She
I found the picture in a book I set aside ages ago. There was a girl in the picture. She was so innocent and surrounded by three close friends. Who was this girl in the picture? She looks so happy and carefree. I haven't seen her in such a long time. The girl in this picture was ignorant and lighthearted. She didn't know the ways of the world. She didn't know half the things she knows now. She didn't know heartache. She didn't know pain. She didn't know how to be an artist. She didn't know music didn't come first or second or wherever. She was just a girl at Mickey's with a few close friends. Where had that girl gone? Maybe she's still wrapped up in Ray. Maybe she's lost in the music with Jackson. Maybe she was swept away with Travis. Maybe she actually loves River. Maybe she doesn't. I don't think she's really sure. Maybe she just doesn't know which way's up anymore.
I looked in the mirror half expecting to see the girl in the picture but also a new girl I hadn't taken a glance at since her heart was first broken. I was startled at the girl I saw. It wasn't either. She was a girl somewhere in between. She was just trying to survive in high school. She is not a slut. She is not lost. She doesn't care anymore. She doesn't like labels. She is Shady Lane. She is Lily. She is me.