{Chapter I}
Four months after Jennifer Salk had died, I could no longer take it. Her ghost still wandered around my inventions, and every once in awhile, I would be able to speak to her. It seemed really, to drive me insane. How close I was to her-and yet so far, when every time she'd leave without any explanation, and return as if she needed none. I knew the others saw this troubling aspect in me, maybe it wasn't just because I loved her-maybe it was because she was the first person in a long while who could not only discuss something with me, but to do it in interest, and generate new thoughts upon a subject I thought I had nothing else to think of.
At first, upon realizing how much I missed her, I tried to ignore her ghost, and her voice. Sometimes, it worked. She would not visit for a few days-a few weeks, but when she did reappear, I could only apologize for ignoring her. She seemed to take no note of it, or even see a reason why I should apologize. I had even tried to show the others the chess game which i had created. I was able to beat them all at it, even with the added challenge of the computer. Often, the computer would notice that whoever I was against, was disinterested, and the game no longer was 'how can I beat the player before the computer catches on', but 'how can I beat the computer, and then the player?' I would make up one strategy, only to have the computer break it, and I have to think of a new one. It didn't help, though. The others noticed this decline in my ability. I began to come out of my cell less and less, and when I did come out, and it was usually with some useless yet highly advanced invention. One may be able to have stated that I-at one point-was in love with Susan. Yet how can they state this now? I only wished to be able to speak with Jennifer again, and when her ghost visited, I often tried to mask this. She knew however, my feelings, yet could do nothing to help them.
I could take it no longer, one day. And when her ghost appeared, I decided to tell her.
"It
is unbearable to be here, and you visiting me-when I know you are
dead in your grave."
"Unbearable, doctor?" She asked me.
"how?"
"Don't toy with me." I pleaded, "I just wish you
weren't dead. You don't know how much being without you has driven me
insane."
She was silent, but I knew she was listening.
"So,
I can't stand it anymore. Whether it is love that drives me this way,
or simply because I cannot stand to be around my friends who do not
stand up to your intelligence."
"You insult your friends, so
that you may tell me you love me?"
"You already knew it, my
dear."
"Yes-I knew, I knew you loved me. I've known it long, but that means just about the same thing as it meant when you proposed to me. When I was alive."
I
didn't reply to this, but I continued. "I know there is no way I
will ever be able to see you alive. Not now, not again, not ever. But
I cannot stand to live here, without you."
She only shook her
head.
"I
know it hurts you to see me acting like this. Its none of your doing,
I know. If it were, if it were you would not be dead, you would still
be alive. You don't even know the feeling which I feel."
"Please."
She asked me, "don't fall apart before me. Would you have acted the
same, if the Alien stayed as General Allen? If we did get married,
would you still have broken down in this way? I have hurt you by
becoming what I am, and then I have egged you on by reappearing
before you, again and again."
"I do not know how I would have
acted, Jennifer. Whether it would have been the same, or different.
But I know I would have been happy, for you my dear. Now-how can I be
happy for you? You died a death you should not have died."
She
looked away from me. "If all you are going to do, is have your
heart break before my very eyes, I will leave you to do so, so that
you still keep your dignity. If you wish to discuss some sort of
reason, or some way I can help you, then I will stay."
I knew I was crying for no reason to her. She knew how much I was hurt, but she had no way of helping me. She had no way of knowing how I felt, no way of assuming, or emphasizing. She had not felt the emotion in such a long time, it was like it had died in her. Still, the feeling of her going only wanted me to call her back.
"Then I ask you, what do you think I should do?"
"If
you believe that there is no other way to solve your pain, then hang
yourself. I do not think you should, and I really do not think that
is the way to go about it. It will hurt all who remain alive, and it
is useless to die over one person-and harm many others. If you really
think you need to have me back, what if you try to.." She trailed
off, and I saw her soul less eyes look down, as if they had some
heart felt feeling in them. But then she continued. "If you really
think that you cannot go on living without me, then you could try to
clone me."
"Clone? My dear, thats pure science fiction."
"Is
it, now?" She asked. "So is everything else that happens here. It
will be almost impossible to clone me with what we've been able to
accomplish in recent years. But, I think, it may be possible to at
least..clone my body."
I had
not thought of attempting such a feat. "How would I do that, my
dear?" I asked. "I mean-I never thought about trying to do
that."
"You'd need to build something to preserve the body in,
and little by little, extract bits of DNA from it, using a computer,
and placing it-cell by cell until you get me."
"But-your mind,
my dear, it won't be the same having a mind less mass walking around
in place of you."
She sighed, "if you can create the body, I
will see about the mind."
I nodded, "So, how should we go
about making this?"
"You should build a chamber, a little
taller then myself, and connect it to your computer." She nodded to
one of the old inventions I had created to try and get Susan back to
her normal size. I nodded, as I began to make a mental blue print in
my mind.
"And liquids-well, I'm sure if you ask nicely, General
Monger will give you something to preserve the body in. And you'll
need wires, so that you can transport each DNA part onto and into the
body as quickly and as safely as possible. You'll need to test my DNA
to its once your done, before we can even try to figure out how to
give it a mind."
"But it won't be the same, will it, my
dear?"
"Doctor." She said gently, "As long as I remain
dead, nothing you do will feel the same to you in your heart. We can
only hope for the best."
"If it works, my dear, you must
promise not to leave me."
She seemed surprise, as if the request
was almost not something I should have requested, being so odd, but
worked fine all the same. "I will do as much as I can, Doctor."
I
seem comforted by this, but there still seemed to be tension with me
being around her. I knew very well that she was dead; it made no
difference now what I did or said to her. She still had the emotions
she had left with, and I was glad, really to still be able to see the
one person who kept me sane.
"You must not forget to tell the
others."
"Can't you tell them?"
"I only am here for
you, Doctor. It is only by your wish to see me so badly that I
appear. They all mourn my death, but only you wish to still see me
around."
"I doubt that, my dear."
"I know where I
appear, and to whom I appear to. I have only seen you, since I have
died. Not Missing Link, not BOB, not Susan, nor Insecto. If they
wished to see me, they have not wished it enough for me to
appear."
"So, you say you are just a figment of my mind? That
you are not there? That I have been falling apart, my heart
breaking-to a figment of my imagination?"
"No." She stated,
clearly. "I am not a figment of your mind, but only to you I shall
appear. You are the only one who wishes to see me, and I must bid you
goodnight."
"Wait." I snapped, and she turned around to face me. I hugged her-or attempted to, and then kissed her-the same spot which the late General Allen had done. Between the nose and the eyes, on the snout. It was a cold, shivering feeling, and I pulled away quickly. The feeling was an unshakable cold, as if she had permanently frozen me. She looked at me, and then asked.
"Do
you wish to do anything else to me, doctor?"
She did not sound
insulted, but I didn't really know what emotion she was expressing by
saying that. I shook my head no, and she was gone in an instant. It
was an odd feeling to hug her. She was not warm-but an ice cold, my
hands and body nearly past through her when I hugged her, and the
kiss-I can say nothing about it. It was about as hollow and cold as
could be. I knew well it had no effect on her, but on me, it effected
me greatly. I turned around to look at the items I had in my room,
the box of junk. I will begin to work on the beginnings of the
cloning machine, which will-I hope-bring back Dr. Rattus.
