TALES OF ADULTHOOD

A/N: Hello, I am still alive! School and depression that comes and goes has prevented me from doing much writing. But alas, I am back with something fresh and new. Not long after I got into South Park (sometime 2010/2011) I wrote and drew up the futures of the main five boys. After perusing the information I wrote up and had not seen in years, I felt it would be fun to introduce readers to their futures. I will eventually introduce all the characters in due time. This story will be similar to Tales of Toddlerhood in which I will write snippets of the lives of Stan, Kyle, Cartman, Kenny, and Butters, but as adults. I will also be accepting ideas from readers so please tell me if you have something you'd like to see. In the meantime, enjoy!

LIFE AS WE KNOW IT

What a perfect spring day. The sky was blue with sparse clouds now and again and the trees swayed to the tune of a slight breeze. At this moment a Boulder County Animal Control vehicle was parked in a 7-11 parking lot, the occupant typing on a computer and sipping on a Slurpee at the same time. 34 year old Stan Marsh was currently trying to finish his paperwork in his car before his shift ended, eager to get home and not have to worry about work for the next three days for spring break at his kids' school would begin and it meant a family trip to the lake. Suddenly he received a call via his computer from headquarters.

"Marsh, you still working the Henderson case?" the woman asked.

"No, I'm finishing up the report now."

"Good, because Morris needs backup on a case about a dog that's been found chained to a fence."

"Oh god, what happened now?" Stan groaned.

"Apparently the owner of the dog is creating a scene. I'm sending you the address now."

Stan waited a few seconds before an address appeared on his laptop. The great thing about the future was how instant information could be exchanged, including radios that could be worn as a watch which made being an animal control officer easier than ever. Stan was hoping to be able to go home early but today was not that day. He shut his laptop and fired up his car and drove down the street to meet fellow officer Henry Morris. It was well after six o' clock by the time he came home. He sighed as he opened the front door and no sooner did he shut it was he attacked at the leg by a pair of arms.

"Daddy! Daddy home!"

"Dylan let go of your father and go back to the dinner table," scolded his mother as she met up with Stan. The three-year-old relented and ran back to the table. Kara wrapped her arms around her husband as he took off his uniformed shirt. "Long day I take it?"

Stan sighed again. "Very. It was relatively calm all day until I got a call about a chained up dog Morris was helping out. Apparently the owner of the dog appeared just as Morris was going to rescue him and he got real argumentative and combative. Then his teenage son comes out yelling and causing a scene. The police had to detain the man and we were able to get the dog to the animal hospital after."

"Oh my, how was the dog?" Kara asked, arm still around Stan's neck.

"Pretty malnourished. The chain around his neck was nasty and his neck looked infected. I'll see how he's holding up later."

"Mmm, well in the meantime, dinner started not long ago, come join the family."

Stan smiled as he walked into the dining room where his three children sat, all waiting for their father's arrival. Stan took a seat across his nine-year-old daughter.

"Mmm, this looks great. I hope you weren't waiting for me to start," Stan licked his lips as he cracked open the beer his wife passed him.

"Naw, we already started," his daughter, Ayda, waved a hand. "But now that you're home, let me tell you what happened at school today!"

"Daddy, I seen a big bug today! It was dis big," Dylan hopped in his seat, holding his hands out.

"Dylan, sit, and don't overwhelm your father, he just got home," Kara scolded.

"It's fine hon," Stan passed off and began to cut into his chicken. "So what happened in school today, Bry?" he looked to his five-year-old who was sitting quietly in his seat.

"Hey!" Ayda and Dylan cried.

Stan ignored this and looked at his first son. The boy was much milder than his other two and because of this often got overlooked.

Bryan smiled. "Oh, you know, the us'al. We painted a garden. I put all the doggies and kitties in it."

"All of them? Did they all fit?" The Marsh house was often called a zoo, what with the four cats, three dogs, one Guinea pig, and fish tank it held. Thankfully his wife loved animals just as much as he did and now that he was an adult, he could fill the walls of his home with them. Of course their children learned to love animals quickly as well and Ayda was able to get that guinea pig she had wanted for her ninth birthday.

"Oh yeah, and Miss Parker really liked it."

"Daddy, Gamma and me go to the park and I seen this bike. Can I have a new bike?" Dylan interrupted.

"Dad, can I tell you what happened in school now?" Ayda asked, somewhat impatient.

"Kids, eat your dinner, you have all night still to tell Daddy about your day," Kara instructed. "C'mon, Dylan sit down. Look, there's corn on the cob, you love that. Eat dinner or there's no dessert."

Dylan gasped and began eating his supper again. Almost every night was the same scene, getting their youngest to sit down long enough to finish a meal. He wasn't a bad kid; he just didn't like to stay still for too long. Any moment that he could run or jump was a bonus in his eye. Kara often would ask her husband if their son should be tested for ADHD but Stan was against this. Dylan was still young and until he started school, he didn't feel they should worry.

"The other two weren't like that at his age," Kara would always argue.

"There's nothing to worry about, besides, I think our doctor is getting annoyed at us about that," Stan would always say. That would usually end the arguments. Any time Stan brought up the family doctor there was little left to discuss. Stan had to go by their doctor's word, for not only was the man responsible for every member's health, he was also Stan's very best friend. Kyle Broflovski ran a successful family practice in Boulder and as luck would have it, both the Marsh and Broflovski families were the best of friends. Stan and Kyle's wives were friends and all their kids played with each other every week. Kyle lived with his wife and three kids in Boulder and they were part of the reason Stan was looking forward to the start of Spring Break. Their kids went to different schools but were in the same district so they had Spring Break the same week. Both families decided they were going to spend three days in Denver doing various activities and everyone involved were very excited about it.

The remainder of the night was spent with a family trip to the nearby park where Stan and Kara walked their dogs and the kids burned off energy at the playground before the kids got ready for bedtime. As tired as he was Stan usually helped out his wife during baths and 'quiet time'. He remembered from his own childhood that his father didn't participate much in this and he couldn't understand why. Bath and bed time was a great way to get the kids talking about their day. Maybe it was just easier to get two kids bathed and in bed, not three. His wife usually bathed their sons and observed hair and tooth brushing. However story time was always Stan's thing. His own mother read to him every night past age ten and he vowed he would do the same to his own kids someday.

Currently Kara was rounding up some last-minutes items for tomorrow's trip upstairs so Stan corralled the kids together for story-time on the couch in the loft. With having one daughter who was four years older than her two brothers it meant at least two different stories being read each night. Thankfully Ayda was a much better sister to her brothers than Shelley ever was to him and didn't mind preschool and toddler books. In fact she would often help Bryan and Dylan in choosing books for their dad to read.

"Ayda, stop spinning your brother around! Bryan put away the Legos, playtime is over. C'mon, have you three picked out your stories yet?" Stan instructed as he took a seat. His children took up seats next to him and brandished four books to his face. "C'mon, we're only doing two tonight, Mommy and I still have some packing to do. Okay, let's have one sissy book and one brother book. Okay, calm down so I can start."

A half hour later Kara put all three kids to bed. Meanwhile, Stan took it upon himself to collapse on his bed where one of his cats, Zak, laid on top his chest. Kara arrived soon enough and sat next to him.

"Long day?" she asked, amused.

Stan groaned. "Never mind me, how 'bout you?"

"Thankfully manageable. A lot of consulting for people today, allergy season is upon us so a lot of people have questions." Kara worked as a pharmacist at a drug store.

"I hope there was a good report from your mother on the kids."

Kara stroked her husband's arm. "They were great from what she told me. Thankfully she only had the two oldest for a short while after school so I could get off early and do some packing. Which reminds me… have you got everything you need? I still have to pack my make-up and such."

Stan rolled his eyes. "Probably. You made sure the first-aid kit is stocked right? As well as gathered all the meds?"

"First thing I did when I got home today. I couldn't find Bryan's inhaler, I'm pissed. I know we just started him on a new one now it's gone missing. I found another in our room so we should be good."

Stan rolled his eyes again as he stood up. "That's what happens when you have three asthmatics in this house. Inhalers go missing, used as toys, are playthings to the pets…" Ayda and Bryan had been diagnosed with asthma early on in life. Stan still suffered from it although it had gotten better over the years. While Ayda was old enough and responsible for her illness, Bryan still had yet to grasp the concept that the colorful canisters, tubing, and masks were a lifeline for three people in the house.

Stan and Kara went about their bedroom to pack last-minute items, checking off a list as they did so. Confident that they did everything they possibly could to prepare for the weekend, both exhausted parents fell into bed and soon, asleep.

8 AM. The alarm buzzed and a man groaned, switched it off, and rolled to his other side to sleep some more. Ten minutes passed and he was being shaken awake by his wife.

"Kyle, c'mon, we have to get up and ready."

Kyle groaned. "Meg, that was barely five minutes."

"It was ten, plenty of time. C'mon, I'm going to get the coffee on then get the kids up." As soon as she said that there was a knock at the bedroom door. Meghan opened it and an eight-year-old girl with blond hair poked her head in, as well as that of her younger sister's.

"Are we going soon?" Jocelyn asked.

Five-year-old Sierra rushed to her father and shook him. "C'mon Daddy! We hafta go! What if the Marshes are there first?"

Kyle doubted this; he knew his best friend liked to sleep in as long as possible too. However Kyle was used to waking early, he had spent years in medical school and briefly worked as an ER doctor before getting his own practice. His wife claimed to be an early riser since she was young too. This didn't mean that Kyle didn't try to catch some extra shut-eye when he could. His younger daughter, Sierra, made sure of that. Kyle shooed his daughters out so he could get dressed before going downstairs. He ate his breakfast as he scrolled on his tablet that morning's news.

"Now everyone has their bags all packed and they are all by the garage door, right?" Meghan asked their kids.

"Mommy, what if no one wants to play wif me?" four-year-old Ethan asked.

"What? Bryan loves playing with you," Meghan said, distracted as she placed dishes in the dishwasher.

"Meg, why are you doing that? Sarah will be by tomorrow," Kyle said, speaking of their nanny.

"Bryan doesn't like me," Ethan continued, arms crossed. "He said rocks were stupid. He pushed me last time!"

Kyle sighed; his son reminded him of himself for he had an aptitude for science at his young age which no one else shared. Stan's daughter was best friends with his oldest, and even though they were two years apart, Kyle's second daughter was great friends with Stan's youngest son since they were both so similar. This left Bryan and Ethan the odd ones out much of the time. While they did have fun, they often clashed.

Kyle looked down at his son. "Ethan, sometimes friends do things the other doesn't like playing. You know Uncle Stan and I were your age when we first met, right? He would rather play outside than watch a movie about space with me. We fought but do you think that made a difference?"

Ethan frowned in thought. "Uhh… yes?"

Kyle laughed. "We're still best friends and he lives ten minutes away from us. Maybe you do something Bryan likes, and then he'll want to do something you like. Try that today, okay?"

Ethan smiled and nodded. By 9 o'clock, the family was putting on their shoes, ready to jump in the van and drive to their destination. Kyle phoned Stan to let him know they were almost out the door.

"Dude, you're still not ready? Well if he wants to bring it just bring it! Dude, we're walking out right now."

"Is that Uncle Stan?" Sierra asked. "Ask him if Dylan's bringing his red ball!"

"I'm sure he is," Kyle frowned at her. "Well we'll see you when we see you then. We're still meeting up for lunch though after we get to the hotel so just catch me up if anything happens. Bye."

Kyle and Meghan got their kids into the van without fuss and began their hour-long trip into Denver where they would meet up with the Marsh family and spend Spring Break.

The first two chapters will be a two-part story. This one is the beginning of the introductions of the lives of the boys. Who is your favorite kid so far? Remember, I will be accepting ideas of the boys as adults if you have any. Please review, and have a good day.

Love and magic: Rose, February 27, 2017