By J.B.
A/N: Roy's my favorite character. Period. I can kill anyone, everyone, anything, everything in sight when I pick this guy. Seriously! People and things just -want- to run into his Flare Blade. ^_^ So I thought I'd try to imagine his own loneliness...besides, he's coupled with absolutely no one (no, I don't want to think of any slash between him and Marth X_x)...how would he be able to cope with that lack of ability to understand the people around him?
This songfic is written on a 1st-person perspective. The italic text not under single quotes are written words from Roy, not thoughts. "Rena" originates from one of the characters in the first Fire Emblem games, who was Marth's (named Marus in the games, 'Mars' in the anime) betrothed. (A 'betrothed' is someone that your parents/guardians assign you to marry. I don't like the idea much either...unless she's pretty. Well, maybe. ^^;;)
Even though I don't consider Hero (by Chad Kroeger) to be a depressing
song, can't hurt to try to make it one...
I am so high, I can hear heaven.
I am so high, I can hear heaven.
No heaven, no heaven don't hear me.
'D'ya know the times when you're just...tired and don't want to do or think of anything? When you just want to forget it all and just stay one with the silence and emptiness?'
"Hey Roy! Up for some practice over at Hyrule Castle?"
'Well, this is one of those times right now.'
I glanced over my shoulder to look at Marth, his grin infectious and with mirth. "Nah...I'll pass, Marth," I said casually.
"But why? You don't usually want to skip a fight..."
"I'm just tired, that's all," I said, waving off his concern. "Probably tomorrow, 'k?" I gave a fake smile, which seemed to oddly fit me despite that I never pretended to smile at all, then walked off before the blue-haired prince could debate about it any further.
I entered my private room, locked the door behind me, and pulled out
my journal from a hidden compartment under my bed. I always keep my -really-
personal stuff where it obviously can't be seen, as people always seemed
to shift around my room a lot, so I needed a way to keep my privacy. Taking
a pen from the nightstand and flicking on the lamp, I settled down on my
bed and began to write.
Dear Rena,
Odd that I still call you that, no? But it's pretty hard to forget about you...well, the one who I got your name from, I mean. But enough reminiscing. I've been in that 'thinking' mood as of late. I've been called many things and many names. I know how it is to be the killed and the killer. I've got both fame and infamy on my head.
Trouble is...is that all people look at me as?
And they say that a hero can save us.
Im not gonna stand here and wait.
I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles.
Watch as they all fly away.
I doubt that anyone will know me as anything else but Roy; the bandit; the knight living under my 'friend' Marth's shadow; the spikey redhead (and no, Bowser's hair is orange); that's all anyone and everyone wants to look at me as. Now, that's bad enough... But you know what I really don't like being called?
A hero.
Someone told me love will all save us.
But how can that be, look what love gave us.
A world full of killing, and blood-spilling
That world never came.
I'm anything -but- that. What makes me the 'heroic' type? The way that I slice through monsters like butter with my Flare Blade? The way I always appear at the right place at the right time to rescue the damsel in distress? Or the fact is every other girl I see looks at me as bishounen material? Not that I mind that... but those are all weak reasons to ever think of me as a hero.
Innocent, I ain't.
And they say that a hero can save us.
Im not gonna stand here and wait.
I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles.
Watch as they all fly away.
I'm not a hero. I've never been one, even though I would look like I'd fill that role. I'm just a swordsman who only knows how to fight, to kill, to steal, to survive. That's all I've based my life upon. That's all I've really needed. The world is but survival to me. It's always been that way in my world, always been the rule in THE world, period. Why can't others see that?
It's no different here, being a place of 'mock' war and peace.
Now that the world isnt ending, its love that I'm sending to you.
It isnt the love of a hero, and thats why I fear it wont do.
Heh... I'm not just your usual flamboyant redhead. I'm not that clueless. I may look like to be this leader that talks a lot of crap before battles and flirts with all the ladies, but if you ever stop to think, just once, of the -faint- possiblity that there might more to be than that? But no... none of you want to stretch it that far. Then again... it's not so bad making you all think that way. It's...comforting, in a way. It sometimes make me forget. Forget that I suffer because I'm really alone. Forget that there's no one that could and would really understand everything behind the fire.
It ain't today I'm forgetting.
And they say that a hero can save us.
Im not gonna stand here and wait.
I'll hold onto the wings of the eagles.
Watch as they all fly away.
There's nothing symbolic of knights these days. We're not as chivalrous as people think we are--well, maybe Marth is, but that's 'cause he's also a prince, and it'd be "un-princelike" to not act as the nice guy. But I'm pure warrior, no matter what anyone else says.
I sometimes envy people because of the unique reputations they've managed to maintain. Take Bowser, for example. He's always acted as the tough guy; not really the evil type, just that his beliefs don't exactly mix with that damned "leader" of ours, Mario. Speaking of him... as much as he even tries to be charismatic toward everyone (he does a better job of it than his brother, in my opinion), he's just got to learn when to just back off and leave people alone. The world doesn't revolve around him, and it'll be a cold day in hell before it ever is.
Falco hasn't changed much ever since he gained entry to the tournament either. He's still as brash and reckless as ever, and I'll admit, that sometimes helps during a match... the large amount of confidence, I mean. Of course that bluebird's good...then again, he hasn't ever met me in a match, now has he? I'm not trying to brag...it's just that he always tends to avoid my company every time I enter the same room as him.
Either I'm really that annoying, or he knows I'm the tougher guy.
And they're watching us, Watching us
They're watching us, Watching us
As they all fly away...
But really now... I'm not known much of anything to anyone, in retrospect. Well...other than the pretty minor things I said, I really don't have much of a reputation, now don't I? At least, not a really respected one. That what my real dream is. To find the one that does know what it's like to survive with little, isn't afraid of the bloodshed, and can help take me away from the people down on the ground. Like an angel, perhaps, or even an eagle. Anyone with wings would do.
Man, I envy the birds. They migrate around so much, all that's on their minds is the carefree feelings.
Well... be seeing you, Rena. Oh, one more thing? Don't ever let Marth see you, ok?
~ Roy
I flicked off the lamp, turning over on my bed, my face directed towards the open window.
'Someday,' I thought. 'Someday.'
A/N: Excuse the OOC-ness... @_@ I really need to try to find something about which Fire Emblem anime that Roy popped in. Maybe it'll give me better insight...