Three Little Words

Alyna screwed her eyes shut as she yawned deeply, the parchment she had been reading falling to her chest. It was not a habit of hers to read in bed, but the sudden urge had come over her and she was now remembering why she always sat at her modest desk to read – she was falling asleep, and it was only late afternoon. She decided the best thing to do was to resume her normal habits, and she swung her legs around and sat up carefully so as not to hit her head on the cot above her own. Like all lieutenants, she bunked with her unit when they were at their barracks. By virtue of her rank she got to choose a bottom bunk next to the biggest desk.

An amused chuckle met her ears and she looked up to see a dark-haired female elf enter the barracks, dressed in jogging attire. Kyala was a new addition to her unit, and had fit in well. She was a highly experienced ranger, having been one for the last two hundred years. Alyna had recently lost her most senior ranger to retirement, and Sylvanas had thought it prudent to fill the considerable knowledge gap he had left. Alyna had resisted at first, seeing it as an affront to her own ability, but Kyala's easy going nature had quickly calmed Alyna's fear of being undermined by the newcomer. Kyala's advice had always been spot on, and she had always raised issues privately and never in front of the unit. Alyna respected her deeply for that as much as she cursed her own insecurities.

"You look like you just woke from a long sleep," teased the older woman.

Alyna smiled and consciously brushed her fingers through her mussed shoulder-length hair. "Ah, I never know what to do with my hair anymore. It gets in the way when I grow it out, and develops a life of its own when short." Her burgundy mane resumed its default tousled state after she was done combing it, as if to prove a point.

Kyala moved to a bedside cabinet next to one of the bunks and replied as she rummaged through it for something, "I've seen some of Parwen's unit using some kind of gel to hold their hair in place. He's even got his own in spikes right now." Alyna could hear amusement and not disapproval in Kyala's tone.

Alyna laughed. "Could you imagine Sylvanas' reaction if I went to the next briefing with my hair in spikes?"

Kyala cocked her head slightly. "Would she react though? I've not seen her react to anything yet."

"Oh, she reacts," assured Alyna. "She has a complex series of facial twitches, eyebrow raises and eye movements that give her away. Though, she controls her ears well. I'm not quite sure how she manages that bit, but she does." High elves had long, slender ears that moved subtly with their owner's emotional state. It was mostly involuntary, though their captain had somehow mastered the muscles behind it.

Kyala ducked her head almost inside the cabinet, pulling things out as she spoke. "She's probably had the muscles cut. I've heard some of the magi do that so they don't give away anything when they're playing at politics."

"Why would anyone mutilate themselves in such a way? And they don't do that. Not that I've seen, anyway."

A dark head reappeared to look in Alyna's direction. "Oh, that's right. Your family are magisters aren't they?"

Alyna stood and stepped up to her desk where a candle flickered gently. She glanced at Kyala as she held the parchment she had been reading over the flame. "Mmhmm," she confirmed. She watched as the flame ignited the parchment and she dropped the rapidly burning document into the metal bin next to her desk.

"Well, I've known people be bored by books before but I've not seen them react quite like that to a bad plot."

Alyna looked at Kyala and blinked in confusion before looking back at the bin. "Oh!" She laughed. "That's a letter from my family, not a book. And I'm burning it because it's more of the same and not worth keeping."

"Ah, ha!" cried Kyala in triumph as she pulled out a dull strip of cloth from the back of the cabinet. She was surrounded by all sorts of knickknacks and small objects that Alyna was absolutely sure were pointless outside of whatever sentimentality was attached to them. Kyala was a hoarder, and if a present was gifted to her she never threw it out or passed it on. She was currently wrapping the piece of well-used cloth around her forehead to keep her hair back from her face. Once she was done she gave Alyna her full attention. "You've had quite a few letters from home lately."

Alyna moved around to Kyala to help her clear up the mess she had made, kneeling next to her as she did so. "I really should empty the bin. They've all suffered the same inglorious fate." Her eyes flicked up to Kyala's face briefly before she quietly added, "To be honest, I consider these barracks my home."

"Ah. I may have heard a thing or two about your relationship with your family," Kyala admitted.

"I'm sure you have. I'm willing to bet it's also all true," replied Alyna dismissively, too focused on trying to fit various objects into place on their shelves. It was requiring some creative thinking to get them all in.

"If you don't mind my asking, if they don't approve of you being a ranger, why are you getting so many letters of late? Are they trying to convince you to leave?" Kyala jumped slightly as a toy she was holding randomly squeaked.

Alyna didn't respond for a few seconds, taking the time to decide if she was going to reply fully or not. She decided if Kyala was going to be her advisor, she might as well let the woman know what was going on.

"It's my hundredth birthday soon. They … want me to go home for a celebration, and yes my guess is they'll try to make sure I remain in Silvermoon."

Kyala beamed at her so brightly Alyna couldn't help but smile back. "It's your hundredth? Congratulations! You're only a hundred once y'know, so better make the best of it. Ah! I remember mine very fondly. Do the others know?"

Alyna's eyes widened in panic. "No! They don't!" She bit her lip as she calmed herself, "And I'd appreciate it if you didn't tell them. I've never been one for parties and would rather keep it that way."

Alyna knew Kyala was watching her carefully now as she put the last trinket into the cabinet and closed the doors. She knew the question was coming, so she decided to head it off. "I've an older brother and sister who liked to humiliate me at my childhood parties, particularly as I wasn't showing any magical talent and my friends were. I just don't like parties, so, please if you hear of one being planned, put a stop to it?"

Kyala put her hand on Alyna's arm and squeezed softly. "I will. I don't think anyone here will humiliate you as they did – we'd celebrate your life and your decision to be with us. But, if they make you uncomfortable I'll make sure nothing happens."

Alyna looked at Kyala gratefully. "Thank you." She saw Kyala look at the bin again and she was braced for the next question, but the other woman appeared to think she had pried enough as she then thanked Alyna for helping clear her mess, and then left for her run.

Alyna moved over to the bin and looked into it. It was half-full with ash. The parchments had been bursting with congratulations for her centenary, and they had made her feel sick. The ones from her family were bad enough, with false platitudes describing how they wished to celebrate her life with her in person, but there were other letters from friends of her family with more of the same. There were even a few names that she knew of, but had never met. She had spent the last seventy-five years as far away from them as possible because of their negativity towards her choices in life, and their sudden need to celebrate said choices made her queasy.

There were two parchments left on her desk. The wax seal on both had been the same. The first had been the expected congratulations for her birthday, but the second had been a surprise. She placed the first into a draw and broke the seal on the second, having left it for last. As she read through it, she felt her eyes widen and her heart pound through her ears. She had to read it all again a couple of times, unwilling to believe her eyes each time.

She had to speak to Sylvanas.

She rolled the parchment back up and, with it still in her hand, she picked up the bin and made her way outside. She poured the ashes onto an unlit campfire, and washed the bin out with water before leaving it to dry in the late-afternoon sun.

Alyna walked through a couple of open communal areas before walking up a specific path. Sylvanas' company was based at Farstrider Enclave, on the southern shore of Lake Elrendar. Most of the company were out on their various missions, and a couple of units were off on vacation. Alyna's company was on barracks duty this week, which essentially meant they were on guard duty for the enclave. They shared the duty with another unit, and it generally meant that for one week in every six they got to stay at home and sleep in beds.

And she got to spend time with Sylvanas.

The cabin at the top of the path belonged to Sylvanas as the captain of the company. While it was primarily used as her office, it also held a private area where she slept. Alyna smiled as she thought of the nights she had spent there with her captain. She had become very familiar with Sylvanas' private quarters over the last six decades. Despite that, she was not sure how Sylvanas perceived their relationship. She had made it pretty clear at the start that it was intended to be a casual affair, but Alyna had not been able to keep from falling for the woman. Sylvanas was aware of Alyna's feelings, she knew, but the captain had skilfully avoided any in-depth conversation on the subject. The quel'dorei were known for taking their time over relationships but Sylvanas took that skill to a whole new level.

Alyna looked at the scroll in her hand. That was about to change. Sylvanas had some questions to answer. She knocked on the door of the sizable cabin, and entered when she was beckoned.

Even when just doing paperwork, Sylvanas looked immaculate. Alyna knew the captain went to great lengths to look her best every day, and her golden hair had been put into two large braids today. Not a hair was out of place as her grey-blue eyes flicked up to confirm who had entered. After a brief nod of acknowledgement, the bright eyes quickly refocused on a parchment she had been reading.

Not one for sitting patiently, Alyna paced slowly before her officer and lover. She frowned at the term that had popped into her head. Were they really lovers? Did both partners need to actually love each other to be lovers, or were they just two people who had sex when it suited them? Sylvanas was used to Alyna's inability to sit still and she ignored her as she paced and debated with herself. There was no carpet on the wood floorboards, considering most of those entering the door would be muddy rangers. As her impatience got the better of her, Alyna began to drag her normally silent feet.

Without looking up, Sylvanas dryly stated, "I'm going to take a wild stab in the dark and guess there's something on your mind you know I'm not going to like."

Alyna stopped pacing and held out the parchment she was holding. "You could say that."

Sylvanas put down what she was reading and looked up at Alyna's offering. She took it tentatively, holding it away from her body as she asked, "What's this?"

"It's from your mother."

"My mother?" Sylvanas repeated back in surprise. She blinked at Alyna before eventually pointing at the chair on the other side of the desk. "For Sunwell's sake sit down before I hurt my neck looking up at you. What has my mother said to bring you here, other than happy birthday?"

Alyna obeyed reluctantly, almost immediately fidgeting with an arrowhead Sylvanas kept on her desk. "She wishes you well, at least she does in the other letter."

"Other letter?"

"Other letter. The one regarding my birthday. This one … is about you."

Sylvanas immediately looked at the parchment like it was about to melt her hand off, and Alyna understood the reaction. Quel'dorei liked following their various traditions and social nuances, hence why Alyna had been practically buried alive in birthday greetings from people she barely knew. They weren't sent because they liked her or wished her well. They had been sent as a matter of social and political protocol, even despite the fact she was the rogue child of her family. While Sylvanas' family were not as dogged in following these traditions as Alyna's, her mother sending a personal letter to Alyna was a big deal, and could mean any number of things. Any number of highly personal things that Sylvanas did not like to deal with.

"My mother sent you a letter … about me?" she asked quietly.

"Yes." Alyna gestured for Sylvanas to read the parchment, because she knew she would not be able to summarise it without the captain interrupting.

Sylvanas unravelled the parchment and began to read, her eyes widening in shock as she absorbed her mother's words. Eventually she slammed the letter down onto the table and pushed her chair back, unable to remain seated. For her part, Alyna stayed where she'd been told to sit, not wanting to ignite the short fuse Sylvanas was currently imitating.

"How dare she bring you into this!" she growled angrily. "This is absolutely none of your business!"

"Oh?" replied Alyna calmly, though she was certainly not feeling it. "You don't think I should know she is trying to find a suitor for you?"

Sylvanas had her arms folded across her chest as she not-so-quietly seethed. "We both know my mother needs no-one's permission to find her daughter a husband, Alyna."

"That was not what I asked, and you know it," she shot back.

Sylvanas' eyes narrowed slightly. "It's a private matter." She gestured offhandedly, "Besides, I'm far too career-focused to make a decision. She's been recently hounding me about it."

Alyna remained quiet, unable to respond. As the silence stretched between them, Sylvanas eventually sat back down and picked up the letter again. She sighed deeply before putting it back on the desk, unsure what to do with it.

Eventually, Alyna spoke her mind, her voice remaining soft but full of emotion. "Your mother is asking me to help convince you to at least talk to one of the men she has lined up for you." She shook her head in disbelief. "She knows what you and I get up to, Sylvanas. But, she thinks nothing of it, does she? She thinks we're friends with benefits." Sylvanas flinched subtly at the label, but Alyna caught it and it prompted her to ask, "Is that what you think?"

Sylvanas waved her off, but Alyna could tell the gesture was half-hearted. Or at least she hoped it was. "It's not that simple, and you know it."

"Do I?" Alyna moved forward in her chair to place her elbows on the desk as she leant in. "You know how I feel about you, Sylvanas. In sixty-six years you have skilfully avoided any talk about how you feel about me. How do I know anything at all when you refuse to talk about us?"

Sylvanas shook her head as she pleaded, "Don't do this, Alyna. Not now."

Alyna stood up and leant fully on the desk as she heard her voice rise in volume. "Why not now? Because it looks like you're going to be selected to be the new Ranger General?" Alyna gave Sylvanas a look of disgust. "I suppose we can't have the new female Ranger General having a girlfriend, can we?" She pushed her chair back some more and stepped away from the desk. She paused a moment to glare at her superior before she turned to walk back to the door.

"Where are you going?" asked Sylvanas, tentatively.

"To write my formal request for a transfer out of your company."

Alyna could hear a chair scraping behind her as the other woman stood up again. What she wasn't prepared for was the sheer panic evident in Sylvanas' voice. "What? Why would you do such a thing?"

With her hand on the handle, Alyna stopped. All she could momentarily feel was her heart pounding in her chest. It was the most real emotion she had heard from Sylvanas in a long time, if ever. She turned slowly, tears in her eyes. "Because I deserve a chance to find someone to be happy with, and that is clearly not here with you." She shook her head slowly. "You've made it abundantly clear that all I've done is share your bed, and nothing else." Alyna swallowed hard against the sob that had threatened to overwhelm her as she spoke her words. "I'm not even worth notifying that you could be marrying soon. I … I need space from you to … move on."

For a brief moment, Sylvanas' face hardened. "And if I deny your request?"

Alyna gawked at the spiteful response. "Is that a path you really want to go down?"

Sylvanas' shoulders relaxed visibly as she caved in. Her reply was quiet and sullen. "What I want is for you not to leave me."

The half-laugh that escaped Alyna's lips surprised even her with how bitter it sounded. "Why? Why do you even want me to stay? Am I just that good in bed because, by the sun, Sylvanas, I haven't a goddamn clue why else you want me to stay!" She was pacing now, unable to keep still as her mind worked furiously on what to say next now their respective gloves were off.

"Your problem is you don't know what you want, Sylvanas. From your first step you've been told what you'll become, and you're almost there. No one has any doubt that it'll be your name the Council announces next month. You've got no problem with that because you enjoy what you do, and you're using it to avoid the other thing your family is telling you to do … to marry. If you want to focus so badly on your career, then go ahead. I'm just a distraction and someone to keep you warm on cold nights."

"You're not a distraction … at least not in any way I don't like to be distracted." Sylvanas smiled coyly.

Alyna tried to ignore her physical response to the infuriating woman. "I can't believe you're hitting on me when I'm breaking up with you. Hell, is that even possible if you don't consider us to even be a couple?"

Sylvanas' voice rose in volume to match Alyna's. "What do you want me to say, Alyna? That I love you? Fine! I love you! Now, can we please drop this?"

"You … love me?" Alyna stood stock still trying to figure out if she'd heard the three little words she had wanted to hear for so long.

Sylvanas threw her arms up in frustration. "Yes!"

Alyna covered her face briefly before running her fingers back through her chaotic hair. "It's not exactly how I imagined you saying that to me for the first time, but I suppose hoping you'd say it romantically was a bit too farfetched." Sylvanas blinked in surprise. Alyna held her hand up, "It's okay, I'm not expecting any kind of romance from you." She sighed her next words, "I know better than that."

Sylvanas clearly didn't know where to look. "Shit, I'm not good at this type of stuff."

"You won't get any argument from me on that."

Sylvanas stepped around her desk and approached Alyna. She held out her hands and Alyna allowed Sylvanas to take her hands into her own. "Please, don't leave," she said softly. She then bit her lip before continuing. "You're right – my life has been almost predetermined for as long as I can remember, and it's about to become even more complicated than it already is. But, if there is one complication that I want, and need, it's you." She raised Alyna's hands up to her lips. "I wish I could promise you everything I know you want, Alyna. I truly do ..." She closed her eyes, unable to continue with the sentence.

Alyna sighed. "I know. I know that one day we'll have to marry others, Sylvanas. But, what harm is there in accepting what we have, while we have it?" She pulled one of her hands free and cupped Sylvanas' cheek, smiling softly when she felt the other woman nuzzle into her palm. "I want to enjoy my freedom while I have it, and I want to enjoy it with the woman I love, which is you."

She felt a small tear on her hand as Sylvanas pretended not to notice her own crying. "What you want will make us going our separate ways an agony I don't know I can handle. Loving you fully, giving you everything that I am, and then leaving you, would devastate me … and you."

Alyna gently wiped the tears from Sylvanas' cheeks as she spoke. "Who says we have to do that though? There are plenty of elves attracted to the same gender who marry but keep their same-sex lovers. It's not in people's faces, but it's hardly unusual anymore."

"What do you mean?" Sylvanas sounded genuinely confused.

Alyna smiled tenderly. "And you still think I'm the naïve one? You clearly have no idea what happens amongst the nobility in Silvermoon. I'm pretty sure I've told you about this before."

Sylvanas raised her eyes to meet Alyna's dark blue ones. "Would that make you happy though?"

"Being yours makes me happy, Sylvanas. They can hang husbands off our arms but they'll never be able to take away how I feel about you. And, I hope, what you feel for me."

Sylvanas leant her forehead against Alyna's. She quietly whispered, "I don't deserve you."

Alyna smiled slowly. "No, you don't. But I look forward to you proving yourself worthy, my future General."

Their eyes met again and Alyna felt a familiar heat flash through her, making her shudder. No one but Sylvanas could do that to her, and it thrilled her that this was not the end of what they had, but perhaps a new beginning. She didn't think she could feel any better in that moment until Sylvanas pressed her lips against Alyna's sensitive ear.

In a low, husky voice, she whispered, "I love you."

Alyna wrapped a golden braid around her wrist before she grabbed the back of Sylvanas' neck as her knees went weak, her own lips grazing the other woman's ear.

"Bedroom, now," she rasped.

She felt the wet lips against her ear smile before strong arms lifted her up, and took her into the next room.