Rating: PG-13
Fandom: Supernatural
Pairing: Sam Winchester x Ruby 2.0
Synopsis: He used her as much as she used him.
I hurt myself today to see if I still feel.
-Hurt by Nine Inch Nails
Ruby's a shivering mess, she feels empty, but it hurts. Like someone had stabbed her right in her heart, well her meatsuit's heart at least. But they hadn't. Of course they hadn't. Why would they have done that?
She doesn't want to feel. She wants to be numb. Desperately. She's used to that. She can deal with that. She can't even speak, not that she wants to, because her lips are cracked and her mouth dry. There's a shadow closing in on her. She feels fear for the first time in a very long time. She wishes she hadn't. How could she have been so stupid? This was like hell. Her own personal hell that she had created by herself, for herself. Even if it had been accidental.
She looks up at her attacker pleadingly through her blood stained eyelashes. His mouth twists into a grin before laughing cruelly, slashing her arms and legs with something that burns. Holy water.
He's bound her. Thick ropes carved with sigils bind her to something. She couldn't… she can't tell if it was a chair or a bed. She didn't care. She wanted to escape. She needs to escape. Too much like hell. Hates hell. She's just doing what she's told. She is just one of hell's soldiers, doing her job.
He puts a calloused finger to her face and licks at the blood. That's what this was all about? Her blood. But this wasn't her blood that was over her face. It was tears. She hadn't cried tears like a normal person would. She had cried blood. The shadow lingers over her, his hands pulling at her brown hair.
She hears something. It's the radio. He's left it on. A reedy voice floats through the room.
"What have I become? My sweetest friend?"
It's still playing.
Why won't it stop? She needs it to stop. She'd do anything. She feels the calloused hands on her body, teasing her. Mocking her stupidity, her innate naivety to believe that just because she wasn't human she couldn't be deceived. He whispers something into her ear and she thrashes. "Ruby~" It mocks and taunts. She feels human again. Is this what it was like to be human again? She couldn't quite remember.
But she isn't.
She'd forsaken the right to have emotions the moment she had started to practice witchcraft. When she'd lost her soul. Even if it had been an attempt to protect her family from the plague. Sweat clings to her forehead and she suddenly thinks that she's dying. But she isn't. She hasn't felt like this is far too long. It's almost foreign to her. This feeling. She can barely recognise it.
She's hurting.
She hates it. She hates him.
What had she created?
A monster.
A monster named Sam Winchester.
He used to be so good, so kind.
And she ruined that.
She was just doing her job.
She had to do her job.
The radio's still playing.
"Everyone I know goes away.
In the End.
You could have it all.
My Empire of Dirt.
I will let you down.
I will make you hurt."