My first Kenny x Butters fic! I love the ship name, 'Bunny'. That alone made me want to write this. Enjoy. :)
God fucking damnit.
Why the hell is it now, in my senior year of high school, that my brain is fucking me over?
"Kenny, did you hear me?" Jenny asked curiously, pulling on the sleeve of my dark blue shirt.
Kenny and Jenny. Yeah, it's decently stupid when you say our names together. Cartman got a laugh out of it when we first started dating.
"Sorry babe, what were you saying?" I asked half heartedly, letting my eyes drift back to the person who had captivated me as of late.
Leopold Butters Stotch. He's a few lunch tables away from where I sat with Jenny. Whenever Jenny insisted we sit alone together at lunch he'd take my place at my usual lunch table.
I watched Cartman say some stupid joke, making Butters turn angrily and glare at him. Stan laughed while Kyle mimicked Butter's reaction.
Butters was no longer the gullible kid he used to be when we were in elementary school. The transition to highschool made him grow up a lot. Cartman couldn't trick him into his schemes, much to my relief.
I had never liked seeing Butters follow Eric's every order, but I always felt powerless to stop it. When Eric set his mind on doing something he was nearly impossible to stop.
Butters had kept his signature hairstyle, shaving down the sides of his heads and neatly styling the bleach blonde puff of hair.
He had left the spikes behind in elementary school, nowadays he either swept it to the side or styled it upwards.
When he swept it to the side the strands would curl over, almost touching his eye. When it was up his hair waved neatly on his head until it spiked up softly in the front.
It's curled over today, my personal favorite.
Why the hell did I even pay attention to his hair, or care how it was styled today?
I watched Butter's laugh loudly, a wide smile spreading across his face. His light blue eyes lit up perfectly.
God, he looked so fucking cute.
I sighed loudly, slamming my head down on the table and grabbing at my hair frustratedly.
What the fuck was wrong with me.
"Kenny? Are you okay?" Jenny asked, sounding alarmed.
No, Jenny, I am not okay.
"Yeah, I'm great." I said sarcastically, raising my head and glaring at Jenny.
She's a pretty girl. Big brown eyes and long, black hair held back by a blue headband. We've been dating for about 3 months now.
If I'm honest, I'm not dating her with any long term goals in mind. I just liked sex.
Jenny knows that and she accepts it. We have a type of mutual understanding.
"Holy hell Ken. What crawled up your ass." She asked grumpily, crossing her arms at me and furrowing her eyebrows.
"I'm sorry Jen, it's not your fault. Don't worry about it." I said, trying to defuse the situation. A mad Jenny meant a lot of shit for me.
"Whatever. I'm sitting with the other girls, you do what you want." Jenny said shortly, taking her lunch and walking to the girl's table.
I groaned loudly as I watched her long hair swishing sassily behind her.
Wouldn't be getting any sex from her for next few days, which was unfortunate because that's the only way I could stop thinking of him.
I am not gay, I refuse to believe I'm gay. I don't think there's anything wrong with it, it's just not me.
I've loved girls and only girls for as long as I could remember.
I recalled stealing playboys from Clyde in the 5th grade. He had stolen them from an older cousin to show all the guys and was supposed to return them the next day.
His cousin beat the absolute shit out of him for losing them. I never owned up and they became my prized but secret possession for years.
The use I got out of those was phenomenal.
Even before that I would do my very best to look at naked girls, whether it be in magazines or online.
I fucking love girls. So why the hell am I thinking Butters Stotch is cute?
I had to admit I'd always been more conscious of Butters than any of the other guys. He was more delicate in a way. It made me want to be nicer to him.
It was only recently that Butters had been on my mind way too much. Nothing really triggered it. He had been hanging out with us more, and I guess me feeling like this is a result of that.
Right, McCormick. That's all it is. He's around you more than usual is all. And he might be a little bit cute, but that's besides the point.
You're. Not. Gay. You've never been attracted to another guy in your entire life. Just calm the fuck down.
"What happened Dude?" Kyle's voice interrupted my thoughts.
Ah, think of the devil.
All four guys had come over from their table. Cartman is probably looking to antagonize me about fighting with Jenny.
"Nothing." I said shortly. Kyle, Stan, and Cartman all sat on the other side of the table while Butters plopped down beside me.
That's another aspect of this that made this entire situation worse. Butters highly favored me out of all of the other guys. He would sit near me and talk to me the most. Didn't exactly help get him off my mind.
"You okay Ken?" Butters asked softly, looking at me with his light blue eyes.
I tried my best not to analyze his features too much while I replied.
"I'm okay." I said, smiling at him.
"Good!" Butters replied happily, smiling widely and patting my arm.
His hand is so small. I wanted to reach out and put it against mine to see the difference in size.
Butters is a good amount shorter than me, probably about half a foot. I enjoyed being taller than him.
"Not good Butters. Now Jenny isn't gonna put out for a good week." Cartman said, smirking evilly at me.
He enjoyed watching people suffer, no matter who it is.
"Well Eric, relationships aren't all about sex." Butters said matter of factly.
"With Kenny they are." Stan chimed in.
"Yeah. He's the resident heartbreaker." Kyle said, smiling at me in an annoying way.
"Shut up all three of you." I said grumpily, not wanting them to repeat what we all already knew.
"You're only ever nice to Butters. What are you, gay?" Cartman joked in an accusing way.
"I'm not in the mood fatass." I snapped, glowering at him.
Kyle and Stan both looked surprised. Normally I didn't let Eric get to me.
"Woah woah, calm down Kenny." Kyle said, putting his hands up and shaking them slightly.
"Eric you should leave him alone, he already fought with his girlfriend." Butters said defensively.
"They're totally gay for each other." Cartman said to Stan and Kyle.
"Dude, even if they were who cares." Stan said, clearly getting annoyed that Eric wasn't letting it go.
"Literally everyone would care. The whole school would be mind blown if Kenny McCormick was gay." Eric snickered, obviously thinking he's really funny.
I stood up abruptly, walking away from the table as fast as I could.
Everyone protested, but I didn't stop or look back. I couldn't handle Cartman's bullshit right now.
Before I could get very far down the hallway a hand grabbed my shoulder. I sighed loudly, turning around to see who had caught me.
"Cartman's an asshole. We all know it. Don't listen to him dude, once you let him get to you it's all over." Kyle said, looking at me seriously.
"I know Kyle. It just sucks hearing his crap after Jenny already got pissed at me." I said, sighing loudly.
"I get it, trust me I do. But we all know you're not gay, he knows it too. He's being like this because he saw it bothered you."
Hearing Kyle saying I wasn't gay took a load off of my shoulders. That's right, no one thought different about me. Not even that stupid fatass.
"You're right, thanks man." I smiled, clapping Kyle on the shoulder.
"Yeah. Now make up with Jenny and let's have a kick ass party tonight, alright?" Kyle sounded excited.
Bebe is holding a massive 'start of senior year' party at her place tonight. She gave the entire school an open invitation to come. Her house could easily handle it, her parents were filthy rich.
"Hell yeah." I agreed enthusiastically.
The bell blared loudly, filling the halls with its aggravating sound.
"I'll see you around." I said to Kyle, walking towards my locker.
"Bye dude." Kyle called out, walking in the opposite direction.
Next block is chemistry. Sometimes our teacher's lazy on Fridays and gives us 'work blocks', which meant we could do whatever the fuck we wanted until the bell rang.
I prayed for that to happen as I pulled my locker open, grabbing the necessary binder and heading off in the direction of the chem room.
"Kenny!" A voice said from behind me. I stopped in my tracks.
An effortless smile made its way onto my mouth as I turned to greet the person running up to me.
"Hey Leo." I usually only called Butters that when we were alone. It's a habit I started a week ago after school started this year. Now it's the end of the third week of senior year.
That's around when this whole shit show in my head started. Eric's sudden whim to include Butters in our group this year is causing more problems than he could ever imagine.
"I bet you're hoping Mrs. Banuelos gives us a work block." Butters said, looking up at me expectantly.
"You got it." I nodded, entertained that he knew me so well after only three weeks of hanging out together.
"U-um, about lunch…" Butters trailed off quietly, not knowing how to finish his sentence.
"Don't worry about it Butters. I was upset about fighting with Jenny. I'll catch up to her later and make up." I said, watching the stress and worry melt off of his face.
"That's great! I'm happy you're feeling better." Butters said, eyes lighting up earnestly.
I had never met anyone who wore their heart on their sleeve so unconditionally. Butters always meant what he said, and most of the time he only said nice things.
It's so refreshing to be around someone like him.
"Thanks." I gave him a small smile before we entered Mrs. Banuelos classroom.
Butters and I usually sat beside each other at the back right of the classroom. We normally had no chances to talk due to Mrs. Banuelos taking herself way too seriously and teaching us strictly for the entire 60 minute class.
From the moment we entered the room we couldn't speak. If we dared talk without her permission we'd be sent to the office.
Butters and I took our seats. He smiled kindly at me and I returned his gesture.
Had he always had such long eyelashes?
I pulled myself away from the thought. Instead I turned my attention to our teacher. The final bell had rung, she'd start droning on any minute now.
I watched her push her long, brown hair behind her ears. She looked at the class through her black rimmed glasses, almond shaped eyes judging our behaviour.
It's unfortunate really. She's not bad to look at, but her personality makes her completely intolerable.
"Alright class. It's a free block, I expect problems 1 to 25 to be done by Monday, so get started on those now." Mrs. Banuelos said, turning around and writing the assigned questions and what page they were on on the whiteboard behind her.
After that she sat down at her desk, typing away on her computer.
That's the signal everyone waits for. Once she's in that position we're golden.
The diligent students opened their textbooks, starting on the problems she had given us. Everyone else turned to their friends, chatting about unrelated things.
Butters immediately moved his desk to attach to mine. We did this every time she gave us a free block.
"Alright Kenny, let's start on these problems." Butters said seriously, turning the pages in his textbook until he reached the right one.
Butters is surprisingly smart. A perfect straight-A student. He diligently works on any assigned questions, the cute little teacher's pet.
"But it's Friday Butters." I complained. I layed down on my desk, turning my head to the side and laying it on my upper arm.
"That's no excuse to slack off. You'll just get lazy that way." Butters insisted, titling the blank page in his binder. He wrote down the date and then the number of the first question in the margin of his page.
I watched his pen strokes, enjoying the way he gracefully shaped his letters and numbers. His grip on the pen is very atypical. It's like his fingers barely hold onto it. The way he wields it is similar to how someone would use a paintbrush.
"What is it Kenny?" Butters curious voice snapped me out of my trance.
He looked down at his hands, wondering if there is something out of place that had been drawing my attention.
Damn it. Stuff like this was happening more and more lately. I would lose myself in watching whatever Butters was doing and he'd ask me what I was looking at.
"Nothing, just a little tired." That's my excuse every single time. Butters probably thinks I'm an insomniac at this point.
I sat up, raising my arms above my head and stretching up, cracking my shoulders and upper back.
"You should really get more sleep Kenny." Butters chastised me lightly, sounding more concerned than anything.
"Yeah, I know." I said quietly, opening up my chemistry textbook.
"Wow, you're giving in already?" Butter's voice is full of surprise.
Normally I would hound him non stop when he tried to make me work. It made for fun banter that I had come to love.
Today I didn't have it in me. I wanted to work and try to forget the flying storm of shit in my head.
"Yeah, I want to work. I'll need your help though." I smiled at Butters, trying to stop any negative emotions from showing through.
"Of course!" Butters said happily.
We read the first problem together. I didn't understand a damn word of it. Luckily for me, Butters knew exactly what to do.
I watched him show me step by step on his paper. After that it was my turn to attempt the problem.
I got about halfway through before I got stuck.
"I'm not sure what to do with this number." I said, staring down at my paper while I bit the end of my pen.
"Oh! That's easy." Butters leaned over, getting even closer to me.
I tensed up, watching him point to my paper and talk about what to do next.
I barely heard him. I focused on the movement of his eyelashes and lips. His light blue eyes were downcast, darting back and forth on my page.
His lips moved tantalizingly. He had a small mouth, but his lips were still full and pink.
I found myself wanting to lean closer to him. I needed to see more.
"Okay Kenny, now try." Butters leaned back into his own desk, seeming pleased with the explanation I didn't hear a single word of.
"Alright." I smiled lightly, watching Butters beginning to work on the second question.
I tapped my pen on the paper, deciding to write down some random calculations and just copy the answer Butters got.
I needed to get my shit together, and fast. If this… feeling kept running out of control I'm scared I'd do something I'd regret.