Christmas is coming!
Robert Chase peered into the crowded hospital chapel, resting his gaze on each smiling person in the pews. Biting his lip, he crept away, pulling his coat closer to his body as he made his way to his car.
"Rockin' around the Christmas tr-" Chase jumped as Christmas carols blasted through his speakers, as he twisted the key a bit harder than necessary. His foot hovered tentatively above the gas pedal, before he shook his head and pressed down. White knuckles gripped the steering wheel tightly, jaw set in a rigid line. How long had it been since he had stepped into a real church? How long had it been since he'd grown cold?
Pulling the car over to the side of the road, Chase gazed across the street to the magnificent structure before him. He climbed out from his car and made his way to the heavy wooden doors of the church, hands clenched. Pushing them open, he held his breath at the sight of hundreds of breathing candles, how they illuminated the figures set in colored glass.
"Joseph son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary home as your wife, because what is conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit..."
Chase's throat tightened at the sound of the familiar, traditional homily. Still today, he could recite the story of Jesus' birth perfectly, but it sounded to him like a distant memory, a voice calling from far away. It reminded him just how far from home he was.
"He will save his people from their sins."
Making his way to the confessional booth, Chase settled into its dark confines stiffly, awkward nostalgia settling into his stomach.
"Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned." He received a cough in reply. "I cannot bring myself to forgive." The coughing on the other side of the thin barrier stopped, and a low voice confronted the young doctor.
"That's quite a broad confession, Kid. Tell me more." The blonde furrowed his brow.
"I don't-"
"It's destroying you," the voice interrupted. "Tell me for your own sake." Chase's lips pressed together tightly as he struggled to find the right words, preparing to tell this stranger everything he had kept inside for years.
"I wouldn't know what to say," he sighed quietly.
"Everything which pains you." Chase let out a shuddering breath and pressed a cold hand to his forehead.
"I have grown resentful towards humanity."
He hadn't always been angry. He had celebrated the joy of God's creations, at one point in his life. But he had been naive and disgustingly unaware. Then, in a single night, his faith was torn away. He discovered man's flagrant and consistent evils, in a dark alley in December. Robert had been meandering through the silent city, admiring the few stars that glimmered through the thick layer of smog. Drunk on beauty and cold air, he hardly had time to react against the rough hand clapping over his mouth and the arm that wrapped around his waist. Robert possessed nothing of value, at the time. When his attacker realized this, he took the only thing he could: Robert's innocence, one of the final strands of sanity. Robert lay in the alley for hours to follow, dirty and bleeding. It pained him to move.
"I called for help, but nobody would help me. They merely walked faster." Where was his Good Samaritan? Had all his Lord's men turned from glory? From that night forward, Robert adopted the stoical mask of a liar to protect him from the evils of man and his intentions.
"I have become just as grotesque as them all." He told himself constantly that he didn't care anymore, not about his father's absence, the pain of loneliness, not even strains of poverty. Yes, Chase knew he was lying to himself; he wanted nothing more than to be comforted. Every forced, pathetic facial expression left him with the fear that one day, he would cease to be human completely. "I have become a wicked hypocrite."
"I want desperately to overcome the scars of man's flaws," Chase concluded his testimony, "but I can't bring myself to overcome this hatred."
"One step at a time, child, one person at a time. Let us forgive, together. Who do you feel you must forgive first?" Chase sat in silence for a moment, thinking. He might as well start with current events...
"My boss... He's a dogmatic narcissist who manipulates, cheats, lies... anything to have his way-" Suddenly, the screen drew back, and the deep voice's origin was irritatingly clear.
"Hey, I think those are my good qualities!" Chase leapt to his feet, his face burning red.
"House, what are you doing here?" he groaned through clenched teeth. House shrugged.
"I followed you." Chase shook his head angrily, and bursting from the booth, stormed silently through the wooden doors to his car.
"'Do not be afraid. I bring you good news of great joy that will be for all the people. Today in the town of David a Savior has been born to you.'"
"YOU FORGOT YOUR ASSLESS CHAPS!" House bellowed, everyone in the pews turning in curiosity and shock. Chuckling, he continued to pursue his subordinate, cane tapping curtly on the stone floor. Crossing the threshold and banging the doors closed behind him, he smacked Chase's hand away from the car door handle with his cane. "Hey, don't get your panties all up in a bunch. The assless chaps thing was just a joke!" The youth squeezed his eyes shut and exhaled, shaking.
"I hate you."
"What are you, a fucking teenager? As if telling me you hate me is going to do anything. What's your problem?"
"You're my problem!" Chase roared. "You have the ability to degrade everyone around you, but you only make me completely miserable!"
"Because you need it."
"What?" Chase spat. "You think I want this?" House rolled his eyes and reached into his pocket for his painkillers.
"I said you need it, not want it. You need reassurance of your own existence. I bet you became an intensivist for the need to be needed, to give yourself purpose and definition, didn't you? Most med students would prefer to work with patients who have better chances of survival, but you chose to stay with those who need companionship the most, where you can play the role of the good doctor. You try to overcome your guilt through justifying means. Don't think I can't see the pain you hold, no matter how well you think it's hidden; it's written on the lines of your face." Chase lifted his hand subconsciously to brush against the grooves set around his mouth from the cheek splitting grin everyone loved. House turned his head, clenching his jaw.
"But it's alright," he continued quietly. "You're not alone." House placed the unopened prescription bottle back into his pocket, glanced around, then began to limp away to the waiting Corvette.
Chase watched his employer's retreating back, scarcely daring to breathe. He was not alone? There was a pain in his chest, an aching twist, like alcohol on a wound. When it dissipated, Chase sucked in a deep breath at the feeling of catharsis.
"...House!" The figure paused and turned slightly. Chase felt foolish, but in a way he loved. "A-are you busy tonight?"
"Why, Dr. Chase, are you asking me out on a date?" the older doctor mocked, letting out a laugh at the deep red, visible even in the dim light, that tinged Robert's cheeks.
"N-no! It's just that it's Christmas and all and-"
"Shut up. Come to my place. Bring the beer, but none of that Australian crap." Robert watched the cherry red car screech away and truly smiled for the first time in years. His Good Samaritan had come, at long last.
"Happy birthday, Jesus."
"It's
nice to know I am not alone,
That
I will never be alone.
It's
nice to have found this House called 'home,'
Finally,
a place to call 'home.'"
Praise God, amen.
Christmas. Exciting. Awesome. Enjoy.
Happy birthday, Jesus!
