Baby Ruth Day
It was a blistering hot August afternoon, and there was no logical way to beat the heat. The best idea was to jump into the refrigerator, but that can cause certain problems. I decided to take the matter into my own hands. I tied my towel around my neck, to block the sun from burning me. I also gave birth to SuperTodd.
1:30 pm came around, and it was time to let the swarms of kids into the pool. There were three buses outside the gate, frantically waiting to unload the rambunctious kids for a few hours. Another bus was pulling in, and there was a group walking. We could tell this was going to be a busy day.
This was going to be the last time many of us saw these kids, for the swimming season was close to ending for us. This would be the last time we got to play with them. Then the perfect idea stuck me. What better way to end the season, than with Baby Ruth Day '97. I talked it over with the other guards, and they all seemed to like the idea. The only question was who was going to perform the task? We all came to the agreement that I should. Aside from Baby Ruth Day '97 being my idea, I related the best with these kids. If I wasn't parading around as SuperTodd, you could always find me in the water with them while I was on my break.
We decided to buy our delectable little treat out of the vending machine from the pool's cash register. Once we had it in our hands, we had to somehow put the bar in the pool, and do so without being noticed. For that, we nominated James to jump in, and "swim some laps." He did that brilliantly and with.
We let the candy bar float around to see if anyone would notice it. Fifteen minutes later, it was discovered. There were only two steps in Baby Ruth Day. One was to get it in the water. The other was getting it out, but that is where the fun is.
I hung out in the back, preparing myself. I quickly became SuperTodd, but I was wearing more apparel this time. I had a bright orange snorkel, with a neon pink mask. I had swimming fins on, and I was carrying a tremendously large fishing net. At the same time, the pool was being evacuated. Who would want to swim in a "contaminated" pool?
I stepped out for the show of the summer. As I waddled around the pool, not a face wasn't laughing, which includes myself. I don't know how ducks do it, but I finally got to the site of the candy. At that point, I took my cape off, and gave it to the kid standing there, so it didn't get wet. I leaped into the water, and swam around a little bit. Although it was clearly right in front of me, I yelled "False alarm! You can get back in." Not a foot moved. One kid points at me, and said "what is that?" I shrieked in terror, and tried to get out as fast as I could. Again, waves of laughter rang throughout the pool. I slowly paced over to the floating log, and "unsuccessfully" tried to scope it up with the net. Next, I took the net off, and scooped it up without the long pole. Then I got out as fast as I could.
Still with my armor on, I waddled around the pool, showing everyone what I had captured. Many kids wondered what it was, and others thought they knew. Then, I stopped and stared at my net for about a minute. A hush came over the pool. I then yelled "It looks like poop." I showed it around a bit more, and stopped again. After sniffing it, I yelled "It smells like poop too."
By this time, half of the crowd was either laughing hysterically, or disgusted. I walked up to where a large crowd of the kids were standing. Reached in, and pulled out whatever it was in my net. Then I bit it. "Hey, it tastes like poop too." All the kids yelled "Ewww" in unison. "Wanna try some," I asked the group around me. None took the offer. I turned to James, who was right there, and asked him. He took a bite, and said "I think it needs more pepper."
For the rest of the day, kids kept coming up top me asking if it was really poop. I gave them a simple answer. I said "I'm SuperTodd. I have a very powerful digestive system." Either way you look at it, Baby Ruth Day '97 was a success. At that moment, I wasn't just a lifeguard wearing a towel anymore, but I had REALLY become SuperTodd, and became a hero to these kids.