Hey! This idea has been playing in my mind for months! The song I'm quoating is 'alone I break' by Korn. This song screams jasper. I will get back to my other story, I just had to write this. Will be a two shot.

Dont own!

INSURRECTION.

CHAPTER ONE.

'Pick me up,

Been bleeding too long.

Right here, right now,

I'll stop it some how...'

My eyes opened with a jolt. I surveyed my surroundings. Dark. Cold. Barron. Just like my insides. I was caught up in memories of my change. The pain, the burn, the many bites that bled from being bitten too deep... Too many bites into my supple flesh. My own screams ripping from my throat painfully. Coughing and spluttering and taking in shuddering breaths... I wanted to die. I was dying. But, I wake to find my body bursting with energy, thirst, the need to rip, shred, and kill. My own empathic gift rendering me a raging mad man. Kill. Kill the thing that bestowed this life upon me. Maria. But, I couldn't. No matter how much my enraged body and soul screamed for it. I settled into my 'new life'. It was horrific, but Once I realised I had a special ability, I yielded and harnessed it. In doing so, I could detach myself and control everyone around me. Maria was quite impressed. Call it the soldier in me, but I couldn't shake of my 'call of duty' attitude towards my new life. It was taxing to say the least. All the lives brutally ended by my hand weighed heavy on my heart. Every time I acquired a new scar from the never ending battles, the pain shot through my soul as well, tainting everything I believed and was brought up to be. I wanted death. Even more so now since I let my only friend escape with his mate. The love, devotion and pure unadulterated trust and loyalty I felt... I couldn't bring myself to let that die at my hand. I understand why Maria orders we kill mates on sight. To feel something so powerful for another being. I didn't know it existed. I'll forever remember the mix of feelings. I'm a cold man, but that changed something inside of me. A newfound anger and sorrow wash through me stronger than before... Hundreds of vampires I've beheaded and burned for the simple crime of having a mate. I did that. I took everything away. The God of war indeed. I'd spit on that title if I could. I can't be here anymore. I close my eyes in pain. My fist clenched so tight that my nails have cut through my palm. It hurts. I deserve it...

'I will make it go away,

Can't be here no more.

Seems this is the only way.

I will soon be gone.

These feelings will be gone.

These feelings will be gone.'

I can't just die on the battle field. The solider in me will not allow it. Maria won't have me killed. I'm too valuable. The newborns are frightened of me, and give me a wide berth whenever I'm within their line of sight. I can't kill myself, it's physically impossible. I punch the ground in frustration. I can hear Maria coming. She has starved me for two weeks now. I can't bear to look her in the eye, much less the rest of her. Her velvet voice sends cold chills up my spine. I can not liken the feeling I feel in her presence now to anything I have ever felt. I despise her. I want out of here. Dying obviously isn't an option, or whatever it is you call it when we are broken and burned... Cease to exist.

Her voice filters in through the open door way. I physically move myself as far away from her as this place with walls will allow me. She sees it as me cowering in fear. She is an imbecile. I'm anything but afraid of her. I don't hear what she says, but I agree none the less. It shuts her up and removes her from my line of vision. I could leave... But where would I go? The world has grown and changed in the last century. Things in the human world are different, confusing. This is something that must take careful planning. Out of my broken insides, a small ray of hope shines. Just a flicker, but enough to keep me going and living this life. I couldn't call it living. Not even just existing... It's less then that. I need to leave this place. Killing and fighting was what I was created for, what I yearned for... Peter and Charlotte changed that. They opened up a new world of feelings and hope for me. I hated and loved it. Bittersweet...

'Now I see the times they change

Leaving doesn't seem so strange

I am hoping I can find

Where to leave my hurt behind.

All this shit I seem to take

All alone I seem to break.

I have lived the best I can

Does this make me not a man?'

I pick myself up from the ground. I feed, and I revert back to my usual cold, stoic self. This life is all I know. Can I really leave this place? On one hand, I love the thrill of battle, the screeching of metal when I'm tearing limbs, the screams of terror, the cries of pain, the sweet smell of burning flesh. But, the pure emotions I felt from Peter and Charlotte... It has me conflicted.

I head back to the camp base. I can feel a stir of curious emotions coming from the newborns. They know Maria punished me. I can feel them scrutinising me. Quick as lighting, I grab the closest newborn and rip his arm right out of his socket, and throw it far into the woods. He starts to whimper, so I stomp my booted foot on his chest, and slowly rip his head from his neck, drawing it out, relishing the fear I can feel around me. I hold the head by its hair up in the air; the simple action a gesture to all. I may have been indisposed for two weeks, but that doesn't mean I'm not to be respected or trifled with. I toss the head behind me. I walk away only when all eyes are down cast and necks are bared. Satisfied, I head for Maria. I need some other things that need attending to. To not raise any suspicion of my possible rebellion or disgust for her, I swallow my pride and join her in her quarters. Keeping Maria happy means keeping my 'planning' to myself.

We were heading out to battle at sundown. I felt the familiar hum of anticipation shoot through me. The newborns were more anxious of late. There was a new warrior on the 'opposing side'. A woman no less. She's fast, lethal, and completely frightening. She's a small slip of a thing, quite deceiving. Or so I hear. She has eluded me on the battlefield. She has killed many of my newborns. Quite the pain in the ass. Making newborns isn't exactly a walk in the park. It seems she could almost be my equal. Almost. I can almost feel her shame and terror as I rip her apart. Savage. Bring on the battle. The major will do away with her stupidity at angering the fiercest warrior that ever existed. I closed my eyes in anticipation. I locked away any feelings of rebellion for now. My target was on her. The excitement almost over whelmed me. This was new... Never had the anticipation of a battle since my newborn year got me almost jumping from foot to foot, restlessly waiting to meet my enemy head on. Something is definitely different from within me.

'Am I going to leave this place?

What is it I'm running from?

Is there nothing more to come?

(Am I going to leave this race?)

I guess gods up in this place?

What is it that I've become?

Is there something more to come?'