Aktatsuki-Truth or Dare
Heeeeeeeey everybody! I know I said in my last fanfic that I was going to use my original OC's, and I promise I will in my next one, but my friends are asking me to make one with their OC's in them Tsukimono, Mizuki, and Kiri. Soooo, here is a little one-shot thing with them in it that's totally irrelevant to my other fanfics, but I hope it's still funny and worth your time. I can't put all of the OC's together, because then there would be too many for readers to keep up with. I'd even get confused!
PS: I PUT YAOI IN THIS ONE! W000000T! I wanted to try it out for myself. No lemons, or anything too smutty, but there are couples. Just in this one, though. Not in my others, unless it's 'accidentally' implied.
FW0000T!:
Tobi wandered aimlessly throughout the winding halls of the Akatsuki hideout. It had been a boring couple of weeks. There hadn't been any major missions in a while, and their Dance Dance Revolution had been broken. Kakuzu had lost to Hidan when during the song 'Butterfly' and being the sore loser he was; decided it was wise to rip out the circuitry and use it to re-sew the head of a recently decapitated Jashinist. Hidan got electrocuted, and Kakuzu refused to pay for a new DDR. Twas a sad day in the Akatsuki.
Tobi wanted to do something fun with his friends, but what? He went skipping down the halls to find one of his friends to help him come up with and idea. Wandering into the kitchen, he found Tsukimono, or Tsuki, for short.
"Heeeeeeeey Tsuki!" Tobi said cheerfully and waving to her.
"Heeeeeeeey Tobi! What's up?" she replied just as cheerfully. Tsuki was and ex-waterfall ninja, with a spiky green ponytail. Kakuzu had killed her whole family, but no hard feelings, right?
"Tobi's bored. We should all play a game together, but Tobi doesn't know what to play."
"I'll tell you what we're not going to play, spin the bottle! I had to kiss Kisame twice. He bit my tongue and I couldn't talk for three days. He's cool and all, but that man/shark does not know how to kiss!"
"Hey, don't disrespect Sushi-sensei!" a girl bearing a mist headband entered the room with a scowl. She had long black hair in a ponytail and a blue bang in her face. She had fashioned her bangs after Deidara. She looked up over her square tinted blue-grey sunglasses.
"Oh, hey Mizuki. What's up?"
"What's up? What's up!? What's up is that you're bad-mouthing Sushi-sensei!" she shouted, blowing the bangs out of her face.
"For the love of god, I'm not your sensei anymore!" A certain cerulean shinobi suddenly appeared in the room, rolling his eyes.
"You'll always be my sensei, Sushi-sensei!" Mizuki then did a rather impressive glomp, leaving Kisame stunned and twitching.
Suddenly, a certain raven haired Uchiha gracefully glided into the room. "Hey now, he may be your sensei, but he's my sushi." (I know, that was terrible. You don't have to tell me.) Itachi stood on his toes and planted a light kiss on Kisame's lips. Mizuki and Tsuki 'awwwed', although Tsuki wondered if they made band-aids for mouths. Tobi remained adorably oblivious.
Tobi wanted to get back to the topic and hand, now. "Tobi's still bored! He wants to play a game with everybody."
"Well, what do you want to play, Tobi" Tsuki asked.
"How about Candy Land?" everyone turned their heads as a third girl, Kiri, entered the kitchen, this one bearing a Suna headband. She absentmindedly picked some wax out her cat-like ears jutting out of her purple hair that was in a long ponytail.
"How 'bout, no?" Mizuki commented.
"Fine, I'm hungry anyway." Kiri went to the fridge and removed a leftover hamburger patty along with several questionable condiments. She sat down at the table and began pouring nacho cheese on the patty and topping it with chocolate chips.
"How about ghost in the graveyard?" Itachi suggested.
"NO! Last time we played that I ended up getting mind raped by your Sharingan!" Mizuki shouted.
"You snuck up on me."
"I was the ghost, that's the whole point of the game!"
"STUPID KETCHUP!" the argument came to a stop when Kiri began furiously pounding the near empty plastic ketchup bottle furiously against the table.
Tsuki laughed and walked over to Kiri and stretched out her hand. Kiri handed the bottle over to her and folded her arms and narrowed her eyes in frustration. Tuski began shaking the bottle furiously as her smile soon turned to a scowl of annoyance. The ketchup shall not defeat her. "Stupid…ketchup." She mumbled through shakes that soon turned into her jumping up and down in an attempt to get the red goop out. "You…will…not…defeat…Tsukimono Fukui…damn…you…argh! KETCHUP COFFIN!" Tsuki squeezed the weak bottle with all her might in her outstretched hand, making the bottle burst and the ketchup explode everywhere.
"Well," Kiri said, her face covered with Ketchup, "that's one way to do it." After all, the ketchup did get on her burger. She put the bun on top and chomped into her food, which squished everywhere since it was so full. She didn't bother to wipe her face, since it was already rather messy. Tsuki licked the ketchup around her mouth off, and washed the rest of her face in the sink.
"So," she began, as if nothing had happened, "What game should we play?"
"I propose," everyone's heads once again turned towards the door as another masked man and a silver haired Jashinist stepped in the room, "we play Monopoly."
"Oh fuck no!" Hidan replied to Kakuzu's suggestion. "Last time we played you were the banker and ended up with all the god damn pink fifties! You're a cheater!"
"I wouldn't be talking if I were you, Mr. break-out-of-jail-when-it's-not-even-your-turn-guy!"
"Hey! Why the fuck should I wait? I'm not going to wait for a freakin' get-out-of-jail-free card if I'm really in jail, so why should it be any different in the fucking game?"
"Because it's a game, baka! Cheat all you want in real life, but not in games!"
"Oh, so you want me to cheat on you now, is that it? Fine, then. I'll find another lover. One who cares more about me than money!"
"Oh, real mature, Hidan, ya know-!" At this point everyone just tuned them out. They fought like this more or less every day, but they were always back to, well, almost normal after about an hour or so. They made such a cute couple.
"Ooh, ooh, I know what we could play!" Mizuki blurted out. "It's a game so dangerous, so daring, and so disgusting that only true shinobi are capable of playing it to its full extent." Mizuki's cheerful smile grew to a maniacal one.
"You don't mean-?" Kiri asked, with a similar evil smile, only with not quite the same effect, since her face was still covered in ketchup.
"Oh yes. That's the one."
"Excelent." Tsuki said, tapping the tips of her fingers together in a creepy fashion.
"TRUTH OR DARE!" they all yelled in unison.
Suddenly, the door burst open to reveal a certain blond and a certain red-head.
"I heard truth or dare, un! I wanna play! I wanna play! Doesn't that sound like fun, Danna? Let's play! Let's play! Pleeeaaase?" Deidara whined to Sasori.
Sasori sighed. "Fine, Dei. We can play if you really want to, I suppose."
"Score! Thank you Danna! I love this game, un!"
"Tobi loves this game too! We should get Zetsu, Pein, and Konan to play, too!"
"Don't worry. We're already here." The said trio walked through the door. "We heard the commotion in here and we…uh," Pein did a double take and Kiri's ketchup covered face, but then continued, "We came here to investigate."
"Zetsu!" Tobi skipped over to Zetsu and gave him a hug. Zetsu softened and patted him on the head."
"Tobi is a good boy." He said, witch made Tobi beam under his mask.
"Well," Itachi began, "It appears we're playing truth or dare."
"Why not?" Konan said, "After all, we don't have anything better to do. It sounds fun, doesn't it, Pein?"
"Actually, I have a lot of paper work to get done, and-"
"I said, doesn't that sound like fun, dear?!" Pein wilted under Konan's gaze and Zetsu was smart enough to remain silent. PMS Konan was scary.
"Ok, then. So we're all her to play. Let's go to the living room to play. Oh and Kiri, wash your face, please."
"Yes, Sushi-sama!" Kiri saluted and walked over to the sink.
"Now you're calling me Sushi-sama? You're friend is already calling me Sushi-sensei, what are you going to call me, Tsuki?"
"How about…Sushi-sempai?"
"I was joking!" Kisame yelled. Itachi threw is arm around him. "Why must they torture me so, Itachi?" Itachi merely snuggled closer in Kisame's chest.
They all walked to the Aktatsuki living room and found their seats on the comfy black cloth couches and armchairs around the outside of the rather small room.
"Ok, then. Who wants to start?" Kiri asked with a creepy smile as if to really say 'who wants to begin the nightmarish torture?'
"I shall begin!" Kiri shouted. "Deidara, truth or dare?"
"Tch, DARE! Of course, un."
"Ok, then I dare you to…ummm…uhhh…heeheehee! I have a good one! Deidara, I dare you to sing-along to and dance to this song." Kiri walked over to the CD player on a table in the corner of the room and popped in a CD from a pile of them.
"I swear to god, if it's 'Dude Looks Like a Lady,' again, I'm going to kill someone, un!"
"No no no, it's better." She said giggling.
"Better than 'Dude Looks Like a Lady"? Hidan asked. "Man that was the best!"
Deidara shot Hidan an evil death glare. "Fine, un" Deidara said with some dread in his voice as he hopped off Sasori's lap and walked to the middle of the room as the song began to play loudly.
YO, I'll tell ya what I want, what I really, really want!
So tell me what ya want, what ya really, really, want!
I'll tell ya what I want, what I really, really want!
So tell me what ya want, what ya really, really, want!
Deidara looked at the crowd watching him with pure terror. Diedara simply despised this song. Mizuki, Kiri, and Tsuki looked at him expectantly. Deidara knew the rules of the game. He had to do the dare, no matter how humiliating or mentally scarring it may be. Deidara thrust his hips to the left and then to the right to the beat of the song and the four girls and Tobi tapped their feet and bobbed their heads to the song. Deidara flipped his blond hair and threw his hands above his head as the chorus came on.
If ya wanna be my lover, ya gotta get with my friends. Deidara pointed to Sasori and pursed his lips in a kissing action.
Make it lasts forever, friendship never ends.
If ya wanna be my lover, you have got to give.
Taking is too easy, but that's the way it is.
Deidara put his hands on his hips and pivoted making his blond hair flip. He walked to the other end of the room like he was strutting on the catwalk. Everyone looked rather amused at this. He then proceeded to spin himself around on his butt on the ground. Hidan, Tobi, Tsuki, Mizuki, and Kiri started cracking up in hysterical laughter, while everyone else either looked amused, turned on, or just disgusted. Then, still spinning, he stretched his body out on the floor and stopped so he was resting his head in his hand and smiled seductively. Deidara did various other dances that resembled seizures. When the song finally came to and end, he licked his finger and made a sizzling sound as he put it to his ass. Everybody clapped as he strutted back to his seat on Sasori's lap. That song isn't so bad.
"Ok, un. Now it's my turn. Ok, Mizuki, truth or dare!" he asked loudly.
"Truth!" she responded.
"Ok, un. If the Akatsuki wasn't gay, witch one of us would you date?"
Misuki blushed beneath her sunglasses. Deidara smiled, and some of the others made 'ooohs' of pity, and perhaps fear. "Ummm, well, if I had to choose I'd choose, I suppose it would be um…"
"Yes?"
"Uuuummmmm…"
"YES?"
"ItwouldbeyouDeidara!" she blurted quickly, but everyone caught it, and everyone but Mizuki and Deidara laughed, since his dare had totally backfired on him. Sasori smiled to himself. He had the best boyfriend. In all your faces.
"I'm sorry, but it's true!" Mizuki exclaimed, "No making fun of me for this!"
"Ooooh no!" Kiri said, "The whole point of the game is that we can make fun of anything and everything that you have to say or do, or else the game just isn't any fun! That being said, Hahaha! You like Deidara!"
"I do not! Who was I supposed to choose? Zetsu?"
Zetsu looked down at the floor in shame. "Zuzu needs love!" Tsuki shouted as she tackled the plant-man in a hug, and Tobi soon followed. This did not make him feel much better. Poor Zuzu.
"Ok, it's my turn now, so Itachi, I choose you!" Mizuki shouted.
"He's not a pokemon." Tsuki commented.
"Itachi, truth or dare?"
Itachi sighed. "Dare, I suppose."
"Cool, then. I dare you to, hehe, I dare you to KISS DEIDARA'S HANDMOUTHS!"
"What, un? Why do all of these involve me, un? This is a conspiracy against me, isn't it?"
"Yes, Dei. We all wanted to play this game just so we could gang up on you, because everyone is out to get you."
"Really, un?"
Mizuki sighed. "Sarcasm is wasted on you, Deidara."
"Ok, that's enough." Tsuki said. "This is Itachi's dare. So Itachi, are you going to do it?" she asked.
Itachi stared at Mizuki. Then he stared and Deidara. Then at Mizuki again. Well, it was more of a petrifying glare than a stare. All was silent as they anticipated the Uchiha's response. Suddenly the Uchiha stood up and slowly walked over to the blond without making a sound. Everyone's eyes followed him as he walked. Because Deidara was sitting, Itachi seemed to tower over him. Deidara wilted under his fierce gaze.
"AAHH! What the hell, un?" Deidara shouted suddenly. Itachi had swooped down and smashed Deidara's hand to his own lips so quickly that no one even saw him move. Deidara screamed again and again as Itachi held the position for several seconds with his eyes squeezed tightly shut. Everyone was either laughing or smiling, except for Sasori and Kisame, who where petrified at what their lovers were doing to each other.
Itachi pulled away and slowly walked towards the door of the room.
"I-Itachi? Where are you going?" Kisame asked quietly.
"To brush my teeth." Itachi said, smacking his lips together. "His hand mouths taste like clay." He left without another word.
After several seconds of silence, Deidara got up and did the same of Itachi.
"Deidara? Now where are you going?" Sasori asked.
"To boil my hand. His mouth tasted like Uchiha and old sushi." At this last comment, Deidara shot an unseen glare and Kisame and walked briskly out of the room.
After a long, awkward silence, Hidan spoke up. "Well," he began, "it's Itachi's turn to go, so what are we supposed to do until then?"
"We wait, I suppose." Kakuzu said.
Sasori groaned at this. "I hate waiting." He mumbled.
"You need to get some patience, Sasori, and…Tsuki what are you doing?" Mizuki asked Tsuki, who was staring off into space with her head gently swaying back and forth. She let out a small giggle and returned to her swaying.
Mizuki sighed. "Tsuki, what are you thinking of right now?"
"Ya' know the tongue-twister 'how much wood could a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood?'" she asked her friend.
Mizuki sighed. "Yeah, what about it?" she asked, as if this kind of thing happened on a regular basis.
"Well, what does it mean, exactly, 'to chuck'? I mean, what would one do, if one wanted to chuck wood? How would someone go about doing that?"
Mizuki tapped her chin thoughtfully with the tip of her finger. "That's actually a good question, which is strange. Hmmm, let's look it up in the dictionary." Mizuki got up to the large bookshelf across the room, filled with untouched and unknown books.
"We have a dictionary?" Zetsu asked.
"We have a bookshelf?" Tobi asked.
Mizuki got flipped through the pages of the dictionary in the 'C' section. "Let's see, hmmm. Cheese, Chuck E. Cheez, Chuck Norris, whoops, went too far. Ahh, here we are. 'CHUCK-verb-what a wood chuck could do…if it could chuck wood.'" She blinked at this definition for several seconds.
"Well, damn." Kiri said. "I guess we'll never know the definition of the word 'chuck.'"
"That's disappointing." Tsuki said, "And now I'm over it." She stated.
Just then, Deidara came screaming into the room, grasping his hand and spinning around in confused circles. "What's wrong, Dei? Please don't tell me that you actually boiled your hand." Deidara stopped his crazy screaming and spinning for a brief moment to glare at Sasori.
"No, un. I didn't boil my hand. I'm not that stupid, un." Hidan snorted. "But a certain someone," Deidara said, glaring at Tobi, "replaced the mint toothpaste with his pinkalicious double-yum cotton candy rainbow flavored toothpaste. You know I'm allergic to pink, un!"
Tobi bowed his head and sank further into Zetsu's lap. "Tobi's sorry, sempai, but Tobi thinks it tastes good. It's better than gross mint." He said sheepishly, pointing his fingers together shyly.
"Hey, ya know what else is gross, un?" He asked angrily. "This!" Deidara thrust his hand in front of Tobi's eyehole. Tobi saw Deidara's hand and screamed as he fell off Zetsu's lap in surprise. Deidara's hand was covered in hives and bumps that were oozing a yellow colored puss.
Zetsu also caught a glimpse of the hand and winced in disgust. He sighed. "Here, Deidara, take some of this and rub it on your hand." His white side said, as he reached up and broke off a spike of the plant surrounding his head, which immediately grew back. "This has some healing powers, so it should take away the reaction."
Deidara slowly reached out his hand to grab the part of the plant, with suspicion etched on his face. 'Th-thanks, un." He sat back down on Sasori's lap and he began to rub the plant on his burning hand. The pain quickly disappeared. "Hey, it's working, un!"
"You sound surprised."
"Hey, wait a minute, if Zetsu's plant can heal rashes, then I was right. He is an Aloe Vera!" Mizuki shouted. "Tsuki, you owe me five dollars!"
"Nuh-uh! I still think he resembles that of a Venus Flytrap more. I'm not paying you!"
"I still think he's a cactus." Kiri mumbled.
"Wait a minute, did you guys ever think just to ask me what kind of plant I was?" Zetsu asked angrily.
"Your absolutely right, Zetsu." Mizuki asked. "What kind of plant are you, then?"
Zetsu opened is mouth to answer, but then shut it. "Um," he started, "I-I don't really know, actually."
"Yeah, it's always just kinda been there. I never really gave it much thought as to what it actually was."
"Well, ok then." Tsuki said. "Let's vote on it. Who think Zetsu should be an Aloe Vera?" Six members raised their hands.
"Hey, shouldn't I get to decide what I get to be?" every member simultaneously said no.
"And who thinks he should be a Venus Flytrap?" Five members raised their hands. "And a cactus?" Kiri raised her hand. "Ok, Mizuki. Here's your five dollars. Zetsu's officially an Aloe Vera."
"But, that's so lame." Zetsu mumbled. He was ignored by all.
Just then Itachi silently walked in, smacking his lips. He didn't really mind Tobi's pinkalicious double-yum cotton candy rainbow flavored toothpaste.
"Ok, Itachi, it's your turn. Choose someone."
Itachi nodded. "Ok, Kiri, truth or dare?"
"Ummm, DARE!" she shouted with confidence.
Itachi had a blank look on his face. (Not that this was unusual.) "Uhhhh, ummm. I don't know. I can't think of one. Kiri, think of something disgusting for yourself."
"Jeez, Itachi." Hidan said. "You have no creativity! Seriously, I mean-!"
"It's ok, Hidan. I'm all over this." Kiri then took off her leggings and ninja sandals. Everyone sitting around her suddenly got woozy.
"Oh man," Sasori began, covering his mouth with his hand, "I can't even smell and that's making me- oh God!" Sasori leaned to his left and gagged.
Kiri smirked. "Watch this!" she said. Kiri then grabbed her ankle and reached her foot up to her mouth. She stuck her tongue out and ran it up the length of her foot, leaving a trail of saliva. Kisame let out a girly sigh and fainted, while Kakuzu let out an extremely high pitched scream. The rest either, twitched, gagged puked, or just looked away in disgust, or all three. "Hmmm," Kiri said, while tapping her chin with her finger. "Needs ketchup." She then took her finger and inserted it into her cat-like ears. She searched around before she was able to scoop out a finger-full of ketchup from the earlier 'ketchup coffin.' Her finger spread over her foot, and was soon followed by her tongue, again. Everyone either bolted from the room or fainted along with Kisame. Kiri licked her lips and looked up. She then realized that she was the only awake person in the room. Along with her were an unconscious Tobi, Kisame, Itachi, Sasori, Konan, Pein, and Hidan. Once this registered in her mind, and evil grin spread across her face.
15 minutes later…
Tsuki stumbled back to the room with Mizuki and the other, all wiping vomit from their faces. Tsuki walked in first, and when she saw the scene before her, was unsure how to react. "K-Kiri, what-how-what did you-?"
Mizuki entered just after Tsuki and began to stutter along with her. Kiri just sat there on her armchair and putting the cap on a Sharpie and placing it in her pocket. She looked quite pleased with herself. The rest of the members entered the room and just stared. Kiri then produced a bullhorn out of nowhere, and yelled into it. "Hey Akatsuki, wakey wakey!" the members slowly raised their heads and moaned as they got back in their seats.
"What happened?" Konan asked.
"You all passed out when I licked my foot."
"Oh yeah." She said.
"As Leader of Akatsuki, I forbid you to ever remove your shoe again."
"Uhhhh, Kisame," Itachi began. "You have a little something on your face."
"What? Uhh, hehe, so do you Itachi." They both got up and walked over to the mirror on the wall, and they both paled when they saw the black marker designs all over their faces. Itachi had three whiskers on his cheeks, a blackened in triangle on his nose, and two earlike triangles on his forehead. Kisame just had whiskers on his face.
"Get it, you guys, Itachi's a weasel, and Sushi-sama's a catfish. Everyone but Kisame and Itachi seemed amused.
"I wouldn't be laughing if I were you, Hidan." Kakuzu said through high-pitched giggles. "In fact, none of you who were unconscious should be laughing." The laughter stopped immediately as all those in the room got up to look at the mirror. There were screams, there were also laughs at others, but there were mostly screams.
"Oh my Jashin! You put a cross on my forehead! It burns! It burns!" Hidan screamed, trying to rub it off with the palm of his hand. Seeing this wasn't working, he dove over the furniture to Kakuzu. Hidan ripped off his mask and slammed it on his own face, leaving Kakuzu slightly shocked, since Hidan always made fun of his headgear. Hidan adjusted it and sat back down on the sofa with his arms crossed. "Jashin will smite you for this." He mumbled.
"I can't believe you did this to my face, brat!" Looking at the scribbly goatee eyebrows on his face. "Sharpie won't come off of my wooden face. I'll have to replace it entirely!" Sasori ran to his workshop to 'put on his face.' (Hehe, lame pun, hehe)
"I don't know, I kina like mine." Konan said, whose face was decorated with vines and cartoon versions of roses. "It matches my hair, and personality. I might keep it like this for a day or two."
"Tobi, it's all over your face."
"Really, where?" Tobi turned to the side and snatched a small mirror from Hidan's pocket that he used to admire his own smexiness regularly. He faced the wall and removed his mask. "Silly Zuzu, Tobi thinks you need to get your eyes checked. There's nothing on my face." Tobi put his mask back on that had a swirly moustache and an eye patch where the other eyehole should have been.
"I don't get it." Itachi said. "Why am I a weasel?" he asked.
"Dude your name means weasel, duh! You can thank your parents for that one." Tsuki said.
"My parents are dead." Itachi replied.
"And whose fault is that?" Tsukimono asked.
"Mine." Itachi hung his head and pointed his finger together like Hinata.
Pein was enraged. In addition to his already piercing-decorated face, were hearts, rainbows, flowers, a tic-tac-tow board with the O's winning, and other cheery things of evil. He slowly turned his face to look and the smiling Kiri, with the light casting shadows of evil one his face. "I demand you to remove all of this immediately, or suffer the consequences!"
"Awww, but I worked hard on those faces. I like them."
"I don't care if these faces took you all damn day, I want my face clean, now!"
"Hmph!" Kiri turned her head to the side, stuck her nose up in the air and threw her ears back.
"Why don't you try asking her nicely, sweety?"
"Konan, did you see my face? I refuse-!"
"I said, why don't you try asking her nicely, sweety?!" Pein cowered and paled. Kiri like being friends with scary PMS Konan.
"O-ok. Kiri, p-please, if it's not too much trouble, g-get something to remove this marker."
Kiri looked at Pein and smiled. "Awww, jeez. All you had to do was ask." She then bolted from the room and came back shortly with a bottle. The label had been ripped off, showing a clear liquid inside. "Here, this stuff will get permanent marker right off you skin." she removed a tissue from the box one the shelf and dipped it in the bottle. "Ok, who's first?" Pein stepped forward.
"I'm the leader, so I'll go first." He stated plainly he sat down as Kiri dabbed the solution on his face. The marker came right off, and all was well, until Pein started screaming in…pain. (Hehe, more lame puns) He was rolling around on the floor holding his face as it turned bright red and began to burn. "Kiri, what is that stuff? It burns!"
"This?" Kiri said, looking at the bottle. "It's nail-polish remover. It takes Sharpie right off of skin." She said cheerfully.
"You..baka…that's for nails, not for skin!"
Kiri looked right, then left, then right again. "Ooooooooh, hehe, my bad."
"Yes! Yes it is your bad!" Pein shouted in pain. (lol, that never gets old.)
"Well, it's the only thing that will get your faces clean right away, so it's up to you. Agonizing pain, or decorated faces."
Itachi took one more look at his face that could only be described as 'cute' before he snatched the bottle from Kiri and scrubbed his face with it. He began to scream, but he was soon followed by the other members, except Konan, who liked hers, and Tobi, who was oblivious to the marker covering his mask. The room was soon filled with screams of the burning victims, except for Hidan, who seemed to like it. Hidan then resolved to bathe in the burning liquid from now on. (a petition was soon started by Pein to stop this because everyone got high when Hidan was in the same room as them. No one signed it, though, because everyone got high when Hidan was in the same room as them.)(1)
Once the screaming had receded, everyone sat back down in their seats. Sasori soon returned, with his face several shades darker.
"I was out of the wood that I usually use, so I had to use cherry wood." He put Deidara on his lap, who took a big whiff of his face.
"You smell nice, un. And you look tanner. I like it."
"Really? You think so?"
Deidara answered him by latching onto Sasori's lips. The couple began to viciously suck face.
"Ok, Kiri, it's your turn." Konan said.
Everyone winced in fear at what was to come.
"Ok, who hasn't been tormented yet? Hmmm, let's see, Kisame, truth or dare?"
Kisame decided to choose the lesser of the two evils. "Truth."
"Ok, here's the deal, Kisame. I don't believe what you've been telling us is true. I don't think your 'sharky' chakra makes you look the way you do. So tell me, how did you really get to look how you do now.
Damn! Kisame thought. For the honor of the game, I can't lie about that this time. I'm so screwed.
"Ok, here's what went down." Kisame gulped and broke out in a sweat. "It all stared when my dad took a trip to Sea World with his buddies. He went to the shark tank with a six-pack of beer and CENSORED#BEEPBEEP with the shark and BEEPCENSORED&!CENSORED with a bucket of BEEEEEEEPCENSORED and Shamu CENSORED&#!BEEEEPCENSOREDCOVERYOUREARSKIDDIES! and once they painted the dolphins they CENSOREDMEGABEEEEEEB in the penguin tank BEEEPCENSORED#& and once he got out of jail, he visited her at Sea World in disguise every day until I was born and he took custody of me. And that's how things went down." No one slept for a week after that.
"Ok, Kisame. It's your turn now."
"Oooooh no! I think we're done here. That enough evil for one day." Pein said.
"I second that." Zetsu said.
"I third that." Zetsu also said.
"Yeah let's play a simpler game next time." Sasori said.
"I suggested Candy Land, but you guys shot me down." Kiri said.
"Ya know what," Kakuzu said, "Candy Land sounds nice. Let's play that next time."
"Yeah, nothing bad can happen in Candy Land." Tsuki said.
They all agreed. Next time they would play Candy Land, for no one ever got hurt in the Candy Cane forests or Plum Tree Groves…yet.
I do not approve of getting high. Don't do it, kiddies! It's fun to joke about, but getting high makes your brain turn to oatmeal and leak out your ears! So unless you have no brain or just really enjoy oatmeal, don't get high.
Hahaha! The evil is complete. This was going just to be a oneshot, but I might make a sequel with Candy Land, if I can come up with enough ideas. Then I'll get back to my other OC's. I have ideas for them, too. Sound fun, right? Mizuki, Kiri, hope you enjoyed this. It took me forever.
R&R please! Seriously, just click the button below to leave a comment. It's not that hard, unless you have no fingers. But then it would be kind of hard to get to this story in the first place, now wouldn't it?