Title: Still Innocent
Character(s): Marauders & Remus L
Summary: he was always lying – lying about where he was really going when he said he was visiting his mother. Constantly lying to himself and his friends,
Notes: Okay, so this is a random one-shot that I came up with. You see I was wondering how the Marauders responded to Remus' curse and so I decided to write my own version. Reviews are appreciated as per usual – Take care!
It looks as if Remus really did it this time; he was always lying – lying about where he was really going when he said he was visiting his mother. Constantly lying to himself and his friends,
"My mum's fallen ill, I've been given time off to go visit her. I'll see you three when I get back."
James knows that Remus is lying; he just wishes that Remus would tell them his secret, be a little more open to them. After all, someone's mother wouldn't get that ill every month, and if she's seriously sick then why would Remus have to go through the pain of seeing his mother dying every month?
Sirius suspects something. He knows that something weird is going on, something suspicious, but he doesn't know what. He knows something is up with Remus but he doesn't know whether it's with his background or whether it's something to do with Remus himself.
Peter tries not to wonder about Remus. After all, Remus is his friend, and his business is his own, but the plump Gryffindor knows what it's like to keep secrets, and it can't be very easy for Remus – could it?
The three marauders just want the truth – they don't want to end before they've even begun.
Remus' secret bites away at him, killing him from the inside – making it almost impossible for him to recover and pretend that for one moment, he's just a normal person,
He's not though – he's not innocent like a child is, he's aged. It scares him, he doesn't want to be to mature – but he is.
James plans out how to learn about Remus' secret, he'll use his cloak and he'll take notes on when he disappears, as if it'll offer any extra information.
Sirius doesn't want to be suspicious any more, but he still does some background research – looking in Remus' trunk to see if there are any clues on why the second year always seems to disappear.
Peter doesn't do anything on the matter, he knows that one day Remus will confide in them, and so he sits down and starts his Astronomy homework, trying to ignore the nagging feeling in the back of his head. He wants to think that Remus and he were both good enough friends that one day... though he's not so sure.
It seems however that Peter himself is the first to figure out Remus' secret, and though he's shocked to start off with – and a bit scared, it doesn't change his judgement. It does make him understand Remus' predicament.
Peter goes to Remus the following day, in the hospital wing, where he knows that Remus will be due to the full moon the previous night.
Remus' lip trembles when Peter tells him that he knows. He has to try extremely hard not to let tears spill from his golden eyes, but he somehow manages not to. He can't help but cry though, when Peter tells him that James and Sirius don't know – that he understands that his lycanthropy should be kept secret and that he won't tell the two marauders.
Peter also confides in Remus – telling him that he's still Remus that he's not going to abandon the twelve year old just because he's a slave to the moon. He also points out that he's never going to use his condition against him.
Remus calls Peter insane – Peter smiles,
"Maybe I am," He says in reply, as he passes Remus a chocolate frog, "But all the cool people are these days."
Remus and Peter get closer and closer during the next few weeks, whether it's because Peter doesn't care about Remus' lycanthropy or that Remus is just so much more open to Peter, because he's accepted by one of his friends – one of his best friends.
It gives Remus hope.
James looks through his notes – joining forces with Sirius and the two compare their information on Remus. They don't know why, but they don't include Peter in this, after all, Peter never mentioned any suspicions about Remus and they don't want to get him caught in the middle of something that could just be paranoia.
Sirius figures out next – though he doesn't go to anyone about it. He needs to get his head wrapped around the fact that one of his best friends is a Werewolf. He doesn't tell James, or Peter and he definitely doesn't tell Remus.
He doesn't understand how something so dark and evil could reside in someone who he had once called 'friend'. He asks himself how he could let Remus manipulate him into thinking he's something good. He wonders how a dark creature could even get sorted into Gryffindor anyway.
James finds out last, though as soon as he finds out he goes straight to Remus,
"You've been hiding a very big secret Remus," He tells the werewolf, one day when Remus is writing up an essay alone in the dormitory.
Remus looks up, his eyes questioning, before asking James what on earth he's talking about,
James goes on about how he found out Remus' secret a few hours ago – and that he didn't care. He smiles, but in his eyes, Remus can see that James is worrying about what happens to Remus when he transforms.
Remus tells James that Peter knows about him, something that James immediately places into his mind – it made sense why the two marauders had been closer. But then he says that Sirius hasn't said or even mentioned anything about knowing Remus' secret.
But then again, James and Remus keep in mind that Sirius had been distant from everyone recently, almost as if he was keeping his own secret.
Remus says that he needs to tell Sirius – it's not fair for the other two marauders to know about him, and not Sirius. It would be making a fool out of him when he finds out.
The three find Sirius sat by the fire the following night, staring into space as the flames illuminated his features. The three waited until the last of the Gryffindor's had gone up to bed before they approached him. The flames had turned into embers by that time, though they still lit the room up in a calm and soothing atmosphere.
"Sirius," James breaks the silence, and though Sirius doesn't respond, the group all know he's listening, "We want to tell you something,"
Sirius blinks, as he tears his eyes from nothingness, and looks over at the three marauders – his eyes give the impression that he is distressed, almost pained. In fact he looks as if he had been sitting in silent anguish the entire night, and that he's fighting an internal battle with himself.
"What is it?" His voice is hollow, as if he doesn't want to try to mask his emotions, something that would cause him to be frowned upon if he were at home in the most noble and ancient house of Black.
"I – "Remus starts, but he stops when Sirius' eyes land on him expectantly, full of an expression that he has never seen before from the Black heir. He doesn't know how to describe it.
"Go on Remus," Peter adds, urging Remus on, "You can do this,"
Remus looks back into Sirius' eyes looking at him with a quizzical expression,
"But Peter..." Remus seems to deflate slightly, not tearing his gaze away from Sirius, "He already knows..."
Peter and James frown slightly, before James states,
"You said he hasn't told you he knows,"
Silence spreads across the room, consuming the four Marauders as Sirius stands up looking at Remus with blank eyes, he seems so miserable.
The clock ticks slowly, each second causing the silence to grow longer and longer – before Sirius says out loud,
"I don't know what to say."
"Oh..."
Sirius looks at Remus one last time, with his blank eyes, before he makes a decision – does he choose his friend, or his lifestyle? The life he was raised with,
"Do... have you ever bit someone?"
Remus' eyes widen in surprise, before he tells Sirius he would never, begs him to understand that he would never wish his curse on someone else. He tells Sirius that he would never give his curse to any one because everyone gives up on a werewolf, no one believes in them.
Finally his face portrays emotion,
"It's alright, I haven't given up on you – we haven't abandoned you Remus."
The marauders haven't broken apart yet – after all they were still at the start of their friendship, and they solemnly swore that they were up to no good.