Trust and Communication
Deanlu
Rizzoli and Isles are the property of TNT and Tess Gerritson. Sometimes arguments with your partner lead to one shots full of pain and discovery.
Jane was aggravated. The guys could tell all evening. They knew it had to do with Maura and that something had happened to force Jane to poker night. It wasn't just that she hadn't joined the guys in a long time. It was the general way Jane was acting. In fact the guys hadn't seen Jane at Friday Night Poker since she had married Maura. They had been playing for an hour. Jane was up a hundred dollars.
"Okay, I bid ten." Jane threw in her ten and watched Frost. She took a swig off her beer glancing at the clock. She looked back at her cards. She had three tens and a two and a three.
"Okay, see you're ten." Jane watched as he didn't raise, interesting. Korsak was next and he was smiling.
"I see your ten and raise you ten." Korsak said tossing his money into the pot. He looked up and smiled. Jane studied her cards while watching Crowe toss in his cards.
"I'm out." Crowe said getting up and getting a beer. He checked out some of the BBQ wings that Frost had brought while the others completed the round. Jane continued to study her card.
"I raise you all five," Jane threw in five dollars and then laid her cards down. Frost studied his cards and then threw them down.
"I'm out." Frost said and got up to join Crowe. Korsak studied his cards and matched Jane's five.
"I call." Korsak said. Jane laid out her three tens and then reached for the pot. "Ah ah ah! Read em and weep Jane." Korsak laid out three Jacks.
"Shit!" Jane got up shaking her head while Korsak laughed. She joined Crowe and Frost in the kitchen.
"Come to papa!" Korsak said as he pulled the pot in the center of the table to him. "So what's the real reason you're playing poker with us tonight Jane? You hardly leave Maura's side after work." Jane looked over at Korsak. Leave it to her former partner to root out there was something more to her poker playing.
"Nothing just needed a break tonight." Jane said turning away as Frankie came back through the door. He had gone out to pick up some more beer.
"What did I miss?" Frankie said as he placed the beer in the fridge.
"Your sister was about to tell us why she was really playing poker tonight." Frost said as Frankie looked over at Jane.
"You haven't told them. Come on Jane. They are your partners." Jane glared at Frankie. Frankie shut up grabbing a piece of pizza that Jane had brought. Jane dropped her head allowing her hair to fall forward like a curtain.
"Maura and I had an argument. It's nothing major." Jane said grabbing another beer and throwing in for the next game.
"That's not what I heard." Frankie said as he threw in for the next hand as everyone was seated. Jane turned on him grimacing. "I heard it from the guest house. I also heard you were spending three nights on the couch."
"How the hell would you know? After all it's none of your business." Jane said angrily checking her cards. She looked toward the clock knowing that Maura would just be entering into the first few minutes of the symphony after having dinner with her friend. Jealousy was not a nice trait for Jane, but it was the one she was dealing with now.
"You could have gone to the symphony with her Jane. You didn't need to come to poker with us. We understand. I raise five." Frost said as he looked at his cards. Jane sighed. There was no way the guys were going to let her off the hook on this.
"So what was the fight about Rizzoli?" Crowe asked as he matched Frost's five and threw in five more. Jane laid down two cards and picked up the two new ones that were handed to her. She looked up to see them all looking at her.
"Maura met an old friend from college. She made a date to go out with her for dinner and the symphony." Jane said softly her thoughts jumbled and confused. She threw her cards down and got up. She chugged a beer in the kitchen and opened another one.
"So she is going out with this friend. She loves you and she married you. Let her have a night with a friend. There is no harm in it." Frost said as he tossed his cards in as Jane returned to the table. Jane said nothing as Frankie raised the bet and added that everyone had to do shots this round if he won the pot. Korsak and Crowe matched him and ended up losing to Frankie's full house. Shots were handed out and the detectives gave the normal cheer.
"Salud." They all said. Jane hated tequila. It had gotten her in a lot of trouble as a youth and now here she was trying it again.
"They were lovers at one time." Jane said suddenly as the guys became quiet and looked at her. Nervous glances and shocked faces reflected back from the guys.
"Whoa!" Crowe said as he looked at Korsak and Frost. Frankie looked sympathetically at his sister. "That would be a tough one even for me." Crowe said sympathetically.
"Maura told me I didn't trust her after I told her she couldn't go out with this woman. We had a terrible argument. We both said things we shouldn't have." Jane said her voice tight and the tension in her body telling her friends how badly this was affecting her. "This woman is everything I am not. She's an accomplished brain surgeon. She's well-traveled and highly educated. She's wealthy. She can give Maura everything I can't." Jane said softly. She would never share this with anyone else. These men who stood by her whom she considered her closest friends were the only ones she would ever share this information with.
"She loves you Jane. She chose you. She is just a friend." Korsak said softly. Jane smiled rising and grabbing her coat.
"I know. I trust Maura with everything. I just don't trust the woman she is out with tonight. I'm going home guys." Jane said walking out the door and heading to her car.
"Jane, Jane! Come on back and play." Frankie called knowing he was at fault for bringing it up.
"Nah, I'll be okay. Call ya when I get home." Jane said as she headed toward her car. Frankie watched for a few moments then went back inside. Jane looked at her car for long time thinking about how much alcohol she had and turned walking down the street. It was cold and there was a light mist falling outside. Her house was quite a distance from Frost's, but Jane needed the walk to clear her mind. She had been cruel in the fight and the couch was an appropriate punishment. Though Jane felt she deserved worse. God, she loved Maura with every fiber of her being. She trusted her implicitly. She just didn't like the idea of her wife going out with a former lover. It stung her heart bad. Jane sighed as she looked up at the sky. Maybe Maura just didn't understand how others looked at her. The minute Jane had seen this woman she knew she was trying to break their marriage up and take Maura for herself. It wasn't old friends catching up. The walk was lonely. It reminded her of before Maura and she had married. Jane had been known to take long walks where she would just disappear for hours trying to sort her problems out. A car pulled up next to Jane.
"Hey, want a ride sis?" Frankie said through the open window. She glanced over and noticed he had her car.
"Nah, I need the fresh air. It's okay Frankie." Jane said refusing as the sorrow and anger in her forced her pride to refuse. Frankie wasn't to be dissuaded.
"Come on. I'll get you home and then leave you alone." Frankie said. "Otherwise I may have to call ma."
"Dammit Frankie, can't I just have some time alone?" Jane yelled. Frankie sighed and tried another tack.
"I tell you what at least let me drop ya a mile from the house. You can walk from there. Please Jane. It's a five mile walk back home." Frankie pleaded as Jane finally stopped. She got in the car and Frankie began the drive toward Jane and Maura's house.
"Ya know I don't blame Maura. Her friend is gorgeous and had everything to offer her." Jane said softly as her heart broke a little more. Frankie shook his head.
"Jane, she is not going with this woman. She is out with a friend. She will not cheat on you. She will not leave you." Frankie said softly. "I know this is driving you crazy because you love Maura so deeply. Have some faith in her, even if you don't trust this other woman." Jane sighed and nodded. The rest of the trip was in silence leaving Jane alone with her thoughts. None of which were good. A mile from the house Frankie dropped Jane.
"Are you sure you want to walk the rest of the way. It's getting really cold now." Frankie looked worriedly at Jane. He knew how the cold affected her hands and the wound from her shooting.
"Yeah, I'll be fine. Thanks Frankie. I appreciate it." Jane watched him pull away. Jane stood in rain and looked at the sky for a long time. The cold wind invaded her body stealing the warmth and bringing the pain of old injuries. She sighed again. It came down to trust and talking. She needed to communicate to Maura how much this bothered her by not yelling and making things worse. Jane began walking home slowly letting the north wind chill her to the bone. Thirty minutes later she reached her home. It was dark, but Frankie had turned on the outside light. She entered the security code that would open the door. She closed the door locking it and hung her coat. Suddenly warm arms wrapped around her and pulled her back into a familiar body. Soft kisses rained down her neck as tears wet her skin running down her collar bone to her breast.
"I am so sorry. I am so sorry Jane. I love you so much." Maura's soft words called to the bleeding heart of her soul mate. "I never meant for this to hurt you. I didn't think how it would appear to you." Jane turned in Maura's arms looking down. Maura was dressed in jeans and a blue blouse. Jane glanced at the clock on the wall in the hallway noticing the symphony would still be going on and only into their fourth movement.
"Shh, come on. Let's go in here and talk." Maura said softly pulling JAne with her even as Jane clung to her. They sat on the couch as Maura desperately tried to explain to Jane.
"I know you trust me Jane. I didn't mean to make you doubt me. I love you so much." Maura said watching the dull pain in Jane's eyes recede some. "We went to dinner tonight. I thought this would be a friendly meeting. I was naïve Jane about what she wanted. I should have listened to you." Maura said watching the anger flare into Jane's eyes. "Everything was going well, until we headed to the symphony. On the ride over she got a little too close and made suggestions I would never agree too. I should have seen it while we enjoyed dinner, but our earlier argument had blinded me." Jane nodded not saying anything, but she never let go of Maura's hand. "I had the car stop and got out. I called a cab and came home. I made it very clear that I love you and am happy with you. When I got home I called Frost. He told me you had started out for home over an hour ago. I was in a panic something had happened to you. That you had been hurt or that you had left me." Maura's voice cracked as tears trailed down her face. "Frost told me not to worry Frankie would find me. Frankie let me know when he arrived that you were walking. I'm sorry. I'm sooo sorry Jane." Jane sighed. She couldn't let Maura take all the blame. She carried as much of it as the woman she loved. She pulled Maura into her arms and kissed her softly. She gently pulled away from Maura.
"I'm partly to blame for this Maura. I told you I'm not good at telling people, telling you how I feel and why I feel that way. I was uncomfortable with you going out with an old lover. I knew I could trust you. I just didn't trust her. I know how people are who want something…someone." Jane said her eyes watching Maura's face as the horror of how deeply she had hurt Jane came home. "You're the only one for me Maura Isles. But there are so many people who you could have and who would have you. The only thing that makes me special is that you love me Maura." The tears flowed continuously and softly down Maura's face as Jane's joined hers. "I'm sorry I said the things I did. I don't believe them of you. I was so desperate for you not to go I lashed out in my pain. I'm sorry. I should have gone with you and quietly been by your side. I won't make that mistake again. Next time you go to meet an old friend we go together. Not because I don't trust, but because anyone in our life now has to see us as a couple. It doesn't mean I will keep you from going with your friends. It just means that I want to be included Maur so they know who your wife is just as I will include you if the same happens. I don't want any doubts between us." Jane said softly as Maura nodded. "I'm sorry Maura. I'm sorry I am not what you wanted in a wife." Maura placed her fingers over Jane's lips.
"You are everything I wanted in a wife, lover, partner, and friend. Please let the doubt go." Maura said as Jane nodded. A slight chill ran down Jane's back and Maura noticed her lover's body was colder than normal. "Come on, I have the perfect solution for the cold." Maura rose pulling Jane with her. The doctor led Jane to their bedroom and into the bathroom where a steaming bath sat. She divested her detective of clothes and helped Jane into the water. A few moments later she joined her sliding in behind Jane and holding her close.
"I love you Jane. This will not happen again." Maura whispered as her hand traveled softly over Jane's body soothing the detectives physical aches even as her warmth and love soothed the emotional heartache. Jane leaned her head back kissing her wife softly along the throat and relaxing into her body.
"No more misunderstandings. I neglected our love. That will not happen again. I love you Maura." Jane said as soft spoken words echoed through their home. Outside the world bleak, cold, damp and grey built a foreboding presence, while inside this house of two built up the hopeful warmth of a vibrant love for the future.
The End.