Disclaimer: I own nothing!
A/N: Thanks to Sina for the great beta, love you and big hugs. And always hugs and love you to my online sisters, Myra, Kacee, Kim, and Sassy, for always being there.
Summery: Their Angel is gone.
Goodbye Angel, Goodbye
The room was filled with flowers, flowers for life that wasn't anymore. Everyone from the lab and the police department filled the seats, and some even stood along the walls. Even the mayor was there to lend support. A room full of love, for this life cut to short. It was one o'clock, time for her serves to begin. The preacher gave a beautiful ceremony, one fit for an Angel.
Catherine was the first to speak that day. She squeezed Grissom's hand tight before she made her way to the front of the room. She looked at the photo they had placed next to the urn that contained her ashes. Turning back to the room she cleared her throat before she begun. "She was beautiful, and so sweet. Her life was cut too short. I take so much for granted, I think we all do. When I heard about her death, I didn't want to believe it. My heart broke." Catherine wiped her eyes. "It poured that night, the night we were told she was gone. Almost immediately the sky opened up. Heaven got their Angel back that night. I would give anything in this world I have just to have her back on Earth again." She made her way to her seat and held on to Ecklie.
Brass let go of Sofia's hand, and sadly made his way to where Catherine had just stood. He looked at his good friend, Grissom and his wife. He felt for them, he and Sofia had just found out they were expecting but he hadn't had the heart to tell anyone yet. He didn't want his friend to get even more upset, not that he would. He took a few deep breaths before he spoke.
"She was the sweetest little thing, wasn't she?" Brass tried to smile through his pain. "Every time I saw her, she made me smile. I'm just sorry we won't get to know better. I had so much love for her, and I always will."
After Brass spoke, Warrick went. He sang a beautiful song he wrote for her. A beautiful song for the beautiful person she was. It was all Warrick could do was get through the song, before a lump caught in his throat.
Once Warrick had put his guitar away, he returned to his seat and wrapped his arm around Tina. In each others arms they sobbed. They both wondered why the world was so cruel. Out all the horrible people that walked the world, an innocent one had to die.
After Warrick, Greg, then Nick took their turns telling cute stories of a life they came to say goodbye to. Neither one got very far. Both let their shells crumble, as they tried to talk about her, and how much she meant to them. They didn't understand how the world could be so cruel.
Grissom stood up and walked to the podium. His mouth was dry from how much he cried. He didn't know if he could speak but as he looked at the photo of her, he knew he would have to try, at least for her, for his Angel. "How can you sum someone's entire life up in just a few words, even when she was only with you for such a short time? What words should you use? Then some how let the world to know how much she affected your life. Is it even possible? I look out my window and think about what she should be doing now. It hurts deep in my soul. Every moment I want to scream to the heaves asking them why. Why they took my angel. She meant so much to me. I will never see her smile, or hear her laugh. I'll never see her eyes light up when she discovers something new." Grissom had to stop. His heart was breaking too much to continue. As he looked out into the crowed, he saw the whole room in tears.
Grissom walked over the picture, and stared at it. "Goodbye Angel, daddy and mommy love you so much." He softly kissed his fingers and placed them on the picture of his and Sara's daughter.
Nick put his arm around Sara and held her close. He hated to see her hurt the way she was, completely in shock, unable to speak, and fearful to cry. He kissed the side of her head.
Grissom knelt down in front of Sara. His hands covered hers. His thumbs tickled the back of her hands. "Honey, would you like say something?" Looking into her empty eyes, he felt helpless.
Sara opened and closed her mouth to speak but no sound came out. In her hands she clutched a blanket. Her whole body was numb. She knew Nick and Grissom were both touching her but she couldn't feel anything.
The serves ended and Grissom helped Sara up and they walked out together, Grissom's arms wrapped tightly around her.
Sara let Grissom glide her out of the room and into the limo. The whole time she clung tightly to the blanket close to her heart. She really hadn't let it go since realized her beautiful child slipped out of the world.
On the way back to their home, Sara rested her head against the window, and watched the world go by. Grissom hated to see her shut off. He wished she would yell, or cry. Sara, his Sara, who was always so emotional that she would cry for helpless victims of hence crimes, didn't shed a tear over this.
"Sara" He took her hand and gripped it hard. "Can you look at me?"
Sara reluctantly turned her head and looked at Grissom. Put every time her eyes met his she looked down instead.
"I wish you would talk to me. Let me know what's going on." Grissom tried to get her to open up but she just turned back away.
--
In their living room Grissom and Sara sat along with Ecklie, Catherine, Sofia, Brass, Greg, and Nick. They all made nothing more than small talk. Ecklie told them to take as much time off as needed.
Sara got up and walked up the stairs without a word to everyone. They all just watched her disappear to the second floor. They had all figured she went to lay down until they heard a crash. The crash sent them flying up the stairs. They found her in what was Angel's room, packing things up.
Grissom walked up behind her and tried to talk to her but she was in her own world and just kept packing things in boxes.
"Sara, you need to stop." Grissom turned her around and squeezed her wrist. He could see she was close to the breaking point and he didn't want to push. Everyone was telling not to push her, that she would cry when she was ready but he knew he had to. He thought that would be the only why. "Just stop this. Why are you doing this? Sara, please just talk to me." Tears slipped down his face.
Sara was trying to hide her growing emotions. "I…" She looked up and saw everyone at the doorway. "I…I'm sorry." Her lips started to quiver.
Grissom was speechless; he didn't understand what she had to be sorry for. She hadn't done anything wrong. "Honey, what are you sorry for?"
"It was my fault." Sara tried to hold the tear in.
"Nothing was your fault. Nobody is blaming you." Grissom moved his hands up and rested them on her shoulders.
"But it was…" Sara shoved his hands off her and backed up. "I'm her mother, I should've known." Tears started to fall from her eyes. "I should've known she was ill and should've…" She wiped her eyes and pushed pass Grissom.
Grissom pulled her into a tight hug. "It was and accident Sara, just and accident. It was nobody's fault, you hear me?"
"No, don't touch me." Sara moved out of Grissom's grip. "It was my fault." Her whole body was shaking. "She died while I slept in the next room. I didn't hear her and I should've known she stopped breathing. I didn't know and I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."
He pulled her back into a hug. As he held her, he felt her knees buckle and he softly lowered her to the ground.
Sara sobbed hard into Grissom's arms. All she could do was whisper between sobs. "Why Angel."
Grissom just held her tight and rocked her back and forth. He just caressed her hair and gave her kisses.
When Sara started to cry, they all walked back down stairs and left the two alone. It was a heartbreaking scene.
Down stairs Greg got on his cell phone and called Myra, his girlfriend, to tell her how much he loved her. He tired to keep it together for her; he didn't want her to get upset that she had to work that day.
Nick had made a phone call himself to Kacee, his girlfriend. Unlike Greg, Nick let his emotions out. He just cried into the phone and let Kacee's voice sooth him.
Brass held Sofia in his arms as they cried together, as did Tina and Warrick, and Catherine and Ecklie. Not one of the couples knew how to help their friends. They were all unsure if they should leave or stay there. They all thought about it decided it would be best to give them space to mourn together.
Catherine walked up the stairs and knocked on the open door to Sara and Grissom's bedroom. "Gil, Sara?"
Grissom turned to Catherine, and smiled. Sara had fallen asleep but still whimpered a bit. He bent down and walked out the bedroom door.
"Hey sorry about not being a good host today." Grissom apologized to Catherine.
"No need to apologize, Gil. You two need time together. We all are going to head off but just call if you need something." Catherine turned to walk away and then turned back. "We'll let ourselves out. You go back to Sara." She walked away.
Grissom walked back into the bedroom and climbed into bed next to Sara, wrapping his arms around her. That's how he stayed the rest of the day, holding Sara.
The End