A/N: Inspired by the awesome author, Reizbar-Ookami, and her Cloud/Leon story, "Journal Entry." Yes, I take a small tale of woe, and turn it into a multi-chaptered angst fest. I got the original author's OK and I'm running with it. Another insomnia special. Please read Warning before reading further. Originally published 12/08/08. Revised 2/18/09.

Warning!: This story, in future chapters will contain vast amounts of Mental and Sexual Abuse against the characters of Leon (Squall) and Reno by Cloud Strife. If the reader finds this distasteful, PLEASE HIT THE BACK BUTTON! The chapters following Chapter 3 get harsh and will probably only get harsher. If you're okey-dokey with it, by all means, read on.

Fandom: Kingdom Hearts

Summary: Leon had everything planned for his life with Cloud. He just didn't realize that Cloud was an uncaring jerk.

Pairings: Cloud/Leon

Warnings: Yaoi, SEX, Major Lion ANGST, Bastard Chocobo, Simpering Stalker! Tifa, Sad Yuffie, Cursing

Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters in this fan fiction.

Chapter 1 - Lion Leaves For Good

XXX

Leon was so excited. He just came back from the Moogles and his gift, to Cloud, was all gift-wrapped and hidden. He couldn't wait to see his face, when he gave it to him. It was all going according to plan. It had taken two years and tentative steps, but Cloud Strife was going to be his forever.

First, he'd give him the gift, wait a couple of days, and ask Cloud to marry him.

Leon had been waiting, patiently, for Cloud to propose to him, but it seemed to be the last thing on his mind.

Whenever Leon referred to other acquaintances joining up and getting married, Cloud would just grunt and turn over in bed.

Leon figured that Tifa, with her constant stalking, had made Cloud leery of the whole scenario.

Leon caught his own reflection in the mirror. Well, he just knew Cloud didn't lump him with her. He thought Leon was special, or else he wouldn't have started sleeping with him, after two years of waiting. Right?

Leon shook his head and reminded himself. Negativity be gone! Only good feelings tonight.

Leon smiled brightly, as the door to his bedroom opened, and Cloud tromped in with a weary gait.

With Sephiroth's defeat, Cloud only had his daily Heartless and Nobody patrol to keep him occupied. It was Tifa's constant badgering that consistently wore him down. He could take battling Darkness born enemies just fine.

Tifa Lockheart was a force that rivaled a seven-headed Hydra and three-headed Cerberus together.

Leon ran to Cloud, gave him a big, deep kiss welcome, and helped him take off his sword harness, shoulder guard, and battle skirt.

Cloud rotated his shoulder to get the kinks out. His gaze moved up and down Leon's tight form.

Cloud knew another way to get the kinks out. He just kicked himself for not taking advantage of it for almost two years. It was another thing he blamed Sephiroth for.

Leon giggled, as he looked down to Cloud's ungloved hands coming around, and wrapping tightly around his thin waist.

Leon was only wearing his white t-shirt and leather pants, forgoing the rest to give Cloud easy access. He tilted his head to the side to give Cloud more of his neck to kiss and lick.

At Cloud's request, Leon had happily let his hair grow, so it was longer that it was in Traverse Town.

Leon sometimes thought he was looking more and more like his late father, Laguna.

Leon was warned of Cloud's lusty intentions when he growled, unfastened Leon's pants, and dove his hand in. He mewled as Cloud harshly fisted his penis into a full erection. He laid his full body weight back against Cloud's body and ground his ass against Cloud's cloth covered erection.

Cloud's snuffling nose now buried in Leon's long locks, inhaling his sweet scent.

It had been a hard day for Cloud and his patience was already worn thin.

In one motion, Cloud slightly backed up, withdrew his hand from Leon's pants, and threw Leon roughly onto the bed.

Leon landed in a breathless huff and turned around on the bed to spy Cloud hastily taking the rest of his clothes off. He took the hint, pulled off his t-shirt, and removed his pants and boxers, so he would be naked.

Cloud quickly climbed on top of Leon, while deeply kissing him.

Their tongues battling for dominance, which Leon always let Cloud win.

With their lower bodies grinding against each other, Cloud rested his upper body weight on one forearm, and reached down with his hand to Leon's entrance. He jerked back and looked down to the place where his hand had ended up.

Leon had lubricated and stretched himself out, as best as he could, for Cloud.

Cloud looked back up to see a tentatively smiling Leon. He gazed at Cloud like a puppy wanting to be told it had done a good job.

Cloud's answer was a grunt and nod in approval.

Leon beamed with joy. It had taken him all day to fight through his prudishness, but it had borne success.

Cloud now rested his upper body weight on both forearms, and thrust into Leon, in one go.

Leon's eyes rolled up into the back of his head and his hands clenched tightly to Cloud's muscular biceps. He wrapped his legs around Cloud's lower back, to signify he was ready, and Cloud began to harshly pound into Leon.

Leon would have liked a little more foreplay, and some basic gentleness thrown his way, but Cloud had never shown any, so Leon believed that this was just the way Cloud was. It never crossed his mind that Cloud was using him as a convenient fuck toy.

Leon occupied himself by masturbating and clenching his anal muscles with Cloud's thrusts. He knew Cloud wouldn't wait for his satisfaction, so he needed to get it before Cloud came.

Leon was just about to come, when Cloud screamed and came with a loud squelch inside Leon.

Leon frantically fisted himself and screamed as he orgasmed. He made sure that he got all his semen on himself.

Cloud had looked a little disgusted last time, when some had gotten on his chest.

Leon wanted this night to be perfect for Cloud.

Cloud inhaled and exhaled harshly, over a gasping Leon, before he roughly pulled out, and flopped on his back.

Leon had winced and wanted to protest with the rough handling, but he reminded himself. Stick to the mission! Don't irritate Cloud like Tifa does all day.

Leon got up and retrieved a warm towel that he had readied just for the occasion. He made sure Cloud was completely clean before he cleansed himself. Cloud had covered his Mako-blue eyes with one arm. He didn't even say thank you.

Seeing Cloud was now relaxed and relatively stress-free, Leon saw his chance. He gingerly made his way over to his set of drawers and took out Cloud's gift that he had sweated and bled for. It took most of his winnings, that he had earned in the first Coliseum tournaments, but he had collected more, with the Paradox battles, for their nest egg. When he saw the results, he knew it had been worth every munny.

Leon sat down on the bed, near Cloud's legs, and waited. "Cloud?"

"Huh?"

"Umm. Well… I've noticed for awhile that the buckle for your sword harness was getting worn, so I had the Moogles fashion me a new one for you. I hope you like it."

Cloud frowned and he moved his arm away from his eyes, so he could move his head up, to see Leon holding out a small, wrapped package towards him. Cloud took it, and placed it on his chest, staring at it.

"Uh. Aren't you going to open it?"

Cloud stared at the gift for a little while longer, shrugged, and then tore off the beautiful wrapping, throwing it carelessly on the floor. He opened the lid to see a gold belt buckle. It wasn't frou-frou and ostentatious.

Leon knew better than to get Cloud something of that nature. An observer would have to look very closely to see the intricate design interwoven throughout the buckle. The magical stones were actually secured on the inside of the buckle, where no one could see them, and they would still do their job.

Cloud's gaze moved back up to Leon's hopeful one. "Nice."

Leon beamed like the sun and clapped his hands. He quickly halted when Cloud frowned at the display of joy. "Do you mind if I put it on your harness right now?"

Cloud shrugged and handed it to Leon, who jumped up, quickly removed the old buckle, and replaced it with the new. He smiled and did a little clap in front of his body so Cloud wouldn't see.

"Hey."

Leon turned around to face a still frowning Cloud. "It's cold. Come to bed. Got an early patrol tomorrow."

Leon smiled wider and dove for the bed. He nestled his body next to Cloud's.

Cloud never held him, but he allowed Leon this. Leon was content, for now. He was sure, after they were married, that Cloud would be more affectionate.

Leon sighed as he considered his mission completed and a job well done. In a few days, he'd propose to Cloud.

Cloud would grunt, "Yes," and they would have a good, stable marriage, maybe with some children.

Leon fell asleep, still smiling. He couldn't wait.

Cloud stayed awake, staring up at the ceiling, listening to Leon breathe in-and-out, all night long.

XXX

Leon's hopes were cruelly dashed the next morning, as he walked across the Marketplace to deliver a box of Gummi parts for Cid. His blue-gray eyes spied Tifa, and he automatically cased the area, looking for the nearest exit away from her.

Ever since Leon had started sleeping with Cloud, a meeting with Tifa was just asking for a case of heartburn.

Leon's eyes halted their darting around as they saw the belt buckle holding up Tifa's skirt.

For a minute, his brain refused to work. It had to be a different buckle, but the one Tifa was wearing was brand new, and Leon knew it was one of a kind. His mind automatically dismissed Tifa stealing it from Cloud, like Rinoa stole his ring from him.

Cloud's enhanced senses felt the wind change on the other side of the Planet. There was no way Tifa could steal the buckle from his sword harness.

Leon knew Cloud never removed the sword harness until his patrol was over.

In his sinking heart, Leon knew the truth, but he had to find out for himself. No matter the pain. He waited until Tifa confidently strode up to him with an extremely self-satisfied look on her face. "Hey, Tifa. Nice belt buckle."

Tifa's gaze moved down and she gleefully ran her hand over the belt buckle."Yeah, isn't it nice. Cloud said that he found it in a pile of junk he had lying around. When I caught up to him at the Bailey, he handed it to me, and said I could have it. His old sword harness buckle worked fine. It's really pretty, especially when I discovered the stones on the other side. I mean there are even jewels all the way from Atlantica! Cloud just doesn't appreciate the finer things in life. Well, I love him anyway. One day, he'll love me just as much."

Leon, who was now seeing it up close, recognized the intricate design that he had designed himself for the Moogles to place on the buckle. His face felt frozen. He couldn't even blink. His whole body felt numb. Cloud didn't see him as special at all. He was considered on the same level as Tifa, the dreaded stalker.

Leon felt like Cloud had spit on his face, kicked him in the stomach, and then kicked him in the head. It actually would have been better if he had done that. Leon, at least could have defended himself. But this?

Leon refused to lose face in public. Thank God for a crappy childhood!

Leon knew how to put on a false mask better than anybody. He made his face slightly smile in Tifa's simpering direction. He was afraid his face was going to shatter. "Good for you, Tifa. Uh. I gotta finish this delivery and get back to help Cid with some city planning."

Tifa shrugged as her face lit up. Leon closed his eyes in dread. Tifa, looking like that, meant only one thing. "Oh, Cloud! I was just showing Leon the new buckle you gave me. He thinks it's pretty too. See! I told you that it wasn't junk!"

Leon slowly turned around. His face still frozen with a slight smile.

Cloud's face was as blank as always. A stranger would think it was any other day in Cloud's life.

Leon caught himself from snorting in disgust. Well, to Cloud, it was just another ordinary day, because, apparently, Leon didn't mean anything to him.

Leon thought back, with blinding speed, over the past months with Cloud. He'd been such a love-sick fool.

Cloud gave him an ounce of affection, and he had lapped it up, like he was a thirst-driven man in the desert.

Leon was sure he had found his true mate in Cloud. All Cloud saw was an easy, convenient lay.

Leon's smile turned quickly into a glare.

Cloud's forehead creased with confusion. He expected Leon to yell at him or at least throw the box of Gummi parts at him.

Instead, Leon slowly walked past Cloud and marched directly back to the Hollow Bastion Restoration Committee's house, where his room was located.

Cloud, not sure of what was going through Leon's mind, stayed in the Marketplace. He was sure if he met Leon privately, in his room, Leon would start crying.

Cloud told himself that it wasn't Leon's tears that would disturb him. He just hated criers, in general.

XXX

Cid stopped his rapid typing, on his computer keyboard, as Leon walked in with the same box of Gummi parts that he had left with. He swore to himself as he saw Leon's Lion's glare.

Cloud had been an uncaring dumbfuck again and now his adopted son was hurting.

Cid raised one big hand, and petted Leon's head, as he laid down the parts next to his computer.

Leon stayed on one knee, with his head hung down, accepting the much-needed comfort. "Cid, I think I'm going to go. Is that okay?"

Cid nodded, and harshly cleared his throat, of the tears that were collecting in the back of it. "Ya go on, Son. Deserve a lot better than that stupid fucker anyway. Plenty of guys'll consider themselves blessed to husband themselves to you. Go on now. I better get an e-mail soon's ya land, though."

Leon nodded and straightened up. He kissed Cid's forehead, in thanks, and turned to go to his room.

Aerith got off the couch, embraced him tightly, and they both walked to his room together. "I'll help you pack, little brother."

Leon swore he wouldn't cry, so he only nodded.

Aerith actually did most of the packing.

Leon sort of stood there. His body continued to feel numb. There wasn't much to pack. It actually fit into two medium sized burlap bags.

With that and Lionheart's beloved black case, Leon took one long look around the room, where he had made such hopeful plans, and walked out.

Aerith closing the door behind them.

Aerith waved, smiling as Leon walked away towards the Marketplace, and the Gummi Ship Hangar. She made sure he was around the corner, before her apple-green eyes filled with tears, and she began to cry.

XXX

Leon was so relieved to find both Cloud and Tifa gone from the Marketplace when he walked through. Not that Cloud would have lifted one gloved finger to stop him, Leon just didn't want to deal, with the added drama, of seeing either one of them at all.

When Leon arrived at the Gummi Hangar, he marched to the ticket window and asked where the very next Gummi Ship flight was departing to. The ticket-seller informed him, briskly, that the next flight for Twilight Town would be leaving in two minutes. Leon firmly nodded, paid the fee, and walked towards the waiting Gummi Ship.

Leon almost made it to the stairs, leading to the hatch, when two small, but wire-strong arms clung tightly to his waist and refused to let go. He hung his head as he heard a tear-filled, shaky voice behind him. Her voice should never sound that way. She should always be bouncing and happy. Damned Cloud!

"Don't go, Leon. I need my big brother here. Don't leave me all alone again."

Leon gingerly turned around, so he could lean down, and kiss the top of Yuffie's head. She clung even harder and began to sob, wetting the front of his shirt. "I have to go, Yuf. I can't stay here. It hurts too much."

Leon leaned in to better hear Yuffie's muffled words. "I wanna go too! You said you'd always be my big brother and take care of me! You promised, Leon!"

Leon frowned for a minute, and thought of a quick way to placate her, so she would, at least, let go. He was going to send for her later, anyway. He just had to get settled first. "Well, you're still teaching that self-defense class to the mothers and small children for a few more weeks, right?"

Yuffie nodded her head, wiping her nose on Leon's shirt.

"Remember, we always finish what we start. Right?"

Yuffie slowly nodded again, with a small sniff.

"I was going to notify Cid in an e-mail when I arrived, but you can tell him just as well. As soon as I'm settled, I'll send money, so Aerith can purchase you a Gummi Ship ticket, so you can stay with me."

Yuffie queried, in a little girl voice that Leon hadn't heard in forever. "No fooling, Leon? Won't leave me alone, again?"

Leon hugged her small body tightly to his, with his one free hand. "I always keep my promises, Little Sister. Always and forever."

Yuffie thought for a moment, gathered her inner Great Ninja strength, and let her Big Brother go.

Leon felt Yuffie release him. He kissed the top of her head, whispered that he loved her, and ran up the stairs. The Gummi ship hatch slamming shut behind him. He propped Lionheart's case in the seat next to his own, dropped the bags on the floor next to it, and flopped into the waiting seat.

Leon waited until the Gummi pilot announced that the ship had now left Radiant Garden's airspace before he burst into tears.