I don't own Percy Jackson and the Olympians or any affiliated characters.
Inspired by the song Payphone by Maroon 5, which makes no sense because it's an upbeat song, but I heard it on the bus and thought of this.
burn it down
He's at a payphone. Somewhere in the darkness behind him, he can hear voices—screams, angry cries, yelling for someone to save them.
He's done it again.
Hands shaking, he punches in a number he knows by heart.
"Piper?"
"Leo?" Her voice is groggy and quiet, and he realizes that it's the middle of the night.
"I—" He can't say it out loud, not to her.
I lost control, I lost it, people are dead.
"I messed up big time," he says finally, not bothering to inject the usual forced humor into his voice. He assumes the 'again' is implied.
Piper says nothing. The silence is audible, and he thinks she is about to hang up on him when she speaks. "Where are you?"
He gives her the address, voice shaking, and slides down the side of the payphone.
She shows up shortly after in a shiny silver car he could have sworn was Jason's (and wait, it is Jason's, so they are living together), taking in the burnt, ruined block and his tear streaked face. She doesn't ask what happened.
He gets in silently and for a while, nothing is said. He hopes the silence says it all (I didn't mean to, please don't hate me, I didn't mean it), because if he opens up his mouth he knows he will burst into tears or puke or do something equally regrettable, and he doesn't want to lose control again.
She turns on the radio and something very pop and bouncy blasts through the car. She turns it down, just a little, before sighing loudly and turning to face him.
"Leo." Her voice is hesitant. "Why?"
He shrugs, staring at his hands. "I don't know." His voice cracks pathetically and he knows that even a complete stranger could have seen through his lie. "I just—"
"You just what? Leo, this is—this has to stop. I can't keep doing this. We can't keep doing this."
He frowns, clenching his fists as the fire (raging, burning, all-consuming fire) begins to tug at his gut. He can't open his mouth, he can't speak, because he knows if he does he'll snap and he can't afford do that, not here, not with her.
"Why?" she repeats, desperately, grabbing his arm and digging her nails into his skin. "What is this about? Leo, just come back home to camp—or to my place, Jason and I can help you, we don't mind!—just please stop doing this! Please."
She's shaking now, maybe crying—he doesn't turn to check. He can hear the pain in her voice, the desperation, but it doesn't bother him, not anymore. She's done this every night since it started and he doesn't care anymore (or at least he tells himself that) and she should know that by now.
He gulps and grabs a bottle of water from the floor of the car and gulps it down all at once, trying to drown himself and the fire and all his problems. Piper is looking at him wearily, the same way Jason had just before kicking him out.
He shivers.
"Leo." Suddenly her voice is hard and cold, and he guesses that this is it. He's about to lose her.
"It's you, okay?" he blurts out, then winces at the look she gives him. "You're the reason everything's gone to Hades. This is all. Your. Fault!"
She gapes at him, snarls, and slaps him. "What the Hades is your problem, Leo? How in the name of Zeus is this my fault?"
Leo says nothing. "I'm sorry, Piper. I just can't—" he cuts off and gestures to the car, himself, her, trying to explain with actions what he can't with words.
I can't stand seeing you with Jason.
Piper's phone rings and she picks it up, albeit reluctantly, and says carefully, "Hi, sweetie. What's wrong?"
She speaks with a soothing layer of charmspeak, but even so, he feels a pang of something (jealously, he thinks, anger—and beneath it all, a raging fire) at her words.
Jason will always be Piper's sweetie, and he will always be just a third wheel.
"I'm okay, Jason—no, no, nothing's wrong—yes, I'm with Leo—for the last time, I'm fine, sweetie."
I can't stand seeing you with Jason because I'm in love with you.
She hangs up.
"Leo," she whispers finally, "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry but—"
She grips his hand tightly and sniffles, looking at him with something akin to regret.
"I need to know, why do you do this to yourself? You've systematically gotten rid of everyone who cares about you, shut everyone out—even Jason has given up on you. I just want to know, why?" She pauses, considering her words. "Why is it my fault?"
He stares at her (I'm in love you, I'm in love with you, I'm in love with you, I'm so fucking in love with you that it hurts) but the words don't come. He can't say anything.
"I'm sorry, Leo, but this is it. You can ruin your life as much as you want, but starting tonight, you can't ruin mine."
(Funny, he thinks, how much she sounds like Jason. And Percy, and Annabeth, and everyone else who's left him alone.)
"I'm sorry," he whispers, and she parks the car and they sit in silence for a while.
"You should leave," she says finally.
"I love you," he says suddenly, just before she shuts the door and drives off. "That's why."
She nods (honestly, he thinks she knew that already) and smiles sadly. "Goodbye, Leo. Call me when you get your life back on track."
He sits down on the curb of the gas station and watches her drive away.
And when the gas station goes up in flames, he doesn't even bat an eye. Because if he was really honest, he wanted to burn something down.
He watches the ashes float away into the wind, and with them, his life.
Her.
(I fucking loved you, and you left me alone.)
Okay, so I should explain. Firstly, this takes place several years in the future, so it is acceptable for Jason and Piper to be in an relationship. As for Leo's angsty, messed up position, I think of it like this: Leo has a history of fire issues. I think those issues are emotionally controlled, so losing control over Piper makes sense. Which brings me to my next idea-I think Leo sort of always felt like a third wheel, and he probably always dreamt of a relationship like the one Piper and Jason have (with Piper, because he's in love with her in my mind). So he started feeling useless or whatever (for reasons you can decide on) and then starting losing control at random innocent locations. And then when everyone got fed up with his self-destruction, htey left, and Piper was the only one who stayed, and eventually he starting feeling more and more useless, and taking that anger out in bad ways, and it just continues. It's a vicious cycle.
Anyways, I hope that makes sense. I hope you enjoyed, and, as always, please read and review.