Not Involved
Universe Ident: … 225686551.443
A flash of green light exploded across the underground room as a large machine finished its operating cycle. Two people stood nearby at a control console, one watching the device with an almost child-like glee, while the other appeared to be infinitely more interested in her gloves. When the loud gyrations of the machine finally stopped, the attentive one of the two fairly pranced up to the device's center, at which point stood a hatch which covered what lay within.
The manner of the man's walk contrasted sharply with his appearance. His skin was a deathly pale blue, matched by the dark blue lab suit he wore over it. A shock of deep black hair stood unruly upright on his head, while a long vertical scar marred one side of the man's face. This blemish hardly kept the man from talking, for as soon as he reached the hatch he turned and bellowed in a massive voice, "Behold, Shego, the culmination of my greatest project!"
The other person in the room, a very shapely woman with lime tinted skin, ignored the mad scientist's latest claim to glory and instead continued to file the iron fingertips of her gloves. Shego started a mental countdown just waiting for her crazed boss, Doctor Drakken, to freak out at her inattentiveness.
3…2…1… "SHEGO!" Right on time Doctor D. "I'm sorry, what was that Doc? I kinda zoned out after the first ten minutes of waiting." Shego was in a worse mood then usual regarding Drakken – which was saying something – due to having been forced to wait over an hour for Drakken's machine to finish doing… whatever the hell it was doing.
"Pay more attention Shego," the blue man fumed. "You just happen to be present for one of the greatest moments in the history of mankind!" Drakken ignored the loudly obvious yawn that his second in command let out and continued. "I have just successfully connected two different dimensions. The possibilities of this technology are endless."
Shego was about to suck the wind out of Drakken's sails with one of her trademark quips when a loud banging sounded from inside the machine. Two pairs of eyes were drawn to the hatch in surprise and, in one case, concern. "Uh, Doc, what is that?"
Drakken approached the console and typed in a few commands. The data he received was gibberish to Shego's eyes but the Doc was able to translate it for himself. "It appears we have a guest waiting inside my invention." He grinned deviously and let his fingers fly across the keyboard.
"Guest?" Shego asked, a hint of nervousness creeping into her voice. Realizing this she quickly clenched down on those small portents of fear. Being a thief wanted in eleven countries and boasting the ability to generate steal-melting plasma does not allow one to experience fear, no matter how minor. Still, the green-skinned woman did decide to back up a few paces in deference to her previous experience with her boss's inventions. "What kind of guest?"
Drakken cackled madly and pulled a small remote out of his pocket. He let his hand hover ominously over the button as he proclaimed, "Only the most important traveler in the history of our time. The first person to ever travel between dimensions. Behold!"
At the last word Drakken pushed the button on the remote, opening the hatch on the machine with a quiet hiss of released pressure. A second or two passed in which Shego thought that Drakken's invention had actually failed before a young man climbed out of the hatch and blinked in the harsh lair lights. The boy appeared very nondescript, with simple straight brown hair falling around an average face that currently showed immense surprise. He was not thin, but definitely not overweight either and actually hid any extra fat underneath a large t-shirt and long baggy shorts rather skillfully. His skin had a slight brown tint to it, though whether natural or tanned it was hard to tell. Only the eyes seemed to carry any great distinction, the deep chocolate color projecting a both warm and studious gaze. At first the boy swept his eyes all around the room before finally settling on her. When he did so his mouth dropped open so hard Shego jokingly wondered if he'd dislocated his jaw.
I know that my green skin is a little unusual for most people but from the look on his face it's as if he had seen a ghost of dinosaur trying to eat him. I'm not that dangerous pal.
The young man must have realized how hard he was staring because he quickly turned away in an attempt to save face but the damage was done as far as Shego's opinion of him went. And here I thought Dr. D had actually achieved something. Guess I know better than to make that mistake again.
The Doctor for his part had proudly watched the boy step out and observe the lab but soon grew annoyed at being ignored and coughed loudly. The lad jumped at the sudden sound and whirled in surprise to Drakken, who said, "Welcome to a new dimension."
The traveler stared at him with a completely dumbfounded look on his face and responded with, "Are you shitting me?
Universe Ident: 225686551.115
19 year old college student Brian Forest snapped up his backpack and stuffed his laptop into the largest pocket, grunting as one of the corners got caught on the inner edge. Again. Ugh, I need a bigger backpack. And to buy my books. And my tram card. And my school supplies. UGH! Palm found face as the enormity of the coming school year swept the boy all at once. He almost lost the will to stand up as the sheer amount of work that he would face once his sophomore year started in earnest. A loud sigh left him as he gathered up his stuff for the last day of summer school and made his way to the door. If only I could delay school for just another few weeks. I'm sure I'd be ready by then. Or better yet, how about sending me back to high school huh? Things were so much easier back then. Hell, while I'm busy wishing, why don't I pray to visit an alternate universe where I can meet all of my favorite cartoon characters, cause that's just bound to happen. He growled a bit to himself as he reached the door. The world doesn't work that way moron. If it did I would be suddenly dragged out of my home kicking and screaming by so unknown force.
Just as the boy reached the door and grabbed the handle, a sudden whirlwind started in the center of his room. The hurricane-force winds whipped the lighter objects in the room into a frenzy as Brian found himself drawn into the center of the unnatural storm. Bright green lights flashed around him as the winds continued to accelerate. Then, just as things couldn't get any worse – or stranger – the room around him disappeared in a veil of blackness so complete he thought he'd gone completely blind. Brian lost all feeling in body and his mind cried out for sensory input that was suddenly gone.
Universe Ident: … 225686551.443
Before the emptiness could cause him to go insane, he felt breath return to him as he collapsed onto an unseen floor. A great sigh of relief escaped his lips as Brian stood up and looked around him. Darkness still surrounded him in sightlessness, save for a small sliver of light leaking through some cracks in what appeared to be a wall. The nervous boy approached the light with caution, only just barely keeping sheer bloody panic from overwhelming him. Upon nearing the wall he recognized the shape of the light as similar to a hatch. The teen leaned against the wall, trying to pick out any noises on the other side.
After listening for a few seconds he managed to pick up the sound of a conversation, or at least one part of a conversation as he could only make out one person yelling very loudly. Praying that whoever was outside wouldn't try to harm him, Brian banged on the hatch as hard as he could. Nothing happened for a moment or two, causing Brian to worry that he hadn't been heard. He was about to knock again when the hatch slid open with an ominous hiss. Fighting another wave of fear, Brian forced himself through and stepped out of the dark room.
He was instantly blinded by the strong overhead lights but swiftly managed to blink away the purple spots that blocked his vision. As soon as he did he found himself looking directly at a tall black-haired woman with green skin and an alternating green and black skin-tight cat suit. Normally he would be gladly staring at the woman for her sheer beauty (out of the corner of his eye of course) but what caught his attention in particular was her green skin. Even in this it wasn't exclusively out of surprise, but out of a confusing feeling of familiarity.
It took a few seconds for him to recognize that he was staring very openly and obnoxiously at her and made an attempt to close his mouth. The look of obvious annoyance on her face declared that he had failed miserably, but he felt his mouth fall open again as her face made him realize why she was so familiar.
THAT'S SHEGO! From the show Kim Possible! What the hell is going on here?
As he looked closer he was surprised at how closely she resembled her cartoon origin. Brian was quickly jolted from his surprise when he heard a loud cough to his left. When he turned to the sound he felt a renewed feeling of shock as he found himself staring at what could only be Doctor Drakken, Shego's evil scientist boss from the same TV show. What the hell?
The blue-skinned man swept a hand proudly through the air and loudly boasted, "Welcome to a new dimension."
Brian felt like his brain was going to implode at the sheer impossibility of his current position, and expressed his feeling with a very simple phrase. "Are you shitting me?"
The blue man before him blanched at the foul language, while Shego found her attention placed firmly back on their visitor. A teen with an actual mouth. That's a rare sight.
Drakken took a moment to readjust himself from the shock, then began an obviously prepared speech. "No. I am not 'kidding you' my boy. You are now standing in an entirely different dimension which…"
"Universe."
Drakken was so stunned by the interruption that he completely lost track of his monologue. "What?"
Brian adopted a very studied and calm tone that deeply contrasted his earlier shock. "Universe. Where you've brought me to is a new universe. Dimensions are the different sets of directions that make up time and space. Since I can't see past the next second forward in time, I would guess that the dimensional rating is still the same."
Shego sighed in annoyance. And now he's completely lost me. Somehow Drakken has managed to bring yet another Insufferable Genius into her life. Great.
For his part Drakken actually liked the explanation. He disliked being corrected but he decided to let it go. "Hm, universe does sound better than dimension. Very well, I'm change the name. From now on my machine will be called the InterUniversal Transporter™." *IUT. Remember it. It's important.*
Shego rolled her eyes at the Doc's usual dramatics and returned to her nails. Now comes the boring part.
The InterUniversal Transporter ™ loomed above Brian, its multiple mechanical arms arcing over the machine's center like the branches of a tree. The young man was mystified by the design and couldn't even begin to imagine how it worked. There is no way in hell that I could figure out how to get back home on my own. I just have to hope that Drakken will send me back quickly. To that end, Brian decided to put things back on track. "So, why exactly did you bring me here?"
The piercing question brought Drakken's eyes off the IUT and back to Brian. "Ah yes. Why you're here." Drakken shook his head a bit and mumbled, "To be honest I didn't mean to bring you here at all."
Brian's eye widened in shock. "What."
The Doctor shuffled a bit and responded, "I was only testing the machine to see if it would work. I didn't try to transport anything." The boy's utter stillness actually worried Drakken a bit and he moved closer to see if he was alright.
Brian was too busy being stunned to notice the blue man's concern. The boy's logical mind tried to make sense of what the Doctor had said, but the sheer impossibility of it impeded its success. Instead he felt a blinding, irrational anger sweep through him which overrode his reason. He grabbed Drakken and roughly shoved him up against his machine while loudly yelling, "You mean to tell me I was brought here on ACCIDENT!"
The raging screams jerked Shego out of her peaceful solitude to see Drakken being held two feet off the ground and jammed against the IUT. The green skinned woman was about to jump in and blast the boy with some plasma when he let Drakken go on his own. Oh come on, kid. Make up your damn mind!
Brian shook a bit as his anger drained away and was replaced with shame. "I'm sorry. Really. I don't usually lose control of myself like that. Won't happen again, I promise." The boy shuddered at how deeply he had lost himself in those moments and silently reminded himself about why he'd put such an effort into controlling his anger. The last time this happened I seriously beat up that one bully. Sure he deserved to be punished but knocking out a tooth and spraining his arm was too much. I need to keep myself in control if I'm going to get back home.
Shego huffed in disappointment at the quiet resolution to the unexpected problem. Just as it started to get exciting. What is with this kid anyway? One moment he's saying stuff that outsmarts Dr. D., next he's holding him up by his collar. Shego paused as she returned to that last thought. Wait a second. That kid is no larger than that buffoon sidekick Princess drags along with her, yet he was able to lift a grown man off his feet with no problem. I may have to watch this guy more closely. Shego settled back into her spot leaning against the console and pretended to be once again engrossed with her gloves. However, she now kept one eye actively on both men as she filed, not eager to be caught off guard again.
Drakken, meanwhile, had completely forgotten the whole incident the moment Brian apologized. Perhaps he was just so used to constant threats from Shego that he'd become inured to actual injury. Or maybe he was just a complete dunce. Brian had no idea which.
"Ah, well anyway as I was saying I wasn't aiming at anything in particular to transport with the IUT. If I programmed it correctly then that means it would have grabbed up whatever loose items were near you when you transported. Do you want to see if there is anything inside the machine from your universe?"
Brian contemplated the Doc's words for a moment before he remembered what he had been doing before his life had been ripped from his hands. A few tendrils of hope rolled into the boy's mind and he raced into the machine, nearly banging his head on the hatch in his haste. He scrambled about in the sudden darkness, hands brushing against several random bits of debris that had been swept in from his room. This thing is a lot bigger than it looks on the outside. How does that work exactly?
A minute passed and Brian was no closer to finding his backpack. He was about to give up hope when a pale green light shone around the dark chamber. Brian knew where the light had to be coming from but did not dare turn around. He instead focused on his backpack, which was lying in the corner with numerous books piled against it. He swiftly snapped it up and turned to leave.
As he did he caught a glimpse of Shego's plasma power for the first time. The green fire-like substance roiled over the woman's palm in a beautiful and haunting dance which belied its ferocious power. His expression of awe much have surprised the super-human as she quirked an eyebrow at him in confusion. Brian felt a bit embarrassed and shuffled past Shego into the lab. As he did, he turned and said, "Thanks."
The green-skinned woman was shocked at how honest and sincere the comment was. She briefly fumbled for an answer, then mumbled a nearly silent, "No big… deal." The boy nodded in response and walked past her to the Doctor, who was gesturing to a table that had just been set up by a pair of retreating minions. That… he… What the hell was that? He just… said thanks, even though I hardly did anything. I only helped because I was bored and wanted to get this done, but… Shego shook her head to clear her mind of the weird thoughts waving through it.
She and Drakken sat at a recently setup table as Brian placed his backpack on the table and tore through it, quickly checking to make sure everything was there. Computer, charger, headphones, wireless mouse and batteries, cellphone, wallet, keys, summer textbook, two water bottles, and one well stocked lunch box. He sighed loudly as he replaced everything into the backpack and placed it next to him on the floor.
Drakken had quietly fidgeted while Brian was checking his belongings, eager to start his interrogation. Once the boy had finished repacking his bag and turned toward them the Doctor launched a barrage of questions at him, asking just as fast as his tongue could wag. They came so fast the Brian could barely hear them, let alone come up with an answer of any depth. "Hey, wait moment there. Slow down Doc," Brian said calmly. "I can't even understand what you're saying."
Drakken halted in his excitement and awkwardly tried to apologize. Brian waved him off and replied, "Hey, it's okay. I get it. I've got a lot of questions too, believe me. How about this? We'll ask questions in turn, first you then me and so on. How's that sound?"
Shego silently agreed that it was a good idea, and was about to quip as such when she noticed something he'd said. He called Drakken 'Doc'. Neither of us has said our names yet. How could he know what Drakken calls himself? Shego grunted to nab the attention away from Drakken, who was just about to ask a question, and asked, "How did you know Drakken was a doctor?"
Brian quickly realized that he had slipped up and fought a sudden urge to gulp ominously. He thankfully managed to whip out his poker face and came up with an alibi. "Well, uh, come on. What else could he be? Could anyone else but a PhD make an InterUniversal Transporter™ by themselves?" The answer seemed to satisfy Drakken, but Shego didn't appear very reassured. He chuckled a little, trying in vain to defuse the tension the hung around the table. To his relief, and a bit to his suspicion, Shego nonchalantly shrugged and returned to her nail file.
Wow, she really does that. That is both awesome and frightening at the same time. Brian thought that was an apt description of the woman herself, her stunning beauty hiding a temperamental fire hotter than the Sun. If I want to avoid getting burned, literally, I'm going to have to be a lot more careful.
The mental battle that had gone on between Brian and Shego was completely lost on Drakken, who impatiently motioned for a return question. His annoyed grumbling brought Brian back to the conversation at hand. "Oh right. Sorry. I was a bit distracted by how weird this all is. It's not every day that I get sucked out of my room for no explicable reason and am dragged into a completely different universe. You should try it some time. It's a hoot."
Drakken was clearly confused by the subtle sarcasm, but Shego smirked at the semi-hidden joke. Brian caught the reaction and smiled a bit in response, which threw Shego for a bit of a loop. What is with that look? I liked his joke, so what? Why is he giving me that stupid smile? The woman's frown returned and she returned to her nails, her eyes becoming hidden by a lock of her long hair.
Brian raised an eyebrow in confusion at the blatant attempt to ignore him, but let it go as part of Shego's natural soloist nature. Still, he wanted to know more about these people who were sitting across from him. They may look and act exactly like the characters in the show, but Brian knew that the instant the multiverse came into play, ALL bets were off. Everything was possible and ANYTHING was permitted. He would admit, with his luck and the added factor of him tempting fate to do exactly this, odds were that he had indeed ended up in the universe which accurately represented the Kim Possible TV show. But, there were a billion other possibilities that could result in his death, dismemberment, or even worse, MARY SUEDOM! This last one was what Brian feared most, for it was becoming increasingly clear that his situation was very reminiscent of several self-insert fics he'd passed through in his spare time over the summer. While a few of them ranged between good and passable, the vast majority of them were complete dog-crap, and if he was stuck in one of those then he was well and truly screwed. For it brought up the question, was he his own person, or was he an original character created by some random fan of a finished series? *Note, the name Brian Forrest was taken from a fanfiction called 'The Ultimate Ace'. Aside from the name he is an original character. DUE KNOT STEEL!*
Brian suppressed his fears for the moment and asked, "So anyway, just a quick question here, how exactly are you able to produce that green fire? Is it some sort of fire inducing field generated by those gloves you are constantly slaving over?" Shego's smirk reappeared as she shook her head and stayed silent. "Okay. How about this? Your suit carries some sort of flammable gas that is released from your palm and ignites upon contact with the atmosphere. Am I close?"
Shego scoffed and replied, "Does it look like I have room in this thing to hide a gallon of gasoline?"
Brian sighed and stated in a deadpan, "No, no you probably don't. Fine, I give up. It's superpowers isn't it." The green-skinned woman merely nodded and Brian groaned in response. "I'm in a world with superpowers. Great." When both the adults sitting across from him gave him questioning looks, he explained, "Universes with superpowers tend to have superheroes and super villains and evil plots and blah, blah, blah. Which is not something I want to deal with. Sure it's fun to read about and enjoy from far away, but being inside those worlds usually sucks for all involved. And trust me when I say I do not want to be involved in any of that."
To her surprise, Shego found herself slightly agreeing with the boy. Her powers had always been more trouble than they were worth as the ability to conjure steel-melting plasma is not something that can be easily ignored by civilians and police alike.
Brian noticed their silence and continued with his question, asking, "So, how many other people have powers like yours?"
Shego turned to Drakken, who shrugged, then replied, "So far as I know, me and my brothers are the only people in the world with powers like these." Shego shuddered a bit as the thought of her brothers appeared unbidden in her mind.
Brian mulled that over for a bit, thinking that it was probably true given that weird alien rainbow comets are not a common occurrence. He nodded and asked, "How did your family get your powers? Radiation or scientific experimentation?" Upon mentioning the second he snidely looked at Drakken in mock suspicion.
The blue man was about to say otherwise when Shego cut him off by saying, "I think it was radiation or something. The scientists were too busy fawning over their data to be very clear."
"Ah, but radiation from what? The irradiated energy from standard nuclear reactions is pretty much overwhelmingly negative, regardless of what fiction likes to think. So if you gained your powers from changed DNA due to radiation, it must be of a radically different type than what can be found on Earth."
Oddly enough Shego found that she could understand this explanation far better than the boy's previous one about Drakken's apparently incorrect name. Perhaps it is because he's talking about something I actually am familiar with this time. Still, if Drakken tried to say the same thing there's no way anyone would get it. Shego responded to the rather astute question by snarking, "Does a rainbow-colored comet from outside our solar system count?"
Brian mimicked a look of confusion on his face to mask his knowledge and deadpanned, "A rainbow comet?" When Shego nodded in response he sighed and said, "What are the unicorns of Equestria in charge of superpowers now?"
Both adults looked at him in complete confusion, and Brian realized how much that sounded like a Non Sequitor. He crossed his arms and said, "Don't Ask. Trust me, You Do Not Want To Know." He paused as he remembered some of Drakken's crazier antics in the show, and restated, "I think."
Now Shego felt even more confused, but decided it would be too difficult to decipher his meaning and just ask her question. "So, now that you know more about my powers, why don't you explain who you are and why you seem to be taking this so calmly?" Drakken was about to add his own questions to the mix, but stopped when Shego kicked him under the table.
Brian chuckled at the quiet yelp the doctor let out, then leaned far back in his chair and replied, "I may appear visibly calm, but believe me, if you could see my mind right now you would have an easier time picking your way through an Antarctic blizzard than seeing anything coherent. Thankfully for all of us I have a little bit of third-hand experience of this kind of situation through my incessant reading of science fiction stories. You'd be surprised how many times this sort of thing pops up in literature. Though I never expected it to actually be put to use, I know enough about how to handle a cross-universe meeting to keep myself from saying something really stupid. For the most part." Drakken nodded in understanding and motioned him to continue, trying and failing miserably to hide his notepad from Brian's sight.
"Anyway, you might be disappointed to find out that I'm no one special. My name is Brian Forrest, don't laugh," Drakken quickly shut up, "and I'm just an average college student trying to learn his place in the world. A world I'm not sure I'll ever get back to now."
When Drakken showed that he was still too hung up on Brian's name to respond, Shego elbowed him hard, pointing his attention back to the conversation at hand. "Aw, yes, well, as Shego was kind enough to remind me just now," Shego stuck out her tongue to him and he sneered in response, "I should probably get to work finding a way for you to return home. Though I would be very grateful if I could perhaps scan your computer to see if it has any interesting technologies."
Brian narrowed his eyes in response and grabbed up his backpack, clutching it tightly to him. "Forgive me if I'm wrong, but I highly doubt any of the tech on my computer could match up to making an InterUniversal Transporter™."
Shego silently took note of his protectiveness and assigned the backpack the appropriate level of importance. If they needed him to do something, she would just snatch the computer and threaten it with some plasma. It probably wouldn't come to that in most situations, but it paid to always be prepared.
When Drakken held up his hands in a clear surrendering gesture, Brian's arms uncoiled a bit and he asked, "So, now that you know about me, tell me about yourselves." Drakken took in a long breath to prepare for his long speech, but let it out in one large humph when Brian said, "Her first."
Shego turned away from her questioner and started filing her nails again, choosing to respond with, "Name's Shego. Got plasma powers. Work for Dr. Drakken."
Brian's annoyance was clear in his voice as he asked, "That's it?"
"That's it."
"Aw come on. Every superhuman has to have a backstory. What was it?"
Shego continued to remain silent, though a slight smile graced her lips to show that she was enjoying his frustration.
"Please. You didn't even tell me where or when the comet affected you. Did it crash into your house, were you or your family injured, did your parents…" STOP! Brian fell silent as brain caught up with his mouth. Are you trying to give yourself away?
But I need to know these things so that I can tell what kind of Shego I'm dealing with here. Has she ever killed someone? Did she become evil out of frustration or out of a genuine darkness? I won't know unless I ask.
And how do you think she would respond to these questions? Just sit there and loyally answer every random thing that pops into your mind? Brian found that he could not answer that. How would he respond to such questions? With quiet indignity or a punch to the face?
Probably a fast fist all things considered. Brian mentally shook his head, annoyed that a part of himself thought that violence was the answer. If you think that you would find such questions worthy of violence, how do you think Shego would respond?The resulting shudder was enough to force him to concede the point. Knowledge of your situation is important, but it does not take precedence over keeping yourself hidden. If people in this universe found out you know about them, the results would be unpredictably chaotic and quite possibly dangerous.
And we all know how great you are in a fight. Brian bristled a bit at the jab, but did not argue. 'Fine,' Brian thought back. 'I'll drop it for now. But as soon as I can ask from a secure position, I will find out her secrets.' The two mental projections of himself nodded their assent and retreated into his mind.
When Brian finally returned to the table, he found both adults staring at him, one with slight concern, and the other with confused annoyance bordering on anger. He smiled sheepishly, rubbing the back of his head as he said, "Sorry, I was just arguing with myself. I realized that it was rude to ask you so many questions about something you probably don't like to think about. I sincerely apologize for my mistake."
Shego again found herself disarmed by the boy's politeness and sincerity and had to look away to hide her blush of embarrassment. When it became apparent that she wasn't going to turn back, Drakken launched into a long tirade about his disappointing life. Brian listened politely to the blue doctor's rants about his miserable childhood, traitorous college friends, stupid scientific peers, and the persecutions of an uncomprehending world. The boy was encouraged to see that nearly everything the doctor said was in keeping with the history he remembered from the show, with some added tidbits that he had been unaware of.
One thing that caught his interest was a story Drakken told about how he'd beaten a bunch of bullies at their own game by finding an older student and having them warn the punks off. Seems that the idea of bodyguards was something he'd been thinking about for many years. Maybe that's why he can't get anything done without Shego. He feels too vulnerable without somebody to protect him.
By the time Drakken had finished Shego had gotten over her annoyance and yet again returned to her gloves. Seriously, how often does she have to file those things? It's not like they'll self-destruct without her attention. Maybe she does it to try and annoy whoever she is speaking with?
Brian could definitely see her doing something like that, given her predilection for messing with her enemy's mind. Not that it helps against…
QUIET!
What?!
If you even think about her, she will show up and destroy everything, including our way out of here!
But…
Tell me I'm wrong. Please.
Sigh. Your right. Self-inserts demand that the method of arrival be destroyed on arrival so that the guy who is brought in stuck there and forced to take part in whatever random hijinks the author wants. Brian felt a sudden spike of fear at the thought of the sheer madness that could ensue in the Kim Possible universe, a world full of mad scientist super villains and random unexplained science that could spell either doom or candy for those involved. It would be best if we avoid steering the conversation anywhere near Miss Cartoon Title and just focus on convincing Drakken to let us leave.
To that end Brian coughed to attract Shego's attention. When the green-skinned woman looked over, Brian motioned for her to get Drakken to pause for a moment. Shego interpreted this request as a suggestion to tip over the doctor's chair, knocking him flat on his back. Drakken began muttering numerous pseudo-obscenities as he stood back up, giving Brian plenty of time to recover from his near laughing fit. By the time Dr. D had reseated himself- after giving Shego something that was vaguely similar to a death glare but too weak to qualify- Brian had managed to restrain himself and asked without giggling, "So, Drakken, this is all very interesting, in a mind-destroying-through-revelation kind of way, but I do really hope to be able to return home soon. I would very much appreciate it if you could set up the InterUniversal Transporter™ and sent me back to my room. I would hate to miss that discussion that we were supposed to have on quantum mechanics, especially since I have some extra special thoughts on it now that this has happened."
When Brian finished his question he noticed that Drakken had hidden his hands behind his back like a naughty child would from a parent and had started to back away until he was far enough from the table that he would be out of its range if flung. "Well," he chuckled nervously, "I would love to send you back right now, but there's a problem. You see, when I first designed the IUT I realized that there would be problems with the stability of the universal, eh, barriers that could destroy the entirety of both universes."
"Barriers?"
"Yes, the walls, so to speak, that separate the different universes. My machine is able to break through these walls in a very limited area and create a connection between my lab and the destination. The problem arises from the fact that these walls do not like to be breached, and respond negatively to further attempts to smash through within a given time period."
Brian could see where this train of logic was traveling and feared the station it would pull into. "How long is this time period?"
Drakken turned away at that and tried to mumble his answer, prompting a very loud bang as Brian brought his foot down flat on the concrete floor and actually spread a few cracks from the force. The now obviously nervous doctor squeaked a bit then managed to spit out, "About two months."
The young college boy felt what little of his hopes that he had left shatter into uncountable pieces as he fell to his knees in shock. Two months. Two whole months. I am going to be lucky to see my home again after nearly sixty days stuck in this universe. So much time would pass on their side, would I even be able to recover? School would be well started by then. My scholarship would be canceled due to my disappearance and my parents would give everything I have to my brothers. How devastated would they be, to have their oldest son suddenly cease to exist out of nowhere? Would they miss my as much as I would miss them? Would they miss me more?
Despair began to wrap around Brian as the full implications of such a long absence continued to pour in on him. He could feel the beginnings of tears forming in his eyes, but he was beyond caring about the meaningless rules of manhood at this point. Just as he was about to collapse in a final loss of will, he felt a hand fall on his shoulder. He turned and looked above him, and found himself unsure of how to feel as he saw Shego of all people give him an encouraging smile. Confusion replaced hopelessness as his primary feeling, but the meaning of the small gesture did not escape the boy. He managed a half smile back and eventually pushed himself up a sitting position, though he lacked the strength to stand yet.
Shego stood just behind him, still unsure of what possessed her to do what she had done. Equally surprising was the fact that she could not find any reason for her to regret it, despite how strange it was for her to do something like that for someone.
Thankfully for both of them, Drakken was not finished with his explanations, as he continued, "There is no reason to worry so much. The wait may be two months here, but once the machine is ready I can sent you to any point in time in that universe."
"What? But how?"
Drakken smiled broadly as he said, "The true brilliance of my InterUniversal Transporter™ is that it can connect to any point in time and any place in the universe selected. I could put you in Berlin as Hitler rose to power, on the Moon just as Thomas Weller landed and said his speech. Heck, I could even put you in the center of the galaxy just as the Milky Way was about to form. Or at least I could if I hadn't put in specific program designed to keep the machine from connecting anywhere besides Earth within a certain set of years, namely between 1985 and 2035. That way, I would know that anyone brought through would probably understand most of how the machine works. Well, that was the plan for the second use anyway."
Brian felt a surge of hope *Why are there so many damn water based metaphors in this thing?* at the doctor's words and immediately stood up again. "So you're saying that I could go back to literally a few seconds before I disappeared as if nothing had happened." Shego was glad that he had clarified, because she had been absolutely lost during Drakken's speech. "But that still leaves me the problem of being stuck here for two months. What the hell am I supposed to do in the mean time? And how do I know the machine will be safe for that long?"
Drakken waved away the boy's concerns and said, "Don't worry boy. You will have plenty to occupy your time with here with us." Brian didn't like the smirk that he was sporting as he said that. "As for the machine's safety, that will not be a concern so long as…"
A loud boom sounded from the far wall of the chamber, forcing everyone inside to crouch down to avoid the debris raining down on them. *Raining. See, another water metaphor. How many more are there?* Brian felt all the hope he'd just gained from Drakken's reassurances drain away *SERIOUSLY* as he looked up to see just what he'd feared most.
In the gaping hole created in the explosion stood two teens younger than him, one a boy with short blonde hair who seemed to be hiding behind the other, a brilliantly red-headed girl with green eyes and an attitude that seeped *OH COME ON! THAT ONE WAS ON PURPOSE!* confidence. Brian began to cringe as the girl proudly proclaimed, "It's over Drakken."
Drakken staggered to his feet and yelled out obnoxiously, "Kim Possible!"
Brian quickly realized there was only one thing he could do at this point. He got to his feet, walked over to the control console and started banging his head against the metal as rapidly as possible.