Dedicated to Love the Brightest Star, for being an absolute angel. Love ya!
"They sit around a fire, and thinks of the things that might have been. Mrs. Flowers observes, as she always does."
I tried my best to stay true to the characters, but I couldn't resist a bit of Matt/Meredith. Hope you enjoy!
Transience: the state or fact of lasting only for a short time
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Maybe it doesn't have to be this way, or maybe it always was. Mrs. Flowers looks around. Elena, leaning on Stefan's arm. Matt and Bonnie, laughing their heads off at each other, the sound oddly merry in the otherwise dreary boarding house. Meredith, lost in thought, with a hint of a smile on her face. Damon, a little apart from them all, as always. He tries too hard sometimes, she thinks. But then, they all do.
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Stefan wonders sometimes, of the point of it all. All the years of walking the earth, awake, had taught him nothing, and sometimes he wonders of what is beyond. Often, tired of the officious futility of the world, he had been tempted, to just let go. To take off that useless piece of metal on his finger that bound him to the Earth, but not anymore. Maybe this was why he had waited for so long, he thinks, running a careless finger through her gold tresses. It's the same shade as Katherine's, but that just doesn't matter anymore. Because theirs was a love written in the stars, and he'd waited all eternity for her, and there was no other way than for them to be together, no matter what it cost, how much it hurt.
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Meredith smiles. Sometimes it's so easy to forget who they were, what they'd been through. Sometimes it was so easy to pretend they were just a bunch of teenagers lounging around and having fun, nothing more, nothing less. But maybe she was tired enough of pretending, or maybe she'd done it for too long, she was just used to it, really. But she sees Elena's smile as she snuggles into Stefan to get warm as the fire burns out, and she knows it's real. And she remembers the silly oath they had made years ago, swearing to do everything in their power to help Elena secure Stefan as hers, and she realizes how far they have come. Maybe she'd made some mistakes, maybe she's trusted some people a bit too far. But even though she hates feeling so out of control, there was nothing she could have done. She'd realized Alaric had been hiding things from her, but she was someone who had lied to her friends all her life, so she'd forgiven that. Maybe she shouldn't have, but that was neither here nor there, and it didn't matter anymore. They were all together now, they were happy. There was no saying how long it would last, but for once in her life she decided to seize the moment. It was cozy and warm, and Matt's eyes shined, and she suddenly noticed the shape of his shoulders, and thought there was a very appealing curve to his lips. Maybe she shouldn't think of Matt like that, but she was tired of being the person she pretended to be all the time, and Matt's laugh was catching, it made you want to laugh along as well, and she let go.
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Damon catches her eye, even as she leans further into Stefan, and he smirks. She smiles back, and in that one moment, magic happens, an ages old magic, as ancient as the world itself. That was how they always were, Damon and her, on two ends of a pole, like the earth and the moon on a orbit, inseparable, yet never really together, and she realizes the truth of her own words once again, that love can have many faces, many forms, and she could love them both. She could love them all, she thinks fondly as she looks around the room, and Matt suddenly makes a weird snort, and Bonnie's laugh tinkles in her ear, and all is alright with the world.
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Bonnie was happy. It was all she'd ever wanted to be. Through all the years, she'd learnt things, she'd grown, but that was something that had never changed. If you had asked that little Bonnie what she wanted in life, she'd have said it was for her, Meredith and Elena to be safe and happy, and today, all these years later, she'd still say the same thing. Happiness, is that too much to ask for? Maybe it was, maybe it wasn't. Maybe it was all worth the while. But right now she was happy, and that is all she will ever learn to really care for.
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Stefan looks at his brother, and he looks beneath that signature smirk on his face. Sometimes, he thinks he is the only one who really understands Damon, and he knows that beneath that facade of a dark, dangerous immortal, he is just as vulnerable as everyone else, that beneath his relentless pursuit of adventure, his ever unsatisfied desire for power, he wishes for a nest, a home to come back to. He knows because he remembers. He remembers all the times Damon would provoke their drunk father, to get his attention away from Stefan. He remembers the look on his face when he used to talk about their mother, though that became rare as they grew up, and they just didn't talk anymore. But he knew why Damon followed him to Fell's Church, because Katherine never put the idea in his head, and he knew why Damon had saved Bonnie when she was attacked by the trees, even though he put it down to a whim. He knows all the things he'd wanted to say that day. He knows why Damon hates Matt so much, because somewhere deep down, he just wishes he could be like him. And he also knows that, deep, deep down, his brother loves him, he always had, and that will never change.
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Damon took another swig of Black Magic, but the drink didn't seem to do its job these days at all, and he wished he could just stop pretending for once, that he didn't care. Because he cared, a lot, and maybe that was the problem. Maybe he just needed a home to come back to, or maybe he was already there, who knows. He looks at Elena, and she seems to glow in the light of the fire, and she looks like an ethereal being from a different world. Or maybe it was the light of love. But this was not the Elena he wanted, this was not the Elena he pursued. His Elena was a temptress, always so close, but somehow still out of his reach. Someone who kept him on his toes, who was strong enough to challenge him, to give him something to fight for. That was the Elena he loved. And together, they could do great things, they could rule the world, they could reign over light and darkness alike. But looking at her right now, he doesn't know if she'd want that, if she'd be happy as his Princess of Darkness, because this is the happiest he'd ever seen her. And maybe he'd always choose his brother over him, but he'd still love her, and nothing can ever, ever change that, and he remembers a little bird and her song, and as Elena always says, love is a manifold thing, and that just makes everything right.
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She looks at Damon, there is something about the way his hair falls into his face that makes a strange warmth sear through her chest. That was something that hadn't changed either, maybe it never will. But she has learnt to let go, and after all these years, in that one moment, it was all the same. Maybe she'd always been a second choice, someone to pass the while with when Elena was away. Maybe she was more, or maybe it wasn't about more or less in the first place. But she has learnt to let it not matter. And she remembers all those secret kisses, all the times he'd held her and how it had made her feel. She remembers the times they had been just Damon and Bonnie, all pretenses dropped, just another broken boy and clueless girl. And she remembers those stars in the infinite depth of his black eyes that only she seemed to see, and Love is only a four letter word. She remembers all the diaries they tried to keep, and reflects, once again, on the futility of words, how they seemed to be a cage where you had to limit your emotions.
Maybe it will always be this way. But Bonnie was happy, and so was everyone else. She bites into one of the cookies that Mrs. Flowers had baked for them, and wonders if it was meant to be, everything they had gone through, all the sacrifices they had made, was for this one moment, one evening of happiness. Or maybe there was more to come, a lot more to look forward to. She will look ahead of her when its time, she will have to. But she sees the magic in the moment, she sees Matt smile at Meredith, and she knows Matt, and she knows that smile, and she knows that something is coming up.
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Matt doesn't know if it's right, he doesn't know what he is fighting for, what is worth fighting for in the first place. He doesn't know what they'd ever done to deserve going through everything that they did. Sometimes, he wonders how it would have been if Stefan had never turned up in Fell's Church. He would still be with Elena, perhaps, Bonnie would never have found out that she was a witch, Meredith would have lived with her secrets all her life, and Caroline would be alive. Maybe he would have taken that football scholarship and he would have been way out here, living in a big city by this time. Maybe they'd have lived a 'normal' life, never really knowing themselves. He sits and thinks of what might have been, but he doesn't long for it, because Stefan is the best friend anyone could ever ask for, and Elena is happy, and that is one reason he doesn't regret anything of what has happened. Yes, he had loved Elena, he had loved her with everything he had, but sometimes things don't work out no matter how much you want them to, and you just have to let go. But he'd never give up on love, no matter what, he would go all over the world in search of it, even if it was to come back and find out that love had been waiting right here at home all along. Because Matt never gives up. On anything.
Because by now Matt knows, that in the endless battle between good and evil, good doesn't always win. But as Stefan had once said, that was no reason they should give up, that was no reason they should lose hope.
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Damon looks over at Matt and Bonnie huddled together by the fire, lost in their own world as they sometimes seemed to be, even as they tried to make everyone else laugh, and he waits for the jealousy to come, but it doesn't. He just wishes he was Matt for a while, to be closer to his redbird, but it's only a vague longing. He wonders for a moment why he'd always thought of her as his, but somehow, it seemed right. He'd gone to hell and back for her, and though he'd never admit it to anyone else, he'd do it all over again if he had to, just to keep her safe. And suddenly she grins at him from across the room, and her eyes are so bright and she reminds him of a little bird more than ever, and he chuckles to himself, and he wishes he could sweep her off her feet and fly her away to their nest where they belonged, and the century old pain of wanting something he knew he didn't deserve is suddenly gone.
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For Matt, the world is easily black and white, he misses the shades of grey. He forgets, sometimes, that good and evil are relative terms, after all. Maybe that was why it was so hard for him to understand Damon, but he had been sorting out black hairs from white handkerchiefs for as long for as long as he can remember, and he never made a mistake. Maybe there were shades in him as well, maybe there was still hope for them all. Hope. Maybe that was all they had in the long run, to hold on to. And suddenly Matt leans back, and Meredith puts her hand over his, he feels like he can always depend on her, and, quite childishly, he thinks that no matter what happens, Meredith can always put everything right, and he finds hope in the feel of her fingers on his skin.
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Bonnie looks into the fire, and tries to remember what it stands for. Bravery, pride, life. She was not brave, she had nothing to be proud of, and somehow she'd never been able to let go of her fascination with death, the idea of being young in her grave. She couldn't imagine why people associated fire with her, but she remembers the real purpose of the fire, how it drives the darkness away, keeps the people around it warm, ever since it had been first created. She thinks of how it keeps everyone around it warm, but always burns itself out in the end. And maybe her Celtic ancestors had sat around a fire on a evening like this all those years ago, just like they did then, and suddenly it all made sense.
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But I'll always choose Stefan, she thinks, burying her face in the nook of his arm and inhaling the woody, husky smell that was always him, not caring that the others were there. And he pulls her closer in. She knows somewhere that Damon would choose Bonnie too, perhaps. She has seen how Damon looks at her, and it is a different Damon, the real one, the one she could only touch, but never fathom. But she knows that Damon loves her too, and nothing can ever change that. Love has many faces, and it has wings, and Stefan whispers something in her ear, and all that matters is his breath on her ear, and his arm around her shoulders, and she closes her eyes, and she doesn't want to think any more.
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Mrs. Flowers looks around once again, and smiles to herself. They were kids, after all, yes, even Stefan and Damon, because they had their lives taken away before they even had a chance to grow up. And in that moment, she doesn't see vampires or witches or people who've come back from the dead, she just sees six teenagers and an old lady, and for a split second, she wishes there never was anything more to it. But even with all the magic in the world, some things could never be changed, and she wouldn't change anything about this evening even if she could.