Title: Don't let anyone else see your tears but me, part 1

Characters/Pairings: Atobe Keigo/Shishido Ryou, Ohtori Choutarou/Shishido Ryou

Disclaimer: I do not own the characters of The Prince of Tennis but boy, I wish I did. Oh, the gayness.

Ohtori was out of breath because of all that running, staring blindly in front of him. He just couldn't accept this. He had just gotten a call from Atobe, Shishido was in hospital. Atobe hadn't told any details but he had sounded worried. Ohtori couldn't help but think that this was all his fault, he had turned Shishido down right before the accident. What if Shishido wouldn't make it? What if... What if he'd die because of what Ohtori did?

Ohtori's heart felt heavy in his chest. How could've he returned Shishido's feelings? His fingers wrapped around the little cross he was always carrying on his neck, it made him feel a lot safer. It was wrong, there was no way two boys could have a romantic relationship. There was something wrong with those boys who did, but Ohtori was sure he wasn't one of them.

He wasn't. He cared about Shishido of course, they were friends and doubles partners after all, but... He could never ever do such a thing, it was against his God's will. And what about his parents? They had often asked him what was going on between the two of them but Ohtori had just said that they were nothing but friends.

Ohtori hurried his steps.

He kept thinking about Shishido and the confession he had made. Ohtori remembered how his voice had been shaking when he let those words come out, I love you. He was sure Shishido had meant it because he never said anything unnecessary and... His senpai would never use those words lightly.

How would it feel like...? To have another guy pressed against your body?

Ohtori had always thought Shishido had such a nice body to be a boy, those beautiful sharp eyes that could fierce anyone, that long flowing dark hair... And not to mention his personality. Shishido might have been a little hard to deal with in the first place and everything but when you get to know him better you realize what a good person he actually is.

Ohtori owed him so much. What would he do if one of the most important people to him would be taken away from him like this? His eyes were filling up with tears, he couldn't control his emotions anymore.

Ohtori closed his eyes, took a deep breath before opening the hospital room's door. When he opened his eyes again, he saw Shishido laying on the bed unconscious and connected to lots of different wires. His face looked terrible because of all those bruises and blood that hadn't been washed off yet.

"Shishido-san," Ohtori whispered and took a step closer. He wiped the biggest blood off of his friends face and sighed. He sat down on the bed, brushing Shishido's hair. No matter how he tried to avoid it, Shishido looked even more beautiful than ever. His body was weak but there was still some strength in it, he was fighting for his life and he wouldn't give up.

Ohtori didn't understand what was going on in his head, but at this moment it wasn't important. He wanted Shishido to wake up, he wanted to hear his voice again. He ran his fingers across Shishido's chest, exploring his defenceless body. Would it really be that bad?

He wrapped his arms around Shishido's body, pressing his face against his chest. Tears fell down on his shirt. It didn't feel bad, to be honest. Ohtori closed his eyes. Had he been deceiving himself all this time? Had he been denying his true feelings for his best friend?

The door opened, making a screaking noice before someone stepped into the room.

"What are you doing, Ohtori?" asked a familiar voice coldly. It couldn't be...? Ohtori rose his flushed face and saw Atobe's eyes staring straight at him, like they could've seen through him. He stood up quickly and bowed, babbling about being sorry and that he'd be leaving now. Atobe rolled his eyes, was this guy an idiot?

He grabbed Ohtori's arm and told him to stop.

"I think there's something you should know," he said. "Shishido happens to be my boyfriend so don't you dare to lay a hand on him, okay? Or else..."

Ohtori couldn't believe his ears. Atobe and... Shishido? But hadn't Shishido just told him he was in love with him and...? What exactly was going on? Ohtori buried his face to his hands and tried to get his thoughts back together. Atobe folded his arms like he was waiting for him to leave and quick.

"A-Atobe-buchou, I think... I think that Shishido-senpai wanted to break up with you. Because... Just a few hours before the accident you told me about, he confessed to me. And I believe him. I... I also love him but I was never able to tell him about it... I... I didn't understand it myself."

Atobe rose his eyebrows and then bursted into laughter. He pointed at the door, waiting Ohtori to disappear from his eyesight. Ohtori lowered his head and dragged his feet to the door. He gave soundlessly sleeping Shishido one more look and then close the door behind him, leaving Atobe alone with him.

Somehow, he felt horrible. He felt like he was betraying himself and Shishido. What if his senpai had just said that as a joke and he had taken it for real? And now he had just made himself the biggest joke of Hyoutei, telling all that to Atobe. Ohtori shook his head, he was sure Shishido had meant it. He had looked so miserable when Ohtori had told him no. Ohtori remembered his eyes tearing up a little and the way he looked at him. How he had ran away after that.

Shishido-san...

He sighed, right now Atobe was probably sweet-talking to him, touching him like Ohtori never would be able to, kissing his amazingly pretty face. Suddenly, Ohtori felt really jealous. He couldn't understand Shishido, why would he go out with a person like their captain, Atobe? Ohtori bit his bottom lip, that cold, arrogant, self-centered, spoiled brat had touched his Shishido-senpai.

It was unbearable. Ohtori hadn't realized it before but come to think of it now, Shishido had been a little weird lately. After the confession Ohtori had of course thought it had something to do with it but now... He understood that Shishido had been struggling with his feelings and Atobe who had probably forced him to stay with him or something like that. It must had been hard on him, especially when you knew what Atobe could be like if he was attached to someone.

At the very same moment, an image of his senpai's crying face floated into his mind. Ohtori opened his eyes, it was wrong. Shishido didn't deserve to be treated like that, he deserved so much better. Just... Just if he could open his eyes, wake up from that dangerous dream.

Maybe Ohtori would then be able to answer his feelings.

To help him... To get away from Atobe.

A/N: Thank you for all the reviews and comments on my previous stories, I really appreciate them. Oh wow, I suck at writing summaries.