Alright, this is going to be a weird one… Maybe a couple of you have seen this story before? I'm pretty sure it was published before, but it appears to have been deleted now. If you haven't seen it before… well… it was an idea I had for a fanfiction, but I'm starting to think it was too good, because…
"Have you warmed up the room for me yet?" the handsome ruler of the Underworld questioned in his terrifyingly quiet but commanding voice as he entered the room, which happened to be his lair, far below the Underworld. Decorating was just one of his many amazing talents, and the appealing design of the room demonstrated this skill.
I hope you don't expect me to continue kissing your butt this whole time.
If Hades cared, he didn't express it. "Please, inform our loyal readers of what's going on."
Yeah, yeah, okay. The concept of this story is a tournament, hosted by the God of Death himself-
"Hold your applause."
They weren't going to applaud.
"Do you really want to mess with me?"
(coughs awkwardly) Aaaaaanyway, this tournament is hosted by Hades himself. (Don't think about the timeline too hard. Your questions are pointless and all that.) The competitors are different villains from throughout the Onceverse - fan favorites, fan least favorites, alive, dead, redeemed, you name it. To kick us off, we'll be hosting four one-versus-one Wild Card rounds to determine four of the entrants in our bracket. We'll be taking requests for the other competitors - characters who get a lot of votes are more likely to be included! So support your favorites and get them involved! …Okay, that's it, right?
"Here's a thought: tell them the eight Wild Card competitors."
Ohhh, right. The four Wild Card Rounds will be, in this order:
Medusa VS the Blind Witch at Downtown Storybrooke
Chernabog VS the Count of Monte Cristo at Hades' Lair
Gabriel VS Bo Peep at Camelot Castle
Prince James VS the Siren at Lake Nostos
Now are we done?
"What's going on here?"
Erm… shouldn't you know?
"I find it hard to believe you can't actually tell the difference between our voices," Hades muttered.
Hey, I'm trying to create drama! Leaving it anonymous. Building suspense. It's something writers do.
"Who are you talking to?" the mysterious voice, feminine with a charming English accent, questioned as a figure appeared in the doorway of the lair. Hades turned to see his true love, Zelena, standing impatiently and looking a bit concerned.
"That voice would be the - well, an - author," Hades explained. "I've recently… gained his assistance in planning a small tournament."
"Tournament?" Zelena questioned. "What kind of tournament?"
"Battle to the death and all that," was the nonchalant answer.
"Well, as romantic as that sounds," Zelena remarked sarcastically as she approached, "I have grown rather… fond of my sister and her allies. I just can't let you-"
Zelena's heroic speech was quickly interrupted as Hades raised his hand comfortingly. "Don't worry. None of the heroes will be harmed. This is a villain showdown."
"Oh. Well, in that case…" The witch paused and slowly crossed to an empty chair, taking a moment to recline before waving her hand over her lap to conjure a bowl of popcorn. Taking a kernel between her fingers, she smiled. "On with the show."
Oookay… Now that we have Zelena's approval, which I wasn't aware was necessary-
"If I may," Zelena interjected. "I'm guessing you're single?"
…Are you just going to make quips at me the whole time you're here?
"Is that going to be a problem?"
Absolutely not! Takes the weight of comic relief off my shoulders.
"Let's get on with it," Hades demanded. "Our competitors are waiting."
Yeah, yeah, I'm getting to it. The winner of the tournament will receive the Aegis, a shield forged by Hephaestus to protect its wielder from all forms of attack… which basically means the winner of this tournament is going to be unstoppable. But offering such a highly desired prize was the only way to convince anyone to participate.
"Is that our cue?" a high-pitched voice timidly asked as a figure stepped out of the shadows.
Hades groaned. "We've been over this."
"Right, right, of course. …Erm… over what exactly?"
You don't reveal yourself until after I say "Introducing our competitors!" and give a proper dramatic entrance for Medusa first. Then I'll give you one.
"But isn't that so cliché? What if we gave our own introductions?"
…Medusa can't talk.
"Ohhh, right. Continue."
Zelena shook her head. "The moment's gone, now. If you wanted a dramatic entrance, you've messed it up now."
"Oh," the voice said sheepishly. Both figures stepped out of the shadow, revealing the Blind Witch on the left and Medusa on the right.
Alright then. Guess I can throw away those introductions I worked all night on… H-Man, you want to take us to our battlefield?
"Don't call me H-Man."
Right, sorry.
Hades waved his hand in the air, filling his lair with a bright light. Mere seconds later, Medusa and the Blind Witch found themselves standing on opposite sides of main street in Storybrooke. The clock tower chimed eight o'clock as the sun began to set over the horizon. Far overhead, Hades and Zelena's chairs floated, giving them a view of the battle while also keeping them safe from any attacks that missed their marks.
Wait, where am I?
"You're a disembodied voice."
Oh, right.
…
…
…
"What are we waiting for now?" Zelena demandedd, finally breaking the silence.
"I thought someone would announce that the battle was beginning," the Blind Witch said.
Oh! I think that's my job.
Hades scowled. "It is."
Sorry. How do you want me to do this? A countdown? A bell? Drumroll?
"Just say go!"
Fine, fine. Go.
Almost before the last word could be said (or, rather, written), the Blind Witch and Medusa snapped into action. As the Gorgon circled the street carefully, eyeing her prey from a safe distance, the Blind Witch stood perfectly still.
So much for action.
"Shush."
Medusa edged closer to her opponent and let out a terrifying screech. As some of the residents of Storybrooke, who had gathered to watch the battle, winced from the noise, the Blind Witch still stood her ground, a psychotic smile spreading across her face.
"She's crazier than we thought," Zelena remarked.
Seeing that her target still didn't attempt to evade her, Medusa stopped moving and let her eyes scan the scene once more. Without warning, she shrieked once more before rushing towards the witch, her eyes glowing brightly. But despite the horrifying scene, the Blind Witch's only reaction was the mere statement of, "Perfect."
Finally, just as Medusa was near enough to almost reach out and touch the witch with her human-like arms, the witch shifted. It was a small movement - just a flick of the wrist that few of the spectators noticed. But it was enough to pull a butcher's knife through the window of Chop Shop and hurl it straight at the Gorgon's neck. However, when it hit, all it did was frighten Medusa out of her attack and cause her to flee. The knife lay broken in two at the Blind Witch's feet.
"That doesn't sound like a head falling to the ground," the witch remarked.
Right. You can't cut Medusa's head off.
"What?! But isn't that how-"
Yeah, yeah, legends, whatever. We went over this in Season 3, Episode 11. Basically, come up with something else.
"And I would suggest you do it quickly," Hades spoke as Medusa regained composure and screeched at the witch yet again, obviously angered.
"Okay. Okay. Think," the Blind Witch whispered to herself, gently tapping her chin with her finger thoughtfully as the Gorgon moved nearer, showing little awareness of how perilous the scenario was. "Snow White defeated this… thing. So what would Snow White do?" Before the Witch could continue this train of thought, Medusa's snake-like body wrapped around her ankles. She paused and tipped her head. "That can't be a good sign."
Medusa yanked the witch's feet out from under her, sending her head plummeting to the asphault with a thunk. The Gorgon screeched triumphantly and began dragging her prey nearer, the Blind Witch desperately attempting to grab onto anything to keep Medusa from succeeding in her efforts. However, these attempts were in vain, as she was soon laying on the ground, facing up at Medusa, whose eyes began glowing as moved her face closer, making eye contact with the witch.
However, nothing happened.
Wait, what? Why?
"Well, duh," Zelena responded as a surprised Medusa released the Blind Witch and once again began circling her. "She's the Blind Witch. You can't meet the gaze of something that can't gaze."
Yes, I know that. Again, I'm trying to create drama. Suspense. Surprise.
"Well, there is one question worth asking," the wicked witch noted. "Why did no-eyes over there still attempt to get away, knowing that Medusa's main attack couldn't harm her?"
The Blind Witch slowly rose to her feet, listening closely to try to find her opponent's location. "Well, I thought she would try something more clever. Like perhaps-" Before the witch could list an example, she was silenced as Medusa's snake-like body wrapped around her neck and slowly began to tighten, leaving her with little ability to breathe. "-this," the witch finished, the word barely audible.
"Well, this is an interesting turn of events," Hades smirked.
The Blind Witch attempted to struggle against the Gorgon's grasp, only to realize that this was just speeding up the process. "I… just have to… knock her away," the witch muttered, trying desperately to force some breath through as she attempted to focus hard enough to use her telekinesis.
I wouldn't do that if I were you.
"Hm? Why not?" Zelena questioned.
Easy. If she uses her telekinesis to push Medusa back, assuming she's considering using the same power as she did in "Firebird" when she knocked the heroes into the Underbrooke library, Medusa's torso won't uncoil. So she'll end up being dragged forward too, but by the throat. Sounds painful.
Though she was now completely unable to breathe, much less voice a response, the Blind Witch's face scrunched as she considered this warning. She instead began to use her other senses to locate a nearby stone, quickly lifting it with telekinesis and hurling it at the Gorgon's head. Medusa shrieked as she pulled back, releasing the witch from her grasp. The Blind Witch fell to her knees and desperately took in as much air as possible.
"And why exactly did that work?" Hades asked.
Easy. The rock hitting Medusa didn't actually knock her backwards. She only moved away because she was frightened by the sudden impact, just like when the knife hit her or when Snow hit her with the sword. Because she was moving on her own volition, she had to unwrap herself from around the witch, leaving her mostly undamaged. Maybe some carpet-burn. …Or I guess scale-burn.
"I think we may have underestimated this candy-crunching creep," Zelena said, glancing at Hades as his fingernails dug into his armrests.
The Blind Witch had, by this time, returned to her feet and begun rethinking her plan, though she was rapidly running out of time as Medusa did the same. "Maybe if I could find something reflective, she'll end up turning herself to stone."
By Jove, I think she's got it.
"Really? That's the saying you decided to use in this scenario?" Hades asked, insulted.
Sorry.
The Blind Witch continued on this train of thought, locating all nearby metallic objects and pulling them to herself. She quickly kneeled down, uncomfortably aware of how close Medusa was getting, and began to touch each of the objects. However, she soon stopped.
"What's her problem now?" Zelena asked.
"I don't know which ones are reflective!" the Blind Witch whined, panicking. A shriek from Medusa informed everyone nearby that the Gorgon was ready to make another strike, which only worried the witch more.
"I suggest you figure it out fast," Hades said, a small smirk on his face.
The Blind Witch desperately attempted to find some slight difference in each of the objects that would reveal them as reflective. However, Medusa was faster and the Witch soon found herself struggling to breathe once again as the Gorgon's torso wrapped around her neck and pulled her to her feet.
She took that long to plan… just to do the exact same thing again?
The Blind Witch desperately gasped for breath. With no better option, she lifted a random object in front of her face: a spoon. As soon as Medusa's eyes met her reflection's, she turned to stone.
"P-Perfect," the Witch said with a hint of a smirk. Although Medusa had turned to stone, she was still wrapped tightly enough around the Blind Witch's throat that she could not breathe. "I win…"
Hades lowered his chair to the ground nearby the Witch. "Well… not quite."
"What?" Zelena and the Blind Witch said in sync.
Yeah, you see, you aren't declared victorious until your opponent is killed. Medusa, while turned to stone, is still very much alive. If she wasn't, then Prince Charming would be dead too, right?
"No… that's not…"
"You signed up for a battle to the death, didn't you?" Hades questioned with a slight smile. "What did you expect?"
And it's not long before your body will begin shutting down to try to preserve oxygen, since that stone continues to keep you from breathing. Which means you have about that much time to figure out how to kill a stone statue with the little amount of movement you have the strength remaining to complete.
"That's brilliant," Zelena remarked, lowering herself to the ground next to Hades.
"Did you expect any less?" Hades asked with a wink.
Gross.
"I… won't… accept… defeat!" the Blind Witch yelled, desperately wriggling around to escape the Gorgon's grip.
"You're just speeding up your own demise. I suggest you-" The sound of a loud crack cut Hades off, followed by a thump. "Impossible."
…No, I guess it's technically not. Medusa's tail gets thinner towards the tip. It's not surprising that it wouldn't take much force to break through that much stone. And I'm sure your mocking gave the Blind Witch a second wind in order to prove you-
"We get it."
"And now…" the Blind Witch said, staring at Hades intently as she rose to her feet, "…you will see a true victory." She raised her hand into the air, using her telekinesis to lift Medusa's stone form into the air.
"You wouldn't dare," Hades scowled.
"Try me," the Blind Witch responded, smirking proudly. With a flick of the wrist, Medusa was dropped, plummeting back to the asphault and landing in a million shattered pieces.
Yeah, Hades, you're going to be hard-pressed to prove Medusa's still alive. Especially since we've seen that kill Helga in-
"Fine," Hades sighed, turning his back to the Blind Witch. "We have our victor." The Blind Witch smiled as the spectators, excluding Zelena, cheered. "Wrap this up," Hades said, looking ever so slightly up to direct his statement towards the author.
Right, uh… Please leave a review if you enjoyed this story! Don't forget to vote for your favorite villains to increase their chances of being included. Round two, Chernabog VS the Count of Monte Cristo, will be released shortly! And check out my other stories - I only have one other Once story, but if you're interested in Nintendo games or Disney Channel shows, I've got stories for you! Thanks for reading!