In the confines of her isolated bedroom, Manny was wishfully staring at a picture of her mother. With her legs under her childish purple butterfly covers and her left hand holding a white picture frame, her eyes gazed longingly at the attractive woman. She heard a knock on her door and quickly came back to reality.

"Are you ready to go ?" asked her dad.

"Yes I am," she said as she placed the picture back on her nightstand next to her diary and various other photographs of her family in their own colorful complimentary frames. She hears her father leave the house quickly with a slight slam to the front door. She sighs quickly, rubs a small tear from her eye, and rushes to the door.

Talking a deep breath, she sums up all of her courage just to get out of the door and to get into the car. She gets into the family van and her father backs out of the driveway.

They take the scenic route to the church where the funeral was being held. They passed the various family houses with front lawns manicured and picket fences. She tries not to think about who may have been the one to fix the vegetation surrounding the homes. She becomes overwhelmingly thankful when they arrive to the church and she can get out the car.

She quickly jumps out of the seat and opens the door (which is then proceeded to be shut forcefully) as she makes her way to the front of the church. It's only when Mrs. Thompson, a friend of her mothers, asks where her father is. She turns around with a slight, "Oh," and walks swiftly back to get him. He's sitting in the front seat with his seat belt still guarding him. But from what, Manny doesn't know. She fortunately is able to get him out of his trance as they walk into the church together and sit down in the front row.

With everyone gathered, the Priest stands up behind the pulpit and begins to speak about her mother. But his biblical verses mean nothing to Manny as her mind wanders around the confines of the church.

Besides her mind, Manny's eyes gaze across all of the people in the church as well. The various faces that are now taking up space in the myriad of pews gracing the room. She bitterly thought to herself, 'I can not believe all these people came. Some of them don't even like my mom.' Her thoughts were quickly interrupted by the aging Priest.

"I would like for a family member or a love one to come up and something about Julietta Santos."

Manny's father stood from his seat next to her and snakingly walked up to the pulpit to stand where the Priest once was.

"I knew my wife for 20 years," he began quietly. His fingers where shaking as he made them hold the corners of the wood to keep them steady from trembling. "And there is not one thing…I could ever find…bad about her," he said as his voice trembled, threatening to break.

"She was sweet, caring, and funny. She always knew how to make a person laugh," he continued a slight smile on his face. His eyes looked up from the pulpit as he began to look towards his surrounding mourners. His smile became brighter when he realized how exactly true his words was.

He watched as others in the church started to smile as well.

"And she loved her daughter," he said looking at Manny. Manny couldn't help but blush as he singled her out amongst the crowd. She smiled slightly at his words, but then quickly became saddened once again realizing how concrete the death of her mother was.

"I know that I will never find another woman like her," he finished his voice thick with sorrow. With her father's words, Manny realized how her life would never be normal ever again. The comforting arm that her father, Joseph, slung around her when he returned didn't help her much. And as the mourners all walked outside to watch her mother's coffin become lost in the dirt ground of the cemetery, she nearly broke inside. But she had to be strong for her father. So she bit her lip, fought back the tears, and became the man her father wished she had been when she was born.

While Joseph was driving the car home, he chanced a glance at his daughter Manny. "How are you doing ?" he inquired.

She didn't say anything. She kept her eyes focused on the road.

"I see that you didn't cry at the funeral," he pointed out worriedly.

"What is the point? It is not going to bring her back," she said looking out the window. Her eyes were dead.

"I know you feel that way now but after a while you are going to want to cry," he said hoping to get some response. "When you do I will be here for you."

Manny didn't say anything as she continued to stare blankly out the window.

***Three weeks later***

Manny was sitting at her desk during her regular mathematics class at school. She had forgotten to do her homework and now was attempting to pretend like she did it. Acting was her gift, after all. Okay, she lied. She didn't forget. She just didn't feel like it…It was like there was the void in her chest that prohibited her from ever completing a task. She just didn't care anymore. Her eyes wandered outside as she began to tune out the conversation the class was sharing.

"Can you tell me what 12x6 is ?" asked Mrs. June.

Emma raise her hand. "Is it 72?" Emma asked studiously.

"That is right," Mrs. June replied. "Manny Santos, can you tell me what 3x14 is?"

Manny snapped her eyes from the window and to Mrs. June. She blushed feverishly. "I don't know," she said timidly.

"You would know if you did the homework," said Mrs. June sharply.

Manny replied calmly, "I didn't want to do it."

"Are you getting smart with me?" asked Mrs. June. She had begun to walk towards Manny with a step that was similar to the military sergeants at the nearby military base.

"Maybe I am? What are you going to do about it," said Manny with an edge to her tone.

"Well," began Mrs. June slightly stunned, "I am going to give you a detention. For two weeks. "

Manny laid her head on the desk. The cool material of the desk set apart her hot skin. 'I hate this school,' Manny thought to herself.

As class finished, Manny quickly grabbed her books and headed out the door. As she walked through the halls toward her next class of the day, she was followed quickly by Emma.

"Hey Manny," she said. "What was with you in class?" she asked worriedly.

"Nothing," Manny stated. Emma encouragingly grabbed Manny's arm.

"Come on Manny, I never seen you acted that way before," she said.

"People act different when they lose someone," said Manny.

Emma stopped walking. "What?"

"My mother, Emma, my mother. Dead. Dead. Dead," said Manny brutally. She scoffed at Emma. Though she had paused in her walking to reply to Emma, she quickly began to set the pace again.

"Manny, why didn't you tell me your mother died," Emma said as she jogged up to her.

Manny stopped walking again and turned around and looked at Emma. "Because I didn't want to hear you say I am sorry or how I am doing," said Manny. "I am just so sick and tried of everybody asking me that same damn question."

"Alright I won't ask you that but you should of told me," said Emma.

"Why?" asked Manny.

"Because I am your best friend and I wanted to be their to help you get through it," said Emma. "I'm here for you, ya know. You're my bestest friend!" Emma's smile began to grow wider as she spoke her words to Manny. She reached out to give a hug to Manny but found her arms empty.

"I can get through it perfect fine by myself," said Manny and she walked away from Emma.

Rather than serve a detention, Manny was outside underneath the nearby oak tree. She felt her head grow limp and soon found herself sleeping peacefully in the shade.

Manny was at home.

"Mom where are you?," she called.

"Here I am honey, don't worry," said her Mom.

"I had a bad dream," said Manny.

"About what? Tell me," said her Mom.

"That you were dead and I was unhappy and sad all the time," said Manny.

"It was just a dream. I am not going anywhere. I am never going to leave you," said her Mom. Manny felt the wet kiss accompanied by her mother's red lipstick as she kissed her forehead. Then she heard her Mom's soft soprano voice began to sing into her ear…

"Manny wake up!"

"Mom?" she inquired. She rubbed her eyes and saw JT staring at her from her feet.

"You were dreaming," he said bluntly.

She got up off the ground. And rubbed the dirt off of her jeans.

"What do you want?"

"I wanted to tell you that detention is over," he said.

"Thanks." She grabbed her bag off the ground and put it on her shoulder.

"I heard about what happened," said JT sadly. He had turned away from her and was now staring past her towards the school because he, too, knew the feeling of loss.

"Yeah," she said slowly.

"I am so sorry," he said honestly.

"Don't be sorry people die all the time. It is no big deal," Manny said emotionless.

JT looked at her weirdly but he didn't say anything.

"Listen, I have to go to class but I will see you later," she said. Then quickly walked off leaving JT there by himself.

After school, Manny ran to her locker and grabbed her books and her remaining spirals and was about to close the locker door when she saw a red envelope out of the corner of her eye. There was "Manny" written in loopy scrawl on the front. But rather than awe at it's beauty and what it could possibly contain, she grabbed it, stuck it in her backpack, closed the metal door swiftly, and left school in a hurry.

She was walking down the street when she bumped into someone.

"Hey watch where you are going!" he shouted at her.

"I am not the one walking on the wrong side of the street," she said. She looked up from the sidewalk that she had been preoccupied with and looked up.

"Craig," she said bluntly.

"Oh Manny, I am so sorry. I didn't know it was you," he apologized.

"What are you doing back in Toronto?" she asked quietly. She quickly searched his brown eyes for any sign of the attachment that they had had previously.

"I am here because my touring around the world is over. So I can stay for a while," he said.

"How is Ashley doing, your girlfriend?"

"She is not my girlfriend," he began. "I mean…"

"Last time I checked when people let their ex-girlfriend go on tour with them, they end up getting back together," she said sharply.

"We did end up dating again," he started to explain.

"That is all I needed to know," she said walking away from him. She only walked a few feet when she heard the familiar rhythm of feet walking behind her. She turned and saw that it was Craig.

"Manny, wait!" Manny paused and stood there as she waited for Craig to continue. "We are not together anymore," he said.

"Sure you are not," she said rolling her eyes. She had had enough and was quickly about to become furious. She needed to escape so her emotions didn't hinder whatever else could come out of her mouth. She began to walk again as she heard Craig yelling behind her.

"We tried to date again, but it didn't work out," he tried to explain again. "Because we had too many different things in our life- SO WE BROKE UP!"

Manny stopped walking and turned around.

"Where is Miss Kerwin now?" asked Manny.

"She is probably at home or dating Jimmy again. I don't know," he said shrugging.

"You think you can come here now and tell me all this stuff and I am supposed to jump in your arms," she said sarcasm lacing every word. "Because if that is what you are looking for me to do keep dreaming," she said.

"Manny I know I hurt you last time," he said.

"NO YOU DIDN'T HURT ME CRAIG! YOU BROKE MY HEART AND TO MAKE MATTERS WORST YOU WROTE A SONG ABOUT ME SAYING I WAS A THONG GIRL WRONG GIRL," she yelled. She was now completely ticked off. She felt the blood rushing to her face and her knuckles began to feel the need to punch something. Hard.

"I was going though a lot of things in rehab," he said.

"I HAVE BEEN GOING THOUGH A LOT OF THINGS TOO," she yelled. She took a deep breath and then continued. "THINGS THAT I THOUGHT I WOULD NEVER SEE OR HAVE TO DEAL WITH," she yelled again.

"It can't be as bad as having addiction to drugs," said Craig dumbly.

Manny rolled her eyes.

"Right now, the way I feel, I wish I was on drugs or anything to feel numb, to not feel pain," she said wishfully.

"Did something happen to you or your family when I was gone?" asked Craig.

Craig's words triggered a memory and Manny had a flashback to when she was at Craig's concert.

Craig is on stage.

Jay and Manny are having a argument.

"I told you that I wanted to be left alone," she said.

"I know but I am your boyfriend," he said.

"YOU ARE NOT MY BOYFRIEND! YOU MEAN NOTHING TO ME, NOT A THING," she yelled.

"THAT IS IT! I AM DONE!"

"Done with what?" asked Manny.

"Done with this relationship," said Jay.

"I am sorry but you know why I act this way," said Manny.

"Sorry is not going to work this time Manny," he said.

"I understand your mother is real sick but that is no reason to act like a b***," he said.

"So you are going to just leave me?" she said upset.

"Yeah, because I can't deal with you anymore," said Jay.

Jay then walked away from Manny leaving her their by herself.

Manny was upset and started crying when she heard Craig start singing.

She walked to the front of the stage and when she saw Craig, she was shocked.

Manny saw Craig singing on stage with Ashley.

Manny ran out of the place and ran to her car and got in.

"Why Craig? Why did you do this?," she said to herself.

"WHY? WHY? WHY?," she said hitting the steel wheel.

Manny stopped hitting the wheel and laid her head on it and cried.

Manny pulled herself away from the flashback and focused on Craig again. She saw his wondering eyes and sympathetic gaze.

"Tell me what is wrong?" asked Craig

"It is none of your dam business," said Manny viciously.

"Don't worried about me, the only one you should care about is Ashley. She is the only one you truly love anyway." And then Manny left Craig and walked away into the rest of the day.

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