Oh, we go where nobody knows,
with guns hidden under our petticoats.
No we're never gunna' quit it, no we're never gunna' quit it no.
-Chocolate, by: The 1975
"Captain James Pleiades Hawkins," said the creeper alien with four eyes, "mos' cer'ainly 'as a ring 'o it'," he joked, laughing through his tentacle mustache that framed his snap jaw.
The creepy alien's laugh suddenly turned into a cough, most likely a cause of smoking too much pipe.
Jim's hand's were bound behind his back, his blindfold now stripped from his eyes, and he was shoved onto his knees next to his first mate, Mr. Nestor, a four legged alien from a planet somewhere in the Coral Galaxy. Mr. Nestor was a fine first mate and for the past four months on Jim's new ship, the K.H.M. Explorer, Jim enjoyed his sarcasm and uncanny ability to read certain situations.
To be honest, this wasn't the stickiest situation Jim had ever been in. He could recall at least one from his voyage to Treasure Planet, when he was not just yet sixteen, and he could even recall ten or more from his Academy days.
Jim got into the Interstellar Academy almost immediately after his expedition from Treasure Planet. The Academy was wary of taking in a known "felon" but, hey, they always enjoyed letting in a few strays for the main purpose of claiming to have "straightened them out". Not that Jim minded, he went above and beyond that school's expectations. He even graduated with top marks, and was immediately shipped off as a first mate for the distinguished Captain Rowa. Not only that, but Jim became so popular, he had received several letters from many naval captains requesting Jim specifically. By the time Jim was twenty two he had gone up in rank, and earned the title of Official Spacer by the navy.
Not that Jim was bragging or anything, but hey he was the youngest Captain in history to become a High ranking Naval Officer and an Official Spacer, and Jim took pride in that!
One might be wondering how Jim got into such a situation as this. Well it was rather simple really, word got out of the young Captain's achievements, and while on orders to patrol Cygnus Cross, he was ambushed by a brigade of pirates while docked at a port on some dusty old planet. As far as he knew, Jim's ship was perfectly fine, and so were his crew and cargo. In fact, Jim wouldn't be surprised if this ridiculous excuse of a Pirate didn't know what Ship actually belong to Jim.
The Pirate Captain's name was of little consequence to Jim, but listening to the stupid alien make bad jokes either about Jim's young age, brown hair, skin color, and uniform was getting tiring. Despite being pointed at by two guns, Jim couldn't care less what these pirates thought of him.
"Look," Jim interrupted the Pirate Captain's lame speech as he was getting in his face, "I could care less what you want from me and my ship," Jim began leaving the Pirate dumbfounded, "There aren't any goods on my ship besides food and water, all I'm doing is following orders, in which I must say I am doing a fabulous job."
"Captain..." Mr. Nestor whispered warningly.
"In other matters, you have only tied up myself and my first mate here, meaning that my crew are either on my ship, or are elsewhere that doesn't concern you," Jim went on, immensely enjoying the Pirate Captain calculate in his head what Jim was trying to get at. "Furthermore, you had seemingly ambushed me while taking a stroll through an unknown port, and it now seems that you have taken me somewhere of little consequence, except for the fact that I am no longer on land. Seeing as this room is shifting, I must be on a ship." Jim concluded, his speech seemingly going nowhere.
Jim turned to his first mate and said, "What do you think, Mr. Nestor, I do believe that we are on some sort of dingy, as these quarters are much too small to be a large pirate ship."
Mr. Nestor having decided that he would go along with his Captain's strange plan, looked around the wooden room that bobbed and creaked, "yes, Captain, it does seem rather small," he gave a look of disdain towards the walls as if his looks could wound the planks that made up the small room. "Much too small to be on a large ship," he added.
"Hmm yes," Jim concurred, looking around as well, "and by looking at the floor stains and shelves, I can also believe that this room was once a spice cabinet converted," he added with a smile, "So we must be at least right next to the kitchens, not very far from the deck either, if I presume."
"Ehhhh," the pirate captain slurred, "I don' see 'ow tha' got nothin' to do with yeh," he smirked cocking back his ray pistol, "yeh should be worryin' more 'bout yerselves," he finished with a smirk.
Jim ignored the pirate's lame and unoriginal threat, and continued on with whatever he was saying.
"It also seems that this air is rather different from the air back at the port. That air was dry and dusty, but this air seems rather moist and wet," he concluded looking around, "seeing as we have only just been tied up and brought here none but ten to twenty minutes ago, I think we're on that tiny moon right next to our dusty old planet don't you think, Mr. Nestor?"
"Ah yes, I do remember reading in our log that our planet got most of it's water from their moon, odd enough as that is," Mr. Nestor agreed.
Jim then twisted around to look behind him, "Oh yes, and it seems you have left the door open, I can see straight into the mess hall and up those stairs onto the deck," he then turned around towards the sorry excuse of a Captain, who began glowering at Jim as if he were the scum under his boot.
"Alrigh', alrigh', I get it," the Pirate slurred, "yeh arr a smart youn' lad 'oo became cap'n an' won 'im a ship an crew. Bu' all those fancy words yeh got thar do nothin' fer yeh predicament."
"Ooh! Did you hear that, Mr. Nestor! He knows some big words as well!" Jim sarcastically yelled.
"Why yeh littl' brat!" the Pirate Captain meant to lunge at Jim, but before he could Jim smirked at him and said, "yeh migh' wan' ter lerk at yer deck, mate," mocking the pirate's accent.
The Pirate Captain looked at the young man before motioning the two large pirates, who were holding guns at Jim and Mr. Nestor, to go look up at their little ships deck. After watching the two beefy pirates waddle through the mess hall and up the staircase, the Pirate Captain stared blankly at Jim and his first mate.
After a few minutes of nothing, Jim watched in amusement as the pathetic excuse for a pirate captain's face began to turn red in anger, "Wat is takin' ye' so long!" he shouted out, waiting for a reply that never came. There was only silence coming from up the stairs.
The pathetic Pirate Captain grumbled to himself, putting his ray pistol down on his small desk, and stomping out over to the main deck.
He climbed up the last few stairs shouting, "Wat arr ye' scalliwags doin' up 'ere? 'avin' a tea parrty?"
But when he looked around the deck, he did not see what he thought he would. His crew weren't even drinking tea, nor were the laying around as usual like their captain thought they would. No, instead he found them bound in a line across the deck, even the two big brutes he ordered on deck just minutes before were there. All staring up at him with large eyes.
"I suggest, you might want to surrender yourself, Cap'n," the Pirate Captain spun around to find Jim Hawkins and Mr. Nestor on the top stairs that led down to the kitchens. Both unbound and pointing their ray pistols, of a much higher caliber, right at the ridiculous Pirate Captain.
Behind Captain James P Hawkins and his first mate, were Jim's entire crew each with their own weapons, and an incredibly large Naval Ship that loomed over the tiny pirate dingy.
Jim smirked at the Pirate Captain, "well then, Good thing my name has a certain ring to it, as it's nice and easy for you to remember me by."
The pirate then flushed in shame as he was stripped of his possessions and bound, "Well we have completed our mission! Let's jail these pirates, and get outta here!" James yelled out to his crew, which then began to cheer.
A/N: Just a nice one-shot about what our James Hawkins has been up to! hahaha
I was inspired to write this fanfic from the song I was listening to by: The 1975
Oh yeah and the K.H.M. of Jim's ship are actually my initials XD
I had been meaning to write a short TP fanfic :P I got really into reading all the different stories and felt that perhaps I should contribute as well. :P
Don't forget to review! Thanks!