I've started that story a little bit before the season five finale from an idea that just wouldn't get out of my head but once the finale aired, I wasn't really up for it anymore since it's pretty angsty at some point and I was all about the fluff at the time. Now that I feel like I'm kind of over the finale, I'm going to try and finish this. The title is pretty self explanatory and the story is set in a non-SHIELD AU where they never became friends back in university. As you may have noticed, it's rated E and is going to be pretty smutty (although some chapters will be very smutty, others not at all) and it's also my first time experimenting with non linear timeline and flashbacks. So every time we go back in time or come back to the present, the time and place will be stated in bold letters to make easier to understand. I already have three chapters finished and it will most likely be around seven or eight chapters total. I'll update as often as possible and at least the next one should be up as soon as I've finished proof-reading it.

As always and especially now that I'm experimenting with something new, reviews will be most welcome!

-0-0-0-

San Fransisco annual BioTech conference, February 2018

Jemma was a smart woman. More than that even, she was a certified genius: two PHDs obtained before she even turned eighteen, a prestigious job at Sci-Tech industries offered to her before she was even out of university, and promoted as head of the biochem division only three years later when she was barely old enough to go out for a drink to celebrate with her friends. So when she was invited to be one of the star speakers at one of the most prestigious biotech conferences in the US for the third year in a row, the only things she should have been worried about were if she'd rehearsed her speech well enough for it not to sound like she was reading her notes too much or if there wasn't a single picture missing from her presentation. She supposed it was only human to regret that she didn't check in the mirror one last time to see if her hair looked okay or if she didn't have lipstick on her teeth. What she definitely shouldn't have been worried about though, as she faced a room full of people who came to listen to her talk about her latest break-through in biochemistry, was the fabric of her ridiculously small and uncomfortable (but really quite flattering) underwear digging into her skin and how she had to be discreet enough so that people didn't notice how she had to squirm to release the awful itch caused by that stupid lace the sales lady had insisted was of the best possible quality.

As she scanned the room for familiar faces, for a second she wondered how she'd come to be THAT woman. And as her gaze locked on one specific blue eyed engineer's face, she remembered that, of course, she knew exactly how she'd come to be that woman. Even in the relative darkness of the room, his annoyingly beautiful face stood out from the crowd, his small smile and bright eyes a perfect mask of innocence as he looked up at her with, she had to admit, most likely sincere interest. Things had taken an unexpected turn exactly a year ago at that same conference but she supposed she should have known he was trouble the moment she stumbled upon him at another conference in Houston almost two years prior to that. She hadn't seen him since Oxford's graduation party four years before that and considering what had happened that night between them and how he'd disappeared after, they'd resumed their previous "relationship" that consisted of arguing and bickering over even the smallest things every time they spent even just a few minutes in the same room. Back then and just as it had been at university, it never really occurred to her that she could just avoid him -after all those conferences always took place in huge hotels and lasted a few days at the most, it would have been easy enough- but she supposed that even then, there was some sort of irresistible kind of love-hate attraction between them -not to mention the memory of that party years ago- and it was only confirmed when things finally took quite a heated -and in retrospect not so unexpected- turn. Trying to turn her focus back to her lecture, she used the small time she had between two sections of her speech to take a deep breath, shake her head, and find a few other friendly faces in the crowd that didn't fill her brain with dirty images and confusing feelings.

The rest of her lecture went by pretty smoothly. Of course, she knew the material was really good and she was usually a pretty good public speaker -her accent helping her being taken seriously despite her young age- so once she was able to push certain distractions to the back of her mind, she managed to captivate the audience and deliver a rather flawless speech if she said so herself. As was expected, there were several questions at the end, a few ones actually interesting, and once she left the stage, she was quite overwhelmed by the amount of people who wanted to talk to her more privately. There were the old friends or colleagues simply congratulating her and the few people who were apparently too shy to ask their questions in public. Her dendrotoxine being quite the break-through, her big boss had warned her that there would be other companies trying to recrute her, and when she saw how many actually did, she finally understood why her bonus had been so generous a few months ago and why she was staying in one of the deluxe rooms this year. (and also most likely why her boss had found some free time to come this year as well). And of course, and it was sadly not a first, there was the creepy old guy making barely disguised and pretty disgusting flirty comments, from whom she fortunately easily managed to escape thanks to a few sharp comebacks and the presence of her rather physically impressive friend and colleague Bobbi Morse, who somehow always managed to appear threatening (if she wanted to) without ever taking the smile off her face.

By the time Bobbi had to say goodbye to go and get ready for dinner with a friend, the room was empty and Fitz was nowhere to be seen. After the initial pang of disappointment, she reasoned that he probably had quite a busy schedule as well. Apart from the talks, those conferences were also good opportunities to catch up with old friends and colleagues but mostly the perfect place to have professional meetings and job interviews with companies from all over the globe without having to take a single hour off work or arouse suspicion. She didn't know if Fitz was actually looking for another job, he seemed content with what he was doing at the moment, but he was also rather secretive about work in general so who knew? And that was why she also suspected he'd been working for the government immediately after graduating, which would explain why they'd never crossed paths until a few years ago or why she couldn't find a single thing he might have published during those years, which she found surprising, brilliant as he was. Not that she thought of him so often, not at all. She'd just be stuck on something at work that required an engineer and when she couldn't find one that was good enough, her mind would automatically stray towards Fitz. But the few times she was desperate enough to think about contacting him and actually looked, she couldn't even find a trace of him on a company website or social medias, until she unexpectedly saw his name on the program of the science and technology conference of Chicago almost three years ago.

Anyway, he probably had better things to do than wait for her to finish answering everyone's questions, and the night was still young. It was only 6 PM and even though she didn't feel like having dinner already, it felt like the perfect time to grab a drink from the hotel bar, the nice one with a pretty impressive view over the city and an actual fireplace. Pondering for a moment if she should go back to her room to change into something a bit more comfortable, she finally decided against it and used the elevator to go all the way up to the last floor. After taking a quick detour to the ladies' room to freshen up a bit, she, not very convincingly, lied to herself as she took a look around the still rather empty bar and told herself she could use this time to catch up with a few old colleagues she didn't have time to see anywhere other than during conferences a few times a year. Because if she was obviously disappointed about not seeing one specific mop of sandy blond curls, she was actually also rather relieved not to see any other familiar face that would potentially prevent him from coming to see her later. Because, let's be honest, she didn't go to all the trouble of wearing those bloody stupid underwear all afternoon for them to remain hidden under her clothes all evening.

-0-0-0-

When he finally came to talk to her almost an hour later, she thought for a few moments that things might be different this time. For a year, she'd been coming to every conference knowing he'd be there and hoping against hope that instead of hot angry dirty sex resulting from a strange mix of flirting, passionate conversation and infuriating arguing, they'd actually have a civilized conversation, maybe even dinner and yes, hopefully sex but something sweeter that would lead to maybe … more and a conversation about what they were supposed to be to one another outside of hotel rooms (or hotel bars or conference room supply closets or …) Well she'd find out soon enough.

He cleared his throat almost shyly as he approached her but still managed to make her jump a little bit, absorbed as she was by the book on artificial intelligence she was reading. When she looked up at him, he was wearing one of those adorable soft smiles that made her wish every time that she could just give in to her instincts of welcoming him with a sweet loving kiss, and was holding a pint in one hand and a glass of what looked like to be gin in the other. Of course by now, he knew what she liked to drink. Actually he knew what she liked, period.

"Am I interrupting anything?" He asked with a small grin and a tilt of his head.

"Mmmh …" She pretended to think. "Nothing that cannot wait until later I suppose." She said, carefully placing her bookmark into her book and motioning for him to sit in the armchair across from hers. "Much later hopefully" She added to herself.

"So … busy day?" She asked once he'd settled and, she noticed with a small grin, moved his armchair around so he'd sit closer to her.

"Not really actually … nothing really interesting to see besides your lecture … been sitting over there looking at you for half an hour" he said, nodding to the other side of the bar with a tilt of his head and she raised her eyebrows.

"Bit creepy, isn't it?" She teased.

"No just you seemed really fascinated with that book and you know … making sure you weren't waiting for anyone. Didn't want to impose on you if you did …" He said with that same soft smile. He'd gotten better at controlling his emotions over the years and she would have believed him if it wasn't for the mischievous sparkle in his eyes. Because of course he knew he was the one who recommended this book and he knew she hadn't been waiting for anyone else but him and he knew that she knew he knew. She would have rolled her eyes at him but she liked that definitely very flirty and less angry edge she thought their conversations had taken since that last conference in Berlin or maybe even that other one in Baltimore.

"How thoughtful … But no I was just you know … relaxing a bit …" She replied in a slightly lower tone as she crossed one leg over the other, knowing it would rid her skirt up a bit. He tried to hide it but she could see his adam's apple bob as he swallowed a little harder than usual. She never thought much of her legs, didn't think they were her best asset considering her height, but Fitz loved them and he had a thing for skirts too and well, two could play at this game.

"Oh yeah …" He said, clearing his throat. "Big day for you, right? You were quite popular back there!"

"Yes … people seemed to think it was rather promising! Even got a few job offers after my lecture actually, even one from a pretty interesting company in London." She said with a wide smile he reciprocated immediately. It was nice to feel wanted. It wasn't the first time she had a job offer after one of her lectures, especially since she became head of biochem and started going to so many of those conferences but she still wasn't quite used to it.

"Well I didn't expect any less, you're getting really impressive results with your dendrotoxine. And are you interested in any of those offers? I mean I suppose it'd be nice to be closer to home but I thought you liked it at SciTech … "

"Oh no I do, I love the work I'm doing there. None of those jobs would be give me the freedom I have at SciTech but … you know I suppose I just appreciate the interest."

Ah … yeah of course." He replied, sounding almost relieved. Why would he be worried about her leaving SciTech? Was he scared that he wouldn't see her as much if she left the US maybe? Was that him being possessive? No. He didn't think of her that way or he wouldn't have left like he did back when they were seventeen. And even if those feelings were new, considering what had been happening between them for a year, he would have said something by now. She thought she'd sent him enough signals to show him she wanted more than what they had. She was probably reading into it too much or maybe she was just seeing what she wanted to see.

"So … pretty impressive hu?" She asked, grinning. They usually had to argue for hours before he'd eventually agree that her work was any good.

"Well of course it is! I told you yours was the only interesting lecture today and we both know we're the smartest people in this hotel anyway." He replied with a roll of his eyes but she couldn't help noticing how he'd twisted his body to the side and was bending over his armrest to get closer to her. Close enough that she could smell his discreet cologne.

"WE are the smartest people in this hotel?" She repeated, raising her eyebrows up to her hairline. "Fitz, how much have you been drinking?" She teased.

"First drink of the conference actually!" He said, clinking the thick glass of his pint against the delicate glassware containing her gin. "Cheers!"

"Cheers!" She replied. "And thanks …" She added with a smile, taking a small gulp of what was really good gin, much better than the one she'd been drinking for an hour and she chastised herself for wanting to see that fact for more than what it was. Fitz was a gentleman and a generous man in more than one aspect of his life and if he was going to get someone a drink, it would be from one of the top shelf bottles.

"But really, we might have been fighting and arguing for the better part of ten years but I never denied that you were the smartest person I know Simmons. And I always look forward to your lectures at every conference."

"Oh …" Was all she could say. There was an earnestness in his eyes that kind of took her breath away and prevented her from pointing out that he forgot to say "except for me".

"And I think that dendrotoxine is quite possibly the best thing you ever worked on. It could be revolutionary in so many fields of science and technology …"

"I know! That's the idea. It's only just been officially approved for human testing but I'm pretty sure that by experimenting with dosage or coupled with other molecules, it could potentially be used as anesthetics for surgery or as a tranquilizer without all the side effects those usually have …"

"Yeah yeah those are all really good applications Simmons and I …" He cut her off and she knew exactly what was coming.

"But?" She said, raising a defiant eyebrow.

"What?"

"There's always a "but" coming with you Fitz …"

"No I was just agreeing with you on …" He started but when he looked up to meet her disbelieving gaze, he let out a resigned sigh. "Fine I just … I think those are great applications, I really do, but there are so many more ways to use it, it's just too bad that you would only go towards the medical field …"

"Well why does that surprise you? That's what I specialized in …"

"I know I know but I wish you wouldn't limit your imagination so much, if you could work on it with someone else, maybe …"

"Ugh Fitz!" She finally cried out.

It was possibly a record. They probably never spent so many minutes speaking to each other without one of them crying out the other's name in exasperation and she chastised herself for getting her hopes up that things would go differently. And now that the conversation had started going that way, she knew exactly where it was going and the only unknown was which room they would end up the night in. Because that was exactly how it all started a year ago and that was exactly how things happened almost every other time they'd seen each other since then. Even though they didn't really talk about it, there was some sort of unspoken agreement that what they had was just sex and shouldn't lead to more. Ever since that first time, the moment their gaze locked again even across a crowded room, they knew how the night would end. But she'd actually come to realize, over the months, was that she just never wanted it to end.