taken a few bites a while ago. Help yourselves," he said as 'Syaoran' took the bag from him and settled it on the table. The princess followed him.
Kurogane sat himself down on the divan across the room, facing the dining table. The children and the pork bun were gathered around the table, eating in silence. It was a few minutes later that the princess voiced out what they had all been thinking.
"How about Fai-san? Should I call him?"
At that, nobody spoke.
Kurogane saw the princess cast her eyes downward, while the pork bun nestled uncomfortably in her bosom. The kid was starting a staring game with his food. Kurogane stood up.
"I'll do it."
Kurogane leaned against the wall of the room, his arms folded and his crimson eyes staring at the mage's silhouette. Said mage was lying on his side on the bed, his back to the ninja. The room was bathed in darkness, and Kurogane instantly noticed that everything else in the room remained untouched, except for the bed.
"Oy," he said, his voice reverberating throughout the room, breaking the poignant silence.
Fai didn't seem to hear.
"Don't pretend you're asleep now, mage. You hardly ever sleep nowadays," he said matter-of-factly.
"Did you never learn how to knock?" Fai's cold voice retorted, not at all in response to Kurogane's statement.
"That is not the point," the ninja growled.
"So the point is?" the mage responded, his voice a venomous tone. He sat down and removed the covers.
"Drink."
"No," came the quick reply.
Kurogane unfolded his arms as he began to walk towards the mage's bed. He still didn't understand why despite the fact that he knew what Fai would instantly reply, he persisted. This, in fact, was becoming an old game and both of them were already veterans. He would offer, Fai would resist, he would persist, Fai would refuse. And in the end, he always let Fai get his way. Most of the time, that is, if the mage was still strong enough to refuse drinking.
"Stop being so stubborn," he complained, irritation evident.
"When has refusing an offer become a crime?" Fai retorted, still unmoving.
"Look at yourself!"
"I don't give a damn to how I look, Kurogane."
"I do."
Silence.
"Leave me alone," Fai ordered, his one golden eye piercing sharply through the darkness.
Kurogane stood in front of Fai.
"Why do you have to make this so hard? Look here, mage. If there had been another way, I would have opted for that. But since this," he bent down, slipped his index finger through Fai's metal collar ring and tugged at it, pulling Fai's face forward so that they were only a few inches away, "is the only way, the only option, then I chose this. And let me tell you. I'm not sorry for letting you live," he continued. Fai looked away.
"Leave me alone."
A few seconds passed by, and Kurogane slowly released his grip on Fai's collar. He stood up and turned his back to the mage, his anger starting to get the better of him.
"Don't think for a second that you're the only one suffering, you selfish jerk. The kid. The princess. Even that damn pork bun. Everybody is. Don't make things harder for them. For yourself," he uttered quietly, his eyes glinting with anger.
"Then stop adding me to your burden list! Why don't you just go and mind your own business?" Fai asked, his voice raising an octave higher.
"What part of the stupid deal can't you understand?! You are my business!" Kurogane shouted.
"Take me out of your business. Just go. Leave me alone, Kurogane." Fai replied.
His eye cast downward, and he turned to face the wall instead.
"Fine." He heard Kurogane mutter one last time before the door of his room slammed and he was once again bathing in darkness.
Kurogane sat at the edge of his bed, facing the wall, his back slouched. He was playing with a glass of alcohol in his right hand, juggling the ice inside, making the only sound in the room. His brows were furrowed and though that was normal for him, they told of something else other than sheer irritation. He didn't bother turning on the lights when he returned to his room after the argument because he thought he would be able to sleep easily. But he was wrong, and now it was just a few minutes before dawn breaks.
He had many regrets in the past, that he knew of, but making that deal with the witch and the vampires was definitely not one of those. Not now. Not ever. He chose to do it, despite the fact that he knew things would turn out like this. He chose to do it even though Fai might hate him for it.
But what was so wrong in giving someone a chance to start again, to start living his own life? It was something he did not only to make the damn mage live, but for him to also realize that he was worthy of a sacrifice, contrary to what he believed in.
Why was it so hard for the mage to accept the decision he so willingly chose?
The drizzle from some hours ago had now become a downpour. Seeing that his windows were slightly open, he stood up and turned to close it. But there, reflected in the glass was Fai, dripping wet and standing at the door of his room.
"Did you never learn how to knock?" he asked sarcastically, still looking at the mage through the reflection.
No response.
"Where have you been?" Kurogane asked with concern, seeing how dripping Fai was.
"Thinking," came Fai's quiet voice. His voice was a little shaky, perhaps from being out in the rain, or from weakness from not drinking.
From the reflection on the window, Kurogane saw Fai looking at him through the glass too.
"That doesn't answer my question," the ninja grumbled.
"Kurogane…"
"What, you want me to apologize? Don't waste your time," he said impatiently.
Fai shook his head and at this, Kurogane turned around to face him. The other's eye was downcast, and Kurogane felt his anger ebb away.
Fai looked up at him.
"Sorry."
It took him a great courage to be able to look Kurogane in the eye, knowing simply that he wasn't even worthy of it. He had told them all lies, and manipulated them, and in his own way, used them. Yet this man was willing to do everything to make an unworthy rascal like him live. There were a lot of things he wanted to say, but somehow, this was all that came out. And it wasn't enough. It wasn't even close to explaining everything he wanted to say, but maybe, maybe 'sorry' was a start.
He suddenly found himself in Kurogane's embrace. It was tight, and protective, and warm. He felt Kurogane's lips touch his damp hair, and he closed his eyes and rested his head on the other's chest.
Kurogane didn't say it. But with the way he held Fai in his arms, Fai knew he was forgiven.