GOING THROUGH CHANGES

A/N: This is the conversation I like to imagine took place when we saw Randy speaking with Stan in his bedroom at the end of "You're Getting Old." It's nice to know I am not the only fan who feels deeply depressed by that episode and needs to write about it. Hope you like!

Late October 2011

It had been two days since Sharon and Randy had a major fight. But it wasn't like other times, if anything; it was more of an agreement of sorts once they both calmed down. The fact that they both knew how the other felt and they were on the same page made things run rather smoothly in the decisions that followed. And several decisions had been made between them in the short span of two days. But again, it felt right, and they knew it was for the best, so they didn't want to waste any time before getting things the way they should be. The only problem now was to tell the kids.

Sharon and Randy were downstairs talking. At that moment they felt they should get it over with. Randy sighed as he rubbed his eyes.

"How do we tell them?"

Sharon looked into her hands. "I'm not sure. There is no easy way to tell a child something like this. The only thing we can do is… explain everything honestly and calmly. And tell them that whatever happens, we both love them."

Randy nodded. "It must be the only way."

Sharon got to her feet. "I think I should talk to Shelley, and you Stanley. Maybe it would be better hearing it from your point of view rather than mine at first."

Randy got to his feet too and nodded again. "I'll explain things to him in a way he can understand."

Sharon looked at her soon-to-be-ex-husband with sad eyes. "Try to listen to him this time Randy, we both know how Stan is."

Randy nodded. "I'll do what I can to help him understand Sharon, I promise."

If only he had been this sincere in the past… together the parents walked upstairs and Sharon knocked on the door of their daughter's bedroom while Randy went over to their son's.

There was no answer from Stan so Randy carefully turned the doorknob and poked his head in. Stan was currently sitting on his bed, arms around his knees.

"All right if I come in and have a talk pal?" Randy asked.

Stan gripped his pants legs tighter. He swallowed and choked out, "'Kay."

Randy closed the door and looked around his son's bedroom. His usual mess of toys, books, and school supplies on his floor and shelves. It seemed like just yesterday he was diagnosed as a hoarder. Where had the time gone? He walked over to Stan and lightly touched his arm.

"Mom and I both want to talk to you but we feel it would be better if I got to you first," he began.

Again, Stan said a soft, "'Kay."

"Okay if I sit down?" he indicated Stan's bed. Stan nodded. Several minutes past without a word from either of them. Randy finally sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "You heard Mom and me yelling again two nights ago didn't you?"

Stan nodded. "Doesn't matter, I always do."

"Right, right." He sighed again. "First off, I want you to know that we won't be doing that much anymore. We… for once we're on the same page. Understand son?"

"I dunno. Is it a good page or bad?" Stan had to ask.

Randy rubbed his neck and again, sighed. "Stanley… I want you to know that no matter what, we both love you very much. There is nothing in the world your mother and I care more about than you and your sister."

Stan's stomach had gone stone cold. He had a feeling where his dad was going with this but couldn't stop it from happening. He just avoided his eyes as he spoke.

"Stan… son, you see, sometimes mommies and daddies stop getting along. Sometimes they stop caring about each other or stop supporting each other and of course, loving each other. All it takes sometimes is something small to make them both realize this isn't working out," Randy explained.

Stan sniffed but still did not look at him.

Randy had a hand on his back and continued. "When a husband and wife realize they don't want to be together anymore, they usually turn to divorce in order to bring peace of mind to them both."

Tears burned Stan's eyes but he willed himself not to let them fall yet.

Randy let out some air and gripped his son's shoulder. "I know you're a big boy now Stanley so I don't want to honey coat this. Son, your mother and I are getting a divorce."

Even if he knew it was coming it didn't make it any easier. Stan sniffed loudly before letting out a sob. Randy gently pushed Stan onto him and allowed him to cry. He stayed like this for a while as tears burned his own eyes. He hugged his son tight as he tried to find a voice.

"I know kiddo, I know. Nobody likes to hear this. I know… I'm so sorry son. Shhh… it's okay, it's going to be okay."

Stan clung onto his father's shirt as he stained it with tears. He knew it; he knew this was what his parents were dying to tell him. And now he heard it from his own dad's mouth. And he could barely comprehend it. After ten minutes of crying Stan looked up. He rubbed his dripping nose.

"B-but why Dad? Why? Why can't you and Mom w-work it out? (sniff) You have before. Tons of t-times. What makes this time any different?"

Randy looked down at Stan's red, wet face. "This was one time too many Stan. Like I said, it can be one little thing that sets it off. One little thing to change everyone."

Stan rubbed his nose and took himself off his dad. "It's all my fault. May-maybe if I just a-allowed Mom to take my CD away, maybe if I listened and didn't hide it behind her back. M-maybe then she wouldn't have had to prove to you it sucks and you wouldn't have had to prove to her it doesn't."

"What?" Randy gasped.

Stan blew his nose. "If I hadn't told you Mom took away the Gersploosh CD I got, you wouldn't have asked her why she did it. Then she wouldn't have showed you how shitty it is."

Randy shook his head. "Son, son… this isn't your fault. Nothing is. Divorce is never the child's fault. It's about a husband and wife not getting along and their problems. Okay? You're not at fault."

"But I don't get why you can't try again. I don't get why you can't just… go to marriage counseling or something. Why do you guys have to give up so easily?" Stan voiced.

"Your mom and I know what we want and don't want. We both know we can't possibly be together if we aren't happy. It's not that easy son."

"Yes! Yes it is Damnit!" Stan said angrily as tears filled his eyes again. "All it took last time was sex in my clubhouse. Why can't you do that again?"

Randy shook his head; his son had always been the one with the questions. Ever since he could talk he had to know the who, what, when, where, how, and why's of everything. And it was never an easy thing to explain these to him. Little satisfied Stan's thirst for the truth of something. He was such a demanding child when he wanted to be. And trust him to think there was still a shot to bring the peace in the household.

"Look son, Mom and I want different things okay? And we can't achieve them if we stay together. What would you rather have? The two of us together but unhappy? Or separated but happy?"

Stan rubbed his nose. "But I told you before Dad, when you married Mom you became family. And if I can't leave Shelley, you shouldn't be able to leave Mom."

Randy rolled his eyes. "Oohh, the innocence of children. Stanley, you can't leave your sister because you're related by blood. When you're related by blood with someone, whatever happens, they will always be a part of you. But if you marry into someone's family… well, what I mean is, moms and dads just have a certain privilege to leave each other because we aren't blood related. If we grow apart then there isn't anything between us that is keeping us together. Do you kind of understand?"

"Yes there is," Stan mumbled.

"Huh?"

"If you and Mom aren't together, there is something keeping you together. Us. Shelley and me. If I'm with Mom she's still a part of you because you're my father. So I have a part of you in me and she sees that whenever she looks at me. And when I'm with you, you'll see Mom in me because she's my mother and is a part of me. So you see her in me whenever you look at me," Stan stressed.

Randy sighed. "I see her in you already son. I always have."

Stan sighed and looked at his feet again.

"Your mother is tired of being with someone who 'doesn't act their age'," Randy said with air quotes. "She's been tired of my attitude and crazy ideas for a long time now."

"Then stop it," Stan glared.

"What?"

"Stop it! I agree Dad; you don't act your age! Maybe if you learn how to stop doing stupid things Mom will take you back! I've known for years that's why she gets angry with you! Me too!"

Randy looked a little shocked his son seemed to agree about his behavior. "But Stan, I can't just stop and change who I am. No one can. And sometimes people can never get used to it and they have to call it off. I know there are plenty of other women out there who would love to see me come up with a great idea or dream every week. Woman love that."

Stan looked down solemnly again and shuddered a deep breath. Randy sighed and rolled his eyes, knowing that wasn't the best thing to say.

"Stan, I want a woman who wants the same things as me. I need someone who will support me and the decisions I make. Your mother can't provide me with the support I need and I can't give her someone who can live a 'normal' life. It's that easy."

"No it's not," Stan sniffed. "Plenty of couples get in huge fights but get back together with marriage counseling. You and Mom are giving up too easily!"

Again, his son would not go down without a fight. Whether it was his child-like innocence that made him feel everything could go back to normal, or it was his stubborn personality, Stan did not want to hear anything negative from this conversation.

"You can't force Mom and I to love each other again Stanley. You tried it once before yeah, and it saved us another couple years, but there is too much tension between us that can't be fixed. It's not that we can't work together anymore but we don't love each other anymore."

Stan drew in a ragged breath. "But… but what does it mean? What does any of it mean? W-what's gonna happen?"

Randy took his arm off Stan now. "Well, we have a few things lined up. We're going to file for divorce tomorrow. And it's not going to take a day to get everything…settled. It will be a long and painful process before we are all in the place we want to be. But I promise you that you have nothing to fear. Everything is going to be okay. This is going to make Mommy and Daddy happy. This is a good thing for us."

Stan gripped his knees with his arms again. "If it's such a good thing why has Mom spent all day yesterday and today crying?" he placed his face in his legs as tears began to fall again.

Randy sighed. He didn't know he would be doing so much of it today. He returned his hand on his son's arm. "It's going to take time to get used to Stan. Mom is very happy but upset at the same time. Thinking about everything and all the changes that has to happen will take time to fully comprehend."

Stan looked up again and wiped his cheek. "M-Mom said changes are gonna happen over breakfast yesterday. What- what does she mean by that Dad?"

It was time to get everything out in the open now. He couldn't lie or sugar coat what Sharon and himself talked about and decided the past few days.

"Stanley… son, the truth is… I'm going to be moving out. Soon."

Stan looked down sadly. "I had a feeling you were gonna say that."

"I'm not sure where I'll go, but I'm going to start looking for an apartment somewhere as soon as I can. I might be staying with Uncle Jimbo until I find a place of my own."

Stan nodded, not wanting to look at him. But this wasn't the only thing; Randy was not finished with the bad news.

"Son, I feel I should tell you this too. Mom thinks it's best if… if she found a new place for herself as well."

Stan's head shot up at this now. "What? Where the hell am I gonna go then?"

"Your mother and I have decided to sell the house."

Stan's mouth slowly opened in utter shock. He shook his head just as slowly. "No. No."

Randy nodded solemnly. "I can't stay here by myself. I don't need all the space if Mom's going to be taking you kids. And she feels there are too many memories here that include me, she wouldn't want to continue to live here either."

"No! No! I don't wanna move from here Dad! No!" Stan cried. "I like it here! No! That's not fair!" he said, voice hardly audible through his tears.

"Stan"-

"No! Why? Why are you guys doing this to me? Why? I have enough to deal with by myself…" his whole face was dripping of tears and snot. He felt so confused and betrayed by this point.

Randy allowed Stan to let out his frustration onto him again. He felt his own heart ache terribly; he didn't want to do this. He never thought it would happen. He loved this house and he loved his life some five years ago, it was going fine. But to lay even more sadness onto his child was too much to bear. A tear rolled down his face.

"Shhh… it's okay Stan. It's okay. I'm sad too. I love this house. We've had so many happy memories here. I never thought I would ever leave it. W-When your mother and I first saw it some sixteen years ago; we knew it was the perfect place to call home."

Stan's cries softened as he hung onto his dad and listened to him speak, his strong arm around him.

"I lived in Colorado my whole life. Mom came here when she was your age. She spent the rest of her teenage years here and fell in love with the mountain life. After we got married we decided this would be the perfect place to raise a family. It's serene and beautiful and safe, with a lot of good people you can trust. And this house took out breath away."

Stan continued to hear Randy speak.

"Four bedrooms, three baths. A nice kitchen, a large yard for our future children to play in. It was where we brought Shelley home from the hospital after she was born. Then four years later, you kiddo. It's where you two took your first steps. Said your first words. Had all your birthdays. Had all your sleepovers. And made a lot of fun memories with your friends. Mom and I both thought we would grow old here while you and Shelley grew up and moved out from. We never thought we'd be leaving it…"

Stan sniffed. "I love this house Dad. I don't wanna move."

Randy continued to hold him.

"W-where is Mom going to move to?"

Randy sighed. "I don't know yet Stan. She'll tell you more when she gets the chance to talk with you."

"I don't want to live without you Dad. I'm gonna miss you…"

"Hey now, don't get too upset pal, I won't be too far. We don't have the custody battle figured out yet but I think we both decided it would be best if you and Shelley spent the majority of the time with Mom. But we can still see each other on the weekends. And I'm just going to be a phone-call or e-mail away if you ever need some manly advice like, your voice breaking or-your first pubic hair."

Stan couldn't help but giggle.

"And you'll have a great time with Mom. She argued with me how she takes care of all the cooking, cleaning, discipline, homework, doctor and dentist appointments with you kids anyway and her own needs. And she has a point… I can't do all of that son. Women are just better multi-taskers. It's better you lived with her," Randy explained.

Stan shrugged his shoulders. "Maybe."

"You and Mom are very similar Stan and are already close. She'll do everything in her power to give you a happy healthy life. I may not be with her anymore but I'm not going to put down her parenting abilities son. You have a very good mother who loves you very much. You will have a better time living in a new place with her rather than some bachelor pad with me," Randy said lightly.

Stan's breathing was still erratic as he tried to get his mind over everything he had just been told. He almost felt light-headed and dizzy.

"Are you okay there Stan?" Randy frowned.

"I- dunno."

"Need to take a puff from your inhaler?"

Stan shook his head no. "I just feel confused. I don't understand why any of this is happening or how it happened. It's too much for me to think about."

"I'm sorry son but this is what Mom and I think is for the best."

"Not just that. My life- it's so screwed up now. I don't know how to think. I just want to know why it has to be me. First my friends all leave me because I'm finding everything shitty, and now you and Mom. Why? Why me?"

Randy had no answer. He felt horrible for the poor boy but all he could do was give him a 'man hug' and pat his back. "I don't know why either son, but sometimes things change so suddenly, we can't do anything but go along for the ride. All you can do is try and be strong from now on okay?"

"Mom says to look at the positive stuff in any situation. It's so hard now that I think everything is crap," Stan moaned.

"Try though son, try. I know it will be hard but you have to try. I know you're a pretty emotional kid but you have to keep your eyes peeled at the good things okay? Do it for me, do it for yourself. You're only a kid; you have your whole life ahead of you."

Even if these words were true Stan still felt pity and dread. Randy soon sensed Stan didn't want to talk anymore and got up from his bed and told him he loved him before stepping out. Sharon didn't end up speaking with her son that night and it was for the best. Stan sat on his bed looking out the window, eyes glazed over as the hours passed. Finally, when it was past his bedtime did he peel his eyes from his window as a tear rolled down his cheek. He kicked off his shoes and put his face in his pillow, hoping he could slip into nothingness and leave the world behind. There was simply too much going on now and he was afraid he wouldn't be able to handle any of the changes the world was about to throw at him.

I hoped you enjoyed reading. This was something I just had to write. And it was nice to have a normal Randy for once, taking life seriously for once. Who agrees? I am planning on writing another one-shot that will cover Stan's first week living with Sharon in the new house as he tries to make sense of his new life. Thanks again for reading, please tell me what you thought. :-)

Lots of love: Rose June 11, 2011

A/N: It was expressed that Stan's cynicism might have made him numb more than anything of the news, but looking back at the end of 'You're Getting Old' when Randy is seen talking to him, Stan looked upset. Plus we see in 'Ass Burgers' some things Stan sees and hears are not shit. So I'd say he'd be sad during this moment.

Revised: December 21, 2018