If You Could See Me Now

Chapter 1: Forest

Edward is a 107 year old vampire, dating an 18 year old human. Edward is about to change their futures forever, can he see it through?

___________________________________________________________________________

Disclaimer: Are You Stephenie Meyer? No, You're Rosie. Are You Stephenie Meyer? No, You're Sammy. We Aren't S.M, Get It? :D

___________________________________________________________________________

Edward POV

The bell signalled the end of the day. My dead heart felt like it was at the end of a transformation between a human and a vampire. My head was playing tricks again but my dead heart felt as if it was beating.

"Edward?" My angel asked. No, she's not my angel anymore!

"Yes, my love?" No! She's not my love anymore!

"Are you alright?" She asked.

"Erm...yeah, I'm fine Bella. Come on, let's go." I said, opening my silver Volvo door. I waited for her to get strapped in before I closed the door. I walked to my side as fast as a human would. I started the engine and pulled out of the car park.

We arrived at Bella's in a matter of minutes. I went around to her side and helped her out of the car, not that she needed it. I grabbed her book bag from her and waited for her to get out.

"Come for a walk with me?" I asked her. I was about to do what I had never wanted to do. Something I promised I wouldn't do in her eyes, something I have to do to help her.

"Erm…sure." She replied, looking at me puzzled.

I held her bag for her as we walked together into the forest. I stopped before she could go any further. I looked down into her big, chocolate eyes. I could see me reflection shining off her. I looked in pain, my topaz eyes darkening slightly. I took in a deep breath of air before beginning my speech.

"Bella, I'm sorry but I need to do this." I started.

"Do what Edward? What do you need to do?" Bella asked, her voice going up an octave.

"Leave." I said. I owed her much more than this for an explanation but she didn't need to know anymore details than I'd tell her. I'd give anything for me to be able to read Bella's mind at this moment.

"Leave? So soon? Do we have to leave now? Can't we finish school?" She began, her eyes pleading.

"Bella, you will finish school. It's me who won't. You won't leave now with me. I'm going with my family. You're not on the list to come Bella." I stated, my dead heart breaking then breaking again as she took in this information. After a minute of two, she began to understand.

"You're leaving, alone? What about Alice, Emmett, Jasper, Rose, Carlisle, Esme?" She said, firing the names of my family, each name twisting my heart a bit more. I was stupid to let them get involved with my mess. They had to leave on my account. Carlisle had said that he couldn't pass for thirty much longer and that we'd have to start again soon anyway.

"They're gone, aren't they? They left without a goodbye. Alice. She left me without a goodbye. My best friend left me without a goodbye. Edward, you're leaving too. Why?" She continued, tears streaming down her face. I wanted to reach out and stop them, to cuddle her and tell her that what I'm saying next isn't true, that I'm lying, like I am. But I couldn't.

"Yes, Bella. They're gone. They left without a goodbye. They left last week after the" wince "Incident. Bella, yes, I am leaving too. But I've come to say goodbye, I owe you that much."

"Bella, where we're going is no place for you. It's for my family and me, not you. Don't look for us either. Alice is in pieces already, but if she saw you looking for us, she'd break." I continued. Bella looked in pain, as if she was dying. I could tell she was, dying inside.

"Edward, please don't." She whispered, only for me to hear.

"Bella, I have to. I can't pretend to be a human, because I'm not. It's causing too much pressure on my family. We're going somewhere where we don't have to pretend. We're going to be who we are, not someone else. I won't be able to save you anymore Bella, because I'm leaving and you won't need protecting from my kind anymore." My heart was in tiny scraps, lying ripped into pieces. I'm not sure how Bella was still breathing because this is worse for her. She won't have any friends she can rely on to tell them what had happened.

"Edward, I don't care if you don't want to protect me anymore, fine. I don't care. But don't leave Edward, what will you do?" She begged.

"I'll move on Bella. Just like you. Even though I won't be able to forget you, I'll be able to distract myself. You will forget soon, human brains are like sieves, the memories are forgotton. Even though I won't ever forget them, I'll become distracted." I said.

"Edward, I will never forget you." She promised.

"Don't worry Bella, you can forget them."

"But I don't want to Edward. I'll cherish them with everything I have. They will be mine Edward. Nothing will make me forget you."

"Except time Bella. There's one more thing I can't do, I can't love you anymore, Bella. I've put you in so much danger, that it's causing it between me and my kind."

"You don't love me?" Her voice cracked as she took in this new piece of information.

"No, Bella. I don't love you anymore because I can't love you anymore, Bella. I've put you in so much danger and it's causing problems between me and my kind."

"I don't care Edward. I will always love you, through no matter what. If I get married, I will be thinking of you. If I have children, I'll always wish they were like you. And when I take my last breath, Edward. My brain will be full of you. I love you Edward."

"Then I'm sorry I can't love you back. You will be in my memories forever Bella, but I can't love you, I don't. But, if you can promise me two things."

"Edward, I love you. So, I will promise you those things." She said, tears hitting the ground, her eyes foggy and her heart aching.

"The first is to look after yourself, for Charlie" I added the last two words on at the end for emphasis. "The second is to forget me and my kind Bella."

"I can promise the first, but I can't promise the second Edward. You know I can't." She stated.

"Then I'll help you. There will be nothing left of me Bella. Only you're memories."

"Don't."

"I'm sorry, Bella. Look after yourself." I turned and ran. I could hear her break down behind me. I stopped behind a big tree. I said in a loud voice. "I love you Isabella Marie Swan, I always will."

I heard her shout. "I love you Edward. More than you'll ever know. I know you can hear me." She stopped for a while, listening for my footsteps. "I love you Edward Cullen." She whispered once more.

That was enough for me. I turned and ran, past the Canadian border. I ran straight to the top of Canada, in a deserted forest. I went into a cave and sat down. I played everything through my head again. Bella's face changing once she knew Alice was gone, when I lied and said I didn't love her, when she shouted out to me, "I love you Edward. More than you'll ever know… I love you Edward Cullen." My body began sobbing, loud, deep sobs that filled my chest, hitting the spot where my dead heart used to be, where there is nothing but the outline of where my love for my Bella used to be. I thought of all our memories together, the meadow, meeting my family, Biology, when she told me she loved me, in Phoenix when my kind almost killed her, when Jasper tried to get to her in her eighteenth birthday party. I remembered all of these and my eyes begun to water. I was crying. Something a vampire could never do unless they'd lost something which meant the world to them. Like, Bella. Then I realized something.

Isabella Marie Swan meant the world to me.

And I left her.

A/N: Hey guys! Hope you liked the beginning of our new story! This isn't the end, there's a whole lot more to come!! Review and tell us if something's wrong!! Thank you xxxx