Hello! ^^

Okay so this randomly came to my mind when I started pissing off my parents and friends with "I'm on a boat". Seriously awesome song. Anywhosers enjoy!

Jim just could stop singing.

"Take a picture, trick, I'm on a boat, bitch!" Wandering through the hallways, he was driving everybody crazy!

Jim walked past sickbay. "Fifth of Vodka! Shit on Debra's desk! Buy a gun, in my mouth..."

"Jim!" Bones walked out. "Don't you dare think about that! Ever! You can't kill yourself!"

"Bones, calm down..."

"No, I won't calm down! If theres nothing for you to live for then how about this?!" And then Bones kissed him square on the mouth. "Live for us okay?" And with that he went back into sickbay, leaving a very confused Jim in his wake.

Jim shrugged and moved on.

He walked along the crews quarters. "You can't stop me motherfucker, cause I'm on a boat!" Uhura had just walked around the corner.

"Jim!" She screeched. She slapped him across the face. "That is so rude! And to think I was coming to see you after McCoy was all worked about you!"

"He was-what?"

"He said you were gonna commit suicide! He was practically in tears! But you're still just a jerk!" And she took off running around the corner.

Jim shrugged, and again, moved on.

He walked along the deck to the mess hall. "Jump out the window! Suck a dudes dick!" He sung, pointing in a random direction.

Unfortunately, He had just pointed at Sulu, walking in the opposite direction. "How dare you Captain! I will not cheat on Chekov! Never!" And he ran away from Jim in tears.

"Just what the fuck is going on here!" He shouted.

Nevertheless, he sighed and moved on.

Walking along the desk towards the turbo lift, going up to the bridge to check on things, he ran across Chekov.

"Turn into a jet! Bomb the Russians!"

"What?!" Chekov exclaimed. "B-b-b-b-but why, Keptin? Did I make you angry? What did I do wrong?" What he had said finally sunk in.

" Oh ,shit. No Chekov you didn't do anything wrong, I just-"

"You just hate me! Thats why! I've always seen you eyeing Sulu, and it bugs you that we're together! Well, fuck you!" And he ran away.

"Shit."

He would've run after him, but he had a job to do. So he moved on.

On the bridge, Kirk sung under his breath.

"Arms spread wide on the starboard bow, Gonna fly this boat up to the moon somehow...."

"That is illogical, Captain. Seeing as how we are not on a boat."

"Its just-"

"Captain, I must inform you that many of the crew are complaining of your violent and rude outbursts."

"Spock, I was just singing."

"Indeed. It may be logical for you to stop soon."

Jim pondered for a moment. "Yes, it would be."

Jim spent the rest of the day finding Uhura, Sulu, and Chekov (who had all been consoling each other in one of the crew rooms) and apoligizing.

Finally Jim came to sickbay. He took a deep breath and walked through the door. He took a look around sickbay, his eyes finally landing on Bones' office.

He walked slowly towards it, expecting the worst. Bones was sitting in his chair looking at a padd. "Like a Boss, huh?"

"Wha-Oh. Yeah. Thats what it was. How did you know?"

"I looked it up after you left. Figured you probably weren't one for suicide."

"Does that mean you take it back?" Bone stood up and strided across the room. Once his face was within 3 inches of Jim's, he stopped.

"You mean that?"

"Yeah." Jim breathed.

"Hell no." bones said before he crashed his lips upon Jim's.