A/N Thank you to all of you readers! You guys rock! After this instalment, there will be at least one more in the series. Enjoy!
Disclaimer: I own nothing related to Rookie Blue, ABC or GlobalTv. I'm just borrowing the characters for my own amusement.
Sam ran his tongue over his teeth, fighting to keep his head down and his expression disinterested. He was supposed to be finishing up his paperwork, but instead he found himself stealing glances at Andy whenever possible.
"You heading over to the Penny?"
Sam escaped his thoughts and glanced up as Oliver appeared beside his desk. "Not tonight, brother. I got plans."
Andy's head shot up from her spot at the desk across from him.
Shaw, his back to the young officer, raised his eyebrows at his friend. "You have plans?" he asked a little incredulously.
Realizing he had almost given away what he and Andy had agreed should remain between them for now, Sam sat back in his desk chair, shrugging nonchalantly. "Yeah. I plan to go home, have a beer, maybe watch a period of the Leafs game, then get a decent night's sleep. I'm exhausted, my friend; too old to be pulling ops at the last minute like the one yesterday," he explained.
At that, Oliver chuckled, completely understanding and buying the explanation. "I hear ya. I could use a good night's sleep, myself. Though with the girls, that's usually out of the question." He glanced back at Andy. "How're you doing, rookie? You recovered from last night yet?"
Andy shrugged. "Today seemed a little tame in comparison, that's for sure."
"You know, buddy, last I checked, she's not a rookie anymore," Sam piped up, firing her off quick wink Oliver did not notice.
"True," Shaw conceded. "Well, if I don't see you again, have a good night, you two."
"Yeah, yeah, will do. Take it easy, man." He waited until Oliver was out of his line of sight, then he glanced back at Andy, who had turned back to her paper work. He noticed her yawn and could not help but smirk. "Are we keeping you up, McNally?"
She looked over at him a little sheepishly.
He glanced around. He was satisfied that there was no one around that could overhear, but to be safe, he leaned forward a bit, lowering his voice. "Maybe we should forget about tonight."
Her eyes widened. "But –"
"I just meant going out," he assured her, his tone suggesting she was crazy to think he was insinuating they call things off.
Andy hesitated. She was exhausted. She had barely gotten any sleep the night before, and their ten hours on the job today had been fairly quiet – which meant boring, which meant it felt more like eighteen or twenty. However, she really wanted to spend the evening with Sam. For the first time in a long time, she actually felt relaxed and herself. She did not have to try to be anything other than what she was with him. She had not even realized that she had been doing that with Luke until Sam had confronted her the night before about never having to fake it with him. "How 'bout take-out?" she finally suggested. "And we could just stay in?"
He smiled. "Works for me." He glanced at his watch. "Why don't you go ahead and get ready. I'll finish up here."
"There's still this paper work."
"I got it. Go. That's an order, McNally," he said sternly, though there was a twinkle in his eye that was not lost on her.
She rolled her eyes with a smile. "Yes, sir." She packed up her desk, handed him the reports she had not quite finished, and then headed back towards the locker rooms.
Sam knew he could get ready in a quarter of the time it would take her. So he finished up the paper work, then retreated to the men's locker room for a quick shower and to change into his street clothes. Jeans, a white button-down and a leather jacket – not quite his standard issue for after a shift. However, he figured he had held off long enough for everyone else to be gone so he would not have to make another attempt at explaining himself. Not that he was the one he was worried about. He could handle the razzing and whatever other comments were thrown his way. But Andy was still the new kid on the block, and it had also been common knowledge that she and Callaghan were an item. The last thing he wanted was for her to become the talk of the Division for anything more than kicking ass during an undercover operation.
When Sam emerged from the locker room, he was a little surprised to see no sign of Andy. He headed out to the parking lot in case she was waiting by his truck, furrowing his brow when she was not there either. He tossed his bag into the back, locked his truck back up, then headed back into the precinct.
There were a few officers from the afternoon shift around, but everyone from their shift was long gone. Figuring he was safe, he pushed open the door to the women's locker room. "Seriously, McNally, how long does it take you to get ready?" he bellowed when he did not see her by her locker, missing the fact that she was sitting right there in front of him on one of the benches. Finally noticing, he furrowed his eyebrows: her head was bowed, her chest rising and falling quickly as she neared the point of hyperventilation. He rushed over, straddling the bench beside her. "Andy." When she still did not move nor acknowledge his presence, he reached out and placed a hand over one of hers which were resting on her legs, his other hand smoothing down over her hair before rubbing her back gently. "Andy. Breathe, sweetheart."
Her head shot up then as if she had just realized he was there. Her face flushed in embarrassment.
"Just breathe," he said again gently.
Andy's breathing started to deepen and she calmed, her eyes wide in horror at Sam finding her like this.
Once he realized she was going to be okay, he flashed his dimples. "And here all I was hoping for was to make your heart race a little," he quipped.
"Oh, God. Sam..." She averted her eyes, looking down at her lap where his hand was still holding hers.
He narrowed his eyes then as he took her in. She had let her hair down after her shower, and she had changed into a pair of dark wash jeans, ankle boots and a cranberry coloured v-neck sweater over a white, lacy tank top. She looked stunningly beautiful – apart from being panic-stricken. "This about us?"
Andy took a few more deep breaths, her cheeks still tinged with red as she finally raised her gaze to meet his. "I think we both know I'm going to screw up here, so maybe we should save ourselves a lot of time and heartbreak and just stop this before we start."
"I don't think so, McNally. I'm not gonna let you run away just 'cause you got a little scared. Going on the way we have, that's what's gonna end up hurting someone."
She furrowed her brow.
"Look, I don't know what else I can tell you to make you believe that this is gonna work out. And I don't know how to make you trust me –"
"I do trust you. It's just –"
He put up his hand to cut her off. "You think I'm not a little scared, too?" he admitted. "Look, if you'd let me take you home that night outside the Penny, we would've slept together, but that probably would've been it. And as messed up as things got, it's probably good the power came back on the night of the blackout. Because if we'd slept together that night, it wouldn't have been about us. So, instead we've ridden together for the past six months, we've gotten to know each other, to trust each...And now it's not just about sex. We've got a chance for something real here. And I get that that's scary, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't go for it."
"But real means it'll hurt that much more when it ends."
"See that's the problem, McNally. You're going into this already expecting it to end."
"Everything ends, Sam. People walk out all the time," she said softly.
He looked at her sympathetically, suddenly understanding where her doubt and pessimism were coming from. "We're not your parents," he assured her. "Look, this is ours. It's just me and you. Whatever happens, it'll be because of us. But it won't work if I'm constantly fighting an uphill battle because you're just waiting for everything to fall apart. You've got to meet me half-way, Andy."
"I really want this. I don't want you to think I don't."
"You just don't want to get hurt."
She nodded slowly.
"I'll never hurt you, not intentionally. But that's as much as I've got the right to promise you, especially doing what we do," he said honestly.
"I'm kind of a lot of work. You sure you want in on that?"
He chuckled. "Yeah, I'm sure. Everyone's got baggage. That's not enough to scare me off."
"You don't. You don't seem to carry anything around with you."
"Why do you think I pushed you to talk the night you killed the pedophile at the rec centre? You do this job long enough, you learn how to take advantage of your friends and your colleagues. And I watched my sister long enough to know what carrying stuff around with you can do to you."
Andy looked back down at their hands still clasped on her lap, and she intertwined their fingers. "You seem to sure about everything, so I'm going to trust that. As much as it scares me, I'd rather be scared than continue to be miserable fighting against what I feel."
Sam scooted closer and drew her against his chest, kissing the top of her head. He took in her scent and just treasured the feel of her in his arms. He knew she was going to be a challenge – hell, she'd been challenging him since the moment she busted through that crack house door – but somewhere deep inside, he knew it was going to be worth it. She made him feel more alive than anything he had experienced on the job ever had. The fact that she was beautiful and sexy as hell did not hurt, of course. But it was her impetuousness, her natural inquisitiveness, and the contradiction between her naiveté and her street smarts that really got to him. He had not been lying to her the night before when he told her how far she had come. And he trusted her with his life. And despite all of her fears and what seemed like an innate instinct to run, he was not questioning whether or not to trust her with his heart. Maybe that made him the naive one, but he had lived a lot of life in his fifteen years on the job, and no woman had ever made him want to try so hard.
"This is nice," Andy sighed after a few moments of easy silence.
"It would be nicer if we were curled up on my couch with some Chinese and a couple beers."
She laughed softly. "Are you ever not hungry?"
"Oh, I'm hungry, McNally, but it's got nothing to do with take-out," he teased her. He kissed her temple, then stood up, extending his hand. "C'mon. Let's get out of here. I've got a first date with this really cool chick that I've been waiting all day for."
Andy took his hand and stood up, leaning into his side easily. "You keep all this up and you just might get lucky on that date."
Sam smirked. "I think I already got lucky. But if tonight ends some other way than me dropping you off at your door and getting a quick kiss goodnight, I definitely won't be complaining."
She leaned up, murmuring in his ear, "Something you should know about me: I don't do anything quick." With that, she kissed his cheek then headed for the door.
"Oh, yeah. So worth it..." he muttered.